# I've found my future assisted living facility **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [May 12, 2015, 1:33am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ive-found-my-future-assisted-living-facility/719824 "2015-05-12T01:33:47Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 11\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Spiderman](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/spiderman/32/230_2.png) [@Spiderman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Spiderman)\ **Post date:** [May 12, 2015, 1:33am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ive-found-my-future-assisted-living-facility/719824/1 "2015-05-12T01:33:47Z")
[Booze & hookers!](http://www.nbcphiladelphia.com/news/local/Elderly-Prostitute-Bed-Housing-Subsidy-303308321.html) A man in his 70’s lost his county subsidiary at the assisted living facility after they “found a prostitute underneath his bed.” The “man was a ‘more mobile gentleman’ who went on booze runs for his neighbors” & “paid prostitutes using profits earned from peddling alcohol to fellow residents.” Bootlegging booze to pay for a little sumpin’ sumpin’. Rock it, Gramps! 🆒 ---
**Author:** ![Lucretia](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/13edae/32.png) [@Lucretia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lucretia)\ **Post date:** [May 12, 2015, 9:39am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ive-found-my-future-assisted-living-facility/719824/2 "2015-05-12T09:39:48Z")
Rage, rage against the dying of the light. You go, old man. ---
**Author:** ![Finagle](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/b19c9b/32.png) [@Finagle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Finagle)\ **Post date:** [May 12, 2015, 3:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ive-found-my-future-assisted-living-facility/719824/3 "2015-05-12T15:57:38Z")
> [@Spiderman](#): > > [Booze & hookers!](paid prostitutes using profits earned from peddling alcohol to fellow residents) > > A man in his 70’s lost his county subsidiary at the assisted living facility after they “found a prostitute underneath his bed.” “I’ll just start my own rest home! With blackjack and hookers! In fact, forget the rest home!” ---
**Author:** ![LSLGuy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lslguy/32/5813_2.png) [@LSLGuy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/LSLGuy)\ **Post date:** [May 12, 2015, 4:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ive-found-my-future-assisted-living-facility/719824/4 "2015-05-12T16:49:17Z")
The OP’s link doesn’t work. He pasted the title, not the url. Oops. Hurray for the old guy. Now I’ve got something else to look forward to and an idea for a late-retirement second career. ---
**Author:** ![Robert163](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/4af34b/32.png) [@Robert163](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Robert163)\ **Post date:** [May 12, 2015, 5:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ive-found-my-future-assisted-living-facility/719824/5 "2015-05-12T17:08:00Z")
actually, that sounds like very disruptive behavior for any living facility ---
**Author:** ![Honey](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/honey/32/5074_2.png) [@Honey](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Honey)\ **Post date:** [May 12, 2015, 5:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ive-found-my-future-assisted-living-facility/719824/6 "2015-05-12T17:31:02Z")
> [@Robert163](#): > > actually, that sounds like very disruptive behavior for any living facility Party pooper. 😉 ---
**Author:** ![Spiderman](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/spiderman/32/230_2.png) [@Spiderman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Spiderman)\ **Post date:** [May 12, 2015, 7:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ive-found-my-future-assisted-living-facility/719824/7 "2015-05-12T19:25:14Z")
> [@LSLGuy](#): > > The OP’s link doesn’t work. He pasted the title, not the url. Oops. > > Hurray for the old guy. Now I’ve got something else to look forward to and an idea for a late-retirement second career. [mea culpa](http://www.nbcphiladelphia.com/news/local/Elderly-Prostitute-Bed-Housing-Subsidy-303308321.html) ---
**Author:** ![lieu](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/c2a13f/32.png) [@lieu](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lieu)\ **Post date:** [May 12, 2015, 7:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ive-found-my-future-assisted-living-facility/719824/8 "2015-05-12T19:36:18Z")
> [@Robert163](#): > > actually, that sounds like very disruptive behavior for any living facility YOU’RE GONNA HAVE TO SPEAK LOUDER… the widow Wilson has a shot glass over one ear and her tongue in my other! ---
**Author:** ![Infovore](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/infovore/32/420_2.png) [@Infovore](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Infovore)\ **Post date:** [May 12, 2015, 7:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ive-found-my-future-assisted-living-facility/719824/9 "2015-05-12T19:37:23Z")
Good for him! Me, I’m holding out hope that they’ll have perfected a fully functional VR holodeck by the time I’m ready for the rest home. Just park me in a corner somewhere and plug me into the Matrix, thanks. 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![Omar\_Little](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/omar_little/32/269_2.png) [@Omar\_Little](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Omar_Little)\ **Post date:** [May 12, 2015, 9:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ive-found-my-future-assisted-living-facility/719824/10 "2015-05-12T21:53:29Z")
At least it wasn’t a dead hooker he was hiding under his bed. ---
**Author:** ![Idle\_Thoughts](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/838e76/32.png) [@Idle\_Thoughts](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Idle_Thoughts)\ **Post date:** [May 13, 2015, 4:57am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ive-found-my-future-assisted-living-facility/719824/11 "2015-05-13T04:57:36Z")
Fixed the link in the OP for you.