# Jack Bauer vs. Walker, Texas Ranger **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [July 7, 2007, 7:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/jack-bauer-vs-walker-texas-ranger/410890 "2007-07-07T19:20:04Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 8\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![dotchan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/9d8465/32.png) [@dotchan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dotchan)\ **Post date:** [July 7, 2007, 7:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/jack-bauer-vs-walker-texas-ranger/410890/1 "2007-07-07T19:20:04Z")
Well? šŸ˜ƒ ---
**Author:** ![asterion](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/4da419/32.png) [@asterion](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/asterion)\ **Post date:** [July 7, 2007, 7:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/jack-bauer-vs-walker-texas-ranger/410890/2 "2007-07-07T19:40:31Z")
Until Conan has a Jack Bauer lever to go with his Walker, Texas Ranger lever, Iā€™m gonna have to go with Walker. Because, thanks to that lever, I have actually managed to see more of Walker, Texas Ranger than I have 24 (though weā€™re talking about like 2 minutes total against none at all.) ---
**Author:** ![Least\_Original\_User\_Name\_Ever](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/e480ec/32.png) [@Least\_Original\_User\_Name\_Ever](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Least_Original_User_Name_Ever)\ **Post date:** [July 7, 2007, 7:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/jack-bauer-vs-walker-texas-ranger/410890/3 "2007-07-07T19:44:15Z")
Walker, Texas Ranger. Itā€™s not even close. ---
**Author:** ![Hey\_It\_s\_That\_Guy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/6f9a4e/32.png) [@Hey\_It\_s\_That\_Guy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hey_It_s_That_Guy)\ **Post date:** [July 7, 2007, 8:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/jack-bauer-vs-walker-texas-ranger/410890/4 "2007-07-07T20:13:35Z")
Are you kidding? Bauer would wipe the floor with Walker, Bourne, and Bond all at once. The only fictional action heroes Bauer might have trouble with are Batman and John McClane. ---
**Author:** ![Aioua](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/87869e/32.png) [@Aioua](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Aioua)\ **Post date:** [July 7, 2007, 8:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/jack-bauer-vs-walker-texas-ranger/410890/5 "2007-07-07T20:19:42Z")
Yeah, Norris might have some real life skills, but Bauer is just a god. I donā€™t know if any of you saw the opening episode of last season butā€¦ he kills an armed guard, while he (bauer) is tied to a chair, by _biting his jugular out_ Walker canā€™t touch that. ---
**Author:** ![Oslo\_Ostragoth](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/a9a28c/32.png) [@Oslo\_Ostragoth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Oslo_Ostragoth)\ **Post date:** [July 8, 2007, 12:39am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/jack-bauer-vs-walker-texas-ranger/410890/6 "2007-07-08T00:39:26Z")
Jack Bauer has the _ **Jack Bauer Slide of Death** _ ā„¢. Does Walker have anything close to that? ---
**Author:** ![elelle](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/f0a364/32.png) [@elelle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/elelle)\ **Post date:** [July 8, 2007, 1:29am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/jack-bauer-vs-walker-texas-ranger/410890/7 "2007-07-08T01:29:36Z")
Jack Bauer has much better lighting. ---
**Author:** ![Oslo\_Ostragoth](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/a9a28c/32.png) [@Oslo\_Ostragoth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Oslo_Ostragoth)\ **Post date:** [July 8, 2007, 4:05am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/jack-bauer-vs-walker-texas-ranger/410890/8 "2007-07-08T04:05:02Z")
[QUOTE=Aioua] Yeah, Norris might have some real life skills, but Bauer is just a god. I donā€™t know if any of you saw the opening episode of last season butā€¦ he kills an armed guard, while he (bauer) is tied to a chair, by _biting his jugular out_ Walker canā€™t touch that. [/QUOTE] Donā€™t forget ā€œDayum, Jack!ā€