# It's been 3 months..... Help with fear **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [February 17, 2016, 4:05am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/its-been-3-months-help-with-fear/746316 "2016-02-17T04:05:33Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 12\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![joyfool](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/df788c/32.png) [@joyfool](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/joyfool)\ **Post date:** [February 19, 2016, 3:04am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/its-been-3-months-help-with-fear/746316/41 "2016-02-19T03:04:52Z")
Thank y’all. Sincerely. And **Damuri** , there is no one. Well, there was, but my grandfather has been dead for 36 years. Hell, even with that, I have no idea if the way she idolizes him was actually for real while he was still alive. That may only be for attention-whoring purposes now. ---
**Author:** ![kambuckta](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/53a042/32.png) [@kambuckta](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kambuckta)\ **Post date:** [February 19, 2016, 4:10am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/its-been-3-months-help-with-fear/746316/42 "2016-02-19T04:10:26Z")
I’m very chuffed to hear that you sound more positive now **faithfool**! All the best, kam. ---
**Author:** ![Try2B\_Comprehensive](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/try2b_comprehensive/32/65_2.png) [@Try2B\_Comprehensive](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Try2B_Comprehensive)\ **Post date:** [February 19, 2016, 5:39am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/its-been-3-months-help-with-fear/746316/43 "2016-02-19T05:39:34Z")
> [@faithfool](#): > > And find some books like that, although I’ve got the former somewhere. Well, the entire Art of Peace is in the link. But yeah, there are other books like that, plenty. Or you could take a look at things from that perspective and just create your own, even if you don’t write it down. These ancient Chinese texts can be a bit awkward after all. ---
**Author:** ![Nava](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/da6949/32.png) [@Nava](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Nava)\ **Post date:** [February 19, 2016, 8:33am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/its-been-3-months-help-with-fear/746316/44 "2016-02-19T08:33:11Z")
Your therapist can even serve as a reference for your cleaning services, now 🙂 and I haven’t met your aunt but I absolutely love her. Yay **Auntfool**! ---
**Author:** ![Grrlbrarian](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/grrlbrarian/32/4048_2.png) [@Grrlbrarian](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Grrlbrarian)\ **Post date:** [February 19, 2016, 4:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/its-been-3-months-help-with-fear/746316/45 "2016-02-19T16:14:27Z")
I’m glad things are looking brighter, **faithfool**. No advice to offer, just sincere wishes that things will improve, especially with Auntfool running interference! {{{hugs}}} ---
**Author:** ![Heart\_of\_Dorkness](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/4bbf92/32.png) [@Heart\_of\_Dorkness](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Heart_of_Dorkness)\ **Post date:** [February 19, 2016, 5:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/its-been-3-months-help-with-fear/746316/46 "2016-02-19T17:27:51Z")
I just wanted to say I’m so happy to hear things are looking up for you. Give a big hug to that awesome aunt! ---
**Author:** ![Dangerosa](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/22d042/32.png) [@Dangerosa](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dangerosa)\ **Post date:** [February 19, 2016, 6:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/its-been-3-months-help-with-fear/746316/47 "2016-02-19T18:15:06Z")
Wonderful to hear. Don’t get discouraged when you have the next down day, cause you’ll have it. It might help to keep your optimistic post to remind yourself there are good days when the next hopeless one hits. (Says the woman who can currently sob and laugh at the same time with no warning - well, can implies I can control it - nope.) ---
**Author:** ![Wednesday\_Evening](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/b2d939/32.png) [@Wednesday\_Evening](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Wednesday_Evening)\ **Post date:** [February 19, 2016, 7:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/its-been-3-months-help-with-fear/746316/48 "2016-02-19T19:55:53Z")
Sorry I don’t have anything helpful to add, but I’m glad to hear the good news. Sending virtual supportive hugs your way. ((hugs)) ---
**Author:** ![Dung\_Beetle](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dung_beetle/32/7945_2.png) [@Dung\_Beetle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dung_Beetle)\ **Post date:** [February 19, 2016, 8:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/its-been-3-months-help-with-fear/746316/49 "2016-02-19T20:01:38Z")
I am so glad, dear. ---
**Author:** ![Count\_Blucher](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/c5a1d2/32.png) [@Count\_Blucher](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Count_Blucher)\ **Post date:** [February 19, 2016, 8:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/its-been-3-months-help-with-fear/746316/50 "2016-02-19T20:10:02Z")
**Faithfool** you have a course set, you have a plan, and you have the momentum. I’d say that right about now, you’re kicking grief’s ass. Well Done!!! 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![joyfool](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/df788c/32.png) [@joyfool](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/joyfool)\ **Post date:** [February 19, 2016, 9:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/its-been-3-months-help-with-fear/746316/51 "2016-02-19T21:45:43Z")
Thank you all, very very much. I’ve felt a lot better in the last day and I am cautiously optimistic. I appreciate everyone encouraging me and for the great advice. PMs will go out today. ---
**Author:** ![Sunny\_Daze](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/sunny_daze/32/438_2.png) [@Sunny\_Daze](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sunny_Daze)\ **Post date:** [February 19, 2016, 11:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/its-been-3-months-help-with-fear/746316/52 "2016-02-19T23:09:40Z")
I’m glad that things are looking up. I also really like your aunt! You’ve been under tremendous pressure for years. Being a caregiver is NOT easy. Add the toll of those years to your recent loss and I think you’re doing fantastically well. Remember, there is no “right” way to grieve. No rule about how long it takes, or what it looks like. Keep asking for help when you need it. We’ll be a cheering section even if we can’t be right there with you. Hugs from California! [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/its-been-3-months-help-with-fear/746316.md?page=2)