# It's time to officially Pit Joe Paterno and the Penn State football program. **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [November 7, 2011, 2:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/its-time-to-officially-pit-joe-paterno-and-the-penn-state-football-program/602167 "2011-11-07T14:23:58Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 253
**Author:** ![Great\_Antibob](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/e47c2d/32.png) [@Great\_Antibob](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Great_Antibob)\ **Post date:** [October 4, 2012, 3:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/its-time-to-officially-pit-joe-paterno-and-the-penn-state-football-program/602167/5043 "2012-10-04T15:43:49Z")
Why, it’s physically impossible for an average adult male to felch a goat. The spine is too rigid to allow the bending required. I can demonstrate such with this _inanimate carbon rod_… By the way, **B** , **B** , a million times **B**. ---
**Author:** ![Bambro](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/df705f/32.png) [@Bambro](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bambro)\ **Post date:** [October 4, 2012, 3:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/its-time-to-officially-pit-joe-paterno-and-the-penn-state-football-program/602167/5044 "2012-10-04T15:47:02Z")
> [@Drunky\_Smurf](#): > > Vote **E** you’re a goat felcher who is so desperate to claim that you are better than SA that you actually stopped sucking goat cocks to do something other than sucking goat cock. So which is it? Was he felching the goats or sucking their cocks? ---
**Author:** ![Bryan\_Ekers](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bryan_ekers/32/183_2.png) [@Bryan\_Ekers](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bryan_Ekers)\ **Post date:** [October 4, 2012, 4:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/its-time-to-officially-pit-joe-paterno-and-the-penn-state-football-program/602167/5045 "2012-10-04T16:03:06Z")
This thread is more amusing when Starving Artist isn’t participating. Or perhaps more accurately, his last hundred or so posts are vacuous and repetitive and can’t approach the comedy gold of his earlier material. ---
**Author:** ![JohnT](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/johnt/32/15048_2.png) [@JohnT](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/JohnT)\ **Post date:** [October 4, 2012, 4:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/its-time-to-officially-pit-joe-paterno-and-the-penn-state-football-program/602167/5046 "2012-10-04T16:08:32Z")
The tragic thing is that jokes about sucking goat cocks is far _less_ disturbing and icky than many of the posts written in earnest… ☹ ---
**Author:** ![Cheshire\_Human](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/5f8ce5/32.png) [@Cheshire\_Human](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cheshire_Human)\ **Post date:** [October 4, 2012, 4:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/its-time-to-officially-pit-joe-paterno-and-the-penn-state-football-program/602167/5047 "2012-10-04T16:10:12Z")
> [@Drain\_Bead](#): > > The university is defending Curley and Schultz because if they are ultimately convicted, it puts the university in a bad position in the inevitable rash of civil suits. It’s more likely that the university is defending them because their employment contract requires the university to defend them from any charge stemming from their official acts. In all probability, the university would rather throw them to the wolves. Oh, put me down for B in the poll. ---
**Author:** ![CannyDan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cannydan/32/548_2.png) [@CannyDan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CannyDan)\ **Post date:** [October 4, 2012, 4:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/its-time-to-officially-pit-joe-paterno-and-the-penn-state-football-program/602167/5048 "2012-10-04T16:14:52Z")
> [@Gyrate](#): > > How tall should one be to be able to felch a goat? Well, if you line up 100 goats… ---
**Author:** ![Bumbershoot](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bumbershoot/32/3428_2.png) [@Bumbershoot](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bumbershoot)\ **Post date:** [October 4, 2012, 4:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/its-time-to-officially-pit-joe-paterno-and-the-penn-state-football-program/602167/5049 "2012-10-04T16:42:01Z")
Looks like B&D are the new board memes. ---
**Author:** ![Bryan\_Ekers](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bryan_ekers/32/183_2.png) [@Bryan\_Ekers](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bryan_Ekers)\ **Post date:** [October 4, 2012, 4:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/its-time-to-officially-pit-joe-paterno-and-the-penn-state-football-program/602167/5050 "2012-10-04T16:57:08Z")
> [@Bumbershoot](#): > > Looks like B&D are the new board memes. EvilCaptor will be pleased. ---
**Author:** ![ElvisL1ves](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/5daacb/32.png) [@ElvisL1ves](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ElvisL1ves)\ **Post date:** [October 4, 2012, 5:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/its-time-to-officially-pit-joe-paterno-and-the-penn-state-football-program/602167/5051 "2012-10-04T17:00:59Z")
> [@Bumbershoot](#): > > Looks like B&D are the new board memes. Hey, I’m into Black & Decker, too! ---
**Author:** ![gamerunknown](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/6bbea6/32.png) [@gamerunknown](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/gamerunknown)\ **Post date:** [October 4, 2012, 5:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/its-time-to-officially-pit-joe-paterno-and-the-penn-state-football-program/602167/5052 "2012-10-04T17:22:54Z")
> [@ElvisL1ves](#): > > Hey, I’m into Black & Decker, too! It’s physically impossible to make a metal surface smooth enough to be used as an armbinder. They’re on different horizontal planers, see… ---
**Author:** ![Bryan\_Ekers](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bryan_ekers/32/183_2.png) [@Bryan\_Ekers](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bryan_Ekers)\ **Post date:** [October 4, 2012, 5:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/its-time-to-officially-pit-joe-paterno-and-the-penn-state-football-program/602167/5053 "2012-10-04T17:48:27Z")
Well, in an effort to update the vote total since my last vote tally (#4935): A-I have participated in the thread and I AGREE with Starving Artist’s arguments. **2, still presuming the votes of Starving Artist and NoLittlePlans** B-I have participated in the thread and I DISAGREE with Starving Artist’s arguments. **34** C-I have NOT participated in the thread and I AGREE with Starving Artist’s arguments. **0** D-I have NOT participated in the thread and I DISAGREE with Starving Artist’s arguments. **13** I’m presuming that each person has voted only once, and while Drunky Smurf’s protest “E” vote was noted, it was not tallied. At the risk of violating my unofficial election-official neutrality, if Starving Artist knows of a number of absentee voters (i.e. lurkers) who agree with him, now would be a good time to alert them the polls are open. ---
**Author:** ![Kolga](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/e56c9b/32.png) [@Kolga](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kolga)\ **Post date:** [October 4, 2012, 6:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/its-time-to-officially-pit-joe-paterno-and-the-penn-state-football-program/602167/5054 "2012-10-04T18:27:16Z")
If you’re still tallying, my vote is **B** and that Mr. Cardboard Tube is a delusional loony. ---
**Author:** ![Starving\_Artist](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/aeb1de/32.png) [@Starving\_Artist](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Starving_Artist)\ **Post date:** [October 4, 2012, 6:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/its-time-to-officially-pit-joe-paterno-and-the-penn-state-football-program/602167/5055 "2012-10-04T18:44:58Z")
> [@Bryan\_Ekers](#): > > Well, in an effort to update the vote total since my last vote tally (#4935): > > A-I have participated in the thread and I AGREE with Starving Artist’s arguments. > **2, still presuming the votes of Starving Artist and NoLittlePlans** > > B-I have participated in the thread and I DISAGREE with Starving Artist’s arguments. > **34** > > C-I have NOT participated in the thread and I AGREE with Starving Artist’s arguments. > **0** > > D-I have NOT participated in the thread and I DISAGREE with Starving Artist’s arguments. > **13** > > I’m presuming that each person has voted only once, and while Drunky Smurf’s protest “E” vote was noted, it was not tallied. > > At the risk of violating my unofficial election-official neutrality, if Starving Artist knows of a number of absentee voters (i.e. lurkers) who agree with him, now would be a good time to alert them the polls are open. All I ever said was that not everyone is necessarily in disagreement with me because there might be some who do agree but aren’t posting because they didn’t want to join the fray. Hardly a ringing declaration that there are legions of admirers out there cheering me on in silent approbation, is it? No, what this is is just more chicken shittery from the cowardly likes of **RedFury** , **Enderw24** , **Labrador Retreiver** , and, most notably, yourself, all of whom seem utterly incapable of approaching anything with even the merest modicum of integrity and honesty, but instead have chosen in this case to seek in numbers what you can’t acheive with facts, which is to prove me wrong. It won’t work, for the simple reason that it can’t work. There is no proof Paterno knew about and/or covered up for Sandusky’s raping of children, and there’s a jury acquittal of rape. Both are points I’ve argued endlessly, and both are points that are inarguable. I win. You lose. There is no refuge in numbers. ---
**Author:** ![RedFury](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/ec9cab/32.png) [@RedFury](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RedFury)\ **Post date:** [October 4, 2012, 6:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/its-time-to-officially-pit-joe-paterno-and-the-penn-state-football-program/602167/5056 "2012-10-04T18:54:05Z")
> [@Bryan\_Ekers](#): > > Well, in an effort to update the vote total since my last vote tally (#4935): > > A-I have participated in the thread and I AGREE with Starving Artist’s arguments. > **2, still presuming the votes of Starving Artist and NoLittlePlans** > > B-I have participated in the thread and I DISAGREE with Starving Artist’s arguments. > **34** > > C-I have NOT participated in the thread and I AGREE with Starving Artist’s arguments. > **0** > > D-I have NOT participated in the thread and I DISAGREE with Starving Artist’s arguments. > **13** > > I’m presuming that each person has voted only once, and while Drunky Smurf’s protest “E” vote was noted, it was not tallied. > > At the risk of violating my unofficial election-official neutrality, if Starving Artist knows of a number of absentee voters (i.e. lurkers) who agree with him, now would be a good time to alert them the polls are open. Thanks for doing this **Bryan** – adding Kolga’s recent vote we now have a 48-1 (including SA’s vote in ‘A’ is non-sensical. Of course he agrees w/himself) running tally that says **SA** is **full of manure** and **utterly delusional**. A perverted turd sandwich with legs if you will. ---
**Author:** ![Starving\_Artist](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/aeb1de/32.png) [@Starving\_Artist](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Starving_Artist)\ **Post date:** [October 4, 2012, 7:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/its-time-to-officially-pit-joe-paterno-and-the-penn-state-football-program/602167/5057 "2012-10-04T19:02:19Z")
Two quick points: a.) The “A” is not mine. b.) Some posters have expressed the belief that I sacrifice quality off-board time in order to play in this thread. This is not the case, and as I have pleasant and enjoyable off-board activities on tap for today, you’ll all be free to lie like rugs and pretend you were ever right about anything in this thread without anyone to prove you wrong until such time as I return. So enjoy yourselves all you can, just know it all goes for naught. Cheers. 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![NoLittlePlans](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/8797f3/32.png) [@NoLittlePlans](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/NoLittlePlans)\ **Post date:** [October 4, 2012, 7:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/its-time-to-officially-pit-joe-paterno-and-the-penn-state-football-program/602167/5058 "2012-10-04T19:19:30Z")
The Second Mile Sandusky Scandal: [ul] [li][“WE HAVE PICTURES”](http://bit.ly/PYSjog)[/li][/ul] ^^ Measuring floorplans and photos against Mike McQueary’s testimony. Haven’t read through it yet, but can already tell it is bound to ruffle some feathers. ---
**Author:** ![VinylTurnip](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/b2d939/32.png) [@VinylTurnip](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/VinylTurnip)\ **Post date:** [October 4, 2012, 7:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/its-time-to-officially-pit-joe-paterno-and-the-penn-state-football-program/602167/5059 "2012-10-04T19:33:40Z")
> [@Starving\_Artist](#): > > Two quick points: > > a.) The “A” is not mine. > > b.) Some posters have expressed the belief that I sacrifice quality off-board time in order to play in this thread. This is not the case, and as I have pleasant and enjoyable off-board activities on tap for today, you’ll all be free to lie like rugs and pretend you were ever right about anything in this thread without anyone to prove you wrong until such time as I return. So enjoy yourselves all you can, just know it all goes for naught. > > Cheers. 🙂 “Now I really _must_ go— it’s time for my Pablum and strained prunes, followed by a bracing yogurt enema and an hour’s soak in the electro-hydric bath!” ---
**Author:** ![Bryan\_Ekers](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bryan_ekers/32/183_2.png) [@Bryan\_Ekers](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bryan_Ekers)\ **Post date:** [October 4, 2012, 7:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/its-time-to-officially-pit-joe-paterno-and-the-penn-state-football-program/602167/5060 "2012-10-04T19:46:33Z")
> [@Starving\_Artist](#): > > All I ever said was that not everyone is necessarily in disagreement with me because there might be some who do agree but aren’t posting because they didn’t want to join the fray. > > Hardly a ringing declaration that there are legions of admirers out there cheering me on in silent approbation, is it? I don’t care how you phrase it - **C** votes are currently at zero. > [@](#): > > No, what this is is just more chicken shittery from the cowardly likes of **RedFury** , **Enderw24** , **Labrador Retreiver** , and, most notably, yourself, all of whom seem utterly incapable of approaching anything with even the merest modicum of integrity and honesty, but instead have chosen in this case to seek in numbers what you can’t acheive with facts, which is to prove me wrong. Oh, I _know_ you’re wrong, and on multiple levels, but there was some discussion about how people would vote on the issue and it seems rational to ask them and tally the results in an admittedly rough approximation of scientific inquiry, or at least more so than speculation on copulating with cardboard tubes or asking questions of a hypothetical hundred boys. > [@](#): > > It won’t work, for the simple reason that it can’t work. There is no proof Paterno knew about and/or covered up for Sandusky’s raping of children, and there’s a jury acquittal of rape. Well, there you go _again_ with trying to make specificity lie on your behalf. Whether or not Sandusky raped that specific child on that specific day, by your own admission this was the second time Paterno was informed of inappropriate (indeed, naked) activity involving Sandusky and children. Paterno did not fulfill his moral obligation to inquire and inform authorities. At best, he engaged in willful blindness which, in addition to whatever sliver of culpability one wishes to assign him for Sandusky’s continued assaults on children, ultimately proved more damaging to Penn State and its football program than dealing with the issue in 2002 would have been. > [@](#): > > There is no refuge in numbers. It seems there’s no refuge in fact, either, since you’re still here and making these same claims. ---
**Author:** ![PunditLisa](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/4af34b/32.png) [@PunditLisa](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/PunditLisa)\ **Post date:** [October 4, 2012, 7:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/its-time-to-officially-pit-joe-paterno-and-the-penn-state-football-program/602167/5061 "2012-10-04T19:51:47Z")
> [@Starving\_Artist](#): > > I win. > > You lose. The kids who were abused by Jerry Sandusky, right under Joe Paterno’s nose, actually lost. And because of its association with these two miscreants, Penn State is going to lose a whole shitload of money. I am right. You are wrong. ---
**Author:** ![Bryan\_Ekers](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bryan_ekers/32/183_2.png) [@Bryan\_Ekers](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bryan_Ekers)\ **Post date:** [October 4, 2012, 7:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/its-time-to-officially-pit-joe-paterno-and-the-penn-state-football-program/602167/5062 "2012-10-04T19:58:06Z")
> [@NoLittlePlans](#): > > The Second Mile Sandusky Scandal: > [ul] > [li][“WE HAVE PICTURES”](http://bit.ly/PYSjog)[/li][/ul] > > ^^ Measuring floorplans and photos against Mike McQueary’s testimony. > > Haven’t read through it yet, but can already tell it is bound to ruffle some feathers. I gather the gist of the essay is supposed to be: -McQueary couldn’t have seen what he claims, given the layout of the facilities -Even if McQueary saw _something_, his descriptions have varied somewhat over the years, with discrepancies between what is generally agreed he told Paterno, Curley and Schultz in 2002 and what he later testified to in various court proceedings in 2010-12. When you do manage to read it through, please let me know if either of the above (or some third result) is your impression. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/its-time-to-officially-pit-joe-paterno-and-the-penn-state-football-program/602167.md?page=252) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/its-time-to-officially-pit-joe-paterno-and-the-penn-state-football-program/602167.md?page=254)