# Jenna and Heidi: Naked Once Again **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [June 9, 2003, 8:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/jenna-and-heidi-naked-once-again/180710 "2003-06-09T20:28:24Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 13\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![Northern\_Piper](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/northern_piper/32/5304_2.png) [@Northern\_Piper](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Northern_Piper)\ **Post date:** [June 15, 2003, 2:47am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/jenna-and-heidi-naked-once-again/180710/41 "2003-06-15T02:47:40Z")
I thought it was going to be about two of the designers from “Trading Spaces”, maybe with a tasteful hay-glued-on-walls backdrop. ---
**Author:** ![Northern\_Piper](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/northern_piper/32/5304_2.png) [@Northern\_Piper](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Northern_Piper)\ **Post date:** [June 15, 2003, 2:57am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/jenna-and-heidi-naked-once-again/180710/42 "2003-06-15T02:57:05Z")
[damn submit button. keeps elbowing the preview button out of the way] But I guess that’s Hildi, not Heidi. ---
**Author:** ![quasar](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/q/48db29/32.png) [@quasar](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/quasar)\ **Post date:** [June 15, 2003, 5:15am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/jenna-and-heidi-naked-once-again/180710/43 "2003-06-15T05:15:39Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by raisinbread \* > \*\*Who _are_ these women and why are they seemingly important to popular culture at large that men want to see their naked breasts? \*\* In general terms: Well, we guys were engineered to be subjected to an inexplicable attraction to those delicately beautiful bulges graciously protruding from women’s chests. Rather unfortunately, women have decided to hide such exquisite mounds of perfection from our sight. The nerve! 😃 It is this combination of the enchanting attributes inherent in breasts, as well as the mistique derived from women’s irrational desire to shield them from view, which act as catalysts that exacerbate our natural impulses to wish being able to fix our sights on their nakedness. Hope that helped. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![japatlgt](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/df705f/32.png) [@japatlgt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/japatlgt)\ **Post date:** [June 15, 2003, 3:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/jenna-and-heidi-naked-once-again/180710/44 "2003-06-15T15:39:41Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Bandanaman \* > \*\*I’m _so_ glad I didn’t renew my subscription. \*\* Me, too. I guess the viagra really did get to Hef’s head. 😃 In any event, I’ve outgrown their editorial content. The old gray mare just ain’t what she used to be… ---
**Author:** ![raisinbread](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/8491ac/32.png) [@raisinbread](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/raisinbread)\ **Post date:** [June 15, 2003, 6:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/jenna-and-heidi-naked-once-again/180710/45 "2003-06-15T18:15:50Z")
No, that didn’t help. I understand the desire to ogle tits but I don’t understand the desire to ogle these _specific_ tits. Who are these people? For all I know they just picked someone’s neighbors and decided to make a big deal out of it. ---
**Author:** ![UrbanChic](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/u/9dc877/32.png) [@UrbanChic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/UrbanChic)\ **Post date:** [June 15, 2003, 7:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/jenna-and-heidi-naked-once-again/180710/46 "2003-06-15T19:19:10Z")
> [@](#): > > I believe Carnie Wilson is also in that issue. > [@](#): > > By the way, Carnie Wilson will be in the July edition. Nude?! ---
**Author:** ![NothingMan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/b77776/32.png) [@NothingMan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/NothingMan)\ **Post date:** [June 15, 2003, 8:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/jenna-and-heidi-naked-once-again/180710/47 "2003-06-15T20:09:43Z")
Yes **JuanitaTech** Carnie will be sans clothing, and supposedly she looks very good…from the stomach up. Thats the rumor anyways. ---
**Author:** ![Caesar\_s\_Ghost](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/73ab20/32.png) [@Caesar\_s\_Ghost](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Caesar_s_Ghost)\ **Post date:** [June 15, 2003, 8:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/jenna-and-heidi-naked-once-again/180710/48 "2003-06-15T20:56:50Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by raisinbread \* > \*\*No, that didn’t help. I understand the desire to ogle tits but I don’t understand the desire to ogle these _specific_ tits. > Who are these people? For all I know they just picked someone’s neighbors and decided to make a big deal out of it. \*\* Two girls from Survivor, one who won and another who didn’t (obviously). ---
**Author:** ![raisinbread](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/8491ac/32.png) [@raisinbread](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/raisinbread)\ **Post date:** [June 17, 2003, 2:31am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/jenna-and-heidi-naked-once-again/180710/49 "2003-06-17T02:31:09Z")
What’s “Survivor”? ---
**Author:** ![DrFidelius](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/drfidelius/32/3447_2.png) [@DrFidelius](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DrFidelius)\ **Post date:** [June 17, 2003, 2:42am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/jenna-and-heidi-naked-once-again/180710/50 "2003-06-17T02:42:19Z")
> [@](#): > > What’s “Survivor”? One of the signs of the impending apocalypse. ---
**Author:** ![Alcibiades](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/cab0a1/32.png) [@Alcibiades](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Alcibiades)\ **Post date:** [June 17, 2003, 12:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/jenna-and-heidi-naked-once-again/180710/51 "2003-06-17T12:30:02Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by DrFidelius \* > \*\*One of the signs of the impending apocalypse. \*\* Yes, exactly. Death, Pestilence, War, Famine, and Survivor. LOL ---
**Author:** ![Little\_Nemo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/little_nemo/32/3120_2.png) [@Little\_Nemo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Little_Nemo)\ **Post date:** [June 17, 2003, 4:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/jenna-and-heidi-naked-once-again/180710/52 "2003-06-17T16:49:01Z")
> [@](#): > > What’s “Survivor”? I don’t know what the cable situation is in The Purplest Place, but here in the US of A we have a TV show called “Survivor”. It’s one of the original American reality shows. In this year’s series, two of the contestants were Jenna and Heidi. Both were basically bimbos who did well due to their strategy of having large breasts and a willingness to show them. ---
**Author:** ![Little\_Nemo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/little_nemo/32/3120_2.png) [@Little\_Nemo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Little_Nemo)\ **Post date:** [June 23, 2003, 5:07am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/jenna-and-heidi-naked-once-again/180710/53 "2003-06-23T05:07:15Z")
The August issue hit the stands today and in the interest of research I contributed to the Jenna Morasco Royalty Fund (apparently Jenna cut a deal where she’s receiving a bonus based on how many issues are sold - maybe the girl’s smarter than she looks). So what have we learned? Heidi is not a natural blonde. Jenna is a natural brunette. Heidi has better boobs (kudos to the Missouri Department of Education for having a health plan which allows its teachers to afford the best in plastic surgery). Jenna’s got better nipples and ass though and a cute tattoo. The two women get surprisingly close, especially for Playboy which has traditionally been leery of lesbian overtones. Heidi remains a clueless drama queen. According to her, she was on the verge of death when she left the show. Maybe if she had told the other players that, they might not have voted her off that week. In other news, Carnie Wilson apparently is not a headliner (her nude appearance in this issue wasn’t even mentioned on the front cover). Tobey Maguire is the least convincing actor to play a superhero ever. And Miss August is a fine looking woman. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/jenna-and-heidi-naked-once-again/180710.md?page=2)