# I've got a secret. **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [December 19, 2019, 4:39am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ive-got-a-secret/845068 "2019-12-19T04:39:25Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![carnivorousplant](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/carnivorousplant/32/3563_2.png) [@carnivorousplant](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/carnivorousplant)\ **Post date:** [December 19, 2019, 2:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ive-got-a-secret/845068/21 "2019-12-19T14:10:36Z")
> [@Beckdawrek](#): > > I have a better idea. Y’all tell me a secret each. They’ll all get jumbled up in my brain. When I am yammering no one will understand. And ‘my’ secret will get lost in the crowd. > Yep. That’s a dang good idea. > Don’t worry. Your secret will be safe with me. > Start postin’ them secrets. I’ll take notes. Okay, I kissed Betty Jablonski at the work Christmas party. ---
**Author:** ![Spiderman](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/spiderman/32/230_2.png) [@Spiderman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Spiderman)\ **Post date:** [December 19, 2019, 2:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ive-got-a-secret/845068/22 "2019-12-19T14:15:42Z")
I shot J.R.! :eek: ---
**Author:** ![Author\_Balk](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/e0b2c6/32.png) [@Author\_Balk](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Author_Balk)\ **Post date:** [December 19, 2019, 2:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ive-got-a-secret/845068/23 "2019-12-19T14:49:52Z")
When I opened that Christmas present 30 years ago, my surprise was an act. I already knew what I was getting. ---
**Author:** ![Alpha\_Twit](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/alpha_twit/32/265_2.png) [@Alpha\_Twit](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Alpha_Twit)\ **Post date:** [December 19, 2019, 2:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ive-got-a-secret/845068/24 "2019-12-19T14:57:02Z")
For being a near 50 year old never married guy with no kids, I’ve got a surprising number of plushie stuffed toys and Barbie dolls in my house. I promise you, it’s less creepy than it sounds. ---
**Author:** ![FairyChatMom](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/fairychatmom/32/21906_2.png) [@FairyChatMom](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/FairyChatMom)\ **Post date:** [December 19, 2019, 3:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ive-got-a-secret/845068/25 "2019-12-19T15:26:10Z")
Secret, huh? Well, when I needed a 6 to 8 digit pin, I used my childhood phone number. But I don’t suppose it’s really a secret now, since I haven’t worked at that place in 15 years, so the account has probably been disabled. But it \*was \*a secret. Once. ---
**Author:** ![racer72](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/racer72/32/3075_2.png) [@racer72](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/racer72)\ **Post date:** [December 19, 2019, 4:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ive-got-a-secret/845068/26 "2019-12-19T16:09:23Z")
> [@TriPolar](#): > > Shhhh. Don’t tell anyone: > > Racer X is really Speed’s brother Rex And I’m his cool uncle. ---
**Author:** ![septimus](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/septimus/32/410_2.png) [@septimus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/septimus)\ **Post date:** [December 19, 2019, 5:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ive-got-a-secret/845068/27 "2019-12-19T17:01:29Z")
My wife tells me I’ve been talking in my sleep lately. I’ve asked her to record it — if I’ve been recounting my adventures with Alexandra I’d better find out! On a happier note, she said that last night I was … _singing!_ 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![dropzone](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dropzone/32/7515_2.png) [@dropzone](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dropzone)\ **Post date:** [December 19, 2019, 5:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ive-got-a-secret/845068/28 "2019-12-19T17:12:19Z")
> [@carnivorousplant](#): > > Okay, I kissed Betty Jablonski at the work Christmas party. Oh, you must mean Nancy! No, wait, that’s Betty Jo Bialowski. Since I treat this place as my personal blog I could very well have told any of my secrets, but the way I write nobody figured it out. ---
**Author:** ![RTFirefly](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/c77e96/32.png) [@RTFirefly](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RTFirefly)\ **Post date:** [December 19, 2019, 5:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ive-got-a-secret/845068/29 "2019-12-19T17:44:15Z")
> [@septimus](#): > > My wife tells me I’ve been talking in my sleep lately. I’ve asked her to record it — if I’ve been recounting my adventures with Alexandra I’d better find out! > > On a happier note, she said that last night I was … _singing!_ 🙂 [You can’t talk in your sleep if you can’t sleep](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1oEPbcZMXRw) > [@dropzone](#): > > Oh, you must mean Nancy! No, wait, that’s Betty Jo Bialowski. You may remember her as Audrey Farber. 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![dropzone](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dropzone/32/7515_2.png) [@dropzone](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dropzone)\ **Post date:** [December 19, 2019, 6:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ive-got-a-secret/845068/30 "2019-12-19T18:08:10Z")
> [@RTFirefly](#): > > You may remember her as Audrey Farber. 🙂 Remember when a grounding in Firesign Theater was a pre-req here? ---
**Author:** ![Gatopescado](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/gatopescado/32/5711_2.png) [@Gatopescado](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gatopescado)\ **Post date:** [December 19, 2019, 6:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ive-got-a-secret/845068/31 "2019-12-19T18:15:42Z")
> [@Beckdawrek](#): > > I have a better idea. Y’all tell me a secret each. IT’S A TRAP!!! Do _not_ fall for this, Dopers! Trust me! ---
**Author:** ![Paintcharge](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/paintcharge/32/7946_2.png) [@Paintcharge](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Paintcharge)\ **Post date:** [December 19, 2019, 6:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ive-got-a-secret/845068/32 "2019-12-19T18:19:27Z")
> [@Treppenwitz](#): > > (Missed the edit: Is the US word “laps” rather than “lengths”? Still. Pretty bad, huh?) > > j A “lap” is up and back, a “length” is just that, 1 length of the pool. ---
**Author:** ![engineer\_comp\_geek](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/engineer_comp_geek/32/504_2.png) [@engineer\_comp\_geek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/engineer_comp_geek)\ **Post date:** [December 19, 2019, 7:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ive-got-a-secret/845068/33 "2019-12-19T19:09:09Z")
> [@carnivorousplant](#): > > Okay, I kissed Betty Jablonski at the work Christmas party. Oh Lord Jesus, Mr. Kowalski, what have you done? ---
**Author:** ![Beckdawrek](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/beckdawrek/32/3647_2.png) [@Beckdawrek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Beckdawrek)\ **Post date:** [December 19, 2019, 7:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ive-got-a-secret/845068/34 "2019-12-19T19:28:57Z")
> [@panache45](#): > > Just close your eyes and think of corndogs. I have corndog secrets. Oh, shit! Now I gotta worry about that, as well. 'preciate that Panache! (:)) ---
**Author:** ![RioRico](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/f04885/32.png) [@RioRico](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RioRico)\ **Post date:** [December 19, 2019, 8:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ive-got-a-secret/845068/35 "2019-12-19T20:15:21Z")
I harbor shameful secrets of jobs and pets and friends. I dare not tell. Hot slivers under fingernails, NO! Sulfuric acid on my eyelids, NO! 36 hours of Tramp speeches, NO! I can’t be coerced. No, I… oh, donuts… ---
**Author:** ![Indyellen](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/indyellen/32/4176_2.png) [@Indyellen](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Indyellen)\ **Post date:** [December 19, 2019, 9:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ive-got-a-secret/845068/36 "2019-12-19T21:08:42Z")
Here’s one, **Beck** : I’m secretly (looks around furtively) an ADULT! 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Beckdawrek](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/beckdawrek/32/3647_2.png) [@Beckdawrek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Beckdawrek)\ **Post date:** [December 19, 2019, 10:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ive-got-a-secret/845068/37 "2019-12-19T22:02:57Z")
I knew it. I knew there were adults on this board. ---
**Author:** ![Alpha\_Twit](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/alpha_twit/32/265_2.png) [@Alpha\_Twit](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Alpha_Twit)\ **Post date:** [December 19, 2019, 10:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ive-got-a-secret/845068/38 "2019-12-19T22:04:15Z")
> [@Beckdawrek](#): > > I knew it. I knew there were adults on this board. Yeah but please don’t tell anyone. ---
**Author:** ![begbert2](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/begbert2/32/3357_2.png) [@begbert2](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/begbert2)\ **Post date:** [December 19, 2019, 11:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ive-got-a-secret/845068/39 "2019-12-19T23:17:38Z")
(looks around furtively) I’m an _atheist!!_ :eek: ---
**Author:** ![dropzone](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dropzone/32/7515_2.png) [@dropzone](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dropzone)\ **Post date:** [December 20, 2019, 1:23am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ive-got-a-secret/845068/40 "2019-12-20T01:23:01Z")
> [@Beckdawrek](#): > > I have corndog secrets. Oh, shit! Now I gotta worry about that, as well. > 'preciate that Panache! > (:)) Yeah, whatever you do don’t mention them in front of your endocrinologist. :eek: [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ive-got-a-secret/845068.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ive-got-a-secret/845068.md?page=3)