# I've been working here for fifteen years! I have benefits! **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [May 24, 2010, 7:08am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ive-been-working-here-for-fifteen-years-i-have-benefits/540546 "2010-05-24T07:08:43Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 6
**Author:** ![Gfactor](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/9de053/32.png) [@Gfactor](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gfactor)\ **Post date:** [May 24, 2010, 11:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ive-been-working-here-for-fifteen-years-i-have-benefits/540546/101 "2010-05-24T23:45:34Z")
> [@Miller](#): > > Racial slurs are a different issue, and may be subject to moderator action. However, the case for “coont” as a racial slur is not sufficiently strong to warrant intervention. Not that \*\*Miller \*\*needs my help here, but that’s how I see it too. ---
**Author:** ![billfish678](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/7bcc69/32.png) [@billfish678](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/billfish678)\ **Post date:** [May 24, 2010, 11:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ive-been-working-here-for-fifteen-years-i-have-benefits/540546/102 "2010-05-24T23:52:45Z")
Cue sports chant music Whooo leetttt the coonts out!!! coont coont…coont coont Whooo lettttt the coonts out!!! coont coont…coon coont Just enjoying it while I can, cause eventually I coont. ---
**Author:** ![fubbleskag](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/c2a13f/32.png) [@fubbleskag](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/fubbleskag)\ **Post date:** [May 25, 2010, 12:08am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ive-been-working-here-for-fifteen-years-i-have-benefits/540546/103 "2010-05-25T00:08:31Z")
> [@Guinastasia](#): > > It’s not a bookstore, but I’ll bet he ends up on [Acts of Gord](http://www.actsofgord.com/) a LOT. True story: I “worked” in one of The Gord’s first stores. ---
**Author:** ![alice\_in\_wonderland](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/alice_in_wonderland/32/176_2.png) [@alice\_in\_wonderland](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/alice_in_wonderland)\ **Post date:** [May 25, 2010, 12:11am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ive-been-working-here-for-fifteen-years-i-have-benefits/540546/104 "2010-05-25T00:11:01Z")
This thread has turned positively surreal. I’m trying to imagine the mindset of someone who works as a temp worker slagging off someone who has a full time job with benefits and a retirement package. Not that there’s anything wrong with either - you need to do what you need to do, but it’s a bit like a garbage man slagging off Justin Timberlake 'cus Timberlake’s job isn’t glamourous enough. Uh, ok. ---
**Author:** ![OneChance](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/74df32/32.png) [@OneChance](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/OneChance)\ **Post date:** [May 25, 2010, 12:26am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ive-been-working-here-for-fifteen-years-i-have-benefits/540546/105 "2010-05-25T00:26:31Z")
> [@Stan\_Shmenge](#): > > (tell em’ I don’t give a fuck…) Slim Shady does not give a fuck what you think Of course you care. Why else would you tell your story? If you didn’t give a fuck what people think, you wouldn’t tell anyone anything. ---
**Author:** ![Frank](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/3d9bf3/32.png) [@Frank](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Frank)\ **Post date:** [May 25, 2010, 2:04am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ive-been-working-here-for-fifteen-years-i-have-benefits/540546/106 "2010-05-25T02:04:04Z")
> [@OneChance](#): > > Of course you care. Why else would you tell your story? If you didn’t give a fuck what people think, you wouldn’t tell anyone anything. He’s just driving around with his windows down and his system up. ---
**Author:** ![Michael\_Ellis](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/977dab/32.png) [@Michael\_Ellis](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Michael_Ellis)\ **Post date:** [May 25, 2010, 2:14am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ive-been-working-here-for-fifteen-years-i-have-benefits/540546/107 "2010-05-25T02:14:50Z")
> [@Stan\_Shmenge](#): > > Yes, thank you bitch for that info. You have been working at Barnes & Noble for FIFTEEN YEARS! God is that fucking sad. > > I am sorry that you overheard a PRIVATE CONVERSATION between my girlfriend, where I referred, correctly, after you guys totally fucked up her transaction, to people that work in shitty positions in retail as LOSERS! > > BUT I WORKED HERE FOR FIFTEEN YEARS! I HAVE BENEFITS! I HAVE RETIREMENT! > > Yes, you are a loser. If I worked at Barnes & Noble for fifteen years, I would shoot myself in the fucking head with a gun. Have you checked the stock price of B&N lately? Borders is about to go tits up, and you guys are next. Good luck with that retirement plan! > > So throw me out. Call security. You are still a fucking loser. Sorry, bitch! You’re a real piece of shit. ---
**Author:** ![Candyman74](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/ad7895/32.png) [@Candyman74](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Candyman74)\ **Post date:** [May 25, 2010, 4:24am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ive-been-working-here-for-fifteen-years-i-have-benefits/540546/108 "2010-05-25T04:24:37Z")
> [@olivesmarch4th](#): > > Is there a reason we’re dancing around this? It’s a contraction of ‘‘coon’’ and '‘cunt.’. I’ll give him the benefit of the doubt on that one because the post linked to above (where we find out he has a temp job in a grocery store) makes it clear he lives in the UK where “coon” is not a common word, but the Scottish pronounce “cunt” as “coont”. But insulting someone within earshot and then blaming _them_ for overhearing it and daring defend themselves? Nope, no benefit of the doubt on that one! ---
**Author:** ![Thudlow\_Boink](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/thudlow_boink/32/320_2.png) [@Thudlow\_Boink](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Thudlow_Boink)\ **Post date:** [May 25, 2010, 4:39am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ive-been-working-here-for-fifteen-years-i-have-benefits/540546/109 "2010-05-25T04:39:00Z")
> [@Airman\_Doors\_USAF](#): > > What else would you shoot yourself in the head with? A tree? A boat? I’m picturing **Stan Shmenge** standing in a Barnes & Noble, trying to shoot himself in the head with a bow & arrow. Probably the kind of arrow with a suction cup on the tip. > [@Hal\_Briston](#): > > [QUOTE=Stan Shmenge] > I am sorry that you overheard a PRIVATE CONVERSATION between my girlfriend,… Private or not, if you’re going to stand in a store having a conversation with your right hand, you’re going to attract attention. [/QUOTE] Ooooooooooh! 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![SoulFrost](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/f07891/32.png) [@SoulFrost](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SoulFrost)\ **Post date:** [May 25, 2010, 9:17am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ive-been-working-here-for-fifteen-years-i-have-benefits/540546/110 "2010-05-25T09:17:05Z")
So where’s the prick? ETA: If you’re ashamed because you’ve realized that you’re the asshole of the situation, half-a-dozen white roses and an apology would unexpectedly brighten _someone’s_ day. ---
**Author:** ![kambuckta](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/53a042/32.png) [@kambuckta](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kambuckta)\ **Post date:** [May 25, 2010, 10:18am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ive-been-working-here-for-fifteen-years-i-have-benefits/540546/111 "2010-05-25T10:18:57Z")
> [@SoulFrost](#): > > So where’s the prick? > ETA: If you’re ashamed because you’ve realized that you’re the asshole of the situation, half-a-dozen white roses and an apology would unexpectedly brighten _someone’s_ day. Hey, nice. I like that **SoulFrost.** 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![Marley23](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/45deac/32.png) [@Marley23](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Marley23)\ **Post date:** [May 25, 2010, 11:09am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ive-been-working-here-for-fifteen-years-i-have-benefits/540546/112 "2010-05-25T11:09:04Z")
> [@Candyman74](#): > > I’ll give him the benefit of the doubt on that one because the post linked to above (where we find out he has a temp job in a grocery store) makes it clear he lives in the UK where “coon” is not a common word, but the Scottish pronounce “cunt” as “coont”. Where do you get that? He talks about working in a grocery store that’s expanding in California and other Western U.S. states. So considering that, [and the lovely sentiments he expressed here](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?p=12196956&highlight=california#post12196956), there’s no reason to think he’s turned Scottish all of a sudden. ---
**Author:** ![billfish678](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/7bcc69/32.png) [@billfish678](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/billfish678)\ **Post date:** [May 25, 2010, 1:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ive-been-working-here-for-fifteen-years-i-have-benefits/540546/113 "2010-05-25T13:09:52Z")
> [@Marley23](#): > > Where do you get that? He talks about working in a grocery store that’s expanding in California and other Western U.S. states. So considering that, [and the lovely sentiments he expressed here](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?p=12196956&highlight=california#post12196956), there’s no reason to think he’s turned Scottish all of a sudden. So, he is not a true Scottsman? 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![Candyman74](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/ad7895/32.png) [@Candyman74](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Candyman74)\ **Post date:** [May 25, 2010, 1:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ive-been-working-here-for-fifteen-years-i-have-benefits/540546/114 "2010-05-25T13:28:52Z")
> [@Marley23](#): > > Where do you get that? He talks about working in a grocery store that’s expanding in California and other Western U.S. states. So considering that, [and the lovely sentiments he expressed here](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?p=12196956&highlight=california#post12196956), there’s no reason to think he’s turned Scottish all of a sudden. Shows that I should learn better how to read! I just saw “Tesco” (I didn’t even realised they’d started moving into the US). So - yeah, benefit of the doubt withdrawn! 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![Count\_Blucher](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/c5a1d2/32.png) [@Count\_Blucher](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Count_Blucher)\ **Post date:** [May 25, 2010, 1:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ive-been-working-here-for-fifteen-years-i-have-benefits/540546/115 "2010-05-25T13:39:31Z")
> [@Stan\_Shmenge](#): > > So throw me out. Call security. You are still a fucking loser. Am I the only one imagining Fred Derry knocking Stan through a glass display case while Homer Parish picks up a flag pin off the floor & puts it into his lapel? “Yeah, I know, ‘The Customer Is Always Right’ and I’m canned. But this customer wasn’t right, brother…” ---
**Author:** ![Really\_Not\_All\_That\_Bright](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/e8c25b/32.png) [@Really\_Not\_All\_That\_Bright](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Really_Not_All_That_Bright)\ **Post date:** [May 25, 2010, 2:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ive-been-working-here-for-fifteen-years-i-have-benefits/540546/116 "2010-05-25T14:38:35Z")
> [@Frank](#): > > He’s just driving around with his windows down and his system up. Will the real **Stan Shmenge** please stand up? > [@Thudlow\_Boink](#): > > I’m picturing **Stan Shmenge** standing in a Barnes & Noble, trying to shoot himself in the head with a bow & arrow. Probably the kind of arrow with a suction cup on the tip. There’s a character in the Hindu epic _Mahabharata_ who shoots himself in the head with a bow and arrow, sort of. His arrowhead ricochets from the wall of a building and penetrates his eye. ---
**Author:** ![ElvisL1ves](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/5daacb/32.png) [@ElvisL1ves](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ElvisL1ves)\ **Post date:** [May 25, 2010, 3:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ive-been-working-here-for-fifteen-years-i-have-benefits/540546/117 "2010-05-25T15:30:32Z")
> [@Marley23](#): > > there’s no reason to think he’s turned Scottish all of a sudden. And if he’s not Scottish, he’s CRAP! ---
**Author:** ![Gyrate](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/gyrate/32/3588_2.png) [@Gyrate](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gyrate)\ **Post date:** [May 25, 2010, 3:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ive-been-working-here-for-fifteen-years-i-have-benefits/540546/118 "2010-05-25T15:55:00Z")
> [@Count\_Blucher](#): > > “Yeah, I know, ‘The Customer Is Always Right’ and I’m canned. But this customer wasn’t right, brother…” I’m thinking more [this](http://www.cad-comic.com/cad/20090313). ---
**Author:** ![Laudenum](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/7993a0/32.png) [@Laudenum](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Laudenum)\ **Post date:** [May 25, 2010, 3:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ive-been-working-here-for-fifteen-years-i-have-benefits/540546/119 "2010-05-25T15:58:01Z")
> [@ColdPhoenix](#): > > IME coont is Scottish/Irish for cunt. No racial connotations. I don’t think (my Irish is very poor) that there is a direct translation of cunt, but that is how Cork people say it. And some Dublin knackers. They are trying to speak English, their accents just mangle it 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Laudenum](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/7993a0/32.png) [@Laudenum](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Laudenum)\ **Post date:** [May 25, 2010, 4:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ive-been-working-here-for-fifteen-years-i-have-benefits/540546/120 "2010-05-25T16:03:37Z")
Oh, and tbh - I never got the coon thing. I’ve seen a picture of a raccoon - they have a dark band around their eyes, but aside from that they don’t look black. Is the joke that they steal? And finally, how bad an insult is coon? [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ive-been-working-here-for-fifteen-years-i-have-benefits/540546.md?page=5) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ive-been-working-here-for-fifteen-years-i-have-benefits/540546.md?page=7)