# It would be a pleasure to beat my optometrist to death. **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [June 19, 2009, 3:48am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/it-would-be-a-pleasure-to-beat-my-optometrist-to-death/500269 "2009-06-19T03:48:57Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 11\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![sailor](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/a587f6/32.png) [@sailor](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/sailor)\ **Post date:** [June 20, 2009, 4:22am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/it-would-be-a-pleasure-to-beat-my-optometrist-to-death/500269/41 "2009-06-20T04:22:49Z")
> [@handsomeharry](#): > > “52 years young.” I know how traumatic it must be for you to be at that age when you cannot always please a woman. You have my sympathy. And, no, I have not seen your eyeglasses. ---
**Author:** ![Chief\_Pedant](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/a6a055/32.png) [@Chief\_Pedant](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chief_Pedant)\ **Post date:** [June 20, 2009, 10:26am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/it-would-be-a-pleasure-to-beat-my-optometrist-to-death/500269/42 "2009-06-20T10:26:20Z")
> [@Sunspace](#): > > Annoying and trite _is_ offensive. It is if you are petty enough, anyway. Or eager to take offense where none is intended. I have found such people end up living rather small and huffy lives. ---
**Author:** ![EddyTeddyFreddy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/eddyteddyfreddy/32/18796_2.png) [@EddyTeddyFreddy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/EddyTeddyFreddy)\ **Post date:** [June 20, 2009, 6:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/it-would-be-a-pleasure-to-beat-my-optometrist-to-death/500269/43 "2009-06-20T18:32:28Z")
> [@dropzone](#): > > As part of explaining that I needed bifocals, mine said, “Welcome to your forties.” I did not think to be offended. That wouldn’t offend me, either; it’s a humorous acknowledgment of reality, and one I’ve made, myself. ---
**Author:** ![eclectic\_wench](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/ac91a4/32.png) [@eclectic\_wench](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/eclectic_wench)\ **Post date:** [June 20, 2009, 7:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/it-would-be-a-pleasure-to-beat-my-optometrist-to-death/500269/44 "2009-06-20T19:05:11Z")
‘52 years young’ would make me gag as well. It’s got nothing to do with the age, it’s the cutesy-poo patronising. It implies that a) older is innately worse, and b) anyone over 50 is stupid enough to believe that an itsy-bitsy bit of adorable wordplay will make the bad bad oldness all better. Anyone who would say ‘52 years young’ would probably also call my grandmother ‘we’, like some of the staff at her retirement home do. Who the FUCK is ‘we’, you cretin, and are you seriously so stupid that you haven’t even noticed that my grandmother, in spite of being three or four times your age, is easily twenty times more aware, coherent, thoughtful, sharp-minded and articulate than you are? ---
**Author:** ![Freudian\_Slit](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/5daacb/32.png) [@Freudian\_Slit](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Freudian_Slit)\ **Post date:** [June 20, 2009, 7:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/it-would-be-a-pleasure-to-beat-my-optometrist-to-death/500269/45 "2009-06-20T19:42:02Z")
It sort of reminds me of Pet Sematary, when Louis meets Jud who says something like, “I’m seventy years old” and Louis is glad that the man doesn’t say “Seventy years young” because that’s too cutesy. But I didn’t think people got pissy about it. It’s a little trite. ---
**Author:** ![EddyTeddyFreddy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/eddyteddyfreddy/32/18796_2.png) [@EddyTeddyFreddy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/EddyTeddyFreddy)\ **Post date:** [June 21, 2009, 12:28am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/it-would-be-a-pleasure-to-beat-my-optometrist-to-death/500269/46 "2009-06-21T00:28:40Z")
> [@eclectic\_wench](#): > > ‘52 years young’ would make me gag as well. It’s got nothing to do with the age, it’s the cutesy-poo patronising. It implies that a) older is innately worse, and b) anyone over 50 is stupid enough to believe that an itsy-bitsy bit of adorable wordplay will make the bad bad oldness all better. > > Anyone who would say ‘52 years young’ would probably also call my grandmother ‘we’, like some of the staff at her retirement home do. Who the FUCK is ‘we’, you cretin, and are you seriously so stupid that you haven’t even noticed that my grandmother, in spite of being three or four times your age, is easily twenty times more aware, coherent, thoughtful, sharp-minded and articulate than you are? Well said. You can stay on my lawn all you want. 😉 ---
**Author:** ![Shirley\_Ujest](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/45deac/32.png) [@Shirley\_Ujest](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shirley_Ujest)\ **Post date:** [June 22, 2009, 1:33am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/it-would-be-a-pleasure-to-beat-my-optometrist-to-death/500269/47 "2009-06-22T01:33:02Z")
> [@AuntiePam](#): > > At a doctor appointment in my early 50’s, the nurse took my history and then said “You’re in great shape for someone your age!” WTF? I decided to take it as a compliment. The proper response to any comments like this is usually: " I have underpants older than you!" ---
**Author:** ![Michael\_Ellis](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/977dab/32.png) [@Michael\_Ellis](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Michael_Ellis)\ **Post date:** [June 22, 2009, 1:42am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/it-would-be-a-pleasure-to-beat-my-optometrist-to-death/500269/48 "2009-06-22T01:42:00Z")
Quit whining. ---
**Author:** ![eclectic\_wench](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/ac91a4/32.png) [@eclectic\_wench](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/eclectic_wench)\ **Post date:** [June 23, 2009, 12:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/it-would-be-a-pleasure-to-beat-my-optometrist-to-death/500269/49 "2009-06-23T12:18:35Z")
> [@EddyTeddyFreddy](#): > > Well said. You can stay on my lawn all you want. 😉 COOL. \< breaking out lawn toys \> You like Jarts, right? ---
**Author:** ![gigi](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/a587f6/32.png) [@gigi](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/gigi)\ **Post date:** [June 23, 2009, 1:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/it-would-be-a-pleasure-to-beat-my-optometrist-to-death/500269/50 "2009-06-23T13:50:38Z")
> [@Chief\_Pedant](#): > > Anyway, do you know how you can tell if you are making love to an optometrist? > > ( He keeps asking, “Which is better…this…or this?” ) > > no charge How does an optometrist know he’s with a coprophiliac? She always chooses number two. (thanks **friedo** ) ---
**Author:** ![EddyTeddyFreddy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/eddyteddyfreddy/32/18796_2.png) [@EddyTeddyFreddy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/EddyTeddyFreddy)\ **Post date:** [June 23, 2009, 3:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/it-would-be-a-pleasure-to-beat-my-optometrist-to-death/500269/51 "2009-06-23T15:04:32Z")
> [@eclectic\_wench](#): > > COOL. > > \< breaking out lawn toys \> You like Jarts, right? :eek: You might poke your (or someone else’s) eye out! :eek: [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/it-would-be-a-pleasure-to-beat-my-optometrist-to-death/500269.md?page=2)