# Jack Batty: Home Owner **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [March 11, 2013, 8:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/jack-batty-home-owner/652655 "2013-03-11T20:52:33Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Jack\_Batty](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jack_batty/32/3201_2.png) [@Jack\_Batty](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jack_Batty)\ **Post date:** [March 11, 2013, 8:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/jack-batty-home-owner/652655/1 "2013-03-11T20:52:33Z")
So, last week my sister (the real estate agent) threw me a bone and got me into look at house that was just about to go on the market. It’s a small house – a little modular ranch with a two car garage and a finished basement on 1/2 acre – and on a whim, I put in an offer. Then it went on the market and someone offered more. Couple that with the fact that last week at work stresses were getting the better of me and I had a minor melt-down - to the point where I wasn’t sure if I would even have a job past the weekend … and I was somewhat relieved to have gotten shot down. Cut to today: the woman who put in the original offer backed out; I re-submitted my offer and the fools accepted it. What the fuck have I gotten myself into now? ---
**Author:** ![Chefguy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/chefguy/32/138_2.png) [@Chefguy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chefguy)\ **Post date:** [March 11, 2013, 8:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/jack-batty-home-owner/652655/2 "2013-03-11T20:55:25Z")
A 30-year money pit. ---
**Author:** ![not\_what\_you\_d\_expect](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/not_what_you_d_expect/32/3246_2.png) [@not\_what\_you\_d\_expect](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/not_what_you_d_expect)\ **Post date:** [March 11, 2013, 9:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/jack-batty-home-owner/652655/3 "2013-03-11T21:59:57Z")
Congratulations. Owning a home can be a lot of work, but also a lot of fun. And good luck getting help to move! That’s the worst part. ---
**Author:** ![Snooooopy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ee7513/32.png) [@Snooooopy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Snooooopy)\ **Post date:** [March 12, 2013, 3:20am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/jack-batty-home-owner/652655/4 "2013-03-12T03:20:32Z")
Finished basement? Now you can finally have that tricked-out S&M dungeon you have been dreaming of for years and years. Happy whipping! ---
**Author:** ![DummyGladHands](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/49beb7/32.png) [@DummyGladHands](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DummyGladHands)\ **Post date:** [March 12, 2013, 3:26am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/jack-batty-home-owner/652655/5 "2013-03-12T03:26:26Z")
Welcome to Home Depot, how can we help you? ---
**Author:** ![Dendarii\_Dame](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/bbce88/32.png) [@Dendarii\_Dame](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dendarii_Dame)\ **Post date:** [March 12, 2013, 3:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/jack-batty-home-owner/652655/6 "2013-03-12T15:04:51Z")
If you go ahead with this, you should remember: you will need more money than you think, more tools than you think, more time than you think, and more boxes than you think. Oh, and the Home Depot thing? It’s absolutely true. ---
**Author:** ![Enkel](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/df705f/32.png) [@Enkel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Enkel)\ **Post date:** [March 12, 2013, 3:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/jack-batty-home-owner/652655/7 "2013-03-12T15:31:54Z")
> [@Dendarii\_Dame](#): > > Oh, and the Home Depot thing? It’s absolutely true. They should have support groups. I’d been off Home Depot for a while… then last week I needed a $35 kit that only Home Depot sold. Darn if I’m not already back into the habit for over $200 and I went for the hard stuff… I browsed the cull wood cart. DAMN THAT CULL WOOD CART… I’m now building a fancy dog house for my dog (but, hey, the materials were a whopping total of $9 and it will be 3/4 inch plywood over pressure treated lumber… but I forgot and now need a set of hinges… DAMN YOU HOME DEPOT!) ---
**Author:** ![Jack\_Batty](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jack_batty/32/3201_2.png) [@Jack\_Batty](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jack_Batty)\ **Post date:** [March 12, 2013, 4:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/jack-batty-home-owner/652655/8 "2013-03-12T16:03:23Z")
The one or two nice things I have going for me are A) it’s a modular that was put together 10 years ago, and its been kept pretty immaculate by the little old lady who lived there - so I’m not anticipating any sort of “fixer-upper” type shit, and 2) my brother-in-laws a builder by trade - I’ll try to get him on the hook for any actual hammer-swinging I may have to do. ---
**Author:** ![Oakminster](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/77aa72/32.png) [@Oakminster](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Oakminster)\ **Post date:** [March 12, 2013, 4:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/jack-batty-home-owner/652655/9 "2013-03-12T16:59:09Z")
Pro tip: buy an extra package of toilet paper, and throw it in the trunk of your car. That way, you won’t be caught short on moving day or the day after. ---
**Author:** ![Northern\_Piper](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/northern_piper/32/5304_2.png) [@Northern\_Piper](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Northern_Piper)\ **Post date:** [March 12, 2013, 5:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/jack-batty-home-owner/652655/10 "2013-03-12T17:05:36Z")
> [@Jack\_Batty](#): > > What the fuck have I gotten myself into now? You now have a place to hang your cape, of course! Congrats! ---
**Author:** ![Scubaqueen](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/c0e974/32.png) [@Scubaqueen](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Scubaqueen)\ **Post date:** [March 12, 2013, 6:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/jack-batty-home-owner/652655/11 "2013-03-12T18:04:55Z")
As a co-worker once told me with a smirk the day I bought Casa de Scubaqueen, ‘Welcome to the lifetime debtors’ club.’ ---
**Author:** ![August\_West](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/august_west/32/18069_2.png) [@August\_West](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/August_West)\ **Post date:** [March 12, 2013, 6:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/jack-batty-home-owner/652655/12 "2013-03-12T18:30:26Z")
Finally, you’re a decent, upstanding, pillar of your community! Congratulations! ---
**Author:** ![Jack\_Batty](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jack_batty/32/3201_2.png) [@Jack\_Batty](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jack_Batty)\ **Post date:** [March 12, 2013, 6:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/jack-batty-home-owner/652655/13 "2013-03-12T18:36:17Z")
Let’s not go overboard, here. ---
**Author:** ![campp](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/c5a1d2/32.png) [@campp](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/campp)\ **Post date:** [March 12, 2013, 7:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/jack-batty-home-owner/652655/14 "2013-03-12T19:23:22Z")
Now you can yell with authority: “Get off of my lawn!” ---
**Author:** ![phall0106](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/phall0106/32/5934_2.png) [@phall0106](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/phall0106)\ **Post date:** [March 13, 2013, 12:12am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/jack-batty-home-owner/652655/15 "2013-03-13T00:12:19Z")
Buy stock in Home Depot and Lowe’s right now. It’s an investment that will pay off regardless of how well kept up the house is that you’re buying. You’ll soon discover that one room needs a ceiling fan, that the bedroom/livingroom could use a new coat of paint, the front yard could use a couple of flower beds, yadda, yadda, yadda. I love my house, but boy is it a money suck. ---
**Author:** ![papergirl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/aca169/32.png) [@papergirl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/papergirl)\ **Post date:** [March 13, 2013, 1:38am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/jack-batty-home-owner/652655/16 "2013-03-13T01:38:45Z")
Four and a half years ago, I bought a little 1000 sf, 3 bedroom house for myself, the two youngest children, and our assorted cats and dogs. It was perhaps the single hugest thing I’ve ever done for us. Honestly, every day, no matter how bad things are, I pull into the drive and think how lucky I am, and how glad to have My Own House. It can be costly and a lot of work, but it’s all ours. 🙂 Congratulations!!! ---
**Author:** ![Cerowyn](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/82dd89/32.png) [@Cerowyn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cerowyn)\ **Post date:** [March 14, 2013, 3:18am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/jack-batty-home-owner/652655/17 "2013-03-14T03:18:19Z")
Go, you! ---
**Author:** ![aceplace57](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/aceplace57/32/3500_2.png) [@aceplace57](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/aceplace57)\ **Post date:** [March 14, 2013, 3:31am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/jack-batty-home-owner/652655/18 "2013-03-14T03:31:50Z")
Congratulations Jack. btw, you’ll need a riding mower to keep that 1/2 acre under control. 😉 I get a lot of satisfaction owning a home and keeping things nice. Nothing fancy but its mine. ---
**Author:** ![Jack\_Batty](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jack_batty/32/3201_2.png) [@Jack\_Batty](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jack_Batty)\ **Post date:** [March 14, 2013, 12:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/jack-batty-home-owner/652655/19 "2013-03-14T12:14:37Z")
I’ve been pre-approved, so it’s all but a done deal, but going through the official mortgage application process is giving panic attacks. I’m not sure if I have all the documentation I’m going to need – and I don’t know if that’s a deal-breaker. Gah. This is killing me. Life was so much easier when I was a dirt-bag. ---
**Author:** ![CrankyAsAnOldMan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/crankyasanoldman/32/11670_2.png) [@CrankyAsAnOldMan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CrankyAsAnOldMan)\ **Post date:** [March 14, 2013, 1:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/jack-batty-home-owner/652655/20 "2013-03-14T13:01:37Z")
Take heart, you can still be a dirtbag! 😉 [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/jack-batty-home-owner/652655.md?page=2)