# It's upsetting when other whites reveal their racism to me. **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [March 20, 2012, 1:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/its-upsetting-when-other-whites-reveal-their-racism-to-me/616307 "2012-03-20T13:41:14Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 6
**Author:** ![mister\_nyx](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/df705f/32.png) [@mister\_nyx](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/mister_nyx)\ **Post date:** [March 21, 2012, 3:12am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/its-upsetting-when-other-whites-reveal-their-racism-to-me/616307/101 "2012-03-21T03:12:40Z")
> [@Rand\_Rover](#): > > I’m not sure I completely understand your post. It is not the case that I’m finding fault with the OP for not being a racist. I’m finding fault with the OP for wanting to get a pat on the head for not being a racist. How dare a white guy pretend not to be racist? I mean, obviously he’s not upset because he’s _actually_ not racist. I’m certain that deep down he’s just like me. ---
**Author:** ![Rand\_Rover](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/db5fbb/32.png) [@Rand\_Rover](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rand_Rover)\ **Post date:** [March 21, 2012, 3:17am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/its-upsetting-when-other-whites-reveal-their-racism-to-me/616307/102 "2012-03-21T03:17:00Z")
> [@mister\_nyx](#): > > How dare a white guy pretend not to be racist? I mean, obviously he’s not upset because he’s _actually_ not racist. I’m certain that deep down he’s just like me. Ah, turns out I understood your post perfectly then. You are an idiot. ---
**Author:** ![mister\_nyx](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/df705f/32.png) [@mister\_nyx](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/mister_nyx)\ **Post date:** [March 21, 2012, 3:19am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/its-upsetting-when-other-whites-reveal-their-racism-to-me/616307/103 "2012-03-21T03:19:13Z")
> [@Rand\_Rover](#): > > Ah, turns out I understood your post perfectly then. You are an idiot. Says the guy who is certain that the only reason someone would be upset at racism is that they’re faking, and are actually fine with it, but want to win brownie points from some imaginary authority. ---
**Author:** ![DoctorJ](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/doctorj/32/2904_2.png) [@DoctorJ](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DoctorJ)\ **Post date:** [March 21, 2012, 3:20am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/its-upsetting-when-other-whites-reveal-their-racism-to-me/616307/104 "2012-03-21T03:20:45Z")
This happened to me all the time when I first moved to my little town in the backwoods. They figured that a white professional guy in the sticks (who grew up in nearby sticks) felt the same way they did about the black and brown people. I perfected a “what the fuck is wrong with you” look that usually ended it. At this point I think I’ve established myself as enough of a godless hippie liberal that I don’t hear much of that shit anymore. ---
**Author:** ![kaylasdad99](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kaylasdad99/32/3398_2.png) [@kaylasdad99](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kaylasdad99)\ **Post date:** [March 21, 2012, 6:32am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/its-upsetting-when-other-whites-reveal-their-racism-to-me/616307/105 "2012-03-21T06:32:53Z")
Y’know **Rand Rover** , if you were the late (and unlamented) **Carol Stream** , you could go off on a rant about how a PIT thread that the OP expects to garner only supportive, attaboy, me-too, pat-on-the-head, “have a cookie” responses should really be placed in MPSIMS.\* When I read the title of the thread, I immediately thought of Timothy Hutton’s performance in the film _Q and A_, where earlier in the story he was taken aback when learning that his ex girlfriend is now involved with a Hispanic man. Later on, he’s wondering why the crooked cops believed he was going to let them slide, and it comes to him that because they saw that reaction of his, they assumed he was just as bigoted as they were. It can be pretty upsetting to be made to wonder if you may have done or said something that racist scum are going to interpret as meaning _“he’s one of us; we can share our bile with him.”_ I suspect something of this distress may have plagued the OP, and I don’t particularly blame him for posting about it in the Pit. I still recall the day in 1989, when I was eating in the enlisted mess at SUBASE, PH. I was sitting by myself, reading a book while I ate, and this lieutenant (jg) comes and sits down at my table and starts talking to me. Evidently he’s fulfilling one of his collateral duties as an OOD by confirming that the food is up to snuff. I wasn’t exactly thrilled to be eating dinner with an officer of any sort, but I wasn’t going to be rude and tell him to shove off, either. Plus, he’s wearing a cross on one of his collarpoints; he’s a chaplain, how bad can it be? Pretty bad. For some reason he decided to tell me about how he was trying to buy a house; he was looking at this one place that was pretty nice, _“It’s a little more than I want to spend, but I think I can Jew him down.”_ A fucking _chaplain_? :eek:😕:mad::dubious::smack:☹ I wouldn’t worry that you’d sent any racist messages, **davidm** ; just as I’m pretty sure my respectful “Good evening, sir” didn’t carry any antisemitic overtones. Sometimes dumbassery just _has_ to express itself. - Also, you would have been banned for a couple of years, so, you know, win-win. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Little\_Nemo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/little_nemo/32/3120_2.png) [@Little\_Nemo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Little_Nemo)\ **Post date:** [March 21, 2012, 7:07am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/its-upsetting-when-other-whites-reveal-their-racism-to-me/616307/106 "2012-03-21T07:07:25Z")
> [@mister\_nyx](#): > > Says the guy who is certain that the only reason someone would be upset at racism is that they’re faking, and are actually fine with it, but want to win brownie points from some imaginary authority. You have to understand there’s a mindset some people have. They can’t understand why they should care about what’s happening to other people. Black people being oppressed? I can see how that would bother black people but I’m white. Gays can’t get married? Well, I’m not gay so it doesn’t affect me. Starvation in the Third World? Not my problem. I don’t live there. They just can’t understand how somebody could care about someone else’s problems. Not just that they don’t personally care - they don’t understand the whole concept of empathy. So when somebody expresses a sense of empathy, they’re confused. They’re trying to figure out what your motive is. If you’re not a victim of racism, then you must have some other angle for opposing racism. Because why else? ---
**Author:** ![Alessan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/alessan/32/465_2.png) [@Alessan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Alessan)\ **Post date:** [March 21, 2012, 8:08am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/its-upsetting-when-other-whites-reveal-their-racism-to-me/616307/107 "2012-03-21T08:08:02Z")
Wait a minute - isn’t this the Pit, also known as the “Look at Those Assholes” forum? Since when do we need a hidden motive to criticize other people’s behavior? ---
**Author:** ![Really\_Not\_All\_That\_Bright](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/e8c25b/32.png) [@Really\_Not\_All\_That\_Bright](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Really_Not_All_That_Bright)\ **Post date:** [March 21, 2012, 1:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/its-upsetting-when-other-whites-reveal-their-racism-to-me/616307/108 "2012-03-21T13:29:42Z")
> [@Rand\_Rover](#): > > I’m not sure I completely understand your post. It is not the case that I’m finding fault with the OP for not being a racist. I’m finding fault with the OP for wanting to get a pat on the head for not being a racist. In a vacuum, you might be right. This isn’t a vacuum, and **LP** finds it personally offensive that some white people don’t hate black people. He’s not the Archie Bunker sort of racist; he’s the RAHOWA sort. ---
**Author:** ![gamerunknown](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/6bbea6/32.png) [@gamerunknown](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/gamerunknown)\ **Post date:** [March 21, 2012, 1:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/its-upsetting-when-other-whites-reveal-their-racism-to-me/616307/109 "2012-03-21T13:52:51Z")
> [@](#): > > He’s just trying to prove his bona fides and get an attaboy for not being a racist. Yeah, like those guys that are trying to get sympathy for not being forced to marry their rape victims. “Oh, you think that law is unfair? Wow, just like 90% of people on Earth!”. Pussies. ---
**Author:** ![storyteller0910](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ecae2f/32.png) [@storyteller0910](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/storyteller0910)\ **Post date:** [March 21, 2012, 2:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/its-upsetting-when-other-whites-reveal-their-racism-to-me/616307/110 "2012-03-21T14:25:17Z")
> [@Rigamarole](#): > > Does it really personally offend you that some people have negative attitudes towards groups you aren’t a part of and have no association with? Wait - can we go back to this? Is this a trick question? Assuming it’s not, the answer is: _Yes, it really does._ What now? ---
**Author:** ![Malleus\_Incus\_Stapes](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/malleus_incus_stapes/32/3293_2.png) [@Malleus\_Incus\_Stapes](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Malleus_Incus_Stapes)\ **Post date:** [March 21, 2012, 3:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/its-upsetting-when-other-whites-reveal-their-racism-to-me/616307/111 "2012-03-21T15:18:13Z")
> [@Trinopus](#): > > I was very startled when a co-worker talked about moving to Idaho… Where there aren’t so many Martians. > > I blinked stupidly, and she had to explain. “Green people. Get it?” > > I never spoke to her again (10% disgust, 90% because she moved to Idaho…) 😕😕😕 ---
**Author:** ![kaylasdad99](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kaylasdad99/32/3398_2.png) [@kaylasdad99](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kaylasdad99)\ **Post date:** [March 21, 2012, 3:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/its-upsetting-when-other-whites-reveal-their-racism-to-me/616307/112 "2012-03-21T15:19:48Z")
Seconded. ---
**Author:** ![bup](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/6bbea6/32.png) [@bup](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/bup)\ **Post date:** [March 21, 2012, 3:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/its-upsetting-when-other-whites-reveal-their-racism-to-me/616307/113 "2012-03-21T15:26:46Z")
I’m guessing green-card holders. ---
**Author:** ![Really\_Not\_All\_That\_Bright](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/e8c25b/32.png) [@Really\_Not\_All\_That\_Bright](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Really_Not_All_That_Bright)\ **Post date:** [March 21, 2012, 3:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/its-upsetting-when-other-whites-reveal-their-racism-to-me/616307/114 "2012-03-21T15:29:41Z")
> [@Malleus\_Incus\_Stapes](#): > > 😕😕😕 [This is the best I could come up with](http://www.rsdb.org/search?q=irish): > [@](#): > > The Irish were once loosely called the green race. ---
**Author:** ![Rand\_Rover](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/db5fbb/32.png) [@Rand\_Rover](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rand_Rover)\ **Post date:** [March 21, 2012, 3:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/its-upsetting-when-other-whites-reveal-their-racism-to-me/616307/115 "2012-03-21T15:46:53Z")
> [@Little\_Nemo](#): > > You have to understand there’s a mindset some people have. They can’t understand why they should care about what’s happening to other people. > > Black people being oppressed? I can see how that would bother black people but I’m white. Gays can’t get married? Well, I’m not gay so it doesn’t affect me. Starvation in the Third World? Not my problem. I don’t live there. > > They just can’t understand how somebody could care about someone else’s problems. Not just that they don’t personally care - they don’t understand the whole concept of empathy. > > So when somebody expresses a sense of empathy, they’re confused. They’re trying to figure out what your motive is. If you’re not a victim of racism, then you must have some other angle for opposing racism. Because why else? Do you think I have that mindset? If al, why don’t you accuse me directly and try to make your case instead of being coy about it? ---
**Author:** ![DianaG](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/7ab992/32.png) [@DianaG](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DianaG)\ **Post date:** [March 21, 2012, 3:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/its-upsetting-when-other-whites-reveal-their-racism-to-me/616307/116 "2012-03-21T15:55:34Z")
[QUOTE=Rigamarole] Does it really personally offend you that some people have negative attitudes towards groups you aren’t a part of and have no association with? [/QUOTE] It depends. If the group is “stupid sociopathic fucktards”, not so much. Seriously, I don’t remember you being this much of a stupid sociopathic fucktard. Have I not been paying attention, or are you off your meds or something? ---
**Author:** ![mnemosyne](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/c4cdca/32.png) [@mnemosyne](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/mnemosyne)\ **Post date:** [March 21, 2012, 4:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/its-upsetting-when-other-whites-reveal-their-racism-to-me/616307/117 "2012-03-21T16:06:30Z")
> [@Anaamika](#): > > …and her husband, a “White boy from Boston”, would be “very concerned” were she to bring home a black baby… To be fair, I think any white guy married to a white woman would be a little concerned if she were to have a black baby…genetics just generally don’t work out that way :smack: 😛 ---
**Author:** ![gamerunknown](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/6bbea6/32.png) [@gamerunknown](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/gamerunknown)\ **Post date:** [March 21, 2012, 4:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/its-upsetting-when-other-whites-reveal-their-racism-to-me/616307/118 "2012-03-21T16:19:14Z")
Maybe she meant a Green Party voter or she’s a [Goblin](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gODGcVSzh1U)? ---
**Author:** ![Anaamika](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/5f9b8f/32.png) [@Anaamika](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Anaamika)\ **Post date:** [March 21, 2012, 4:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/its-upsetting-when-other-whites-reveal-their-racism-to-me/616307/119 "2012-03-21T16:22:52Z")
> [@mnemosyne](#): > > To be fair, I think any white guy married to a white woman would be a little concerned if she were to have a black baby…genetics just generally don’t work out that way :smack: > > 😛 But that’s what I mean - it doesn’t exactly need to be said! ---
**Author:** ![mnemosyne](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/c4cdca/32.png) [@mnemosyne](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/mnemosyne)\ **Post date:** [March 21, 2012, 4:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/its-upsetting-when-other-whites-reveal-their-racism-to-me/616307/120 "2012-03-21T16:31:23Z")
> [@Anaamika](#): > > But that’s what I mean - it doesn’t exactly need to be said! I suppose it would depend on the rest of the conversation - you were there, so you know if there were racist undertones. I agree, there are times when it’s not appropriate to make comments like that. Sometimes, though, it’s just pointing out the obvious joke for cheap laughs, which is pretty much what I just did in that first post! [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/its-upsetting-when-other-whites-reveal-their-racism-to-me/616307.md?page=5) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/its-upsetting-when-other-whites-reveal-their-racism-to-me/616307.md?page=7)