# It's kind of sad when you think about it. POSSIBLE SPOILERS **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [November 23, 2011, 12:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/its-kind-of-sad-when-you-think-about-it-possible-spoilers/603862 "2011-11-23T12:29:39Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![Don\_Draper](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/b2d939/32.png) [@Don\_Draper](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Don_Draper)\ **Post date:** [November 23, 2011, 5:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/its-kind-of-sad-when-you-think-about-it-possible-spoilers/603862/21 "2011-11-23T17:10:22Z")
I have always imagined a twisted little “extra scene” for the end of **E.T.: the Extra-Terrestrial"** : ending - Eliiot, his brother & sister and all the kids in the neighborhood say goodbye to E.T. The cute li’l alien tells Eliot “I’ll be right here.” and touches his heart. Then he ascends into the UFO, which then ascends into the sky. Cue great big John Williams scoring and very dramatic fadeout. Extra scene - INT. UFO - MOMENTS LATER E.T.: My mission was a complete success! OTHER ALIEN: So you successfully tainted the human specimens with our specially engineered killer virus? E.T.: Yes! Those foolish children actually HID me from adults who were attempting to quarantine me! In the days I spent with them, I was able to pass on the contagion to all the children. Imagine - they actually took me out in a sheet and paraded me around their community during their costume-holiday ritual! EVERY child within a ten mile radius now has the deadly virus! OTHER ALIEN: And within a few revolutions of their planet’s axis, the virus will have spread to all corners of the Earth. Easily two-thirds of their population will be dead in a matter of days! E.T.: And the pitiful few who will survive the plague will be no match for our armada of warships that are currently hiding the other side of the sun. The humans are doomed! The Earth is ours! Mwuah-ha-ha-ha-ha! The E.T.'s all burst into a fit of cackling laughter and Kang & Kodos style waving of their tentacly arms. Fade out. ---
**Author:** ![Freudian\_Slit](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/5daacb/32.png) [@Freudian\_Slit](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Freudian_Slit)\ **Post date:** [November 23, 2011, 5:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/its-kind-of-sad-when-you-think-about-it-possible-spoilers/603862/22 "2011-11-23T17:10:29Z")
> [@Nobody](#): > > Finding Nimo. At the end Marlin, Nimo, and others persuade some sharks that fish are friends, not food. Correct me if I’m wrong, but haven’t the sharks just been persuaded to starve themselves? Actually the sharks in Finding Nemo already thought that eating fish was wrong. I’m not sure what they were eating instead of fish. But Marlin and Dorrie (not Nemo, he’s not in that scene) are found by a shark and taken to a support groups for sharks who don’t want to eat fish. ---
**Author:** ![Death\_of\_Rats](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/a6a055/32.png) [@Death\_of\_Rats](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Death_of_Rats)\ **Post date:** [November 23, 2011, 5:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/its-kind-of-sad-when-you-think-about-it-possible-spoilers/603862/23 "2011-11-23T17:15:37Z")
> [@bup](#): > > Terminator 2 is depressing. > > Since Ahnold destroyed the original chip, the punk kid won’t grow up to be the amazing John Connor who’ll save society. He’ll just remain a punk degenerate and waste his life. No, no. That was Ed Furlong’s \*real \*life. ---
**Author:** ![WordMan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/e8c25b/32.png) [@WordMan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/WordMan)\ **Post date:** [November 23, 2011, 5:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/its-kind-of-sad-when-you-think-about-it-possible-spoilers/603862/24 "2011-11-23T17:33:41Z")
> [@Max\_Torque](#): > > And that’s another thing about **Avatar** … > > When in human history have we discovered something massively valuable in a place populated by low-technology natives, and when the natives put up resistance, we just leave them alone? Never, that’s when. So humanity had one defeat, big deal. The humans will return with more people, more weapons, and pound the Smurfs into blue paste. All the Na’vi have done is delay the inevitable. That was such an obvious big plot hole that I assumed it was the set up for the sequel. Cameron has gone on record saying that all the work to create the tech to enable the movie kinda made a sequel (actually most likely a trilogy) inevitable… ETA: oh, a slight variation on the OP = **The Graduate**. The whole point to the movie is for Dustin Hoffman / Ben to assert himself and grow up a bit, which he does by pursuing Katherine Ross (who wouldn’t?! :)). But when he “rescues” her and they end up in the back of the bus, their “NOW what the heck are we gonna do?!” listless expressions make it clear that “…and they lived happily ever after” is not going to be the neat n’ tidy ending to their story(ies)… ---
**Author:** ![Oy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/bc8723/32.png) [@Oy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Oy)\ **Post date:** [November 23, 2011, 5:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/its-kind-of-sad-when-you-think-about-it-possible-spoilers/603862/25 "2011-11-23T17:41:02Z")
> [@WordMan](#): > > ETA: oh, a slight variation on the OP = **The Graduate**. The whole point to the movie is for Dustin Hoffman / Ben to assert himself and grow up a bit, which he does by pursuing Katherine Ross (who wouldn’t?! :)). But when he “rescues” her and they end up in the back of the bus, their “NOW what the heck are we gonna do?!” listless expressions make it clear that “…and they lived happily ever after” is not going to be the neat n’ tidy ending to their story(ies)… Yeah, I always thought that too. I figure they (separately) both go crawling back to their parents the next day and beg to be forgiven and fed and housed. ---
**Author:** ![lorene](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/65b543/32.png) [@lorene](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lorene)\ **Post date:** [November 23, 2011, 5:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/its-kind-of-sad-when-you-think-about-it-possible-spoilers/603862/26 "2011-11-23T17:47:28Z")
> [@Oy](#): > > Snow White sleeps on her bier, with all the Dwarfs and all the animals having pretty much abandoned any life beyond sitting vigil on her. That’s how badly they want her back. So glory be, Prince Charming gallops up, hops off his horse, kisses the lovely Snow White and… > > Lickety split, less than 30 seconds later, Snow White is on the horse with the prince, galloping off never to return. The animals and Dwarfs are left totally deserted, the center of their lives having left without so much as a backward glance. > > Pissed me right off. :mad: I find it charming that you spoiler-boxed Snow White. But I’ve thought of that, too. A lot of fairy tales have that extremely selfish aspect to them. I guess the ending should really read, “And _some of them_ lived happily ever after.” ---
**Author:** ![RealityChuck](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/realitychuck/32/195_2.png) [@RealityChuck](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RealityChuck)\ **Post date:** [November 23, 2011, 7:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/its-kind-of-sad-when-you-think-about-it-possible-spoilers/603862/27 "2011-11-23T19:45:07Z")
**Close Encounters of the Third Kind**. The ending made you want to scream out, “It’s a cookbook!” ---
**Author:** ![obfusciatrist](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/4af34b/32.png) [@obfusciatrist](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/obfusciatrist)\ **Post date:** [November 23, 2011, 7:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/its-kind-of-sad-when-you-think-about-it-possible-spoilers/603862/28 "2011-11-23T19:51:14Z")
If the aliens said to me “there’s a 50% chance we’re going to eat you, but the only way you’ll ever know is if you get on board” I’d probably still go. ---
**Author:** ![Oy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/bc8723/32.png) [@Oy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Oy)\ **Post date:** [November 23, 2011, 7:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/its-kind-of-sad-when-you-think-about-it-possible-spoilers/603862/29 "2011-11-23T19:54:15Z")
> [@lorene](#): > > I find it charming that you spoiler-boxed Snow White. Ya never know. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![KneadToKnow](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kneadtoknow/32/3999_2.png) [@KneadToKnow](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/KneadToKnow)\ **Post date:** [November 23, 2011, 8:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/its-kind-of-sad-when-you-think-about-it-possible-spoilers/603862/30 "2011-11-23T20:13:08Z")
I recently watched _Splendor in the Grass_, which is a screaming argument for sex education in public schools if ever I saw one, but the ending, which I think was intended to evoke a wistfulness for young love looked back on from adulthood, just makes me think the two main characters are going to be meeting in dingy motels every few months for the rest of their lives. ---
**Author:** ![armedmonkey](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/d6d6ee/32.png) [@armedmonkey](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/armedmonkey)\ **Post date:** [November 23, 2011, 8:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/its-kind-of-sad-when-you-think-about-it-possible-spoilers/603862/31 "2011-11-23T20:19:55Z")
> [@Lord\_Il\_Palazzo](#): > > A couple years ago, someone pointed out to me how depressing the ending is when you look beyond what the movie shows.[/SPOILER] Not just the part you put in a spoiler, but put yourself in Marty’s dad’s shoes. Before you won her heart, your wife was head over heels for this guy in high school named “Calvin”, who mysteriously disappeared. You thought he was out of the picture. Fast forward a few years, and your wife bears you a son… but son of a bitch! That motherfucker looks _exactly_ like that guy Calvin she used to go with! hmmmm… ---
**Author:** ![Sampiro](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/2acd7d/32.png) [@Sampiro](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sampiro)\ **Post date:** [November 23, 2011, 8:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/its-kind-of-sad-when-you-think-about-it-possible-spoilers/603862/32 "2011-11-23T20:23:23Z")
> [@Diceman](#): > > I just watched _Avatar_ on DVD. At the end… > **MAJOR SPOILERS BELOW !!!** > > The humans are forced to leave the planet, except for Jake and two other guys who helped him. Now, Jake is transferred into his Avatar body permanently, so he’s OK, but the other two guys are basically screwed. Humans can’t breath the Pandoran air, so they’re basically going to be under house-arrest, wandering around the mostly-empty base for the rest of their lives. It’s the first of an announced trilogy, so probably not for too long. _Independence Day_- Yeaaa, we beat the bad guys! Of course there’s about a trillion tons of dead mothership just above our atmosphere, and nuclear fallout from the bombs we used on (Dallas? Somewhere in Texas I think), and Og knows how many aliens survived, and most major cities were destroyed, but… we still have Bill Paxton or Bill Pullman, one or the other. ---
**Author:** ![Sampiro](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/2acd7d/32.png) [@Sampiro](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sampiro)\ **Post date:** [November 23, 2011, 8:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/its-kind-of-sad-when-you-think-about-it-possible-spoilers/603862/33 "2011-11-23T20:38:51Z")
> [@heathen\_earthling](#): > > More from Cracked: > [6 Most Depressing Happy Endings in Movie History](http://www.cracked.com/article_16570_the-6-most-depressing-happy-endings-in-movie-history.html) The above mentions **Toy Story 2**. I’d add the origional **Toy Story** as well. The toys revealed themselves to the bully kid. Admittedly he’s not a likeable sort, but it’s worth remembering he was taking out his emotional problems on _inanimate objects_- at least he wasn’t blowing up animals or shooting kids in the eye with BB guns. Now he’s just realized that toys are alive and sentient and capable of confrontation. One of three things will come about: 1- He’ll be a hopeless basket case for the rest of his life, unable to so much as eat a piece of lettuce for terror the lettuce head’s mother will come at him accusing him of murder and plotting revenge. And, in terms of body count, this is the _Best Case Scenario_. 2- He now knows that toys are there and they are watching, and after his initial defeat at their hands he’ll never let that happen again. He will carry out a lifetime vendetta against toys- Buzz and Woody saved a beat up old doll and some army men but they’ve just created the Toy Holocaust as this guy dedicates his life to destroying the little mass produced demons before they grow stronger and more powerful. 3- He’ll figure "I was reserving my greatest fucked-upedness for toys because they’re insentient and inanimate, but now that I’ve learned that they’re neither insentient or inanimate, hell, I might as well move on to animals and then other kids and finally just go full blown serial killer. The only hope for this scenario is that one day he’ll move to Miami and Dexter will catch wise and take him out. (And who’s the Special Guest Serial Killer on _Dexter_ this season? None other than Colin Hanks, the son of Tom- i.e. Tom Hanks made him, just as he did the horror that evolved from the kid next door who only wanted to take out frustration at his impotence in a bad home life on some old junk toys but now takes out men, women, and children in increasingly elaborate ways.) ---
**Author:** ![Johnny\_Q](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/898d66/32.png) [@Johnny\_Q](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Johnny_Q)\ **Post date:** [November 23, 2011, 8:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/its-kind-of-sad-when-you-think-about-it-possible-spoilers/603862/34 "2011-11-23T20:49:01Z")
> [@obfusciatrist](#): > > If the aliens said to me “there’s a 50% chance we’re going to eat you, but the only way you’ll ever know is if you get on board” I’d probably still go. Sort of the Space Alien version of the Dread Pirate Roberts? “I’ll likely eat you tomorrow.” ---
**Author:** ![BigT](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bigt/32/12044_2.png) [@BigT](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BigT)\ **Post date:** [November 23, 2011, 8:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/its-kind-of-sad-when-you-think-about-it-possible-spoilers/603862/35 "2011-11-23T20:55:10Z")
I think you guys are wrong about Back to the Future. We see clearly that time eventually catches up with itself. I think, in a short amount of time, Marty will remember everything from his new life. Since he didn’t intentionally set out to change his dad’s personality, he still would have done the exact same things in the past. This also helps explain why the chicken thing is new to the second movie. His personality is even different. ---
**Author:** ![Sampiro](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/2acd7d/32.png) [@Sampiro](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sampiro)\ **Post date:** [November 23, 2011, 8:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/its-kind-of-sad-when-you-think-about-it-possible-spoilers/603862/36 "2011-11-23T20:57:45Z")
Isaac Bashevis Singer, who wrote _Yentl the Yeshiva Boy_ on which Streisand’s musical _Yentl_ was based, HATED the movie version and particularly it’s happy-ish ending in which Yentl wraps things up with her wife and her boyfriend (who get back together) and heads off to America “singing at the top of her lungs”. [Per Singer](http://www.nytimes.com/books/97/04/27/reviews/streisand-singer.html): > [@](#): > > Why would she decide to go to America? Weren’t there enough yeshivas in Poland or in Lithuania where she could continue to study? Was going to America Miss Streisand’s idea of a happy ending for Yentl? What would Yentl have done in America? Worked in a sweatshop 12 hours a day where there is no time for learning? Would she try to marry a salesman in New York, move to the Bronx or to Brooklyn and rent an apartment with an ice box and a dumbwaiter? ---
**Author:** ![ftg](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ftg/32/2801_2.png) [@ftg](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ftg)\ **Post date:** [November 23, 2011, 9:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/its-kind-of-sad-when-you-think-about-it-possible-spoilers/603862/37 "2011-11-23T21:07:35Z")
The movie _The Family Man_: Nicholas Cage wakes up to find that he’s in an alternate universe where he had married his old flame years earlier and had two kids with her. At the end of the movie, he returns to his original time line. So the two cute kids are dead! Gone. No more. They have ceased to be. I found it incredibly cruel. Alternate universe movies are just plain evil. ---
**Author:** ![Lord\_Il\_Palazzo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/b9e5f3/32.png) [@Lord\_Il\_Palazzo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lord_Il_Palazzo)\ **Post date:** [November 23, 2011, 9:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/its-kind-of-sad-when-you-think-about-it-possible-spoilers/603862/38 "2011-11-23T21:21:14Z")
> [@A Monkey With a Gun](#): > > Not just the part you put in a spoiler, but put yourself in Marty’s dad’s shoes. Before you won her heart, your wife was head over heels for this guy in high school named “Calvin”, who mysteriously disappeared. You thought he was out of the picture. Fast forward a few years, and your wife bears you a son… but son of a bitch! That motherfucker looks _exactly_ like that guy Calvin she used to go with! hmmmm… Wow. I’d never even thought about that. I hope for everyone’s sake that time’s kind of dimmed the memory of exactly what Calvin looks like (Marty never got photographed in the '50s, did he?) > [@BigT](#): > > I think you guys are wrong about Back to the Future. We see clearly that time eventually catches up with itself. I think, in a short amount of time, > > Marty will remember everything from his new life. Since he didn’t intentionally set out to change his dad’s personality, he still would have done the exact same things in the past. This also helps explain why the chicken thing is new to the second movie. His personality is even different. Is there a reason you say that? It’s been years since I’ve seen the movies and even longer since I saw the second and third.[SPoiler]Whether he intended to change his father’s personality, Marty clearly did it, at least giving him a huge boost in the self-confidence department. It only stands to reason that, having this difference in personality, the path of his life was at least somewhat different (but not completely different, as he ends up owning the same house, if I remember correctly.) This different life is one of which Marty has no knowledge and I don’t remember the movies giving any reason to think he was “remembering” any. The Marty who knew those parents was shown at the end of the first movie going back in time and we have no idea what happened to him. Did Marty get called a chicken in the first movie? If not, it seems like it’s just an aspect of his personality that the viewer hadn’t seen before.[/Spoiler] ---
**Author:** ![Inner\_Stickler](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/inner_stickler/32/318_2.png) [@Inner\_Stickler](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Inner_Stickler)\ **Post date:** [November 23, 2011, 9:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/its-kind-of-sad-when-you-think-about-it-possible-spoilers/603862/39 "2011-11-23T21:44:27Z")
> [@Lord\_Il\_Palazzo](#): > > Is there a reason you say that? It’s been years since I’ve seen the movies and even longer since I saw the second and third. Well, in the first movie, Marty and his siblings were slowly disappearing from the picture and the assumption was Marty had until they had all disappeared to right his interference. Really, you’d expect all 3 to disappear from the photo immediately upon Marty’s intrusion on his father and mother’s courtship. (Actually, the photo should disappear as the events that led up to the taking of the photo will not have occurred.) So in a universe that apparently has a ripple effect for changes in chronology, I think his supposition makes as much sense as any. ---
**Author:** ![Sampiro](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/2acd7d/32.png) [@Sampiro](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sampiro)\ **Post date:** [November 23, 2011, 9:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/its-kind-of-sad-when-you-think-about-it-possible-spoilers/603862/40 "2011-11-23T21:49:07Z")
> [@Lord\_Il\_Palazzo](#): > > A couple years ago, someone pointed out to me how depressing the ending of Back to the Future is when you look beyond just what the movie shows. > > The movie’s old enough that I doubt it will matter if I box my spoilers, but I might as well do it anyways. > > [Spoiler]Marty ends up back in 1985 and his formerly loser parents are now “cool” and his family is much happier than they were before he went back in time. The problem is that this isn’t his family any more. Sure they look the same and are genetically identical, but Marty has no shared history with any of these people. His childhood memories are of his loser family, not the new, cool one; he knows literally nothing about the people his family has become. How could he possibly have a normal relationship with any of them? They expect him to know them and he just doesn’t. > > Now look at it from their point of view. Your son comes home one day and suddenly knows nothing about anybody in his family. Sure, Marty remembers their family history (as his time travel only changed things starting with his parents) but he has no actual memories of any of the people he’s known all his life (as far as they know). How long will it be until Marty gets taken to a psychiatrist to figure out what’s suddenly “wrong” with him? > > This was supposed to be a happy ending?[/SPOILER] Cracked also dealt with [horrifying aspects of BTTF](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=z-NEZC2uH-Q). One of my favorite lines (paraphrased) is “So do they ever sit down with their neutered servant Biff and laugh about the time he tried to rape Lorraine?” [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/its-kind-of-sad-when-you-think-about-it-possible-spoilers/603862.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/its-kind-of-sad-when-you-think-about-it-possible-spoilers/603862.md?page=3)