# Jessica Simpson gets dumber still! **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [March 16, 2004, 5:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/jessica-simpson-gets-dumber-still/234667 "2004-03-16T17:15:34Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Really\_Not\_All\_That\_Bright](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/e8c25b/32.png) [@Really\_Not\_All\_That\_Bright](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Really_Not_All_That_Bright)\ **Post date:** [March 16, 2004, 5:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/jessica-simpson-gets-dumber-still/234667/1 "2004-03-16T17:15:34Z")
I heard on the Tony Bruno show this morning (via the _Washington Post_, I think) that Jessica Simpson visited the White House this week. Her words upon being introduced to Interior Secretary Gail Norton: “You’ve done a wonderful job decorating the White House,”… I don’t know if it was a whoosh or not, but I think it’s credible… Googling turned up nowt. ---
**Author:** ![Jervoise](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/d2c977/32.png) [@Jervoise](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jervoise)\ **Post date:** [March 17, 2004, 5:23am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/jessica-simpson-gets-dumber-still/234667/2 "2004-03-17T05:23:25Z")
I once had a theory that Jessica Simpson is really smart as a whip and her idiotic utterances are merely the work of a superior mind poking fun at a world which denies the possibility that a pretty young woman can have big tits, blonde hair and a career warbling teen pop and still be intelligent and successful. I suspected her vacuous expression and inane braying was too convincing a portrayal of stupidity to be anything but a brilliant play on our own prejudices and belief in stereotypes. In my fevered imaginings, not only was Ms Simpson a modern-day savant of the entertainment world, but a convincing actress in all her chameleon appearances. … but then I watched “Newlyweds” and heard her utter plaintively, “_what’s rigor mortis_?” ---
**Author:** ![Michael\_Ellis](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/977dab/32.png) [@Michael\_Ellis](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Michael_Ellis)\ **Post date:** [March 17, 2004, 7:48am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/jessica-simpson-gets-dumber-still/234667/3 "2004-03-17T07:48:48Z")
Eh, I’d still do her. ---
**Author:** ![Really\_Not\_All\_That\_Bright](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/e8c25b/32.png) [@Really\_Not\_All\_That\_Bright](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Really_Not_All_That_Bright)\ **Post date:** [March 17, 2004, 8:08am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/jessica-simpson-gets-dumber-still/234667/4 "2004-03-17T08:08:26Z")
> [@Michael Ellis](#): > > Eh, I’d still do her. We’d all _do_ her; we’d get to tell our friends we did Jessica Simpson and become Official Alpha Male ™ of our circle for the rest of our lives. The question is, would you kick her out of bed for eating crackers? ---
**Author:** ![Michael\_Ellis](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/977dab/32.png) [@Michael\_Ellis](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Michael_Ellis)\ **Post date:** [March 17, 2004, 8:10am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/jessica-simpson-gets-dumber-still/234667/5 "2004-03-17T08:10:05Z")
> [@Really Not All That Bright](#): > > The question is, would you kick her out of bed for eating crackers? Ah, I see. I that case, the question becomes “What kind of crackers?” 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Really\_Not\_All\_That\_Bright](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/e8c25b/32.png) [@Really\_Not\_All\_That\_Bright](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Really_Not_All_That_Bright)\ **Post date:** [March 17, 2004, 9:02am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/jessica-simpson-gets-dumber-still/234667/6 "2004-03-17T09:02:19Z")
**Ritz**. Is there _really_ any other kind? ---
**Author:** ![Michael\_Ellis](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/977dab/32.png) [@Michael\_Ellis](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Michael_Ellis)\ **Post date:** [March 17, 2004, 9:06am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/jessica-simpson-gets-dumber-still/234667/7 "2004-03-17T09:06:45Z")
> [@Really Not All That Bright](#): > > **Ritz**. Is there _really_ any other kind? Hmm, Jessica Simpson in bed covered in Ritz Crackers. 😃 So much for my last minute studying. ---
**Author:** ![Tusculan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/ecd19e/32.png) [@Tusculan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tusculan)\ **Post date:** [March 17, 2004, 10:56am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/jessica-simpson-gets-dumber-still/234667/8 "2004-03-17T10:56:15Z")
**Jervoise** , I had the exact same thought (even though you put it much better than I can). However, I’ve never heard or seen her on television so I’m still under the illusion that she really is smart underneath. Anyway, who cares if she looks this good. 😉 ---
**Author:** ![Martiju](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/e8c25b/32.png) [@Martiju](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Martiju)\ **Post date:** [March 17, 2004, 1:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/jessica-simpson-gets-dumber-still/234667/9 "2004-03-17T13:44:28Z")
> [@Michael Ellis](#): > > Ah, I see. I that case, the question becomes “What kind of crackers?” 😃 Or: who’s Crackers? ---
**Author:** ![KidCharlemagne](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/ed8c4c/32.png) [@KidCharlemagne](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/KidCharlemagne)\ **Post date:** [March 17, 2004, 2:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/jessica-simpson-gets-dumber-still/234667/10 "2004-03-17T14:13:15Z")
She may be getting dumber but she was **Really Not All That Bright** to begin with. :eek: ---
**Author:** ![grayhairedmomma](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/47e85d/32.png) [@grayhairedmomma](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/grayhairedmomma)\ **Post date:** [March 17, 2004, 4:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/jessica-simpson-gets-dumber-still/234667/11 "2004-03-17T16:44:29Z")
Just to defend her somewhat, at least she isn’t afraid to ask questions if she doesn’t know or understand something. And she actually seems to listen to and absorb the answers. Quoting her husband, “She’s really pretty smart, she just doesn’t think before speaking.” I think she’s ignorant of a lot of things, which from listening to the way she was brought up she seemed pretty sheltered, but I don’t think she’s dumb. Dumb is an adjective I think is for people who don’t/won’t learn anything. ---
**Author:** ![Breezy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/b3f665/32.png) [@Breezy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Breezy)\ **Post date:** [March 17, 2004, 5:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/jessica-simpson-gets-dumber-still/234667/12 "2004-03-17T17:09:48Z")
> [@mornea](#): > > Just to defend her somewhat, at least she isn’t afraid to ask questions if she doesn’t know or understand something. > > And she actually seems to listen to and absorb the answers. Quoting her husband, “She’s really pretty smart, she just doesn’t think before speaking.” > > I think she’s ignorant of a lot of things, which from listening to the way she was brought up she seemed pretty sheltered, but I don’t think she’s dumb. Dumb is an adjective I think is for people who don’t/won’t learn anything. I totally agree. I don’t think she’s DUMB at all. She’s just one of those people who says things before thinking them through. Doesn’t EVERYBODY say dumb stuff? If a film crew filmed anybody for 5 months, they would certainly be able to make the person look “dumb.” ---
**Author:** ![heater](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/858c86/32.png) [@heater](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/heater)\ **Post date:** [March 17, 2004, 5:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/jessica-simpson-gets-dumber-still/234667/13 "2004-03-17T17:16:57Z")
> [@Really Not All That Bright](#): > > The question is, would you kick her out of bed for eating crackers? Only if she said she was better on the floor. ---
**Author:** ![Indygrrl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/58f4c7/32.png) [@Indygrrl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Indygrrl)\ **Post date:** [March 17, 2004, 5:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/jessica-simpson-gets-dumber-still/234667/14 "2004-03-17T17:17:54Z")
> [@Breezy](#): > > I totally agree. I don’t think she’s DUMB at all. She’s just one of those people who says things before thinking them through. > > Doesn’t EVERYBODY say dumb stuff? If a film crew filmed anybody for 5 months, they would certainly be able to make the person look “dumb.” Everyone says things that are embarassing, but I think you could film me for 5 months and you wouldn’t hear me say anything as stupid as the stuff that comes out of that girl. She’s an idiot. ---
**Author:** ![mnemosyne](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/c4cdca/32.png) [@mnemosyne](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/mnemosyne)\ **Post date:** [March 17, 2004, 7:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/jessica-simpson-gets-dumber-still/234667/15 "2004-03-17T19:56:55Z")
I have a cousin who is very much like Jessica Simpson (except for the rich and famous singing part, and the married part). My cousin, C, is tall, blonde, well dressed, popular, intelligent…yet half the time when she speaks, it takes an interpreter to figure out what she meant. C is a student, getting straight A’s and going into early childhood education (watch out!). I don’t doubt for a moment that she is an incredibly smart person, but she has always had a tendancy to speak before thinking.She is fluent in english and french, and as such has no problems tossing in the word for something from the other language (even conjugating it) if that word comes to her first. If she can’t remember the word for something, she has a habit of saying something sort of similar, but usually completely invented. She has been doing this since she learned to talk. She also is a bit naive, simply because her interests don’t lie in reading news, or reading/watching trivia games or things like these boards. But she is not stupid, nor dumb, nor an idiot or anything else said in this thread. 5 months of filming C would give content much like the _Newlyweds_, but it has nothing to do with her interlligence. She just doesn’t care to spend 45 minutes formulating a sentence. Geez, I sound like these were personal attacks on my cousin! All I’m saying is that sometimes, there IS more than the editors will let you see! I tend to believe this is true about Jessica Simpson too. Besides, it makes great entertainment! 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Queen\_Bee\_1](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/q/e480ec/32.png) [@Queen\_Bee\_1](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Queen_Bee_1)\ **Post date:** [March 17, 2004, 8:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/jessica-simpson-gets-dumber-still/234667/16 "2004-03-17T20:02:48Z")
> [@Michael Ellis](#): > > Hmm, Jessica Simpson in bed covered in Ritz Crackers. 😃 > > So much for my last minute studying. Do you mean the bed covered in Ritz, or Jessica covered in Ritz? 'Cause if you mean Jessica, you’d probably have to cover her with mayonnaise first to make them stick. ---
**Author:** ![Mal\_Adroit](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/df788c/32.png) [@Mal\_Adroit](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mal_Adroit)\ **Post date:** [March 17, 2004, 8:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/jessica-simpson-gets-dumber-still/234667/17 "2004-03-17T20:10:06Z")
> [@Really Not All That Bright](#): > > Her words upon being introduced to Interior Secretary Gail Norton: “You’ve done a wonderful job decorating the White House.” Sounds highly made up. ---
**Author:** ![Tangent](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tangent/32/3098_2.png) [@Tangent](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tangent)\ **Post date:** [March 17, 2004, 8:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/jessica-simpson-gets-dumber-still/234667/18 "2004-03-17T20:22:36Z")
> [@Queen Bee](#): > > Do you mean the bed covered in Ritz, or Jessica covered in Ritz? 'Cause if you mean Jessica, you’d probably have to cover her with mayonnaise first to make them stick. I’d use some of that cheese that you squirt out of a can. ---
**Author:** ![lisacurl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/41988e/32.png) [@lisacurl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lisacurl)\ **Post date:** [March 17, 2004, 9:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/jessica-simpson-gets-dumber-still/234667/19 "2004-03-17T21:41:51Z")
> [@Really Not All That Bright](#): > > I heard on the Tony Bruno show this morning (via the _Washington Post_, I think) that Jessica Simpson visited the White House this week. > > Her words upon being introduced to Interior Secretary Gail Norton: “You’ve done a wonderful job decorating the White House,”… I don’t know if it was a whoosh or not, but I think it’s credible… Googling turned up nowt. [Lloyd Grove is reporting it in the Washington Post](http://www.nydailynews.com/news/gossip/story/174264p-151803c.html)… you’ll have to scroll down a bit. > [@](#): > > Who could write this stuff? Gotta love that Jessica Simpson. According to The Washington Post, the ditzy star of MTV’s hit reality show “Newlyweds” found herself face to face with Cabinet official Gale Norton during a White House tour on Sunday. When Simpson was introduced to President Bush’s Secretary of the Interior, she eagerly told Norton: “You’ve done a nice job decorating the White House.” ---
**Author:** ![TeaElle](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/8491ac/32.png) [@TeaElle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TeaElle)\ **Post date:** [March 17, 2004, 10:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/jessica-simpson-gets-dumber-still/234667/20 "2004-03-17T22:03:03Z")
> [@Indygrrl](#): > > She’s an idiot. She’s uneducated. She was working, building a career, at an age when most kids are learning things – not just school subjects, but life subjects, like what Chicken of the Sea is and how to clean a kitchen. She never had anything like a normal life, and normal experiences, and it shows in the sorts of things that she knows and is able to do and able to suss out for herself. She asks the kinds of questions an 11 year old would ask because she never had a chance to be 11. And now her father – who orchestrated his daughter’s immature entry into the world of entertainment – is reigning over this festival of exploitation of his daughter’s faults and foibles. I’m left with a belief that the man really doesn’t like his kid very much, because everything he’s involved in ultimately seems to be to her overall detriment. [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/jessica-simpson-gets-dumber-still/234667.md?page=2)