# I've got bad feeling about this guy! **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [July 15, 2013, 8:58am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ive-got-bad-feeling-about-this-guy/663544 "2013-07-15T08:58:36Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![jaymac1](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/48db29/32.png) [@jaymac1](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jaymac1)\ **Post date:** [July 15, 2013, 8:58am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ive-got-bad-feeling-about-this-guy/663544/1 "2013-07-15T08:58:36Z")
I’m an 18 year old paraplegic woman, attending college. There is a guy on my course I’ve been getting to know, but lately the only reason he seems to want to talk to me is because of my disability. I’ve noticed him looking at my wheelchair and my legs (I never have them out though, it’s a wee bit chilly out) with interest, I’m suspecting he’s a devotee of paraplegics. This means that he has a sexual attraction to my paralysis but not necessarily to me as a person. I am a virgin but that is just by bad luck, should I give this bloke a chance? He is smart and good looking, and intelligent, but surely there will be some normal guy out there for me? Could anyone help me? ---
**Author:** ![FairyChatMom](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/fairychatmom/32/21906_2.png) [@FairyChatMom](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/FairyChatMom)\ **Post date:** [July 15, 2013, 10:15am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ive-got-bad-feeling-about-this-guy/663544/2 "2013-07-15T10:15:40Z")
Trust your instincts. You’re still quite young and the world is full of decent people, with some creeps mixed in. Take your time and learn how to sort them out. You don’t want to get into an intimate situation with a skeevy character… :eek: ---
**Author:** ![Sicks\_Ate](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/258eb7/32.png) [@Sicks\_Ate](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sicks_Ate)\ **Post date:** [July 15, 2013, 12:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ive-got-bad-feeling-about-this-guy/663544/3 "2013-07-15T12:49:49Z")
Umm… ---
**Author:** ![GrandWino](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/grandwino/32/67_2.png) [@GrandWino](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/GrandWino)\ **Post date:** [July 15, 2013, 1:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ive-got-bad-feeling-about-this-guy/663544/4 "2013-07-15T13:15:09Z")
Wow. Ballsy. ---
**Author:** ![Moonlitherial](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/4bbf92/32.png) [@Moonlitherial](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Moonlitherial)\ **Post date:** [July 15, 2013, 1:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ive-got-bad-feeling-about-this-guy/663544/5 "2013-07-15T13:25:46Z")
Perhaps you may want to read [this](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=656188&highlight=Umkay) thread before you continue. ---
**Author:** ![Bricker](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/977dab/32.png) [@Bricker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bricker)\ **Post date:** [July 15, 2013, 2:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ive-got-bad-feeling-about-this-guy/663544/6 "2013-07-15T14:02:53Z")
Are you good-looking, and bravely bearing up under your disability? Do you know a lot about handicap challenges and life, and are you willing to post incessantly about them? Then welcome! Have we got a (short-lived) starring role for you! ---
**Author:** ![jaymac1](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/48db29/32.png) [@jaymac1](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jaymac1)\ **Post date:** [July 15, 2013, 3:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ive-got-bad-feeling-about-this-guy/663544/7 "2013-07-15T15:27:16Z")
> [@Moonlitherial](#): > > Perhaps you may want to read [this](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=656188&highlight=Umkay) thread before you continue. What’s this about? ---
**Author:** ![jaymac1](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/48db29/32.png) [@jaymac1](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jaymac1)\ **Post date:** [July 15, 2013, 3:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ive-got-bad-feeling-about-this-guy/663544/8 "2013-07-15T15:31:15Z")
> [@Bricker](#): > > Are you good-looking, and bravely bearing up under your disability? Do you know a lot about handicap challenges and life, and are you willing to post incessantly about them? > > Then welcome! Have we got a (short-lived) starring role for you! Sure OK 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![TriPolar](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tripolar/32/3008_2.png) [@TriPolar](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TriPolar)\ **Post date:** [July 15, 2013, 3:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ive-got-bad-feeling-about-this-guy/663544/9 "2013-07-15T15:36:39Z")
> [@jaymac1](#): > > What’s this about? You sound like someone who once came in and duped a bunch of dopers. Some of them still bear scars from that incident. Even if your story is true it will be met with a lot of skepticism. ---
**Author:** ![voltaire](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/voltaire/32/313_2.png) [@voltaire](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/voltaire)\ **Post date:** [July 15, 2013, 3:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ive-got-bad-feeling-about-this-guy/663544/10 "2013-07-15T15:46:42Z")
> [@jaymac1](#): > > What’s this about? This board had a past incident with a new user whose first thread ever created was “[Should I date a devoté?](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=652284)” quickly followed by a loooong thread titled “[Ask the Girl in the Wheelchair](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=652342)” where s/he solicited and answered questions about what it’s like to be quadriplegic. It turned out s/he was a fake, faking, faker, so many people here might be a little gun-shy. If you’re really, really interested in how the whole saga played out, [this Google search of the related threads](https://www.google.com/search?q=Results&ie=utf-8&oe=utf-8&aq=t&rls=Palemoon:en-US:official&client=firefox-a&channel=rcs#client=firefox-a&hs=8v6&rls=Palemoon:en-US%3Aofficial&channel=rcs&sclient=psy-ab&q=site:straightdope.com+umkay&oq=site:straightdope.com+umkay&gs_l=serp.3...4133.4133.1.4703.1.1.0.0.0.0.154.154.0j1.1.0....0...1c.1.19.psy-ab.jK4NzxNhjIc&pbx=1&bav=on.2,or.r_qf.&bvm=bv.48705608,d.aWc&fp=a144351cce8306e3&biw=1280&bih=907) should keep you busy for a while. And, even though it was started under false pretenses, that first thread I linked above should provide you with a lot of insight and thoughts related to the situation you were asking about. ---
**Author:** ![jaymac1](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/48db29/32.png) [@jaymac1](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jaymac1)\ **Post date:** [July 15, 2013, 3:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ive-got-bad-feeling-about-this-guy/663544/11 "2013-07-15T15:47:01Z")
> [@TriPolar](#): > > You sound like someone who once came in and duped a bunch of dopers. Some of them still bear scars from that incident. Even if your story is true it will be met with a lot of skepticism. Oh right, I’ve only been reading these forums a few weeks, all seems quite innocent to me, maybe not? I’m just asking a perfectly reasonable question to what I thought would be open minder people. Maybe not. If I amnae gonna get a straight answer here I may just go to another forum, thanks for your time. ☹ ---
**Author:** ![jaymac1](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/48db29/32.png) [@jaymac1](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jaymac1)\ **Post date:** [July 15, 2013, 3:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ive-got-bad-feeling-about-this-guy/663544/12 "2013-07-15T15:53:46Z")
> [@voltaire](#): > > This board had a past incident with a new user whose first thread ever created was “[Should I date a devoté?](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=652284)” quickly followed by a loooong thread titled “[Ask the Girl in the Wheelchair](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=652342)” where s/he solicited and answered questions about what it’s like to be quadriplegic. It turned out s/he was a fake, faking, faker, so many people here might be a little gun-shy. > > If you’re really, really interested in how the whole saga played out, [this Google search of the related threads](https://www.google.com/search?q=Results&ie=utf-8&oe=utf-8&aq=t&rls=Palemoon:en-US:official&client=firefox-a&channel=rcs#client=firefox-a&hs=8v6&rls=Palemoon:en-US%3Aofficial&channel=rcs&sclient=psy-ab&q=site:straightdope.com+umkay&oq=site:straightdope.com+umkay&gs_l=serp.3...4133.4133.1.4703.1.1.0.0.0.0.154.154.0j1.1.0....0...1c.1.19.psy-ab.jK4NzxNhjIc&pbx=1&bav=on.2,or.r_qf.&bvm=bv.48705608,d.aWc&fp=a144351cce8306e3&biw=1280&bih=907) should keep you busy for a while. And, even though it was started under false pretenses, that first thread I linked above should provide you with a lot of insight and thoughts related to the situation you were asking about. The google link does nae go anywhere, but I found a thread by someone called Umkay, is this who you’re on about? I never said this guy is a devotee, I just suspect he might be from the way he acts and I have heard about these weirdo’s before, but I know little about it. If people donnae feel comfortable answering a wee question about it then OK, it’s your choice. :mad: ---
**Author:** ![jaymac1](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/48db29/32.png) [@jaymac1](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jaymac1)\ **Post date:** [July 15, 2013, 4:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ive-got-bad-feeling-about-this-guy/663544/13 "2013-07-15T16:09:27Z")
If anyone can tell me how to upload a photo I will. I’m an 18 year old girl, living in Rutherglen, near Glasgow, Scotland. I attend a local sixth form college as a student. Do you want more proof I exist? 😕 ---
**Author:** ![voltaire](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/voltaire/32/313_2.png) [@voltaire](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/voltaire)\ **Post date:** [July 15, 2013, 4:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ive-got-bad-feeling-about-this-guy/663544/14 "2013-07-15T16:18:44Z")
> [@jaymac1](#): > > The google link does nae go anywhere, but I found a thread by someone called Umkay, is this who you’re on about? > > I never said this guy is a devotee, I just suspect he might be from the way he acts and I have heard about these weirdo’s before, but I know little about it. If people donnae feel comfortable answering a wee question about it then OK, it’s your choice. :mad: Sorry if that Google link didn’t work - just plug this into Google: “site:straightdope.com umkay” …if you want the whole backstory. (Though, trust me, you don’t.) But my main point was that you should read that [Should I date a devoté?](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=652284) thread, since it quite thoughtfully explores the issues related to what you were asking about, and you’re just not gonna get similarly thoughtful responses from this crowd after all that. If you read that, and _at least some_ of the other thread I linked, I think you will come to understand why people here are being a bit cagey. ---
**Author:** ![jaymac1](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/48db29/32.png) [@jaymac1](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jaymac1)\ **Post date:** [July 15, 2013, 4:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ive-got-bad-feeling-about-this-guy/663544/15 "2013-07-15T16:21:22Z")
> [@voltaire](#): > > Sorry if that Google link didn’t work - just plug this into Google: “site:straightdope.com umkay” …if you want the whole backstory. (Though, trust me, you don’t.) > > But my main point was that you should read that [Should I date a devoté?](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=652284) thread, since it quite thoughtfully explores the issues related to what you were asking about, and you’re just not gonna get similarly thoughtful responses from this crowd after all that. If you read that, and _at least some_ of the other thread I linked, I think you will come to understand why people here are being a bit cagey. Aye, I’ve read a fair bit already on that, what an arsehole. Shame you’re all victimising me. :mad: ---
**Author:** ![GrandWino](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/grandwino/32/67_2.png) [@GrandWino](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/GrandWino)\ **Post date:** [July 15, 2013, 4:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ive-got-bad-feeling-about-this-guy/663544/16 "2013-07-15T16:22:07Z")
> [@jaymac1](#): > > If I amnae gonna get a straight answer here I may just go to another forum, thanks for your time. > ☹ Cool. ---
**Author:** ![voltaire](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/voltaire/32/313_2.png) [@voltaire](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/voltaire)\ **Post date:** [July 15, 2013, 4:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ive-got-bad-feeling-about-this-guy/663544/17 "2013-07-15T16:25:35Z")
> [@jaymac1](#): > > If anyone can tell me how to upload a photo I will. I’m an 18 year old girl, living in Rutherglen, near Glasgow, Scotland. I attend a local sixth form college as a student. Do you want more proof I exist? 😕 Skip all that - it doesn’t matter and won’t help. Refer to the link in my previous post for input on your original question, then get to know the board by reading and posting in other, hopefully unrelated threads. Anything else is unlikely to end well. ---
**Author:** ![jaymac1](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/48db29/32.png) [@jaymac1](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jaymac1)\ **Post date:** [July 15, 2013, 4:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ive-got-bad-feeling-about-this-guy/663544/18 "2013-07-15T16:26:52Z")
> [@voltaire](#): > > Skip all that - it doesn’t matter and won’t help. Refer to the link in my previous post for input on your original question, then get to know the board by reading and posting in other, hopefully unrelated threads. Anything else is unlikely to end well. Okie Dokie 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![voltaire](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/voltaire/32/313_2.png) [@voltaire](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/voltaire)\ **Post date:** [July 15, 2013, 4:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ive-got-bad-feeling-about-this-guy/663544/19 "2013-07-15T16:34:32Z")
Serious, non-snarky question, since I don’t know: Do people from Scotland actually _type_ (as opposed to _talk_) like this: “If I amnae gonna” “does nae go anywhere” “If people donnae feel” ---
**Author:** ![pancakes3](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/ba9def/32.png) [@pancakes3](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pancakes3)\ **Post date:** [July 15, 2013, 4:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ive-got-bad-feeling-about-this-guy/663544/20 "2013-07-15T16:35:40Z")
I’m not invested enough in the topic to sift through a locked, year old thread but I have to ask… Can’t someone be a “devotee” (wow, what a euphemism) to your condition as well as appreciate who you are inside? I don’t know if the analogy applies but can’t I be attracted to a great set of tits and also appreciate what the girl has to offer intellectually? I realize the “creep” vibe as well as the fact that this particular fetish might wave some warning flags but maybe the benefit of the doubt? Hanging out in a group situation to mitigate the threat level? etc.? Not worth giving this guy a shot wholesale face value because he has a wandering eye? [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ive-got-bad-feeling-about-this-guy/663544.md?page=2)