# It looks like I am going to be homeless and unemployed **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [April 10, 2014, 4:45am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/it-looks-like-i-am-going-to-be-homeless-and-unemployed/685780 "2014-04-10T04:45:56Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![Imasquare](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/5f9b8f/32.png) [@Imasquare](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Imasquare)\ **Post date:** [April 11, 2014, 7:52am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/it-looks-like-i-am-going-to-be-homeless-and-unemployed/685780/41 "2014-04-11T07:52:40Z")
> [@Charlie\_Wayne](#): > > Aren’t those benefits extremely limited? Don’t they only run for a few weeks or months? In Australia they run for as long as you need them providing you can demonstrate that you are looking for work. ---
**Author:** ![Imasquare](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/5f9b8f/32.png) [@Imasquare](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Imasquare)\ **Post date:** [April 11, 2014, 7:54am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/it-looks-like-i-am-going-to-be-homeless-and-unemployed/685780/42 "2014-04-11T07:54:37Z")
> [@delsina363](#): > > Hi there, I really do not have any advice that has already been given. I just want you to know, I feel for you. I was once homeless and hungry in my late teens. Only a few months, but that experience has scarred me. I really hope you can find some help. I wish there were something I could do for you, but know you are in my thoughts. I wish you all the best. Thank you, I really appreciate that. I feel optimistic and confident that things will work out. I may have a couple of rough months though. ---
**Author:** ![Imasquare](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/5f9b8f/32.png) [@Imasquare](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Imasquare)\ **Post date:** [April 11, 2014, 7:56am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/it-looks-like-i-am-going-to-be-homeless-and-unemployed/685780/43 "2014-04-11T07:56:11Z")
> [@Steophan](#): > > It’s treatable much as all anxiety issues are, with a combination of medication and CBT, the details and proportions of which will need to be worked out with medical professionals. “Easily treatable” doesn’t mean “easily cured”, but there exist a number of well known and commonly effective treatments. If the OP has access to these treatments, and hasn’t tried them, that should be something he does as soon as is practical. I don’t know enough about the Australian health care system to know how soon that will be, but if it’s more like the UK (where I’m currently receiving treatment for anxiety, among other things) it should be quick and cheap/free. Medicare in Australia is similar to the NHS. I currently see a psychiatrist every three months who basically gives me repeat prescriptions and has a chat about how things are going. ---
**Author:** ![Imasquare](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/5f9b8f/32.png) [@Imasquare](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Imasquare)\ **Post date:** [April 11, 2014, 8:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/it-looks-like-i-am-going-to-be-homeless-and-unemployed/685780/44 "2014-04-11T08:00:01Z")
> [@nevadaexile](#): > > OP, while I’m not religious myself I do know that a number of them work with people who are down on their luck. They can easily find you a small room or apartment to live although it’s not going to be as familiar as your current surroundings. You should contact them ASAP. > > Also, I’m curious as well as at what you have been doing with your money. If you experience social anxiety and you live in a nation which pays for health care as well as living in your sister’s home, you should have been able to save a considerable amount of money. Even with a low wage job, you should have been to save at least enough to pay the rent at an apartment for 3-6 months, if not more. Where has your money been going? I’ve been trying to help my friends stay solvent. See my reply to epbrown01. > [@nevadaexile](#): > > Look…your sister doesn’t have to allow you to live in her home. That she has for the length of time that she did is an indicator that she cares for you. Now you have to begin to care for yourself. Sorry if that sounds cold, but at least she didn’t toss you out in the streets. Yes. I’m not blaming my sister or anyone else. I am in my situation due to my own poor choices. ---
**Author:** ![Imasquare](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/5f9b8f/32.png) [@Imasquare](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Imasquare)\ **Post date:** [April 11, 2014, 8:05am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/it-looks-like-i-am-going-to-be-homeless-and-unemployed/685780/45 "2014-04-11T08:05:05Z")
> [@Duckster](#): > > [Your mother knew Ben](http://www.brainyquote.com/quotes/quotes/b/benjaminfr151622.html)?? > > Australia is known for having families with multiple generations on the dole, never having worked all their lives. It was that way when I was living there. There may be some of that going on but I don’t know how they do it. To receive the dole the applicant has to submit a log of names and phone numbers for jobs they have applied for. I think it’s a minimum of twelve every 2 weeks. If they still are not able to find a job they have to attend training at Centrelink offices where they are shown how to construct a resume, use the internet to look for jobs and also apply for jobs while there. And considering how low the dole payment is I don’t know why anyone who is capable of working would want to claim the dole instead. Rent for a 1 bedroom apartment in suburban Sydney is more than the dole pays. ---
**Author:** ![Imasquare](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/5f9b8f/32.png) [@Imasquare](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Imasquare)\ **Post date:** [April 11, 2014, 8:08am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/it-looks-like-i-am-going-to-be-homeless-and-unemployed/685780/46 "2014-04-11T08:08:13Z")
> [@sisu](#): > > Not in Australia mate, you can stay on the dole for years. > Also you should probably qualify for a redundancy payment if your job is being made redundant which it sounds like it is. Speak to the workplace ombudsmen or a job counselling service, this is about 4 - 6 weeks pay per year of service for most people (depends on award or if you are an employee or contractor) > > $300 a week plus rent assistance, free medical, cheap public transport etc could easily get you a nice room somewhere. Get down to Centrelink mate and look at all options, there are tons out there and there are really no reasons that you should be homeless for extended period unless that is your desire. If we can find places for drugged up single parents they should be able to help you. > > The issue of mental illness is the big thing here, see your doctor and you can get a referral to psychologist for 12 FREE visits and this can be extended if required. Best thing I ever did! > > Oh and your sister has asked for a timeline, she hasn’t kicked you out now. Ask if she can help you with Centrelink to help you with the whole anxiety thing, if she can’t get down to salvos or similar. > > Shit mate it sucks but it’s life. I do appreciate the advice but a room means sharing with strangers. Social phobia makes sharing with strangers a fate worse than sleeping in my car. ---
**Author:** ![sandra\_nz](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/eada6e/32.png) [@sandra\_nz](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/sandra_nz)\ **Post date:** [April 11, 2014, 8:46am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/it-looks-like-i-am-going-to-be-homeless-and-unemployed/685780/47 "2014-04-11T08:46:35Z")
I don’t understand why you feel your only options are living with your sister’s family or out of your car. Where in Australia are you? If you don’t want to rent a flat with multiple tenants, there are still options like bedsits which are cheap and allow you to live on your own. There are also social services you can reach out to. It sounds to me like you don’t just have social anxiety, but you are depressed and unable to think through this logically. Yes, it’s not a nice situation you are in, but you are making it worse by declaring yourself homeless when there are other options available to you. And someone who, at the age of 52, does not have any assets of their own, should not be ‘helping’ friends who acted fraudulently. That doesn’t make you a good friend or even a good person, that just makes you a sucker. Sorry if that sounds harsh, but I think you need to hear it. ---
**Author:** ![madrabbitwoman](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/c37758/32.png) [@madrabbitwoman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/madrabbitwoman)\ **Post date:** [April 11, 2014, 9:01am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/it-looks-like-i-am-going-to-be-homeless-and-unemployed/685780/48 "2014-04-11T09:01:14Z")
Ok you have access to the internet - do some research on homelessness/homelessness prevention services in you area. You may be able to access help from them but start now. Salvos or Vinnies are a good start but perhaps trying to access a psychiatric service like St Lukes, Brotherhood of St Lawrence may be better. I really don’t know what is available in your area but there are resources for preventing homelessness, psychiatric issues and homelessness and a whole heap of other stuff not just shelters out there. I speak from experience. ---
**Author:** ![Telemark](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/telemark/32/372_2.png) [@Telemark](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Telemark)\ **Post date:** [April 11, 2014, 12:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/it-looks-like-i-am-going-to-be-homeless-and-unemployed/685780/49 "2014-04-11T12:34:21Z")
> [@Imasquare](#): > > You are correct in my not having any money. I have been propping up the only friends I have for the last few years. When my income stops and I can no longer help them they will lose their business and their home. They made a really big mistake by cheating the tax man a few years ago and it has cost them their original business and over $20 million dollars in assets. But they are my friends and I wanted to try and keep them going. That’s where my money has been going. This has to stop. They are your friends, but you have an obligation to take care of yourself as well. It’s not your fault that they are in the position they are in, you shouldn’t be suffering the consequences for their actions. Why should they AND you be homeless? ---
**Author:** ![nevadaexile](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/eb8c5e/32.png) [@nevadaexile](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/nevadaexile)\ **Post date:** [April 11, 2014, 1:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/it-looks-like-i-am-going-to-be-homeless-and-unemployed/685780/50 "2014-04-11T13:23:34Z")
> [@Imasquare](#): > > I’ve been trying to help my friends stay solvent. See my reply to epbrown01. > > Yes. I’m not blaming my sister or anyone else. I am in my situation due to my own poor choices. That’s a really dumb idea,OP. If they are financially irresponsible, then you aren’t “helping them”: They are taking advantage of you. I have no doubt that your sister has told this and you either ignored her or you are simply refusing to listen. It’s probable that your “friends” will no longer have any dealings with you the moment they find that your largesse is no longer possible. Frankly, I’m surprised that your sister didn’t either kick you out sooner or have a court declare you incompetent as you seemingly are unable to recognize that you are being exploited. Any other details that you care to add to your tale of woe? If you had stated this earlier then it’s certain that people would have given you other answers. ---
**Author:** ![Steophan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/steophan/32/9595_2.png) [@Steophan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Steophan)\ **Post date:** [April 11, 2014, 1:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/it-looks-like-i-am-going-to-be-homeless-and-unemployed/685780/51 "2014-04-11T13:45:18Z")
> [@Imasquare](#): > > Medicare in Australia is similar to the NHS. I currently see a psychiatrist every three months who basically gives me repeat prescriptions and has a chat about how things are going. Based on this and your other replies, I would think that seeing them again as soon as possible would be a priority, as the change in your circumstances may well change your mental state and your treatment needs. I’ll also say that there’s a fine line between preparing for the worst, and being so pessimistic that you make the worst outcome a foregone conclusion, and you seem close to crossing that line. That would perhaps be something to discuss with the psychiatrist as well. I hope things work out for you. ---
**Author:** ![Dangerosa](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/22d042/32.png) [@Dangerosa](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dangerosa)\ **Post date:** [April 11, 2014, 2:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/it-looks-like-i-am-going-to-be-homeless-and-unemployed/685780/52 "2014-04-11T14:35:54Z")
> [@nevadaexile](#): > > That’s a really dumb idea,OP. > > If they are financially irresponsible, then you aren’t “helping them”: They are taking advantage of you. I have no doubt that your sister has told this and you either ignored her or you are simply refusing to listen. > > It’s probable that your “friends” will no longer have any dealings with you the moment they find that your largesse is no longer possible. Frankly, I’m surprised that your sister didn’t either kick you out sooner or have a court declare you incompetent as you seemingly are unable to recognize that you are being exploited. > > Any other details that you care to add to your tale of woe? If you had stated this earlier then it’s certain that people would have given you other answers. Not only taking advantage of you, but taking advantage of your sister - who has been helping support you so you can keep them solvent. In other words, you have been taking resources from your sister that she could use to improve her own life or that of her children for the sake of people who cheated the tax man out of $20M! No kidding you made your own choices. ---
**Author:** ![Tangent](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tangent/32/3098_2.png) [@Tangent](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tangent)\ **Post date:** [April 11, 2014, 4:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/it-looks-like-i-am-going-to-be-homeless-and-unemployed/685780/53 "2014-04-11T16:56:37Z")
> [@Charlie\_Wayne](#): > > The following are some matters that caused my BIL to complain to my sister when I visited her. I’m talking about a visit that lasted for just 2 or 3 hours. He complained to her behind my back but smiled at me and welcomed me to my face. > > Do you engage in any habits that they might consider objectionable? Specifically, drinking, smoking, any form of drug usage? (even extremely mild usage, including prescription drugs). > > Have you had any interaction with their children that they could view as objectionable? Even though you can’t imagine it being objectionable? > > Are the hours you keep markedly different from theirs? Would that create a source of conflict for them or their children? > > Do you clean up after yourself? One of the most common reasons why a houseguest wears out their welcome is because they leave dirty dishes for the lady of the house to clean up. Substitute “dirty dishes” for “dirty laundry” or just about anything else that would require your sister to clean up. > > Basically, do you do anything that causes your sister to do any work that she would not have to do if you weren’t there? > > Finally, have you broken anything in their home? Have they complained to you about anything that you’ve done that cost them money or caused them any extra work? Any reason at all that would cause them to resent your presence? Wow, that must have been a helluva 3 hour visit with your sister! :eek: ---
**Author:** ![Superhal](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/b4bc9f/32.png) [@Superhal](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Superhal)\ **Post date:** [April 11, 2014, 6:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/it-looks-like-i-am-going-to-be-homeless-and-unemployed/685780/54 "2014-04-11T18:05:31Z")
My advice is based on Yoda’s “Try not, Do; or Do not” saying. Another expression: Whether you believe you “can” or “can’t” do something, it will come true. It seems to me you have an excuse for everything. You can’t get a job because you can’t do interviews because you can’t get interviews because you can’t talk on the phone because you have a social disorder. Also, you can’t live with your sister because THEY’re weary of you. What did you do to make yourself wanted? The number one situation I see this is math. I say, math is easy. They say, “they can’t do math.” If you think you can’t do math, you never will. If you stop thinking “can’t,” then at least you will try. Once you try, it is possible. Until you try, it is truly impossible. There’s tons of books on how to deal with interviews. How many have you read? Do you own even one? I have one from a job search 10 years ago. How many jobs are you applying to per week? Are you applying to those at the top of your abilities or at the bottom? My coworker’s daughter, within months of getting her BA, got a job as president of a company. Let’s say you were a professional boxer. How would you win a match? Wait for the other guy to fall over? If you were a salesman, would you wait for customers to come to you? If you were a racecar driver, would you retire after your first crash? Try this: pick something you’re not good at, and try it for a week. It might be something like parallel parking. Let’s say you fail a few times. Then what do you do? I’ll tell you what you do: learn how to do it better. Look in the library, look on the Internet, watch videos and ask people. Then, practice like crazy. Get out of your car and check. If you aren’t within 2 inches of the curb, do it again. And again. And again. After one week, surprise: you’ll be able to do it better than the week before. All because you tried. ---
**Author:** ![Fear\_Itself](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/fear_itself/32/19637_2.png) [@Fear\_Itself](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Fear_Itself)\ **Post date:** [April 11, 2014, 6:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/it-looks-like-i-am-going-to-be-homeless-and-unemployed/685780/55 "2014-04-11T18:15:58Z")
“A man has got to know his limitations.” _~~Josey Wales_ So long as we are spouting trite aphorisms. ---
**Author:** ![terentii](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/terentii/32/212_2.png) [@terentii](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/terentii)\ **Post date:** [April 11, 2014, 9:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/it-looks-like-i-am-going-to-be-homeless-and-unemployed/685780/56 "2014-04-11T21:07:30Z")
Forgive me if I missed this above, but what marketable skills do you possess? I don’t like working in an office environment either, but I’ve always been able to find work in one field or another (broadcasting, publishing, education) with my language skills (native and foreign). I currently edit scientific journals on-line (i.e., telecommute). ---
**Author:** ![terentii](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/terentii/32/212_2.png) [@terentii](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/terentii)\ **Post date:** [April 11, 2014, 9:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/it-looks-like-i-am-going-to-be-homeless-and-unemployed/685780/57 "2014-04-11T21:09:07Z")
> [@Fear\_Itself](#): > > “A man has got to know his limitations.” _~~Josey Wales_ I thought it was Harry Callahan? 😕 :dubious: ---
**Author:** ![Fear\_Itself](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/fear_itself/32/19637_2.png) [@Fear\_Itself](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Fear_Itself)\ **Post date:** [April 11, 2014, 9:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/it-looks-like-i-am-going-to-be-homeless-and-unemployed/685780/58 "2014-04-11T21:11:06Z")
> [@terentii](#): > > I thought it was Harry Callahan? 😕 :dubious: Right you are! I discombobulated my Eastwood quotes. ---
**Author:** ![nevadaexile](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/eb8c5e/32.png) [@nevadaexile](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/nevadaexile)\ **Post date:** [April 11, 2014, 9:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/it-looks-like-i-am-going-to-be-homeless-and-unemployed/685780/59 "2014-04-11T21:11:23Z")
> [@Fear\_Itself](#): > > “A man has got to know his limitations.” _~~Josey Wales_ > > So long as we are spouting trite aphorisms. Actually, **Harry Callaghan** said that. Same actor. Different film series. Got ninja’d. ---
**Author:** ![Imasquare](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/5f9b8f/32.png) [@Imasquare](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Imasquare)\ **Post date:** [April 14, 2014, 3:03am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/it-looks-like-i-am-going-to-be-homeless-and-unemployed/685780/60 "2014-04-14T03:03:45Z")
> [@Dangerosa](#): > > Not only taking advantage of you, but taking advantage of your sister - who has been helping support you so you can keep them solvent. In other words, you have been taking resources from your sister that she could use to improve her own life or that of her children for the sake of people who cheated the tax man out of $20M! > > No kidding you made your own choices. I pay my sister to stay there. I provide my own food. They didn’t cheat the tax man out of $20 million dollars. It was somewhere around $300,000. These people saved me once several years ago so I am not going to abandon them. Because one of them was charged with fraud their bank decided it didn’t want to do business with them any more and called in their loans payable immediately. They couldn’t pay immediately so the bank placed their business in receivership and it and all assets owned by the business were sold. The receivers the bank appointed to run the business before it was sold charged exorbitant fees per day which were taken from the proceeds of funds realised from the sale of the business. It took them quite a while to sell that business and all assets. That as well as legal fees - the barrister charged $2,000 per day and charged a full day even if he only spent a couple of hours on their case - ate up most of what was left over from the sale. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/it-looks-like-i-am-going-to-be-homeless-and-unemployed/685780.md?page=2) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/it-looks-like-i-am-going-to-be-homeless-and-unemployed/685780.md?page=4)