# I've been posting on this board for nine years and I don't have any Doper "Friends", strange? **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [September 4, 2009, 5:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ive-been-posting-on-this-board-for-nine-years-and-i-dont-have-any-doper-friends-strange/508883 "2009-09-04T17:05:36Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![Shagnasty](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/9dc877/32.png) [@Shagnasty](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shagnasty)\ **Post date:** [September 7, 2009, 6:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ive-been-posting-on-this-board-for-nine-years-and-i-dont-have-any-doper-friends-strange/508883/41 "2009-09-07T18:19:12Z")
I have been here over 9 years and the only Dopers I know in person are former coworkers that I suggested join in the first place. I have never been to a DopeFest although I probably will the next time it comes up around this area. I have gotten a lot of nice Private Messages and a few not so nice. I have gotten pitted a bunch of times and gotten hate mail a few. It is the same as real life in other words and I enjoy it all. ---
**Author:** ![hajario](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/hajario/32/171_2.png) [@hajario](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/hajario)\ **Post date:** [September 7, 2009, 7:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ive-been-posting-on-this-board-for-nine-years-and-i-dont-have-any-doper-friends-strange/508883/42 "2009-09-07T19:55:16Z")
I have been here for a few months longer than you and I have twice as many posts and I’ve never met a Doper offline. I’ve had some off board email correspondence with a hand full of Dopers over the years and have talked to two on the phone who had asked for some help with things. There are and have been several Dopers over the years who live right in my relatively small town but we’ve never met. That’s just how I am with my online stuff. ---
**Author:** ![Ruby](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/13edae/32.png) [@Ruby](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ruby)\ **Post date:** [September 7, 2009, 8:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ive-been-posting-on-this-board-for-nine-years-and-i-dont-have-any-doper-friends-strange/508883/43 "2009-09-07T20:18:31Z")
Yep, another member of the Losers Club here. I’ve been here since late 99 early 00. Lurked for quite a while then registered. I fly mostly under the radar screen so it’s all good. ---
**Author:** ![Philster](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/13edae/32.png) [@Philster](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Philster)\ **Post date:** [September 7, 2009, 11:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ive-been-posting-on-this-board-for-nine-years-and-i-dont-have-any-doper-friends-strange/508883/44 "2009-09-07T23:54:41Z")
Pushing for 8,000 posts going back for about a decade. Never met a Doper, never been to a Dopefest and have no Doper friends. ---
**Author:** ![Serenata67](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/serenata67/32/10646_2.png) [@Serenata67](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Serenata67)\ **Post date:** [September 8, 2009, 2:40am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ive-been-posting-on-this-board-for-nine-years-and-i-dont-have-any-doper-friends-strange/508883/45 "2009-09-08T02:40:20Z")
I think, perhaps, some of the connections were formed before SD. I know there are some married couples that knew (and married) each other, but are still “friends” on SD. My fiancee is thinking of making an account… ---
**Author:** ![pulykamell](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/pulykamell/32/3166_2.png) [@pulykamell](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pulykamell)\ **Post date:** [September 8, 2009, 3:12am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ive-been-posting-on-this-board-for-nine-years-and-i-dont-have-any-doper-friends-strange/508883/46 "2009-09-08T03:12:07Z")
I don’t think it’s odd at all. I’ve been here since 2000, and I didn’t meet any dopers IRL (other than one I coincidentally worked next to at a temp job in 2004) until two years ago, and that was mostly because my SO (a doper whom I met IRL and then introduced to this board) wanted to attend a Dope get-together. I tend to avoid mixing message boards with real life friends. I don’t exactly know why, but I just don’t like doing it. There’s two other local (Chicago) message boards I belong to, one since 2002, then other since 2005, and I’ve avoided any IRL meetings with any of those. I’m not at all asocial, I just feel like I’m not really interested in making friends on message boards, although there are certainly several posters here I’m sure I’d love to have regular beers with. ---
**Author:** ![astro](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/9dc877/32.png) [@astro](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/astro)\ **Post date:** [September 8, 2009, 3:38am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ive-been-posting-on-this-board-for-nine-years-and-i-dont-have-any-doper-friends-strange/508883/47 "2009-09-08T03:38:34Z")
I’ve been here since 1999 and I’ve been to one dopefest, and they were great people, but “friends” in the social sense are usually those people you can actually interact with IRL, and I’m way too far away from most dopers to do that. Plus, this place is my mental dumpster. I post all kinds of embarrassing and personal crap here that I really don’t want impinging on my real life. I respect the hell out most of my fellow dopers, and value the info and advice I get, but this isn’t really the best place to hang out if you’re looking for a serious IRL buddy. If you’re a nice, non-controversial person you might have a shot at it, but if you romp around here and let your cynical, pissed off, snarky flag fly you aren’t going to get much play. And the ability to let that tattered flag fly is part of the reason I find this place attractive. ---
**Author:** ![ataraxy22](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ataraxy22/32/307_2.png) [@ataraxy22](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ataraxy22)\ **Post date:** [September 8, 2009, 6:05am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ive-been-posting-on-this-board-for-nine-years-and-i-dont-have-any-doper-friends-strange/508883/48 "2009-09-08T06:05:23Z")
I’ve been here 7 years or so, lurk a lot more than I post, and have never met anyone in person from here. I never really tried though. There are a lot of posters I recognize by name though and a handful whose posts I usually enjoy reading. Mostly I just ponder how **Ataraxy** grabbed my handle here before I did, which resulted in me adding numbers to my own. ---
**Author:** ![An\_Gadai](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/d6d6ee/32.png) [@An\_Gadai](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/An_Gadai)\ **Post date:** [September 8, 2009, 6:07am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ive-been-posting-on-this-board-for-nine-years-and-i-dont-have-any-doper-friends-strange/508883/49 "2009-09-08T06:07:36Z")
And here was me thinking that I was **fisha** ’s friend. The truth doth hurt. ☹ ---
**Author:** ![Sleeps\_With\_Butterflies](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/bb73d2/32.png) [@Sleeps\_With\_Butterflies](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sleeps_With_Butterflies)\ **Post date:** [September 8, 2009, 6:10am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ive-been-posting-on-this-board-for-nine-years-and-i-dont-have-any-doper-friends-strange/508883/50 "2009-09-08T06:10:30Z")
> [@Really\_Not\_All\_That\_Bright](#): > > I like to separate Dopers into “would bang” and “would bang twice”. At least you keep your categories simple and to the point ---
**Author:** ![Caprese](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/a9a28c/32.png) [@Caprese](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Caprese)\ **Post date:** [September 8, 2009, 10:50am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ive-been-posting-on-this-board-for-nine-years-and-i-dont-have-any-doper-friends-strange/508883/51 "2009-09-08T10:50:50Z")
> [@salinqmind](#): > > I’ve been a lurker mostly from Day One. Have posted on and off, sharing my brilliant insight and witty anecdotes off and on with little response. Don’t have much interest in contributing to the hundreds of responses to questions about the anus or the boobs, where the real bonding seems to take place! Oh, and I have a rare talent for killing threads stone dead! 😛 I don’t look for ‘friends’, though am pleased once in a blue moon when my comment gets a response, and just enjoy flailing away sticking in my two cents. As I am going through a really stressful time, it’s rather soothing to pass some time here, to divert my thoughts from my situation. This description pretty much fits me, too, though I did not register until '01. I have had a few email or PM exchanges with a few \*very \*nice Dopers, but mostly I’m under the radar here, and I appreciate the escapism the SD provides. I do overlap online friendships into real life, but when it comes to the Straight Dope, I’m not too worried about the Friends thing. For me, the anonymity is okay. ---
**Author:** ![fisha](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/da6949/32.png) [@fisha](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/fisha)\ **Post date:** [September 8, 2009, 1:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ive-been-posting-on-this-board-for-nine-years-and-i-dont-have-any-doper-friends-strange/508883/52 "2009-09-08T13:26:13Z")
> [@An\_Gadai](#): > > And here was me thinking that I was **fisha** ’s friend. The truth doth hurt. ☹ **Thief, Thief, Thief**. Read my post again, please. I was using the word friends in quotes to signify the friend feature on here. How could I not be friends with someone who introduces me to Guinness and toasty’s and was a TK from way back when? Plus, you could break me in two, so there’s a little fear motivation on my part, also. ---
**Author:** ![An\_Gadai](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/d6d6ee/32.png) [@An\_Gadai](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/An_Gadai)\ **Post date:** [September 8, 2009, 5:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ive-been-posting-on-this-board-for-nine-years-and-i-dont-have-any-doper-friends-strange/508883/53 "2009-09-08T17:06:15Z")
> [@fisha](#): > > **Thief, Thief, Thief**. Read my post again, please. I was using the word friends in quotes to signify the friend feature on here. > > How could I not be friends with someone who introduces me to Guinness and toasty’s and was a TK from way back when? > Plus, you could break me in two, so there’s a little fear motivation on my part, also. I probably shouldn’t have put the ☹ there as I was joking. That was a great auld evening. 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![Really\_Not\_All\_That\_Bright](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/e8c25b/32.png) [@Really\_Not\_All\_That\_Bright](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Really_Not_All_That_Bright)\ **Post date:** [September 8, 2009, 8:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ive-been-posting-on-this-board-for-nine-years-and-i-dont-have-any-doper-friends-strange/508883/54 "2009-09-08T20:34:35Z")
> [@Sleeps\_With\_Butterflies](#): > > At least you keep your categories simple and to the point Yes. Unfortunately, my system requires _giant_ pigeonholes. ---
**Author:** ![Rushgeekgirl](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/rushgeekgirl/32/3715_2.png) [@Rushgeekgirl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rushgeekgirl)\ **Post date:** [September 10, 2009, 8:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ive-been-posting-on-this-board-for-nine-years-and-i-dont-have-any-doper-friends-strange/508883/55 "2009-09-10T20:19:52Z")
I’ve been around for a very long time but I don’t think anyone even knows I’m here. ---
**Author:** ![drachillix](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/48db29/32.png) [@drachillix](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/drachillix)\ **Post date:** [September 10, 2009, 8:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ive-been-posting-on-this-board-for-nine-years-and-i-dont-have-any-doper-friends-strange/508883/56 "2009-09-10T20:45:37Z")
> [@silenus](#): > > If you started going to Dopefests, things would change. I’ve met all sorts of reprobates and retards at said fests, and I am proud to claim most of them as friends. Am I on the reprobate list or the retard list? 😃 ---
**Author:** ![MeanOldLady](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/meanoldlady/32/10737_2.png) [@MeanOldLady](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MeanOldLady)\ **Post date:** [September 10, 2009, 8:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ive-been-posting-on-this-board-for-nine-years-and-i-dont-have-any-doper-friends-strange/508883/57 "2009-09-10T20:49:46Z")
I don’t fraternize with anyone from this board outside of this board. Actually, I take that back. I’ve met and IMed with one person from here, but I hate him. Are you reading this? Hi! ---
**Author:** ![Ichini\_Sanshigo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/d9b06d/32.png) [@Ichini\_Sanshigo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ichini_Sanshigo)\ **Post date:** [September 10, 2009, 9:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ive-been-posting-on-this-board-for-nine-years-and-i-dont-have-any-doper-friends-strange/508883/58 "2009-09-10T21:45:51Z")
I’m too much of a lurker, and when I do post, it’s not particularly controversial or anything. I’m just a face in the crowds (“rabble rabble”). ---
**Author:** ![Poysyn](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/f4b2a3/32.png) [@Poysyn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Poysyn)\ **Post date:** [September 11, 2009, 12:26am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ive-been-posting-on-this-board-for-nine-years-and-i-dont-have-any-doper-friends-strange/508883/59 "2009-09-11T00:26:21Z")
Total loser here too, member for nine years and don’t really know anyone on here personally. I used to know a few people, Mr. Cynical, Swiddles, Satan, Matt\_Mcl, Bobkitty, but not really anyone now. No DopeFests in my area because there aren’t enough of them in my area. Sigh. ---
**Author:** ![Brainiac](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/8797f3/32.png) [@Brainiac](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Brainiac)\ **Post date:** [September 11, 2009, 12:51am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ive-been-posting-on-this-board-for-nine-years-and-i-dont-have-any-doper-friends-strange/508883/60 "2009-09-11T00:51:33Z")
> [@SHAKES](#): > > It does seem a little strange to me that in nine years I haven’t befriended at least ONE of you guys. Maybe it’s the name SHAKES. Reminds me of my D.T.s. In my case I don’t have any friends because I only hang out with other equally sized brains and Cecil is a recluse. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ive-been-posting-on-this-board-for-nine-years-and-i-dont-have-any-doper-friends-strange/508883.md?page=2) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ive-been-posting-on-this-board-for-nine-years-and-i-dont-have-any-doper-friends-strange/508883.md?page=4)