# Jerks in a Theater **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [August 19, 2006, 5:27am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/jerks-in-a-theater/369319 "2006-08-19T05:27:03Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![jhinman](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/779978/32.png) [@jhinman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jhinman)\ **Post date:** [August 19, 2006, 5:27am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/jerks-in-a-theater/369319/1 "2006-08-19T05:27:03Z")
Went to Snakes on a plane tonight. I walked out after 10 minutes off the actual film. Asked for my money back. It wasn’t the “Snakes on a Plane” that made me leave, it was the “Jerks in a theater”. A lot of shouting was going on before the movie started witch was fine but they didn’t shut up when the lights dimmed and the coming attractions started. I was expect a little heckling but I did not pay almost $11 to listen to a couple of slackers do their version of MST3K thought the entire movie. An usher ask them to be quiet and they just shouted no at them, the usher then left. It has a couple of minutes after that that my brother and I left. We were looking forward to this movie for months and understood that it might be bad (the fact that it looked like it would be so bad it was funny was why we wanted to go in the first place) but that does not give people the right to drowned out the movies because they think they are funnier. Please if you are going to do that please just wait for the DVD and do it at home and let the rest of us watch in peace. I may try and go again tomorrow. PS My first pit rant, yea I know its weak ---
**Author:** ![Mayo\_Speaks](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/c57346/32.png) [@Mayo\_Speaks](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mayo_Speaks)\ **Post date:** [August 19, 2006, 5:37am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/jerks-in-a-theater/369319/2 "2006-08-19T05:37:21Z")
I am sick and tired of the muthafuckin’ jerks in this muthafuckin’ theater! ---
**Author:** ![Cervaise](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cervaise/32/16693_2.png) [@Cervaise](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cervaise)\ **Post date:** [August 19, 2006, 8:36am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/jerks-in-a-theater/369319/3 "2006-08-19T08:36:43Z")
As I suggested in the Cafe Society thread, this movie is practically made for audience interaction. A few years from now, it’ll be a riot at midnight screenings. The downside is, everybody knows this, so they’re starting before they have any actual material. It’ll take some time for the bozos to get over themselves and their shouting of painfully obvious idiocies (“you tell 'em, Sam!”), but eventually the cream will rise to the top. Don’t go tomorrow. Wait a couple of years for the buzz to build around the midnighters. Then go. ---
**Author:** ![Rigamarole](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/77aa72/32.png) [@Rigamarole](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rigamarole)\ **Post date:** [August 19, 2006, 8:43am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/jerks-in-a-theater/369319/4 "2006-08-19T08:43:12Z")
[QUOTE=Cervaise] As I suggested in the Cafe Society thread, this movie is practically made for audience interaction. [/QUOTE] There’s a thought. They should make Choose-Your-Own-Adventure style movies… ---
**Author:** ![ParentalAdvisory](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/53a042/32.png) [@ParentalAdvisory](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ParentalAdvisory)\ **Post date:** [August 19, 2006, 11:18am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/jerks-in-a-theater/369319/5 "2006-08-19T11:18:51Z")
[QUOTE=Cervaise] As I suggested in the Cafe Society thread, this movie is practically made for audience interaction. [/QUOTE] I’m not sure if this is something you truly believe and participate yourself in, but if any audience member was being loud and used this as an excuse, they’re getting slugged. ---
**Author:** ![Contrapuntal](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/e274bd/32.png) [@Contrapuntal](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Contrapuntal)\ **Post date:** [August 19, 2006, 11:37am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/jerks-in-a-theater/369319/6 "2006-08-19T11:37:22Z")
I don’t watch movies in theaters anymore. I consider it to be a great personal loss. It was escapist fantasy for me. I would immerse myself in the total visual/aural/artistic experience. Rude motherfuckers, whose mamas were undoubtedly scrounging about in local alleyways for the discarded chewing gum they use to stop the bleeding from suppurating sores both vile and various, rather than instructing said motherfuckers in the basic social niceties required to just, you know, get along, have ruined it for me. The dumbasses cannot be shamed, and as the OP has pointed out, the theatre management is often unsuited to the task of growing a pair and kicking out the assholes who spoil it for everyone else. I truly see a self-fulfilling downward spiral–as movie audiences get dumber and dumberer, movies will follow happily along, performing a sort of reverse clang-clang. That sound you hear is the sinkhole sucking down the Sahara of the Bozarts, c. early twenty-first century. ---
**Author:** ![Bryan\_Ekers](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bryan_ekers/32/183_2.png) [@Bryan\_Ekers](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bryan_Ekers)\ **Post date:** [August 19, 2006, 11:58am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/jerks-in-a-theater/369319/7 "2006-08-19T11:58:55Z")
Man, I _was_ looking forward to seeing this, but I absolutely hate theatre jerks. I’ll wait a few weeks and catch a lightly-attended afternoon show, if possible. ---
**Author:** ![artificial](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/898d66/32.png) [@artificial](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/artificial)\ **Post date:** [August 19, 2006, 1:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/jerks-in-a-theater/369319/8 "2006-08-19T13:55:15Z")
Someone brought a baby to the screening I went to last night. A crying, screaming INFANT to an R rated movie. I hope baby’s first word is something interesting. ---
**Author:** ![Caffeine\_Cat](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/48db29/32.png) [@Caffeine\_Cat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Caffeine_Cat)\ **Post date:** [August 19, 2006, 2:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/jerks-in-a-theater/369319/9 "2006-08-19T14:35:10Z")
[QUOTE=artificial] Someone brought a baby to the screening I went to last night. A crying, screaming INFANT to an R rated movie. I hope baby’s first word is something interesting. [/QUOTE] “Honey, come here quickly!. Lucy is going to say her first word!” “Mmmmm… Mmmmmaa… Mmmotherfucker” 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Larry\_Mudd](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/f14d63/32.png) [@Larry\_Mudd](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Larry_Mudd)\ **Post date:** [August 19, 2006, 3:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/jerks-in-a-theater/369319/10 "2006-08-19T15:33:35Z")
[QUOTE=Caffeine Cat] “Honey, come here quickly!. Lucy is going to say her first word!” “Mmmmm… Mmmmmaa… Mmmotherfucker” 😃 [/QUOTE] My thesaurus does list “da-da” as a synonym, so that’s not so implausible. ---
**Author:** ![jhinman](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/779978/32.png) [@jhinman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jhinman)\ **Post date:** [August 19, 2006, 3:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/jerks-in-a-theater/369319/11 "2006-08-19T15:35:19Z")
[QUOTE=Cervaise] As I suggested in the Cafe Society thread, this movie is practically made for audience interaction. [/QUOTE] This was not Rocky Horror Pictureshow audience interaction. No else in the audience was laughing and any audience interaction that might actually have made the movie more enjoyabe stop so as not to encourge the 2 or 3 jerks. You are right in 2 or 3 years a midnight showing of this movie will be great with the right people provide you can keep the jerks out. ---
**Author:** ![Guinastasia](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/guinastasia/32/5751_2.png) [@Guinastasia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Guinastasia)\ **Post date:** [August 19, 2006, 4:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/jerks-in-a-theater/369319/12 "2006-08-19T16:23:21Z")
So basically you’ve had it with these motherfucking jerks in the motherfucking theater? 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Contrapuntal](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/e274bd/32.png) [@Contrapuntal](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Contrapuntal)\ **Post date:** [August 19, 2006, 4:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/jerks-in-a-theater/369319/13 "2006-08-19T16:30:13Z")
[QUOTE=Guinastasia] So basically you’ve had it with these motherfucking jerks in the motherfucking theater? 😃 [/QUOTE] Yup. Him and [**Mayo**](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showpost.php?p=7695134&postcount=2) both. ---
**Author:** ![Mayo\_Speaks](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/c57346/32.png) [@Mayo\_Speaks](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mayo_Speaks)\ **Post date:** [August 19, 2006, 4:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/jerks-in-a-theater/369319/14 "2006-08-19T16:34:46Z")
[QUOTE=Guinastasia] So basically you’ve had it with these motherfucking jerks in the motherfucking theater? 😃 [/QUOTE] See post #2, muthafucka’! 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Guinastasia](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/guinastasia/32/5751_2.png) [@Guinastasia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Guinastasia)\ **Post date:** [August 19, 2006, 4:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/jerks-in-a-theater/369319/15 "2006-08-19T16:36:22Z")
D’oh! I saw that right after I posted. :smack: Oh well, snakes on a plane, I guess. ---
**Author:** ![Contrapuntal](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/e274bd/32.png) [@Contrapuntal](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Contrapuntal)\ **Post date:** [August 19, 2006, 4:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/jerks-in-a-theater/369319/16 "2006-08-19T16:37:14Z")
[QUOTE=Mayo Speaks!] See post #2, muthafucka’! 😃 [/QUOTE] Stop bitin’ my style, snakebreath. ---
**Author:** ![Carlyjay](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/e0b2c6/32.png) [@Carlyjay](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Carlyjay)\ **Post date:** [August 19, 2006, 4:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/jerks-in-a-theater/369319/17 "2006-08-19T16:55:30Z")
Gee, I went to see it last night with another Doper, and the whole theatre was cheering and yelling, and it was far and above the most wonderful movie I’ve ever experienced. It’s not a great movie. Trust me. But the audience interaction was _fabulous_. I had more fun than I can remember ever having in a movie before. And I’m generally the kind of person who _hates hates hates_ “audience interaction” movies and Jerks in a Theatre. The moment Samuel L. Jackson’s name came onscreen, the entire theatre cheered. When he said “The Line”, people were up on their feet, giving him a standing ovation. It was _fabulous_. I sort of expected audiences to be insane for this movie, though, so maybe it helps that I was very prepared for it. ---
**Author:** ![saoirse](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/5daacb/32.png) [@saoirse](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/saoirse)\ **Post date:** [August 19, 2006, 5:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/jerks-in-a-theater/369319/18 "2006-08-19T17:08:41Z")
[QUOTE=Caffeine Cat] “Honey, come here quickly!. Lucy is going to say her first word!” “Mmmmm… Mmmmmaa… Mmmotherfucker” 😃 [/QUOTE] Two teeny tiny hijacks: 1. I remember a couple bringing their infant daughter (I believ, becuase she was all in pink) to _Silence of the Lambs_. 2. My ex-wufe’s baby sister’s first word was motherfucker. She was listening to her sisters playing cards at the time. ---
**Author:** ![nameless](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/779978/32.png) [@nameless](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/nameless)\ **Post date:** [August 19, 2006, 5:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/jerks-in-a-theater/369319/19 "2006-08-19T17:09:49Z")
Someone in my showing yelled “LOOK OUT! There’s a snake in his PANTS!” when Samuel L. Jackson was asking out Julianne Margulis. Penis ensued. I mean laughter. Laughter ensued. ---
**Author:** ![Carlyjay](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/e0b2c6/32.png) [@Carlyjay](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Carlyjay)\ **Post date:** [August 19, 2006, 5:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/jerks-in-a-theater/369319/20 "2006-08-19T17:21:00Z")
[QUOTE=nameless] Someone in my showing yelled “LOOK OUT! There’s a snake in his PANTS!” when Samuel L. Jackson was asking out Julianne Margulis. Penis ensued. I mean laughter. Laughter ensued. [/QUOTE] I believe someone shouted that in my theatre, too. Hmmm. You weren’t in Oakville, Ontario, were you? And I may --MAY-- have been guilty of, around that time, calling out: “Snakes on a Date!” [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/jerks-in-a-theater/369319.md?page=2)