# It Took the Mortician 2 Hours to Remove the Smile From the Deceased's Face **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [February 28, 2009, 3:30am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/it-took-the-mortician-2-hours-to-remove-the-smile-from-the-deceaseds-face/487757 "2009-02-28T03:30:14Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Tuckerfan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/eada6e/32.png) [@Tuckerfan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tuckerfan)\ **Post date:** [February 28, 2009, 3:30am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/it-took-the-mortician-2-hours-to-remove-the-smile-from-the-deceaseds-face/487757/1 "2009-02-28T03:30:14Z")
[What a way to go, baby!](http://www.ktla.com/landing_mostinteresting/?Man-Dies-After-12-hour-Viagra-fueled-Org=1&blockID=225251&feedID=1080) > [@](#): > > He won the bet, but lost his life. > > Police say 2 women bet their friend Sergey Tuganov that he couldn’t keep up with them during a 12-hour sex marathon. > > The prize, $4,300. > > Tuganov took the bet and decided to boost his chances of winning by downing a bottle of Viagra. > > It worked. He won the wager. > > But just minutes later, the 28-year-old mechanic died of a heart attack, Moscow police said. I’m sure that **QtM** or one of our other medical Dopers will show up to make some kind of downer post, but _really_, if you’re gonna go, I can’t think of a _better_ way to go! 😃 ---
**Author:** ![running\_coach](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/running_coach/32/15836_2.png) [@running\_coach](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/running_coach)\ **Post date:** [February 28, 2009, 3:40am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/it-took-the-mortician-2-hours-to-remove-the-smile-from-the-deceaseds-face/487757/2 "2009-02-28T03:40:09Z")
Probably won’t be able to close the coffin lid, either. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![friedo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/8edcca/32.png) [@friedo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/friedo)\ **Post date:** [February 28, 2009, 3:55am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/it-took-the-mortician-2-hours-to-remove-the-smile-from-the-deceaseds-face/487757/3 "2009-02-28T03:55:49Z")
There once was a man named Tuganov Who was tired of having to tug it off So he made a nice wager With two beauties major And died with a loaded Kalishnikov. ---
**Author:** ![Larry\_Mudd](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/f14d63/32.png) [@Larry\_Mudd](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Larry_Mudd)\ **Post date:** [February 28, 2009, 4:04am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/it-took-the-mortician-2-hours-to-remove-the-smile-from-the-deceaseds-face/487757/4 "2009-02-28T04:04:03Z")
Viagra comes in bottles in Russia? ---
**Author:** ![Robot\_Arm](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/robot_arm/32/18280_2.png) [@Robot\_Arm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Robot_Arm)\ **Post date:** [February 28, 2009, 4:25am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/it-took-the-mortician-2-hours-to-remove-the-smile-from-the-deceaseds-face/487757/5 "2009-02-28T04:25:53Z")
> [@Larry\_Mudd](#): > > Viagra comes in bottles in Russia? Yes, but he forgot that Russia uses 220mg tablets. ---
**Author:** ![Little\_Nemo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/little_nemo/32/3120_2.png) [@Little\_Nemo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Little_Nemo)\ **Post date:** [February 28, 2009, 4:37am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/it-took-the-mortician-2-hours-to-remove-the-smile-from-the-deceaseds-face/487757/6 "2009-02-28T04:37:20Z")
Lucky stiff ---
**Author:** ![Johnny\_L.A](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/johnny_l.a/32/1084_2.png) [@Johnny\_L.A](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Johnny_L.A)\ **Post date:** [February 28, 2009, 5:07am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/it-took-the-mortician-2-hours-to-remove-the-smile-from-the-deceaseds-face/487757/7 "2009-02-28T05:07:57Z")
> [@Larry\_Mudd](#): > > Viagra comes in bottles in Russia? Tuganov came in pints. ---
**Author:** ![Khampelf](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/8e7dd6/32.png) [@Khampelf](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Khampelf)\ **Post date:** [February 28, 2009, 6:12am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/it-took-the-mortician-2-hours-to-remove-the-smile-from-the-deceaseds-face/487757/8 "2009-02-28T06:12:21Z")
I’ve read that a cardiac arrest is likely to occur just before orgasm, not after. Kind of a rip-off, really. Imagine being just about to come, straining for it a bit, and blammo! heart goes out. Bummer. ☹ ---
**Author:** ![Cyberhwk](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/7993a0/32.png) [@Cyberhwk](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cyberhwk)\ **Post date:** [February 28, 2009, 8:43am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/it-took-the-mortician-2-hours-to-remove-the-smile-from-the-deceaseds-face/487757/9 "2009-02-28T08:43:16Z")
In Soviet Russia…bah…can’t do it… ---
**Author:** ![KarlGrenze](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/dbc845/32.png) [@KarlGrenze](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/KarlGrenze)\ **Post date:** [February 28, 2009, 1:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/it-took-the-mortician-2-hours-to-remove-the-smile-from-the-deceaseds-face/487757/10 "2009-02-28T13:01:30Z")
☹ Am I the only one thinking about his partners? I’d feel awful if my partner dies while having sex (or shortly after). ---
**Author:** ![An\_Arky](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/87869e/32.png) [@An\_Arky](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/An_Arky)\ **Post date:** [February 28, 2009, 1:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/it-took-the-mortician-2-hours-to-remove-the-smile-from-the-deceaseds-face/487757/11 "2009-02-28T13:22:00Z")
Well, I’m thinking about his partners, just not in that way. ---
**Author:** ![FriarTed](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/friarted/32/1052_2.png) [@FriarTed](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/FriarTed)\ **Post date:** [February 28, 2009, 1:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/it-took-the-mortician-2-hours-to-remove-the-smile-from-the-deceaseds-face/487757/12 "2009-02-28T13:29:53Z")
> [@friedo](#): > > There once was a man named Tuganov > Who was tired of having to tug it off > So he made a nice wager > With two beauties major > And died with a loaded Kalishnikov. Since no one else will… Bravo! ---
**Author:** ![Kent\_Clark](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kent_clark/32/105_2.png) [@Kent\_Clark](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kent_Clark)\ **Post date:** [March 1, 2009, 3:09am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/it-took-the-mortician-2-hours-to-remove-the-smile-from-the-deceaseds-face/487757/13 "2009-03-01T03:09:18Z")
> [@KarlGrenze](#): > > ☹ Am I the only one thinking about his partners? I’d feel awful if my partner dies while having sex (or shortly after). [QUOTE=OP] Police say 2 women bet their friend Sergey Tuganov that he couldn’t keep up with them during a 12-hour sex marathon. The prize, $4,300. [/QUOTE] For some reason I don’t think there was a strong emotional connection there. ---
**Author:** ![Bosstone](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/22d042/32.png) [@Bosstone](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bosstone)\ **Post date:** [March 1, 2009, 3:15am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/it-took-the-mortician-2-hours-to-remove-the-smile-from-the-deceaseds-face/487757/14 "2009-03-01T03:15:34Z")
> [@Cyberhwk](#): > > In Soviet Russia…bah…can’t do it… I can. Viagra takes YOU! ---
**Author:** ![Hostile\_Dialect](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/e495f1/32.png) [@Hostile\_Dialect](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hostile_Dialect)\ **Post date:** [March 1, 2009, 3:16am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/it-took-the-mortician-2-hours-to-remove-the-smile-from-the-deceaseds-face/487757/15 "2009-03-01T03:16:22Z")
Sex without a strong emotional connection? That sounds like eternal damnation to me. He’ll have to answer to Almighty Jesus now. Hostile Dialect, Hostile Dialect, Narcissist ---
**Author:** ![JRDelirious](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jrdelirious/32/9531_2.png) [@JRDelirious](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/JRDelirious)\ **Post date:** [March 1, 2009, 3:24am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/it-took-the-mortician-2-hours-to-remove-the-smile-from-the-deceaseds-face/487757/16 "2009-03-01T03:24:11Z")
> [@Hostile\_Dialect](#): > > Sex without a strong emotional connection? That sounds like eternal damnation to me. He’ll have to answer to Almighty Jesus now. > > Hostile Dialect, > Hostile Dialect, Narcissist - “Oh, for Myself’s sake, man… at least have the good taste to have it shrink when facing My Judgment!”\* ---
**Author:** ![Hostile\_Dialect](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/e495f1/32.png) [@Hostile\_Dialect](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hostile_Dialect)\ **Post date:** [March 1, 2009, 3:32am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/it-took-the-mortician-2-hours-to-remove-the-smile-from-the-deceaseds-face/487757/17 "2009-03-01T03:32:27Z")
Gay eternal judgment love? Sounds like we have a Republican National Convention on our hands. Hostile Dialect, Hostile Dialect, Narcissist ---
**Author:** ![RandMcnally](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/b782af/32.png) [@RandMcnally](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RandMcnally)\ **Post date:** [March 1, 2009, 5:53am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/it-took-the-mortician-2-hours-to-remove-the-smile-from-the-deceaseds-face/487757/18 "2009-03-01T05:53:25Z")
I’d be pissed if I died during that. Maybe if I died after knocking them both up, or just after, but not during. ---
**Author:** ![Mighty\_Girl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/7bcc69/32.png) [@Mighty\_Girl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mighty_Girl)\ **Post date:** [March 1, 2009, 7:46am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/it-took-the-mortician-2-hours-to-remove-the-smile-from-the-deceaseds-face/487757/19 "2009-03-01T07:46:56Z")
He didn’t die “during”, he died \*after \*he won the wage, meaning they had sex for 12 hours and then he keeled over. I wonder if they had paid him. ---
**Author:** ![Manduck](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/manduck/32/256_2.png) [@Manduck](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Manduck)\ **Post date:** [March 1, 2009, 7:47am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/it-took-the-mortician-2-hours-to-remove-the-smile-from-the-deceaseds-face/487757/20 "2009-03-01T07:47:13Z")
Note to self: change of plan: make that an _11_ hour sex marathon. [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/it-took-the-mortician-2-hours-to-remove-the-smile-from-the-deceaseds-face/487757.md?page=2)