# It's time to officially Pit Joe Paterno and the Penn State football program. **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [November 7, 2011, 2:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/its-time-to-officially-pit-joe-paterno-and-the-penn-state-football-program/602167 "2011-11-07T14:23:58Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 177
**Author:** ![elucidator](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/8edcca/32.png) [@elucidator](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/elucidator)\ **Post date:** [March 27, 2012, 2:51am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/its-time-to-officially-pit-joe-paterno-and-the-penn-state-football-program/602167/3522 "2012-03-27T02:51:57Z")
Its good for you. It builds character. ---
**Author:** ![quixotic78](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/q/3ab097/32.png) [@quixotic78](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/quixotic78)\ **Post date:** [March 27, 2012, 3:35am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/its-time-to-officially-pit-joe-paterno-and-the-penn-state-football-program/602167/3523 "2012-03-27T03:35:40Z")
I like how the guy who has been ranting about “Evidence!” hasn’t _actually talked_ to his family about his behavior on here; instead, he’s done the thought-experiment – which, wouldntyaknowit, vindicates him completely! – and that’s as good as reality. Honestly, as much as I like the phrase “cognitive dissonance,” I’m afraid it’s just too wimpy for the Herculean task of describing what’s wrong with SA. Even “delusions of grandeur” is feeble. Any suggestions for something with a little more oomph? ---
**Author:** ![Frank](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/3d9bf3/32.png) [@Frank](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Frank)\ **Post date:** [March 27, 2012, 3:48am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/its-time-to-officially-pit-joe-paterno-and-the-penn-state-football-program/602167/3524 "2012-03-27T03:48:23Z")
> [@Starving\_Artist](#): > > Mostly they are found in GQ, CS, IMHO and MPSIMS. A lot of us who post in the Pit and in GD also post in those other forums you mention. Many of the people who post in those other forums also post in the Pit and in GD. You can’t run away from what you have posted in this thread by going and hanging out in IMHO or whatever. You’ve progressed in this thread from being a garden-variety jerk, right through being an asshole, directly to infamy. There is nothing you can do on this board to retrieve even a semblance of being a regular poster. Nothing. We know what you are. ---
**Author:** ![Autolycus](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/22d042/32.png) [@Autolycus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Autolycus)\ **Post date:** [March 27, 2012, 3:48am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/its-time-to-officially-pit-joe-paterno-and-the-penn-state-football-program/602167/3525 "2012-03-27T03:48:45Z")
I dunno. But that reminds me. There is one way to get this vile thread closed, one faint hope to spare us hopeless addicts from shuffling further in this digital Limbo. We can simply start talking about something else until the mods close it for being off-topic. So, first point of order is quixotic’s word question. But, even that is a little bit too relevant. So… seen any good movies lately? ---
**Author:** ![elucidator](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/8edcca/32.png) [@elucidator](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/elucidator)\ **Post date:** [March 27, 2012, 4:02am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/its-time-to-officially-pit-joe-paterno-and-the-penn-state-football-program/602167/3526 "2012-03-27T04:02:43Z")
Saw “Boy’s Town”. Spencer Tracy was a priest. ---
**Author:** ![MsRobyn](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/90ced4/32.png) [@MsRobyn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MsRobyn)\ **Post date:** [March 27, 2012, 4:11am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/its-time-to-officially-pit-joe-paterno-and-the-penn-state-football-program/602167/3527 "2012-03-27T04:11:25Z")
> [@quixotic78](#): > > I like how the guy who has been ranting about “Evidence!” hasn’t _actually talked_ to his family about his behavior on here; instead, he’s done the thought-experiment – which, wouldntyaknowit, vindicates him completely! – and that’s as good as reality. > > Honestly, as much as I like the phrase “cognitive dissonance,” I’m afraid it’s just too wimpy for the Herculean task of describing what’s wrong with SA. Even “delusions of grandeur” is feeble. Any suggestions for something with a little more oomph? “Delusions of adequacy”? Besides that, I got nuthin’. I generally don’t dislike the people on this board. No one forces me to read it or to post to it, and I’m enough of a grown-up that I can separate the person from the post. But Starkers is a special case. Before this thread, I’d dismiss his posts because they’re generally the online equivalent of the old crank who writes letters to the editor of his local newspaper; that is, substance-free and full of references to “the good old days.” This thread really brought out the worst in him, though, and revealed himself to be the online equivalent of a dirty old man who gets off on some very sick fantasies. That’s bad enough, but then he took it miles too far, and reading this thread was like reading a private blog where every last aspect of that fantasy was spelled out. Hell, I could hear the fapping sounds in his posts, and just thinking about it is making my skin crawl. I’m glad to hear that he’s found the real world again. I really am. ---
**Author:** ![El\_Kabong](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/el_kabong/32/496_2.png) [@El\_Kabong](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/El_Kabong)\ **Post date:** [March 27, 2012, 4:27am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/its-time-to-officially-pit-joe-paterno-and-the-penn-state-football-program/602167/3528 "2012-03-27T04:27:52Z")
[Quote=Starving Artist] What finally tipped me over the edge though was a revelation that occurred in the wake of questions by posters here and on the Giraffe board as to what my family would think of my posts to this thread, and the simple fact is that while most would be in general agreement with me, all would be wondering what the hell I was doing spending so much time and effort arguing with so many profoundly dishonest and idiotic people in the first place, and I had to admit to myself that I wouldn’t have a good answer to give them. [/Quote] Most of your family would agree that your proposed experiment with the paper towel tube was a rational, necessary and compelling argument to make? I do hope you’ll forgive me if I find that statement…questionable. ---
**Author:** ![Autolycus](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/22d042/32.png) [@Autolycus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Autolycus)\ **Post date:** [March 27, 2012, 5:14am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/its-time-to-officially-pit-joe-paterno-and-the-penn-state-football-program/602167/3529 "2012-03-27T05:14:33Z")
> [@elucidator](#): > > Saw “Boy’s Town”. Spencer Tracy was a priest. I am really looking forward to getting around to watching Season 2 of Game of Thrones myself. Well, I actually need to finish Season 1 first. No spoilers please! ---
**Author:** ![elucidator](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/8edcca/32.png) [@elucidator](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/elucidator)\ **Post date:** [March 27, 2012, 7:34am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/its-time-to-officially-pit-joe-paterno-and-the-penn-state-football-program/602167/3530 "2012-03-27T07:34:20Z")
First, a plot twist. Then a major character dies in another plot twist. Then we are a thousand miles away with a whole 'nother set of major characters, in a country as yet barely mentioned, and it develops that they are likely to have a huge impact on the story line, right after the plot twist. Sooner or later, the corpsicle zombies he put on the stage in the very first pages will do something very, very significant. After another plot twist. Sorry, couldn’t help it. ---
**Author:** ![Autolycus](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/22d042/32.png) [@Autolycus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Autolycus)\ **Post date:** [March 27, 2012, 8:08am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/its-time-to-officially-pit-joe-paterno-and-the-penn-state-football-program/602167/3531 "2012-03-27T08:08:19Z")
Nooooooo!! Dammit. Thanks a lot. First the Holocaust, then Dumbledore, and now this. ---
**Author:** ![MsRobyn](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/90ced4/32.png) [@MsRobyn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MsRobyn)\ **Post date:** [March 27, 2012, 11:34am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/its-time-to-officially-pit-joe-paterno-and-the-penn-state-football-program/602167/3532 "2012-03-27T11:34:04Z")
I hate to break it to you, **Autolycus** , but at the end of _Titanic_… The ship sinks. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Enderw24](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/ba9def/32.png) [@Enderw24](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Enderw24)\ **Post date:** [March 27, 2012, 2:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/its-time-to-officially-pit-joe-paterno-and-the-penn-state-football-program/602167/3533 "2012-03-27T14:39:56Z")
> [@MsRobyn](#): > > I hate to break it to you, **Autolycus** , but at the end of _Titanic_… > > The ship sinks. > > 😃 Bad news for Gloria Stuart. Must have been the Director’s Cut. ---
**Author:** ![Nancarrow](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/c37758/32.png) [@Nancarrow](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Nancarrow)\ **Post date:** [March 27, 2012, 8:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/its-time-to-officially-pit-joe-paterno-and-the-penn-state-football-program/602167/3534 "2012-03-27T20:06:33Z")
> [@elucidator](#): > > Its good for you. It builds character. I’ve just realised - in the entire recorded history of the universe, no sentient being has ever enquired of another, whether they _would like_ to have their character built. Why is that, do you think? ---
**Author:** ![Enderw24](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/ba9def/32.png) [@Enderw24](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Enderw24)\ **Post date:** [March 27, 2012, 9:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/its-time-to-officially-pit-joe-paterno-and-the-penn-state-football-program/602167/3535 "2012-03-27T21:03:23Z")
> [@Nancarrow](#): > > I’ve just realised - in the entire recorded history of the universe, no sentient being has ever enquired of another, whether they _would like_ to have their character built. Why is that, do you think? I’ve been asked that. But I didn’t trust their dice so I did it myself. ---
**Author:** ![Autolycus](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/22d042/32.png) [@Autolycus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Autolycus)\ **Post date:** [March 28, 2012, 1:10am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/its-time-to-officially-pit-joe-paterno-and-the-penn-state-football-program/602167/3536 "2012-03-28T01:10:39Z")
Speaking of dice, if you were a D&D character, what would you be? Factotum here. (Rogues for people who like actually contributing :D). ---
**Author:** ![Una\_Persson](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/una_persson/32/346_2.png) [@Una\_Persson](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Una_Persson)\ **Post date:** [March 28, 2012, 2:02am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/its-time-to-officially-pit-joe-paterno-and-the-penn-state-football-program/602167/3537 "2012-03-28T02:02:28Z")
> [@El\_Kabong](#): > > Most of your family would agree that your proposed experiment with the paper towel tube was a rational, necessary and compelling argument to make? I do hope you’ll forgive me if I find that statement…questionable. Don’t forget very early on when he asked my “engineering” analysis of the analytical mechanics of turgid football coach penises versus quivering - yet compellingly alluring - little boy sphincters… ---
**Author:** ![elucidator](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/8edcca/32.png) [@elucidator](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/elucidator)\ **Post date:** [March 28, 2012, 3:18am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/its-time-to-officially-pit-joe-paterno-and-the-penn-state-football-program/602167/3538 "2012-03-28T03:18:19Z")
Was that when the trajectory of the shit intersected the locus of the fan? ---
**Author:** ![Autolycus](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/22d042/32.png) [@Autolycus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Autolycus)\ **Post date:** [March 28, 2012, 3:46am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/its-time-to-officially-pit-joe-paterno-and-the-penn-state-football-program/602167/3539 "2012-03-28T03:46:51Z")
> [@Una\_Persson](#): > > Don’t forget very early on when he asked my “engineering” analysis of the analytical mechanics of turgid football coach penises versus quivering - yet compellingly alluring - little boy sphincters… Please now. We are trying to stay off topic. ---
**Author:** ![EddyTeddyFreddy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/eddyteddyfreddy/32/18796_2.png) [@EddyTeddyFreddy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/EddyTeddyFreddy)\ **Post date:** [March 28, 2012, 4:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/its-time-to-officially-pit-joe-paterno-and-the-penn-state-football-program/602167/3540 "2012-03-28T16:11:09Z")
> [@Autolycus](#): > > Please now. We are trying to stay off topic. All right then, here ya go: Should I be worried that three of my cats have figured out the combination on the trigger lock of my handgun? And one of them has thumbs? :dubious: :eek: ---
**Author:** ![MsRobyn](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/90ced4/32.png) [@MsRobyn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MsRobyn)\ **Post date:** [March 28, 2012, 5:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/its-time-to-officially-pit-joe-paterno-and-the-penn-state-football-program/602167/3541 "2012-03-28T17:34:06Z")
> [@EddyTeddyFreddy](#): > > All right then, here ya go: > > Should I be worried that three of my cats have figured out the combination on the trigger lock of my handgun? And one of them has thumbs? > > :dubious: :eek: Yes. Especially if you forget to buy gooshy fud. Of course, they can also force you to buy tuna. The good kind, not the generic. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/its-time-to-officially-pit-joe-paterno-and-the-penn-state-football-program/602167.md?page=176) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/its-time-to-officially-pit-joe-paterno-and-the-penn-state-football-program/602167.md?page=178)