# It's May! It's May! The merry month of mini-rants! **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [May 1, 2011, 12:48am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/its-may-its-may-the-merry-month-of-mini-rants/580336 "2011-05-01T00:48:06Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![purplehorseshoe](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/purplehorseshoe/32/2996_2.png) [@purplehorseshoe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/purplehorseshoe)\ **Post date:** [May 2, 2011, 8:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/its-may-its-may-the-merry-month-of-mini-rants/580336/41 "2011-05-02T20:28:54Z")
My job essentially entails receiving emailed requests to update websites (adding/removing docs, editing text, etc.) for our clients. Twice now in the last month I’ve been sent a document with the note “Please replace the attached form with the one currently on website.” Ummmm … nooooooooo. Also, we have a central email address for our team to use and discourage these clients from emailing us directly. (We track all the requests, not everyone on the team handles the same types of requests, plus, it’s more efficient: what if I didn’t come in that day? The request would just sit in my inbox.) So we often have to redirect people with a politely phrased “Would you please submit all website-related questions and updates through XYZ contact info? I’ll forward this email for you (so no need to resubmit it) and our first available team member will assist you.” Today on one of those, I get “So its on the website??? THANK YOU!!!” in response. No, you dumbfuck. That’s not even close to what I said. _English, motherfucker. Can you read it?_ ---
**Author:** ![margin](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/65b543/32.png) [@margin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/margin)\ **Post date:** [May 2, 2011, 9:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/its-may-its-may-the-merry-month-of-mini-rants/580336/42 "2011-05-02T21:00:18Z")
Dear Customer Service Dipshit: Here is how _not_ to provide customer service: “Hi, my name is so-and-so and I was just looking at my account on your website and I see that the service guy placed the same order _three times._” Not service guy: “Um, what is your name and address?” Pause, while I do so. “So…you’d like to place this order?” Moi: “No, it was placed three times in error. I should only be charged for two of these.” “I don’t see this anywhere.” “I’m looking right at the website, and it’s also in my email.” “Well…” Well, okay, the big thing was him asking me if I wanted to place an order after I pointed out that I’d been charged for three orders when I’d only ordered one. Dipshit. ---
**Author:** ![Little\_Bird](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/3ec8ea/32.png) [@Little\_Bird](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Little_Bird)\ **Post date:** [May 2, 2011, 9:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/its-may-its-may-the-merry-month-of-mini-rants/580336/43 "2011-05-02T21:32:39Z")
**purplehorseshoe** – Your pain, I feel it. ---
**Author:** ![Ludovic](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/7ab992/32.png) [@Ludovic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ludovic)\ **Post date:** [May 2, 2011, 9:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/its-may-its-may-the-merry-month-of-mini-rants/580336/44 "2011-05-02T21:45:29Z")
> [@purplehorseshoe](#): > > My job essentially entails receiving emailed requests to update websites (adding/removing docs, editing text, etc.) for our clients. Twice now in the last month I’ve been sent a document with the note “Please replace the attached form with the one currently on website.” You could Reply and cut out the file they sent you and instead attach a copy of the current web page. Say “Done. I have now replaced the document you sent with the one currently on website.” ---
**Author:** ![congodwarf](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/e36b37/32.png) [@congodwarf](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/congodwarf)\ **Post date:** [May 2, 2011, 9:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/its-may-its-may-the-merry-month-of-mini-rants/580336/45 "2011-05-02T21:57:47Z")
> [@Chessic\_Sense](#): > > Not to derail the thread or anything, but…how do you figure it’s NOT your niece’s fault? Are you unfamiliar with tailgating? What about blame-shifting? The person who turned wasn’t necessarily in front of her for her to be tailgating. She could have been driving the speed limit with no one in front of her. If someone facing her turned left, it would send them right into her path with no warning. Same thing if the other person randomly pulled out of a side street to turn left with no warning. I had exactly that kind of accident. I was also driving way too fast to stop but I was also driving the speed limit. According to the state police, my insurance, and his insurance, I was 100% not at fault (in an at-fault state). It is possible. Then again, maybe she was tailgating and is transferring the blame. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Chimera](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/8e8cbc/32.png) [@Chimera](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chimera)\ **Post date:** [May 2, 2011, 10:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/its-may-its-may-the-merry-month-of-mini-rants/580336/46 "2011-05-02T22:52:55Z")
> [@congodwarf](#): > > The person who turned wasn’t necessarily in front of her for her to be tailgating. > > She could have been driving the speed limit with no one in front of her. If someone facing her turned left, it would send them right into her path with no warning. Same thing if the other person randomly pulled out of a side street to turn left with no warning. Almost had someone do that to me today on my return from the Dentist. They slowed and then just started to turn before noticing my RED CAR right in front of their face. It appeared to me they were too busy looking down at their dashboard or something on their lap before turning the wheel. Fortunately they only got an inch or so across the line before stopping. ---
**Author:** ![purplehorseshoe](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/purplehorseshoe/32/2996_2.png) [@purplehorseshoe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/purplehorseshoe)\ **Post date:** [May 2, 2011, 10:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/its-may-its-may-the-merry-month-of-mini-rants/580336/47 "2011-05-02T22:58:09Z")
> [@Little\_Bird](#): > > **purplehorseshoe** – Your pain, I feel it. Yours, however, I do not! 😛 ---
**Author:** ![congodwarf](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/e36b37/32.png) [@congodwarf](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/congodwarf)\ **Post date:** [May 2, 2011, 11:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/its-may-its-may-the-merry-month-of-mini-rants/580336/48 "2011-05-02T23:01:58Z")
> [@Chimera](#): > > Almost had someone do that to me today on my return from the Dentist. They slowed and then just started to turn before noticing my RED CAR right in front of their face. It appeared to me they were too busy looking down at their dashboard or something on their lap before turning the wheel. Fortunately they only got an inch or so across the line before stopping. The guy who did it to me came to a complete stop and was looking straight at me. He claimed that the 18-wheeler in front of him prevented him from seeing me. There was no truck and if there had been, why the hell would anyone tell the cop they turned into oncoming traffic even though they couldn’t see if there WAS any oncoming traffic? That’s just dumb. If you’re going to lie, at least try to choose a lie that helps you out. ---
**Author:** ![Lionne](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/8e8cbc/32.png) [@Lionne](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lionne)\ **Post date:** [May 3, 2011, 1:08am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/its-may-its-may-the-merry-month-of-mini-rants/580336/49 "2011-05-03T01:08:33Z")
Why can’t I look \*that \*good braless? ---
**Author:** ![SeaDragonTattoo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/df705f/32.png) [@SeaDragonTattoo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SeaDragonTattoo)\ **Post date:** [May 3, 2011, 3:26am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/its-may-its-may-the-merry-month-of-mini-rants/580336/50 "2011-05-03T03:26:35Z")
> [@Little\_Bird](#): > > You want poop talk? I got yer poop talk right here! > > TMI, obvy: > > [spoiler]Between pregnancy, prenatal vitamins, and milk being basically the only thing I can reliably eat (drink?) and not feel like crap after, I’ve been constipated. So much so that the other day, my poo **got stuck on the way out.** When I was **at work.** And I was forced to take some toilet paper and **attempt to pull it out.** And then I broke through the TP and **got it all on my hands.** At which point I gave up and **dug it all out of myself with my finger.** And then washed my hands a thousand times. > > Ever felt the inside of your own rectum? I have! Thanks pregnancy! My mantra the past three months “This baby better be worth it. This baby better be worth it…” > [/spoiler] This was awesome and made me laugh heartily. Thanks for that! Not much of a rant from me, otherwise. I just wish the 2nd branch at work would hire someone who sticks around for more than a week. It’s not a position that should be hard to fill, or keep someone in, IMO, but the last new person quit after a week and I keep having to fill in for them a couple days a week. The commute sucks and the job just isn’t my slice, even though I can do it fine. Plus, my regular work falls behind because I’m the only one who does it. Sigh. I guess it’s job security, so my complaining is weak. ---
**Author:** ![Cat\_Whisperer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cat_whisperer/32/4839_2.png) [@Cat\_Whisperer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cat_Whisperer)\ **Post date:** [May 3, 2011, 3:55am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/its-may-its-may-the-merry-month-of-mini-rants/580336/51 "2011-05-03T03:55:26Z")
> [@Chimera](#): > > Almost had someone do that to me today on my return from the Dentist. They slowed and then just started to turn before noticing my RED CAR right in front of their face. It appeared to me they were too busy looking down at their dashboard or something on their lap before turning the wheel. Fortunately they only got an inch or so across the line before stopping. In the five years I’ve been driving my silver Corolla, I’ve discovered that it apparently is invisible to other drivers. Defensive driving is a MUST in a car like that, especially with all the Aggressoids in their Behemothmobiles on the roads. > [@Lionne](#): > > Why can’t I look \*that \*good braless? Gravity is a harsh mistress. ---
**Author:** ![gonzomax](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/e8c25b/32.png) [@gonzomax](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/gonzomax)\ **Post date:** [May 3, 2011, 4:17am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/its-may-its-may-the-merry-month-of-mini-rants/580336/52 "2011-05-03T04:17:14Z")
The entire next week, we in Dearborn will not break 60 degrees. It is rainy and cold, about 10 to 15 degrees below normal. It has been that way for over a month. It is wet, cold and muddy. ---
**Author:** ![Chanteuse](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/9de053/32.png) [@Chanteuse](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chanteuse)\ **Post date:** [May 3, 2011, 7:55am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/its-may-its-may-the-merry-month-of-mini-rants/580336/53 "2011-05-03T07:55:37Z")
> [@congodwarf](#): > > The person who turned wasn’t necessarily in front of her for her to be tailgating. > > She could have been driving the speed limit with no one in front of her. If someone facing her turned left, it would send them right into her path with no warning. Same thing if the other person randomly pulled out of a side street to turn left with no warning. > > I had exactly that kind of accident. I was also driving way too fast to stop but I was also driving the speed limit. According to the state police, my insurance, and his insurance, I was 100% not at fault (in an at-fault state). It is possible. Definitely possible–that’s what happened in [this](http://www.northescambia.com/?p=49174) accident. FTR, I was driving the car and injuries were minor. ---
**Author:** ![Ann\_Hedonia](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ann_hedonia/32/319_2.png) [@Ann\_Hedonia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ann_Hedonia)\ **Post date:** [May 3, 2011, 1:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/its-may-its-may-the-merry-month-of-mini-rants/580336/54 "2011-05-03T13:32:45Z")
> [@Chessic\_Sense](#): > > Not to derail the thread or anything, but…how do you figure it’s NOT your niece’s fault? Are you unfamiliar with tailgating? What about blame-shifting? She didn’t hit the car travelling in front of her, she had the right of way at a light and another car turned left in front of her. And my Mom has always had it in for her, simply because she was a good student and had many accomplishments, while Mom’s own kids and grandkids ( except yours truly) were living out episodes of “My Name is Earl”…I used to joke that watching that show was like home movies. ---
**Author:** ![blondebear](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/blondebear/32/1022_2.png) [@blondebear](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/blondebear)\ **Post date:** [May 3, 2011, 2:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/its-may-its-may-the-merry-month-of-mini-rants/580336/55 "2011-05-03T14:49:04Z")
I’d like to take this opportunity to pit the landscaper dudes at my apartment complex. They take great joy in using their leaf blowers to give every vehicle in the parking lot a nice coat of dust. I’ve even had them dust my car when I was sitting in it, fer og’s sake. He looked all surprised when I got out and told him to knock it off, but I know he did it on purpose. He might’ve be a jerk, but I know he wasn’t stupid. ---
**Author:** ![purplehorseshoe](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/purplehorseshoe/32/2996_2.png) [@purplehorseshoe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/purplehorseshoe)\ **Post date:** [May 3, 2011, 3:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/its-may-its-may-the-merry-month-of-mini-rants/580336/56 "2011-05-03T15:14:02Z")
> [@blondebear](#): > > … He might’ve be a jerk, but I know he wasn’t stupid. You’d be surprised … ---
**Author:** ![purplehorseshoe](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/purplehorseshoe/32/2996_2.png) [@purplehorseshoe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/purplehorseshoe)\ **Post date:** [May 3, 2011, 4:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/its-may-its-may-the-merry-month-of-mini-rants/580336/57 "2011-05-03T16:37:04Z")
What’s more fun: using my lunch break to spend hundreds of dollars I don’t have to spare to go get my car back from the mechanic, or spending my lunch break with my oh-so-delightful co-workers when I already have to spend all damn day with them? Doesn’t matter. Today, I get to figure out a way to cram both fun activities into my hour. Yay. ---
**Author:** ![Ludy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/d6d6ee/32.png) [@Ludy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ludy)\ **Post date:** [May 3, 2011, 5:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/its-may-its-may-the-merry-month-of-mini-rants/580336/58 "2011-05-03T17:42:09Z")
I am not a happy camper. I am about 6 months pregnant and really the pregnancy has not been that bad. I was however very silly. I booked my Gestational Diabetes blood test at the end of a ridiculous stress filled workweek. So my numbers were a little high. Like barely above what they want to see. OK no biggie there is another blood test I need to take now, to see if the first one was an anomaly or if I do have gestational diabetes. This test takes between two to three hours and you have to fast beforehand. OK. Still not a huge deal, the lab opens at 7:00am, so my plan is to make an appointment for 7:30am or so. That way my fast is over night, I wont be too late for work, and it’s just a late breakfast. Not too bad. So I phone to make an appointment. They don’t book that appointment until at least 8:30am. Oh and if I want to get in this week it has to be 9:30 at the earliest. So this means that I have to take off a full morning of work, and can’t eat anything until noon(ish). This does not make me happy. First of all why in the world would they not start a blood test that is specifically for pregnant women, that you have to fast for 10-16 hours beforehand when they danm well open? It’s not like they are taking the blood right away anyway! At the start of the appointment they just give you a sweet drink and you wait for an hour. Just to give you an idea of my 6 month pregnant eating schedule, today I had cereal at about 7:15am and a coffee. At about 10:30am I go into full hobbit mode and have second breakfasts. I had carrots dipped in tzatziki. I am still hungry but can wait until lunch. Other mornings I have a larger breakfast and can generally make it until lunch, or have a small snack in between. On and I am supposed to be taking iron supplements on an empty stomach right before I go to bed. So if I was to take those the night before (which I will be skipping) I would have to err on the 16 hour fast, which would mean going up to 19 hours with only water. Normally not a problem, but I am 6 months freaken pregnant! Eating regularly is not an option. Last week I had a lighter dinner and was working so I couldn’t eat. I was completely dead to the world and not functioning. This will not go well. So my Thursday morning is looking like me being hungry and grumpy waiting for an hour , getting some blood taken, and then waiting for another hour, then get more blood taken. Doesn’t that just sound super duper fun? Grumble grumble grumble. ---
**Author:** ![El\_Kabong](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/el_kabong/32/496_2.png) [@El\_Kabong](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/El_Kabong)\ **Post date:** [May 3, 2011, 6:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/its-may-its-may-the-merry-month-of-mini-rants/580336/59 "2011-05-03T18:17:00Z")
The damn office window is rattling again. It’s a high-frequency deal that usually occurs because someone is idling a car just outside, but I checked and there are no cars running. What the hell is it? Why won’t it stop? Like the pirate said about the steering wheel sticking out of his pants, it’s drivin’ me nuts. ---
**Author:** ![biddee](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/839c29/32.png) [@biddee](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/biddee)\ **Post date:** [May 3, 2011, 6:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/its-may-its-may-the-merry-month-of-mini-rants/580336/60 "2011-05-03T18:17:28Z")
Mini Facebook rant - anyone who clicks a link that says ‘bin Laden death video’ or ‘teen’s father walks in as she commits suicide’ should be shot. If you don’t know by now that these are viruses/malware/phishing sites then you don’t deserve to own a computer. I am thinking of setting up a 419 scam for all my dumbass friends that seem to believe anything they see online! [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/its-may-its-may-the-merry-month-of-mini-rants/580336.md?page=2) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/its-may-its-may-the-merry-month-of-mini-rants/580336.md?page=4)