# It's not even winter and I already hate you motherfuckers **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [December 15, 2013, 4:08am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/its-not-even-winter-and-i-already-hate-you-motherfuckers/676354 "2013-12-15T04:08:53Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 4
**Author:** ![Frank](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/3d9bf3/32.png) [@Frank](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Frank)\ **Post date:** [December 17, 2013, 12:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/its-not-even-winter-and-i-already-hate-you-motherfuckers/676354/61 "2013-12-17T12:39:27Z")
If you’re turning around in a driveway, please use the section that is already cleared, and not the section I haven’t got to yet. Otherwise, I’m going to hunt you down, strip you naked, staple you to that patch of (now) ice that will be there till spring, and leave you there for the duration. ---
**Author:** ![FXMastermind](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/fxmastermind/32/7289_2.png) [@FXMastermind](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/FXMastermind)\ **Post date:** [December 17, 2013, 2:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/its-not-even-winter-and-i-already-hate-you-motherfuckers/676354/62 "2013-12-17T14:02:37Z")
> [@curlcoat](#): > > God, I don’t miss living in a place that has winter … > > not at all. Yeah, now that I no longer have to deal with the sheer horror of snow, and other people, and other people’s snow, I can laugh at the frustrations the poor northerners suffer each year. > [@Mooch](#): > > Fuck you cunts who can manage to shovel your driveway but can’t be fucked to figure out the fucking sidewalk. Better to buy a snow blower, and clear all your neighbors sidewalks, than to curse the darkness. Except when the really evil shit happens, and plows (or front end loaders) dump 6 feet of rock hard ice onto the sidewalks I cleared the day before. As well as every driveway I cleared. Because all the fuckholes with 4wd couldn’t wait and drove on the snow packing it down into ice before the plows could get to it. Fuck snow. Fuck cold. ---
**Author:** ![pulykamell](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/pulykamell/32/3166_2.png) [@pulykamell](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pulykamell)\ **Post date:** [December 17, 2013, 2:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/its-not-even-winter-and-i-already-hate-you-motherfuckers/676354/63 "2013-12-17T14:08:48Z")
> [@CanvasShoes](#): > > It can’t be done with a snow shovel, not in any 4 minutes (as stated up thread…WTH?). That’s for up to about 4 inches of snow, as we got here the other day. And, like I said in my follow-up, that’s for “a couple inches of snow.” More snow will, naturally, require much more time, but we (or at least a lot of people in my neighborhood) usually shovel a couple times during a snowfall if it’s very heavy. When we had the blizzard here a couple years ago, it was probably more like 20-30 minutes of shoveling. But a typical Chicago snowfall is only a couple of inches. I much rather shovel snow than rake leaves or mow the lawn. ---
**Author:** ![Rachellelogram](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/rachellelogram/32/8689_2.png) [@Rachellelogram](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rachellelogram)\ **Post date:** [December 17, 2013, 2:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/its-not-even-winter-and-i-already-hate-you-motherfuckers/676354/64 "2013-12-17T14:15:49Z")
> [@Frank](#): > > If you’re turning around in a driveway, please use the section that is already cleared, and not the section I haven’t got to yet. > > Otherwise, I’m going to hunt you down, strip you naked, staple you to that patch of (now) ice that will be there till spring, and leave you there for the duration. Rock salt is your friend. ---
**Author:** ![WhyNot](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/c77e96/32.png) [@WhyNot](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/WhyNot)\ **Post date:** [December 17, 2013, 2:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/its-not-even-winter-and-i-already-hate-you-motherfuckers/676354/65 "2013-12-17T14:17:53Z")
\*\*pulykamell \*\*is also a strapping young man who does not yet know the pains of middle aged knees and backs, I believe. 😉 ---
**Author:** ![pulykamell](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/pulykamell/32/3166_2.png) [@pulykamell](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pulykamell)\ **Post date:** [December 17, 2013, 2:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/its-not-even-winter-and-i-already-hate-you-motherfuckers/676354/66 "2013-12-17T14:35:18Z")
> [@WhyNot](#): > > \*\*pulykamell \*\*is also a strapping young man who does not yet know the pains of middle aged knees and backs, I believe. 😉 Slowly, but surely, I’m getting there. 38. I admit, I do do it at a bit of a rushed pace, as I just want to get it over with as quickly as possible. Digging out parking spaces is the real pain in the ass when you get a decent snowfall, since you have that ridge of slushy heavy snow on the outside of the space from where the street traffic’s been throwing snow off to the side. But I refuse to reserve it with a chair or a cone or random garbage from the garage. ---
**Author:** ![Mooch](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/7bcc69/32.png) [@Mooch](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mooch)\ **Post date:** [December 17, 2013, 3:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/its-not-even-winter-and-i-already-hate-you-motherfuckers/676354/67 "2013-12-17T15:35:46Z")
> [@FXMastermind](#): > > Better to buy a snow blower, and clear all your neighbors sidewalks, than to curse the darkness. I have a hand me down el crapola one that I usually use down the whole block but it shit its pants this year and I have no clue about engines. With my shovel I’ll usually get to the neighbors on either side of me. Especially the old fuckers to my north. But I’ll be godddamned if I’m gonna shovel the whole block by hand you lazy shit birds, let alone the miles I walk my dog every day. Oh look it’s snowing again. Fuck it, maybe I need snow shoes. ---
**Author:** ![Ispolkom](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/e47774/32.png) [@Ispolkom](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ispolkom)\ **Post date:** [December 17, 2013, 3:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/its-not-even-winter-and-i-already-hate-you-motherfuckers/676354/68 "2013-12-17T15:36:14Z")
> [@CanvasShoes](#): > > Where do people who have to shovel the sidewalk put the snow? They can’t put it in the street, (based on what people were saying upthread), so where does it go? If other snowy states are like Alaska if you try and put it in your yard, you’ve got Mount Everest in about two snowfalls. And how far do they have to shovel it? Along the whole block? Or just in front of their own house? > > Does anyone have any idea what a four foot tall snow berm that’s been snowplowed up onto the sidewalk weighs or what the tensile strength is? It’s like a pile of concrete. It can’t be done with a snow shovel, not in any 4 minutes (as stated up thread…WTH?). And it sure as hell isn’t going to get done after someone gets home from work, we’re talking a several day long project here. In the meantime, while the person works at it, walkers are going to have to go around anyway. Sure the snowplow plows you in after you’ve shoveled your driveway out, and sure it’s a pain in the ass to shovel the compacted, frozen, icy snow that the plow leaves, but _everybody_ does that, because if you don’t you can’t get out of your driveway. And sure the shoveled snow can pile up, leading to Pillars of Hercules taller than our car on either side of the driveway entrance. But people manage to clear their driveways that same day because they **have to** in order to get to work the next day. Do Alaskans get snow days? Minnesotans don’t. The assholes are the ones who finish the driveway and then don’t spend the extra small amount of time to shovel their God damned sidewalks. ---
**Author:** ![FXMastermind](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/fxmastermind/32/7289_2.png) [@FXMastermind](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/FXMastermind)\ **Post date:** [December 17, 2013, 4:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/its-not-even-winter-and-i-already-hate-you-motherfuckers/676354/69 "2013-12-17T16:07:52Z")
I used to shovel/blow the snow out of the street that the plow was going to shove into my driveway, before the plow came. And leave a spot for the plow to shove it into, BEFORE it got to my driveway. Because it was easier than dealing with that pile of ice and snow the plow was going to create. Also bribery. The plow guy would take cash in exchange for not blocking my drive. Was it wrong that he shoved it onto my asshole neighbors drive two houses down instead? I don’t know. Snow ethics, they were a bitch. ---
**Author:** ![Kimballkid](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/b5a626/32.png) [@Kimballkid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kimballkid)\ **Post date:** [December 17, 2013, 5:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/its-not-even-winter-and-i-already-hate-you-motherfuckers/676354/70 "2013-12-17T17:01:27Z")
> [@Cyros](#): > > Take your sidewalk rant, fold it until it is all sharp corners and pass it up yer corn hole! I’m not spending an extra 45 minutes moving the 4ft high pile of dense heavy crap that the plot leaves on my sidewalk when literally nobody else does it. It is bad enough that the city sees fit to move this shit into the end of my driveway and forces me to remove it if I want to leave the house. To add insult to injury the city has sidewalk snowblowers that it sends through every subdivision in the area but ours so my municipal tax dollars are already being put towards sidewalk clearing, just not mine. > [@Biggirl](#): > > Fuck you, you lazy fucking **cumin** bubble. Shovel your fucking walk and stop making goddamed excuses. Bolding mine. I didn’t know **Cyros** was Mexican. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Cat\_Whisperer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cat_whisperer/32/4839_2.png) [@Cat\_Whisperer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cat_Whisperer)\ **Post date:** [December 17, 2013, 5:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/its-not-even-winter-and-i-already-hate-you-motherfuckers/676354/71 "2013-12-17T17:35:02Z")
> [@Ispolkom](#): > > \ > The assholes are the ones who finish the driveway and then don’t spend the extra small amount of time to shovel their God damned sidewalks. But they will never set foot to ground in their own neighbourhood, just drive, so shovelling the sidewalks doesn’t matter. :rolleyes: > [@FXMastermind](#): > > \Was it wrong that he shoved it onto my asshole neighbors drive two houses down instead?\ Probably, but I’m not going to condemn you. Snow ethics are indeed a bitch. 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![curlcoat](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/ea5d25/32.png) [@curlcoat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/curlcoat)\ **Post date:** [December 17, 2013, 7:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/its-not-even-winter-and-i-already-hate-you-motherfuckers/676354/72 "2013-12-17T19:50:25Z")
> [@monstro](#): > > Everywhere I’ved lived that snows regularly (NJ and VA) specifies that sidewalks much be cleared. Not just the front of the house. All sidewalks adjoining the property. Which totally makes sense. What’s the point of clearing just the front, when pedestrians (including letter carriers, pizza delivery guys, police officers, little kids on their way to school) can theoretically come from all directions? 😕 Are you talking about corner lots, that would have a sidewalk in front and on one side, or ? > [@Ispolkom](#): > > But people manage to clear their driveways that same day because they **have to** in order to get to work the next day. Do Alaskans get snow days? Minnesotans don’t. I dunno about Alaskans, but when I lived up on the Canadian border, we just had vehicles that could drive in the snow. ---
**Author:** ![Cat\_Whisperer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cat_whisperer/32/4839_2.png) [@Cat\_Whisperer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cat_Whisperer)\ **Post date:** [December 17, 2013, 8:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/its-not-even-winter-and-i-already-hate-you-motherfuckers/676354/73 "2013-12-17T20:07:00Z")
> [@curlcoat](#): > > 😕 Are you talking about corner lots, that would have a sidewalk in front and on one side, or ? Yup. We live on a corner lot, and we are responsible for the sidewalk on the east side of our yard (the front), and also the sidewalk on the south side of our yard (the side). > [@](#): > > I dunno about Alaskans, but when I lived up on the Canadian border, we just had vehicles that could drive in the snow. We have vehicles that can drive in the snow here, too; every so often (maybe once or twice per winter), we get so much snow at one time that people can and do take a snow day, though. It’s been snowing all night, there’s six inches of new snow on the roads, plows haven’t really done anything yet, you know it’s going to take three hours to get to work and three hours to get home again, the city police are advising everyone to just stay off the roads today - you call in to work and tell them you’re not coming in today, and it’s (usually) no problem. ---
**Author:** ![Ispolkom](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/e47774/32.png) [@Ispolkom](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ispolkom)\ **Post date:** [December 17, 2013, 8:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/its-not-even-winter-and-i-already-hate-you-motherfuckers/676354/74 "2013-12-17T20:53:44Z")
> [@curlcoat](#): > > I dunno about Alaskans, but when I lived up on the Canadian border, we just had vehicles that could drive in the snow. And I live in a city, so I’m unlikely to have the sort of vehicle that would traverse \*\*CanvasShoe’s \*\*“four foot tall snow berm that’s been snowplowed up.” Neither do those slackards who don’t shovel their walks. They all still shovel their driveways. I’d be a lot less annoyed if they shoveled nothing, and drove about in some sort of postapocalyptic eight-wheeled armored vehicle. Looking at the sun glinting on the bare driveway while I slip and slide on the now-icy unshoveled sidewalk is what made me put the snitch line as a speed dial on my cellphone. Better to light a candle than curse the asshole. ---
**Author:** ![CanvasShoes](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/74df32/32.png) [@CanvasShoes](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CanvasShoes)\ **Post date:** [December 18, 2013, 12:57am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/its-not-even-winter-and-i-already-hate-you-motherfuckers/676354/75 "2013-12-18T00:57:53Z")
> [@monstro](#): > > Everywhere I’ved lived that snows regularly (NJ and VA) specifies that sidewalks much be cleared. Not just the front of the house. All sidewalks adjoining the property. Which totally makes sense. What’s the point of clearing just the front, when pedestrians (including letter carriers, pizza delivery guys, police officers, little kids on their way to school) can theoretically come from all directions? I guess I’ve never lived anywhere that had more than one side with a sidewalk. Nor have I ever lived anyplace where the sidewalks weren’t the city’s responsibility. If people have to clear the sidewalks, are the sidewalks then part of their actual real estate, they own it? > [@](#): > > I don’t know if my locale will waive sidewalk clearance if the snow is particularly heavy. It would certainly make sense. However, we’re lucky if we get just a few inches over the course of a year. It’s overwhelming if you let it pile up over multiple storm events, but it’s not that hard to lick it down if you keep up with it routinely… I’m not talking about merely heavy snow that someone has allowed to build up over a few snowfalls, I’m talking about a giant rock hard berm that the snowplow pushed onto the sidewalk when they plowed at 3am, snow that consisted of half melted slush when it was plowed. I’ve had to clear a few of those (they don’t “cut out” for people’s driveways, even though they’re supposed to), just from in front of your driveway you’re talking at least a three afternoon stretch of hard labor. My gosh, I feel sorry for peeps who live where it does this and they’re responsible, even worse if it’s not even their property, but they have to clear it. Wow. ---
**Author:** ![CanvasShoes](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/74df32/32.png) [@CanvasShoes](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CanvasShoes)\ **Post date:** [December 18, 2013, 1:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/its-not-even-winter-and-i-already-hate-you-motherfuckers/676354/76 "2013-12-18T01:00:12Z")
> [@curlcoat](#): > > I dunno about Alaskans, but when I lived up on the Canadian border, we just had vehicles that could drive in the snow. Um yeah, you got it, that’s pretty much what happens for most people there. They just go over it. ---
**Author:** ![monstro](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/ba9def/32.png) [@monstro](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/monstro)\ **Post date:** [December 18, 2013, 1:32am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/its-not-even-winter-and-i-already-hate-you-motherfuckers/676354/77 "2013-12-18T01:32:16Z")
> [@CanvasShoes](#): > > I guess I’ve never lived anywhere that had more than one side with a sidewalk. Nor have I ever lived anyplace where the sidewalks weren’t the city’s responsibility. If people have to clear the sidewalks, are the sidewalks then part of their actual real estate, they own it? No. But it’s no different than clearing shrubbery so it doesn’t block the sidewalk, or mowing the strip of grass between the sidewalk and the street. It’s public property, but it’s considered the duty of the homeowner to take care of it. My city struggles to clear the roads in a timely fashion. There’s no way it could tackle all the sidewalks. ---
**Author:** ![Cat\_Whisperer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cat_whisperer/32/4839_2.png) [@Cat\_Whisperer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cat_Whisperer)\ **Post date:** [December 18, 2013, 1:54am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/its-not-even-winter-and-i-already-hate-you-motherfuckers/676354/78 "2013-12-18T01:54:33Z")
> [@Ispolkom](#): > > \ Looking at the sun glinting on the bare driveway while I slip and slide on the now-icy unshoveled sidewalk is what made me put the snitch line as a speed dial on my cellphone. Better to light a candle than curse the asshole. Calgary has a snitch line for unshovelled sidewalks, too; I recall a couple of years ago, the city announced that we shouldn’t bother calling it any longer, because there were so many calls and unshovelled walks backed up that there was no way they could get to all of them. That infuriated me; if unshovelled, dangerous sidewalks are such a big problem here, then you need to do something about it other than telling people to just shut up about it. ---
**Author:** ![The\_Second\_Stone](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/bbe5ce/32.png) [@The\_Second\_Stone](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_Second_Stone)\ **Post date:** [December 18, 2013, 4:29am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/its-not-even-winter-and-i-already-hate-you-motherfuckers/676354/79 "2013-12-18T04:29:50Z")
Ha Ha. If I want to deal with snow, I can drive up to Lake Tahoe in just a few hours, pay my respects to Fredo and stay at a friend’s second house that they never use. Then back to the bay, where a really cold winter’s day reminds me of being in the Avenues during July. Really, what are all you peeps doing living somewhere other than California? ---
**Author:** ![Smeghead](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/f1d935/32.png) [@Smeghead](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Smeghead)\ **Post date:** [December 18, 2013, 12:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/its-not-even-winter-and-i-already-hate-you-motherfuckers/676354/80 "2013-12-18T12:45:04Z")
> [@The\_Second\_Stone](#): > > Really, what are all you peeps doing living somewhere other than California? It’s kind of nice having a functional state government. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/its-not-even-winter-and-i-already-hate-you-motherfuckers/676354.md?page=3) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/its-not-even-winter-and-i-already-hate-you-motherfuckers/676354.md?page=5)