# It's the Silicon Valley restaurant review thread!

**URL:** <https://boards.straightdope.com/t/its-the-silicon-valley-restaurant-review-thread/42897>\
**Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\
**Created:** [November 27, 2000, 7:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/its-the-silicon-valley-restaurant-review-thread/42897 "2000-11-27T19:11:20Z")\
**Posts on this page:** 11\
**Page:** 2

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**Author:** ![Sue\_Duhnym](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/91b2a8/32.png) [@Sue\_Duhnym](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sue_Duhnym)\
**Post date:** [December 5, 2000, 12:57am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/its-the-silicon-valley-restaurant-review-thread/42897/21 "2000-12-05T00:57:23Z")

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Willow Street Wood Fired Pizza is right around the corner from my house…so if you wanna have a DopePizzaFest, maybe we should meet here and walk.

I haven’t been here long, but I’ll add my vote for Le Mouton Noir.

There’s another place up in Saratoga too (can’t recall the name) that has an UNBELIEVEABLE wine list, just astounding and the service is always good. They have a great foie gras appetizer.

Has anyone been to Le Papillion?

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**Author:** ![Zenster](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/cdc98d/32.png) [@Zenster](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Zenster)\
**Post date:** [December 5, 2000, 1:47am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/its-the-silicon-valley-restaurant-review-thread/42897/22 "2000-12-05T01:47:15Z")

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I’ve been to Le Papillion. It was/is owned by David Angel the photolithography department manager of a chip foundry I worked at. The service and food was adequate. All I really remember was an appetizer of cold smoked salmon topped with coarse grain French Pommeroy mustard. It was a superb combination, but for some reason the main course didn’t stick in my memory. Le Mouton Noir is superior for quality and intimacy.

I believe the other restaurant (with the monster wine list) you were referring to **Sue** is the **The Plumed Horse**. While a lover and I were celebrating an anniversary at Le Mouton, then President Ford pulled up and dined across the street at The Plumed Horse. The running joke was that he had gone to the wrong place that evening.

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**Author:** ![Sue\_Duhnym](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/91b2a8/32.png) [@Sue\_Duhnym](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sue_Duhnym)\
**Post date:** [December 5, 2000, 2:27am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/its-the-silicon-valley-restaurant-review-thread/42897/23 "2000-12-05T02:27:17Z")

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> [@](#):
>
> \*Originally posted by Zenster \*  
> I believe the other restaurant (with the monster wine list) you were referring to **Sue** is the **The Plumed Horse**.

You’re right.

I’ve never had anything but great meals there.

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**Author:** ![pricciar](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/f4b2a3/32.png) [@pricciar](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pricciar)\
**Post date:** [December 8, 2000, 3:15am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/its-the-silicon-valley-restaurant-review-thread/42897/24 "2000-12-08T03:15:48Z")

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I commissioned my good friend up in Northern California to check out the claim made by Zenster about the best pizza in the land. My friend and I take our pizza seriously, so we like to check out grand cheese claims, much like the Catholic church likes to check out claims of miracles.

What follows is his review of the pizza joint.

> [@](#):
>
> “The best pizza in all of California”
> 
> I’m not even going to address that claim. I left this place  
> wondering how they can serve this crap with a straight face.  
> ANY brand of frozen pizza would be a superior choice. You  
> know of course that as a native New Yorker, I don’t say such  
> things lightly. It pains me to drag frozen pizza into this.  
> But that is the only possible basis for comparison. This was,  
> without question, the worst pizza I’ve ever eaten. I  
> seriously considered throwing it out half-eaten. Now I wish  
> that I had.
> 
> In terms of culinary dissatisfaction, this eclipses even that  
> unspeakable evening eight years ago when I was dragged to a  
> yuppie slime-den in Falls Church, VA. The bleach-blond  
> waiters wore black turtle necks with black jeans, and served  
> uncooked pizzas on stone slabs, swishing merrily to-and-fro to  
> the blaring accompaniment of the latest “alternative” hits(I  
> think it was the same year Budweiser was marketing itself as  
> “The Alternative Beer”).
> 
> If they served pizza on airplanes, it would be better than  
> this. I don’t know what confused, troubled soul recommended  
> this place, or what went wrong in his past, but whoever he is,  
> he owes me $6.00.
> 
> I realize that it must be hard for you to reconcile these  
> conflicting accounts, without being able to experience the  
> full horror of the offending “food” product yourself. I  
> consoled myself during the long trip back up the 280 by  
> devising this simulation for you to perform:
> 
> Find a baby. A good sized baby. One that’s old enough to eat  
> squishy foods with a spoon.
> 
> Stuff the baby full of Chef Boyardee Ravioli with Cheese.
> 
> Hold the baby upside down over a tray of unleavened bread.  
> Stale communion hosts would be an excellent choice.
> 
> Shake baby vigorously.
> 
> After the baby has vomited copiously, smear product into a  
> thin paste.
> 
> Place an iron on top of the “pizza”. Go do something else for  
> a while. Forget all about the “pizza”. Come back when cheese  
> and communion host are equally crunchy.
> 
> Enjoy.  
> I can’t overemphasize how awful this “pizza” is. As you know,  
> I’ve worked in several schools where the vast majority of  
> students recieved free lunches. Every now and again, at the  
> end of the lunch period, cafeteria workers would dump surplus  
> slices of pizza in the teachers’ lounge, still securely  
> wrapped in their polypyrene sleeping bags, having been  
> steam-heated approximately 1/2 an hour before. Am I proud of  
> the fact that I ate these cafeteria pizzas? No, of course not.  
> Would I recommend them to a friend? Uh, no. But I’d rather  
> eat them every night for the rest of my life than return to  
> this disgraceful piss hole. Bad enough to eat such things,  
> but to then go on the internet and make such outlandish  
> claims, goes beyond poor taste to outright malice.
> 
> I reiterate: this clown owes me 6 bucks. And he should start  
> cleansing his palate after the golden showers.  
> Yours in cheese,  
> Pat North

This is his unedited account of the place.  
I am trying to save unfortunate Silicon Valley dopers a bad cheese experience, I think an opposing viewpoint is in order when discussing these important cheese issues.

pat

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**Author:** ![Zenster](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/cdc98d/32.png) [@Zenster](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Zenster)\
**Post date:** [December 8, 2000, 3:53am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/its-the-silicon-valley-restaurant-review-thread/42897/25 "2000-12-08T03:53:28Z")

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Your friend’s head is so far up his @ss I doubt that he can even swallow without blinking!

Every single person that I have ever taken to Cicero’s has walked away extolling the virtues of the place. My Italian-American girlfriend gave them a solid nine out of ten points.

Mister North’s failure to suggest a place with better pizza is a solid indicator of his dubious credentials. The coarse language of his review also belies his lack of delicate sensibilities. I would have a hard time believing he doesn’t secretly enjoy ordering Dominoe’s on a regular basis.  
I shall personally mourn when Cicero’s closes.

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**Author:** ![pricciar](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/f4b2a3/32.png) [@pricciar](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pricciar)\
**Post date:** [December 8, 2000, 8:09am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/its-the-silicon-valley-restaurant-review-thread/42897/26 "2000-12-08T08:09:39Z")

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Hey, as his letter says, he is a native New Yorker, that explains his high standards in pizza, it also probably explains his use of so-called harsh language.

I didn’t ask him for any Pizza alternative, just asked him to check that place out. I am sure he has a long non-national merchant list of good pizza to be had.

It sounds like it is just a pizza dispute that will not be settled, different cheese philisophies are at work. The philosophy of my friend (and I) emphasizes good sauce and cheese. The other school of thought relies on many toppings and other filler that takes away from the beauty of the cheese and sauce.

In any case, this has brought this interesting thread back to the top. I like this thread, it is nice to hear everyone’s views on area spots for good food.

pat

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**Author:** ![Doobieous](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/da6949/32.png) [@Doobieous](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Doobieous)\
**Post date:** [December 8, 2000, 8:20am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/its-the-silicon-valley-restaurant-review-thread/42897/27 "2000-12-08T08:20:02Z")

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> [@](#):
>
> \*Originally posted by Zenster \*  
> **Your friend’s head is so far up his @ss I doubt that he can even swallow without blinking!**

Oh come on Zenster, we all know you’re just mad cause someone didnt agree with your “expert” opinion on what “good” food should be. 😃

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**Author:** ![Zenster](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/cdc98d/32.png) [@Zenster](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Zenster)\
**Post date:** [December 8, 2000, 10:36am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/its-the-silicon-valley-restaurant-review-thread/42897/28 "2000-12-08T10:36:32Z")

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> [@](#):
>
> \*Originally posted by Doobieous \*  
> \*\*…Oh come on Zenster, we all know you’re just mad cause someone didn’t agree with your “expert” opinion on what “good” food should be. 😃 \*\*

Quite seriously **Doob** , some of the pickiest eaters I have ever known refer to the pizza at Cicero’s as “art”. If you are able to attend one of the Straight Dope Pizza Parties that I’m planning, you’ll have a chance to see for yourself.

Strangest of all is that I agree with our east coast critics about pizza design. I don’t go for frou-frou, piled high thick crust pizza. For me, its good old pepperoni, salami and mushrooms with some extra sauce on a thin crust. It now occurs to me that this may have been the problem. If you do not order their pizza with the extra sauce it doesn’t attain it’s stellar proportions.

Anyway folks, head on over to the [Silicon Valley SD Pizza Party](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?threadid=49974) thread. If you’re going to be up in town **Doob** , let us know so that we can try to schedule around it.

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**Author:** ![Doobieous](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/da6949/32.png) [@Doobieous](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Doobieous)\
**Post date:** [December 8, 2000, 11:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/its-the-silicon-valley-restaurant-review-thread/42897/29 "2000-12-08T23:19:14Z")

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> [@](#):
>
> \*Originally posted by Zenster \*  
> **Quite seriously Doob, some of the pickiest eaters I have ever known refer to the pizza at Cicero’s as “art”. If you are able to attend one of the Straight Dope Pizza Parties that I’m planning, you’ll have a chance to see for yourself.**

Don’t have to justify it to me. I am not a picky eater, and I rarely listen to other people’s reviews of restaurants. I like to see for myself first, before making a descision.

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**Author:** ![Silo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ac91a4/32.png) [@Silo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Silo)\
**Post date:** [December 8, 2000, 11:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/its-the-silicon-valley-restaurant-review-thread/42897/30 "2000-12-08T23:50:59Z")

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> [@](#):
>
> \*Originally posted by Zenster \*
> 
> [li]Ciceros Pizza[/li][sup]Stevens Creek Boulevard, Cupertino[/sup]  
> [sup]THE FINEST THIN CRUST PIZZA, BAR NONE[/sup]

I agree.

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**Author:** ![teela\_brown](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/d9b06d/32.png) [@teela\_brown](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/teela_brown)\
**Post date:** [December 9, 2000, 12:01am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/its-the-silicon-valley-restaurant-review-thread/42897/31 "2000-12-09T00:01:17Z")

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I had some mighty good fish ‘n’ chips today.

I was not hungry at all, having had a large breakfast, so I decided to just get out of the office and go cruising on my lunch hour. On my way back, I passed the “Race Street Fish and Poultry Market” on Race Street in San Jose. In addition to selling (rather overpriced) fresh fish, they have a little restaurant and do the usual fried fish/oysters/calamari thing. They also have a grill out front and sell grilled seafood.

I ordered a fried combo plate and some chowder “just for tasting purposes,” since I wasn’t hungry. I ended up eating every single bit of food, because it was topnotch chowder and very good fried seafood, especially the oysters. Nice fresh firm oysters, not too big or squashy. This is a no-frills joint, but they are very popular and move a lot of fish, so everything’s fresh and good, and the price is reasonable. I didn’t try the grilled seafood, but I’ll do that next time.

P.S.: There is a HUGE pile of fresh Dungeness crabs, packed in crushed ice, in front of the place. If there’s anything in the world tastier than Dungeness crab, I’d like to know what it is. If I wasn’t going to a @%#@%##@%\* office party tonight, I’d have gotten one for my dinner.

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