# It's been three weeks since my husband died... **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [April 11, 2012, 9:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/its-been-three-weeks-since-my-husband-died/618497 "2012-04-11T21:02:25Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 13\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Stendhal\_Syndrome](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/77aa72/32.png) [@Stendhal\_Syndrome](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Stendhal_Syndrome)\ **Post date:** [April 11, 2012, 9:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/its-been-three-weeks-since-my-husband-died/618497/1 "2012-04-11T21:02:25Z")
I just wanted to come back and say hello to everyone and thank you all for sending happy thoughts and well wishes my way. Jesse’s (gurujulp) memorial service was wonderful and touching. People remembered him and shared their Jesse stories. There was lots of tears and laughter too… How am I? Meh… It’s all still very surreal and raw. I miss him…so very much. Jesse always wanted me to write and start a blog, especially during my pregnancy last year. But I never got around to doing it. Anyway…I finally started writing again. If anyone is interested, it is **storiesforjesse.blogspot.com**. It has been helping me immensely with the grieving process, serving as place where I can “talk” to him. Plus it is also a place where Jesse’s friends and family can continue to remember and celebrate him. A lot of people continue to miss him and think about him fondly. Thanks again to our doper family. ---
**Author:** ![Alice\_The\_Goon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ed8c4c/32.png) [@Alice\_The\_Goon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Alice_The_Goon)\ **Post date:** [April 11, 2012, 9:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/its-been-three-weeks-since-my-husband-died/618497/2 "2012-04-11T21:10:58Z")
I enjoyed reading your blog- it’s abundantly clear to me how much you loved him, so I’m sure it was to him, as well. My wishes for comfort and eventual happiness for you and your daughters. Take good care of yourself. ---
**Author:** ![phreesh](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/9fc29f/32.png) [@phreesh](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/phreesh)\ **Post date:** [April 11, 2012, 10:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/its-been-three-weeks-since-my-husband-died/618497/3 "2012-04-11T22:12:21Z")
Do you think you could start a, “ask a recent widow” thread or would that be a little… heavy right now? In my darker moments, I sometimes think about my wife dying and having to keep our family together. Not a fun thought. My thoughts are with you. ---
**Author:** ![Antigen](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/848f3c/32.png) [@Antigen](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Antigen)\ **Post date:** [April 11, 2012, 10:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/its-been-three-weeks-since-my-husband-died/618497/4 "2012-04-11T22:28:45Z")
Thank you for sharing your blog. You write beautifully. I hope you stick around the SDMB and contribute to this community. I hope the days get easier for you and your family. ---
**Author:** ![Taomist](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/53a042/32.png) [@Taomist](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Taomist)\ **Post date:** [April 11, 2012, 10:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/its-been-three-weeks-since-my-husband-died/618497/5 "2012-04-11T22:41:33Z")
> [@Antigen](#): > > Thank you for sharing your blog. You write beautifully. I hope you stick around the SDMB and contribute to this community. > > I hope the days get easier for you and your family. I can’t say it any better than this. So pretend I wrote it, too. ---
**Author:** ![Missy2U](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/3bc359/32.png) [@Missy2U](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Missy2U)\ **Post date:** [April 11, 2012, 11:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/its-been-three-weeks-since-my-husband-died/618497/6 "2012-04-11T23:28:07Z")
My husband is sitting at the kitchen table and he couldn’t figure out why I just sat on his lap and told him I loved him. Thanks. You reminded me of what is REALLY important. Thank you for that. And I will be following your blog. My deepest sympathy - and gratitude for reminding me today of what is important. Hugs. From a stranger they may not mean much, but they’re heartfelt. 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![rocking\_chair](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/rocking_chair/32/2918_2.png) [@rocking\_chair](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/rocking_chair)\ **Post date:** [April 12, 2012, 12:10am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/its-been-three-weeks-since-my-husband-died/618497/7 "2012-04-12T00:10:03Z")
may his memory be eternal. your blog will ensure that. ---
**Author:** ![Marley23](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/45deac/32.png) [@Marley23](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Marley23)\ **Post date:** [April 12, 2012, 12:35am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/its-been-three-weeks-since-my-husband-died/618497/8 "2012-04-12T00:35:21Z")
You sound like you’re doing about as well as anybody can in these circumstances. I’m very sorry you and your family are going through this. The surreal feeling and the rawness do fade with time, although I don’t think they go away completely, and I think you also start to recover your energy as some more time goes on. I’m trying to think of something useful to say, but mostly I’m just sorry. ---
**Author:** ![Two\_Many\_Cats](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/8dc957/32.png) [@Two\_Many\_Cats](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Two_Many_Cats)\ **Post date:** [April 12, 2012, 12:55am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/its-been-three-weeks-since-my-husband-died/618497/9 "2012-04-12T00:55:51Z")
Take care day by day. That’s all anyone can do. It sounds like you are doing as well as you can, and that you loved him very, very much. ---
**Author:** ![PunditLisa](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/4af34b/32.png) [@PunditLisa](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/PunditLisa)\ **Post date:** [April 12, 2012, 10:54am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/its-been-three-weeks-since-my-husband-died/618497/10 "2012-04-12T10:54:00Z")
I’m so sorry for your pain. Finding an outlet for your grief sounds like a very positive step. Best of luck to you in the coming months. ---
**Author:** ![6ImpossibleThingsB4Breakfast](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/6/e19adc/32.png) [@6ImpossibleThingsB4Breakfast](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/6ImpossibleThingsB4Breakfast)\ **Post date:** [April 12, 2012, 2:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/its-been-three-weeks-since-my-husband-died/618497/11 "2012-04-12T14:58:10Z")
If it were possible to share the pain and release the load, we’d all be doing it. **Stendhal Syndrome** , the best I can offer is, “When you’re going through hell, just keep going.” Good god I admire the way you’re moving through this. Even if it doesn’t feel like it to you. You’re astounding. Acknowledge that for yourself. Not everyone can do what you’re doing. Claim any moment you can where you’re the hero to someone else. And those milliseconds when you’re your own. Take 'em. ---
**Author:** ![Patience\_Jones](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/ec9cab/32.png) [@Patience\_Jones](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Patience_Jones)\ **Post date:** [April 12, 2012, 6:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/its-been-three-weeks-since-my-husband-died/618497/12 "2012-04-12T18:59:22Z")
What a terrible loss. The blog is a lovely idea. My condolences. ---
**Author:** ![wonky](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/wonky/32/393_2.png) [@wonky](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/wonky)\ **Post date:** [April 12, 2012, 7:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/its-been-three-weeks-since-my-husband-died/618497/13 "2012-04-12T19:54:50Z")
A blog is a great idea if it gives you comfort. As with everything right now, don’t let it become more of an obligation than a comfort (something I’m very prone to do). It’s good to hear that you’ve found this outlet.