# I've read the bible...... **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [March 29, 2011, 9:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ive-read-the-bible/576430 "2011-03-29T21:14:03Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![RealityChuck](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/realitychuck/32/195_2.png) [@RealityChuck](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RealityChuck)\ **Post date:** [March 29, 2011, 11:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ive-read-the-bible/576430/21 "2011-03-29T23:37:45Z")
Actually, I’ve never actually read it. The prose style puts me off. I occasionally look up a verse, but never felt and desire to read anything. ---
**Author:** ![DCnDC](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dcndc/32/2842_2.png) [@DCnDC](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DCnDC)\ **Post date:** [March 29, 2011, 11:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ive-read-the-bible/576430/22 "2011-03-29T23:41:14Z")
BTW, mandatory _Simpsons_ quote: > [@](#): > > Oh, everything’s too damned expensive these days. Like this Bible. It cost 15 bucks! And talk about a preachy book! _ **Everybody’s** _ a sinner! Except this guy. ---
**Author:** ![Chronos](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/chronos/32/134_2.png) [@Chronos](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chronos)\ **Post date:** [March 29, 2011, 11:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ive-read-the-bible/576430/23 "2011-03-29T23:45:28Z")
I haven’t read it cover to cover _per se_, but I don’t think there’s any portion of it which I haven’t read piecemeal, so I checked off the “cover to cover” option. ---
**Author:** ![Skald\_the\_Rhymer](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ecccb3/32.png) [@Skald\_the\_Rhymer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Skald_the_Rhymer)\ **Post date:** [March 29, 2011, 11:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ive-read-the-bible/576430/24 "2011-03-29T23:46:30Z")
I’ve read the narrated parts in toto, I think; that is, I skip over the census-taking bits in the Old Testament. That’s why I’m not a Christian, incidentally. How you can read the Bible and pay attention and not think the Old Testament God is a monster is beyond me. ---
**Author:** ![Simplicio](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/c37758/32.png) [@Simplicio](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Simplicio)\ **Post date:** [March 29, 2011, 11:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ive-read-the-bible/576430/25 "2011-03-29T23:48:32Z")
When I was a kid, I got stuck in a really boring Sunday School class, so I’d sit in the back every weekend and read the bible cover-to-cover just for something to do. I found it pretty interesting, even at that age. Granted the lack of anything else to do for two hours probably helped. ---
**Author:** ![OpalCat](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/8edcca/32.png) [@OpalCat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/OpalCat)\ **Post date:** [March 30, 2011, 12:02am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ive-read-the-bible/576430/26 "2011-03-30T00:02:27Z")
There isn’t a choice for “was forced to read way too much of it, wished I’d never read any” ---
**Author:** ![congodwarf](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/e36b37/32.png) [@congodwarf](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/congodwarf)\ **Post date:** [March 30, 2011, 12:09am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ive-read-the-bible/576430/27 "2011-03-30T00:09:52Z")
I’ve read many kid bibles because they’re like myths. I don’t mean that in an insulting way. They’re interesting stories, written in a memorable way, concerning a religion I don’t follow or believe in. As stories go, they’re pretty good and even now, when faced with a People magazine or a kid bible, I’ll pick the kid bible. As for the real bible - I’ve read the first 2 pages of Genesis. ---
**Author:** ![Malleus\_Incus\_Stapes](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/malleus_incus_stapes/32/3293_2.png) [@Malleus\_Incus\_Stapes](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Malleus_Incus_Stapes)\ **Post date:** [March 30, 2011, 12:23am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ive-read-the-bible/576430/28 "2011-03-30T00:23:11Z")
> [@Skald\_the\_Rhymer](#): > > That’s why I’m not a Christian, incidentally. How you can read the Bible and pay attention and not think the Old Testament God is a monster is beyond me. Is that a request for a GD discussion? There’s this big leather English/Hebrew _Tanakh_ in my family library, and in nineth grade I decided I should at least read my entire holy book. It took me quite some time, and it wasn’t exactly deep study, but I did finish it cover to cover. Then I made a list of some of the really random parts that no one knows about and went around telling everyone. ("Didja know the Shunamite woman turns up again a few chapters after her son is revived?.. blah blah blah …and Gahazi is like, ‘Hey! That’s the lady I was just telling you about!’ ") ---
**Author:** ![elfkin477](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/a9a28c/32.png) [@elfkin477](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/elfkin477)\ **Post date:** [March 30, 2011, 12:34am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ive-read-the-bible/576430/29 "2011-03-30T00:34:43Z")
I’ve read the entire OT a couple of times, but I don’t think I’ve ever made it all the way through the NT. Too many “this is what I thought happened” bits. ---
**Author:** ![Autolycus](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/22d042/32.png) [@Autolycus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Autolycus)\ **Post date:** [March 30, 2011, 12:41am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ive-read-the-bible/576430/30 "2011-03-30T00:41:04Z")
Read it? Hell, I wrote it! ---
**Author:** ![Crown\_Prince\_of\_Irony](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/ed655f/32.png) [@Crown\_Prince\_of\_Irony](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Crown_Prince_of_Irony)\ **Post date:** [March 30, 2011, 12:43am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ive-read-the-bible/576430/31 "2011-03-30T00:43:14Z")
I read it cover to cover twice as a kid - the second time probably nudged me down the path toward atheism, as I was about 13 at the time and developing some sense of critical thinking. I’ve tried to read it as an adult, but always lose interest around Chronicles. ---
**Author:** ![Shagnasty](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/9dc877/32.png) [@Shagnasty](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shagnasty)\ **Post date:** [March 30, 2011, 12:45am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ive-read-the-bible/576430/32 "2011-03-30T00:45:05Z")
I wonder what the percentage is of the people is that have read the whole Bible. I would guess way less than 1% but I could be wrong. In all the churches I have ever attended, we only went over certain books and verses. The New Testament was obviously covered way more than the Old Testament but we did go over Genesis and Exodus in detail many times over. I have to say, the Bible as a whole is one badly written and edited collection of books regardless of your religious beliefs. It is almost impossible to read cover to cover and make any sense of anything and it throws some curveballs at you too if you are paying attention. ---
**Author:** ![Gleena](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/b3f665/32.png) [@Gleena](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gleena)\ **Post date:** [March 30, 2011, 12:47am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ive-read-the-bible/576430/33 "2011-03-30T00:47:12Z")
I’m not quite sure what to pick - I’ve read it cover to cover (although usually as one normally reads it, in sections you’re studying, and occasionally all the way through) in at least three versions numerous times. Including writing papers on the begats. I used a Thompson Chain and various textbooks to study it. I have most of a minor in theology from a Christian university. I have also been an atheist for almost 20 years, and haven’t really picked it up at all since unless making a point in conversation on various (other) message boards. It’s been so long now and I have so much of a skeptical, anti-theist, atheist filter between me now and me then, that I can’t really say I have the knowledge anymore that would be implied by my answer. I literally have done no more than a cursory search to find the wording of a verse in that time. So there you go. ---
**Author:** ![Xavier\_Breath](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/x/76d3ee/32.png) [@Xavier\_Breath](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Xavier_Breath)\ **Post date:** [March 30, 2011, 12:48am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ive-read-the-bible/576430/34 "2011-03-30T00:48:41Z")
Cover-to-cover in the New International Version, New King James Version, David Stern’s translation, The Message (Eugene Peterson’s), and The Revised Standard Version. Greek NT straight thru a couple of times. Small town, not much to do in the evenings… ---
**Author:** ![Diogenes\_the\_Cynic](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e99b99/32.png) [@Diogenes\_the\_Cynic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Diogenes_the_Cynic)\ **Post date:** [March 30, 2011, 12:51am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ive-read-the-bible/576430/35 "2011-03-30T00:51:46Z")
Cover to cover twice, once formally and systematically in college (being tested on every book of both Testaments), once again informally. I’ve read several individual books multiple times beyond that, and have tried to muddle through the Gospels in the original Greek. There are a couple of books I have found it difficult to read very closely without my eyes glazing over, namely Deuteronomy amd Leviticus. I skimmed those even in college. ---
**Author:** ![wonky](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/wonky/32/393_2.png) [@wonky](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/wonky)\ **Post date:** [March 30, 2011, 1:12am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ive-read-the-bible/576430/36 "2011-03-30T01:12:47Z")
Cover to cover once in mandatory theology class at university. Piecemeal exposure every week for however many years before that: First reading, psalm, second reading, gospel, cha cha cha. ---
**Author:** ![Aji\_de\_Gallina](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/aji_de_gallina/32/260_2.png) [@Aji\_de\_Gallina](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Aji_de_Gallina)\ **Post date:** [March 30, 2011, 1:17am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ive-read-the-bible/576430/37 "2011-03-30T01:17:56Z")
Twice cover-to-cover. My Bible has a read-it-daily plan to read it in a year. I’d guess if I added all the parts I’ve read here and there it would add up to a couple of times more. Of course, Sunday mass always gives you a fix. I’ve read Kings and Samuel a gazillion times ---
**Author:** ![SecondJudith](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/b5ac83/32.png) [@SecondJudith](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SecondJudith)\ **Post date:** [March 30, 2011, 10:17am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ive-read-the-bible/576430/38 "2011-03-30T10:17:59Z")
> [@Skald\_the\_Rhymer](#): > > How you can read the Bible and pay attention and not think the Old Testament God is a monster is beyond me. Thanks for ripping on the critical thinking skills of millions of Jewish people. ---
**Author:** ![Wheelz](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/wheelz/32/5718_2.png) [@Wheelz](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Wheelz)\ **Post date:** [March 30, 2011, 12:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ive-read-the-bible/576430/39 "2011-03-30T12:45:17Z")
I participate in an annual Trivia Night which consists of ten themed rounds of ten questions each. One of the rounds is always Bible trivia, and my team always gets slammed in that round. Last year we were leading by two points going into the final round (Bible, of course), and ended up in third. So I downloaded a free Bible onto my Kindle and figured I could gradually work through it by the next Trivia Night, and we might have a fighting chance at getting a few questions right. That was four months ago and I’m still not done with Genesis. God, it’s boring. ---
**Author:** ![kayaker](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kayaker/32/441_2.png) [@kayaker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kayaker)\ **Post date:** [March 30, 2011, 12:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ive-read-the-bible/576430/40 "2011-03-30T12:58:13Z")
Once I start a book, I almost always finish it, no matter how bad I think it is. Except for the bible. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ive-read-the-bible/576430.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ive-read-the-bible/576430.md?page=3)