# It is Upon Us: My Daughter Is Using Bad Language **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [September 24, 2006, 2:45am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/it-is-upon-us-my-daughter-is-using-bad-language/373914 "2006-09-24T02:45:25Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![Chefguy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/chefguy/32/138_2.png) [@Chefguy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chefguy)\ **Post date:** [September 24, 2006, 2:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/it-is-upon-us-my-daughter-is-using-bad-language/373914/41 "2006-09-24T14:29:09Z")
[QUOTE=Shagnasty] You and others have it right. The general idea in the story is real. I really don’t care for the Massachusetts accents and my wife likes them even less. My daughter favors me as much as an opposite sex child can yet it is jarring to see her have a speech pattern that is diverging from something I never knew growing up I am sure that many parents that raise kids far away from their own home region feel the same way deep down unless that change is a clear improvement socially speaking. My writing style (and my speaking style even) tends to whoosh some people badly and those that don’t get it tend to hate me. It is written to emphasize hyperbole and the feelings felt. To those of you who reject the basic idea, wouldn’t you be a little alarmed if your progeny started displaying symptoms of a valley girl, redneck, or Bronx accent if that wasn’t the style of speech used by you. There has to be some limit right? Speech pattern education belongs in the parenting realm as much or more than most things because it is so important. I grew up in a seriously tiny redneck town. Even though my mother has a strong Texas accent, she didn’t have some poor country characteristics that the people around us had. I remember her clearly forcing me to say “on” instead of “own” (as in, “I left my keys own the table”) because she thought it sounded ignorant and it really did. Same idea. Using the word wicked in the rest of the English speaking world will get you mocking laughs at best. [/QUOTE] Just wait until she starts putting her clothes in the “chester draws”. I nearly vomited. ---
**Author:** ![Frosted\_Glass](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/frosted_glass/32/3926_2.png) [@Frosted\_Glass](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Frosted_Glass)\ **Post date:** [September 24, 2006, 2:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/it-is-upon-us-my-daughter-is-using-bad-language/373914/42 "2006-09-24T14:55:49Z")
Yinz taking this too seriously. ---
**Author:** ![Mindfield](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mindfield/32/19759_2.png) [@Mindfield](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mindfield)\ **Post date:** [September 24, 2006, 3:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/it-is-upon-us-my-daughter-is-using-bad-language/373914/43 "2006-09-24T15:00:29Z")
Sure, okay, I can get behind the distasteful regionalisms thing. I’d certainly cringe painfully if any child of mine started using the “needs cleaned” type of expression. Though in my neck of the woods it would more likely be gangsta talk, yo, which is even worse, IMHO, than anything out of MA or OH. ---
**Author:** ![Zsofia](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/7bcc69/32.png) [@Zsofia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Zsofia)\ **Post date:** [September 24, 2006, 3:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/it-is-upon-us-my-daughter-is-using-bad-language/373914/44 "2006-09-24T15:54:06Z")
I tell you, you need to nip that shit in the bud. Allowing a child to grow up with one of those Yankee accents is like allowing them to grow up eating with their hands and picking their feet at the table. Particularly the Boston kind, good lord. It’s an awful social handicap on par with dreadful facial disfigurement. And anybody who has an issue with “y’all” can come over here and take it up with me. You’ll be walking over, but you’ll be crawling back. ---
**Author:** ![WhyNot](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/c77e96/32.png) [@WhyNot](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/WhyNot)\ **Post date:** [September 24, 2006, 4:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/it-is-upon-us-my-daughter-is-using-bad-language/373914/45 "2006-09-24T16:01:29Z")
Let’s see if I can make \*\*Zsofia \*\*stroke out, shall we? Hey, **Zsofia**! My kid likes his cornbread sweet and his tea not! 😃 ---
**Author:** ![teela\_brown](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/d9b06d/32.png) [@teela\_brown](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/teela_brown)\ **Post date:** [September 24, 2006, 4:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/it-is-upon-us-my-daughter-is-using-bad-language/373914/46 "2006-09-24T16:05:59Z")
The slang currently being used to death among the younger folk in my office: “Hecka”, as an intensifier; and “Dude”, which is appended to the end of _every single sentence_ I believe “dude” emerged from surfer culture (cue Jeff Lebowski), but I never heard the word “hecka” since I worked at this office. Where did that one come from? ---
**Author:** ![Excalibre](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/898d66/32.png) [@Excalibre](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Excalibre)\ **Post date:** [September 24, 2006, 4:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/it-is-upon-us-my-daughter-is-using-bad-language/373914/47 "2006-09-24T16:09:43Z")
[QUOTE=teela brown] The slang currently being used to death among the younger folk in my office: “Hecka”, as an intensifier; and “Dude”, which is appended to the end of _every single sentence_ I believe “dude” emerged from surfer culture (cue Jeff Lebowski), but I never heard the word “hecka” since I worked at this office. Where did that one come from? [/QUOTE] It came from changing “hella” (remember that one?) to remove the blasphemous “hell” part of it. No, I’m not kidding. People are weird. ---
**Author:** ![JRDelirious](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jrdelirious/32/9531_2.png) [@JRDelirious](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/JRDelirious)\ **Post date:** [September 24, 2006, 4:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/it-is-upon-us-my-daughter-is-using-bad-language/373914/48 "2006-09-24T16:24:44Z")
Dang. That’s a hacka wicked rough phase for a parent. Better ease up on the clam chowdah and lobstah and start feedin’ her some chili and barbecue, dude. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![JRDelirious](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jrdelirious/32/9531_2.png) [@JRDelirious](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/JRDelirious)\ **Post date:** [September 24, 2006, 4:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/it-is-upon-us-my-daughter-is-using-bad-language/373914/49 "2006-09-24T16:25:12Z")
Dang. That’s a hecka wicked rough phase for a parent. Better ease up on the clam chowdah and lobstah and start feedin’ her some chili and barbecue, dude. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Grrr](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/grrr/32/146_2.png) [@Grrr](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Grrr)\ **Post date:** [September 24, 2006, 5:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/it-is-upon-us-my-daughter-is-using-bad-language/373914/50 "2006-09-24T17:51:45Z")
\*_Shag_, Don’t you want your girl to be able to relax in her own home? I think where the parenting comes in should be not so much that she uses these words but rather the differences between formal and informal settings. Which I’m pretty sure comes natural with most kids. ---
**Author:** ![RickJay](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/bb73d2/32.png) [@RickJay](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RickJay)\ **Post date:** [September 24, 2006, 6:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/it-is-upon-us-my-daughter-is-using-bad-language/373914/51 "2006-09-24T18:19:09Z")
[QUOTE=Shagnasty] If I must explain, “wicked” is a Massachusetts-ism [/QUOTE] You cannot be serious. You don’t really think kids get this from the Boston use of the word “wicked,” do you? ---
**Author:** ![tomndebb](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/b9e5f3/32.png) [@tomndebb](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tomndebb)\ **Post date:** [September 24, 2006, 6:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/it-is-upon-us-my-daughter-is-using-bad-language/373914/52 "2006-09-24T18:23:59Z")
[QUOTE=RickJay] You cannot be serious. You don’t really think kids get this from the Boston use of the word “wicked,” do you? [/QUOTE] Given that his child currently lives in metro Boston and appears to be a bit young to have been exposed to Harry Potter or similar dangerous cultural influences, I suspect that that is exactly what he (correctly) thinks. ---
**Author:** ![DianaG](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/7ab992/32.png) [@DianaG](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DianaG)\ **Post date:** [September 24, 2006, 6:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/it-is-upon-us-my-daughter-is-using-bad-language/373914/53 "2006-09-24T18:28:15Z")
While it’s certainly not exclusive to Boston, it certainly is endemic here. But hey, at least so far she’s not saying things are “wicked pissah!” ---
**Author:** ![2lazy2pee](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/2/4bbf92/32.png) [@2lazy2pee](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/2lazy2pee)\ **Post date:** [September 24, 2006, 8:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/it-is-upon-us-my-daughter-is-using-bad-language/373914/54 "2006-09-24T20:00:00Z")
[QUOTE=teela brown] \ I believe “dude” emerged from surfer culture (cue Jeff Lebowski), but I never heard the word “hecka” since I worked at this office. Where did that one come from? [/QUOTE] I dunno. I’ve been saying “dude” for over 35 years or so. In my case, I’d say it comes from “All the Young Dudes” by Mott the Hoople. In which case, blame David Bowie for composing the song. ---
**Author:** ![Rilchiam](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/2bfe46/32.png) [@Rilchiam](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rilchiam)\ **Post date:** [September 24, 2006, 9:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/it-is-upon-us-my-daughter-is-using-bad-language/373914/55 "2006-09-24T21:12:35Z")
[QUOTE=Shagnasty] My writing style (and my speaking style even) tends to whoosh some people badly and those that don’t get it tend to hate me. [/quote] **Shag** , the “I’m so precious no one understands me” defense does not fly around here. > [@](#): > > Using the word wicked in the rest of the English speaking world will get you mocking laughs at best. I have never heard anyone get laughed at for saying “wicked”. I’ve never heard anyone get laughed at for saying “y’all.” Or “dude”. Or “dahn-tahn”. Unless the person doing the laughing was the ignorant one. **Shag** , this is a very diverse country. There’s room for, and tolerance of, all types of people. The problem is **you**. You put way too much emphasis on artificial constructs, judging other people and fearing being judged. Nobody cares about this stuff except you. Don’t inflict it on your daughter. Now I’m going off to order milk in a bar. What was it you said about that? Off-the-wall, anti-social behavior? You really thought that? You are a sad, strange little man. ---
**Author:** ![elfkin477](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/a9a28c/32.png) [@elfkin477](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/elfkin477)\ **Post date:** [September 24, 2006, 9:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/it-is-upon-us-my-daughter-is-using-bad-language/373914/56 "2006-09-24T21:24:00Z")
[QUOTE=tomndebb] Given that his child currently lives in metro Boston and appears to be a bit young to have been exposed to Harry Potter or similar dangerous cultural influences, I suspect that that is exactly what he (correctly) thinks. [/QUOTE] The way Brits use wicked is **not** the same as how New Englanders use it anyway. They seem to mean something like “cool!” not “very/really.” I found a wicked neat site last night just after I posted a reply. It takes a story and has people from around the world tell it. This is the [New Hampshire version](http://www.lowlands-l.net/anniversary/newhampshire.php), which is as close to MA as you’ll find there. The accent is thicker than I’m used to, and certainly thicker than mine (I’ll cop to “theyah” and the occasional “doh-ah” but a lot of my R words end in R), but there’s something comfortingly familiar about it anyway. OTOH, I have no idea what “joe-jeezly” means, and have never heard anyone say “some wicked,” “yowens,” or “some good.” The speaker’s obviously significantly older than I am, though. After you listen, if you’d like to hear other readers from elsewhere, click on **Look, listen, learn!** under language lists. They’re looking for more readers, too. ---
**Author:** ![tomndebb](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/b9e5f3/32.png) [@tomndebb](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tomndebb)\ **Post date:** [September 24, 2006, 9:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/it-is-upon-us-my-daughter-is-using-bad-language/373914/57 "2006-09-24T21:25:05Z")
[QUOTE=2lazy2pee] [Quote=teela brown] \ I believe “dude” emerged from surfer culture (cue Jeff Lebowski), but I never heard the word “hecka” since I worked at this office. Where did that one come from? [/quote] I dunno. I’ve been saying “dude” for over 35 years or so. In my case, I’d say it comes from “All the Young Dudes” by Mott the Hoople. In which case, blame David Bowie for composing the song. [/QUOTE] Well, clearly Lebowski is a serious latecomer to the matter, but Bowie, 35 (34?) years ago, almost certainly _was_ tying into the surfer culture (that had already been using the word for around a decade by that point.) Those of us among the ancients recall the consternation of our elders when “dude” changed from being a mildly derogatory word for a dilletante (particularly a fish-out-of-water effete type attempting to engage in rugged activities) to simply a reference to any (at that time male) acquaintance, replacing “guy” in some contexts and “buddy” in others. ---
**Author:** ![jayjay](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jayjay/32/6765_2.png) [@jayjay](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jayjay)\ **Post date:** [September 24, 2006, 10:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/it-is-upon-us-my-daughter-is-using-bad-language/373914/58 "2006-09-24T22:01:52Z")
[QUOTE=Frosted Glass] Yinz taking this too seriously. [/QUOTE] There we go. I grew up in Altoona, well within the Piksburgh sphere of language influence. I’ve lived in Lancaster for three years, lived in Minneapolis for two, lived in West Virginia for 1, lived in Wilkes-Barre for two. I still can’t get rid of “yinz”. Or “slippy”. ---
**Author:** ![Guinastasia](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/guinastasia/32/5751_2.png) [@Guinastasia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Guinastasia)\ **Post date:** [September 24, 2006, 10:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/it-is-upon-us-my-daughter-is-using-bad-language/373914/59 "2006-09-24T22:18:53Z")
[QUOTE=Rilchiam] **Shag** , the “I’m so precious no one understands me” defense does not fly around here. I have never heard anyone get laughed at for saying “wicked”. I’ve never heard anyone get laughed at for saying “y’all.” Or “dude”. Or “dahn-tahn”. Unless the person doing the laughing was the ignorant one. **Shag** , this is a very diverse country. There’s room for, and tolerance of, all types of people. The problem is **you**. You put way too much emphasis on artificial constructs, judging other people and fearing being judged. Nobody cares about this stuff except you. Don’t inflict it on your daughter. Now I’m going off to order milk in a bar. What was it you said about that? Off-the-wall, anti-social behavior? You really thought that? You are a sad, strange little man. [/QUOTE] _clap clap clap_ Bravo. **Shagnasty** , get over it. Life is far too short to worry about stupid shit like this. Many parents would give half of their lives to have these kinds of problems. And hey, sometimes regional accents can be an asset-just as Myron Cope! ---
**Author:** ![thirdwarning](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/ecccb3/32.png) [@thirdwarning](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/thirdwarning)\ **Post date:** [September 24, 2006, 10:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/it-is-upon-us-my-daughter-is-using-bad-language/373914/60 "2006-09-24T22:19:04Z")
**Shagnasty** , don’t fret it, son. Casual, slang, and even stupid will come home with your little one from now on. The best you can do is to try to stem the tide a bit. As I think you should do. There’s nothing wrong with letting your kids know that there are better ways to do things. It’s kind of like teaching them table manners. I seriously doubt you’re stabbing her with a fork to help her learn. Really, I can’t count the number of times I’ve had to remind my cherubs, “You didn’t grow up on the Sout’ Side/in Cabrini Green/in the inner city,” depending on which particular silly thing was coming out of their mouths at the time. I don’t play speech police all the time, but they do know that some things aren’t going to make them look better in the wide world. Just like my brother didn’t want his daughter eating with her belt knife at the prom, so he started setting her a better example when she was small. Oh, and please don’t change your style. I thought your story was both fun and funny, and some people just don’t have much of a sense of humor. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/it-is-upon-us-my-daughter-is-using-bad-language/373914.md?page=2) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/it-is-upon-us-my-daughter-is-using-bad-language/373914.md?page=4)