# Jesus Christ Fuck! BP oil spill collection ship catches fire **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [June 15, 2010, 7:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/jesus-christ-fuck-bp-oil-spill-collection-ship-catches-fire/543340 "2010-06-15T19:28:57Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Boyo\_Jim](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/87869e/32.png) [@Boyo\_Jim](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Boyo_Jim)\ **Post date:** [June 15, 2010, 7:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/jesus-christ-fuck-bp-oil-spill-collection-ship-catches-fire/543340/1 "2010-06-15T19:28:57Z")
WHAT THE FUCK? [Story here.](http://www.businessweek.com/news/2010-06-15/bp-suspends-oil-spill-recovery-after-ship-fire-update1-.html) So they “temporarily” stopped collecting oil, which presumably means it’s all spewing into the Gulf again. Yeah, “lightning”. Where are Moe Larry and Curly when we need them? ---
**Author:** ![John\_Mace](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/john_mace/32/185_2.png) [@John\_Mace](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/John_Mace)\ **Post date:** [June 15, 2010, 7:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/jesus-christ-fuck-bp-oil-spill-collection-ship-catches-fire/543340/2 "2010-06-15T19:48:49Z")
I don’t see why “lightning” is hard to believe. That part of the country regularly gets thunderstorms, and my understanding is that the weather has been pretty unsettled there lately. Looks like just a temporary glitch though. Still, BP doesn’t need this kind of press, and Obama doesn’t either. ---
**Author:** ![Shot\_From\_Guns](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ccd318/32.png) [@Shot\_From\_Guns](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shot_From_Guns)\ **Post date:** [June 15, 2010, 7:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/jesus-christ-fuck-bp-oil-spill-collection-ship-catches-fire/543340/3 "2010-06-15T19:57:18Z")
Does it make me a terrible person that I laughed? ---
**Author:** ![akennett](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ee59a6/32.png) [@akennett](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/akennett)\ **Post date:** [June 15, 2010, 7:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/jesus-christ-fuck-bp-oil-spill-collection-ship-catches-fire/543340/4 "2010-06-15T19:58:54Z")
> [@John\_Mace](#): > > I don’t see why “lightning” is hard to believe. Yeah, me either. Hell, lightning in Ohio set [Jesus on fire](http://religion.blogs.cnn.com/2010/06/15/jesus-statue-struck-by-lightning/?hpt=C2). ---
**Author:** ![Hal\_Briston](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/a9a28c/32.png) [@Hal\_Briston](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hal_Briston)\ **Post date:** [June 15, 2010, 8:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/jesus-christ-fuck-bp-oil-spill-collection-ship-catches-fire/543340/5 "2010-06-15T20:01:28Z")
> [@akennett](#): > > Yeah, me either. Hell, lightening in Ohio set [Jesus on fire](http://religion.blogs.cnn.com/2010/06/15/jesus-statue-struck-by-lightning/?hpt=C2). Between TD Jesus and this ship, how long until the first blogger blames that Muslim Obama for the lightning? ---
**Author:** ![armedmonkey](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/d6d6ee/32.png) [@armedmonkey](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/armedmonkey)\ **Post date:** [June 15, 2010, 8:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/jesus-christ-fuck-bp-oil-spill-collection-ship-catches-fire/543340/6 "2010-06-15T20:03:55Z")
> [@Boyo\_Jim](#): > > Yeah, “lightning”. It was lightning. See, as the captain walked on to the bridge, he tripped over the ship’s cat. The cat claws him, he stumbles and steps on a rake. The rake’s handle snaps up and catches him in the face. The captain is knocked backwards into the shelving, which causes the bowling ball they keep on the top shelf to fall off and conk him on the head. He reaches for his coffee, but he’s disoriented, so he picks up the hurricane lamp instead. . When he tilts it , the lamp oil spills out and sets his left sleeve on fire. The first mate tries to put him out, but the bosun had filled the fire extinguisher with silly string as a practical joke. Silly string is flamable, so the fire spread. The cat’s name is “lightning”. ---
**Author:** ![Boyo\_Jim](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/87869e/32.png) [@Boyo\_Jim](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Boyo_Jim)\ **Post date:** [June 15, 2010, 8:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/jesus-christ-fuck-bp-oil-spill-collection-ship-catches-fire/543340/7 "2010-06-15T20:04:28Z")
> [@John\_Mace](#): > > I don’t see why “lightning” is hard to believe. That part of the country regularly gets thunderstorms, and my understanding is that the weather has been pretty unsettled there lately. Looks like just a temporary glitch though. > > Still, BP doesn’t need this kind of press, and Obama doesn’t either. It’s only hard to believe because BP said it. ---
**Author:** ![Boyo\_Jim](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/87869e/32.png) [@Boyo\_Jim](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Boyo_Jim)\ **Post date:** [June 15, 2010, 8:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/jesus-christ-fuck-bp-oil-spill-collection-ship-catches-fire/543340/8 "2010-06-15T20:08:26Z")
> [@A Monkey With a Gun](#): > > It was lightning. See, as the captain walked on to the bridge, he tripped over the ship’s cat. The cat claws him, he stumbles and steps on a rake. The rake’s handle snaps up and catches him in the face. The captain is knocked backwards into the shelving, which causes the bowling ball they keep on the top shelf to fall off and conk him on the head. He reaches for his coffee, but he’s disoriented, so he picks up the hurricane lamp instead. . When he tilts it , the lamp oil spills out and sets his left sleeve on fire. The first mate tries to put him out, but the bosun had filled the fire extinguisher with silly string as a practical joke. Silly string is flamable, so the fire spread. > > The cat’s name is “lightning”. You forgot about dropping the hair dryer in the bathtub, but you got the gist of it. ---
**Author:** ![Shot\_From\_Guns](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ccd318/32.png) [@Shot\_From\_Guns](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shot_From_Guns)\ **Post date:** [June 15, 2010, 8:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/jesus-christ-fuck-bp-oil-spill-collection-ship-catches-fire/543340/9 "2010-06-15T20:26:05Z")
> [@akennett](#): > > Yeah, me either. Hell, lightning in Ohio set [Jesus on fire](http://religion.blogs.cnn.com/2010/06/15/jesus-statue-struck-by-lightning/?hpt=C2). Laughing again. ---
**Author:** ![MsWhatsit](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/eb8c5e/32.png) [@MsWhatsit](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MsWhatsit)\ **Post date:** [June 15, 2010, 8:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/jesus-christ-fuck-bp-oil-spill-collection-ship-catches-fire/543340/10 "2010-06-15T20:29:13Z")
> [@Shot\_From\_Guns](#): > > Does it make me a terrible person that I laughed? If so, count me in, because I have been uncontrollably giggling since reading the thread title. OK, I stopped. No, wait, it’s on again. This is going to linger, I can tell. ---
**Author:** ![Try2B\_Comprehensive](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/try2b_comprehensive/32/65_2.png) [@Try2B\_Comprehensive](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Try2B_Comprehensive)\ **Post date:** [June 15, 2010, 8:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/jesus-christ-fuck-bp-oil-spill-collection-ship-catches-fire/543340/11 "2010-06-15T20:30:23Z")
> [@akennett](#): > > Yeah, me either. Hell, lightning in Ohio set [Jesus on fire](http://religion.blogs.cnn.com/2010/06/15/jesus-statue-struck-by-lightning/?hpt=C2). Thank God the [Giant Blue Mustang](http://diaconspiracyfiles.files.wordpress.com/2009/05/mustang-thumb-510x340.jpg) has been spared! ---
**Author:** ![tdn](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/94ad74/32.png) [@tdn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tdn)\ **Post date:** [June 15, 2010, 8:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/jesus-christ-fuck-bp-oil-spill-collection-ship-catches-fire/543340/12 "2010-06-15T20:34:26Z")
> [@A Monkey With a Gun](#): > > It was lightning. See, as the captain walked on to the bridge, he tripped over the ship’s cat. The cat claws him, he stumbles and steps on a rake. The rake’s handle snaps up and catches him in the face. The captain is knocked backwards into the shelving, which causes the bowling ball they keep on the top shelf to fall off and conk him on the head. He reaches for his coffee, but he’s disoriented, so he picks up the hurricane lamp instead. . When he tilts it , the lamp oil spills out and sets his left sleeve on fire. The first mate tries to put him out, but the bosun had filled the fire extinguisher with silly string as a practical joke. Silly string is flamable, so the fire spread. I’m not sure why, but an image of Sideshow Bob popped into my head. ---
**Author:** ![hopesperson](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/e95f7d/32.png) [@hopesperson](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/hopesperson)\ **Post date:** [June 15, 2010, 8:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/jesus-christ-fuck-bp-oil-spill-collection-ship-catches-fire/543340/13 "2010-06-15T20:36:15Z")
> [@Boyo\_Jim](#): > > It’s only hard to believe because BP said it. Why do you hate Britain? ---
**Author:** ![Balance](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/ccd318/32.png) [@Balance](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Balance)\ **Post date:** [June 15, 2010, 8:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/jesus-christ-fuck-bp-oil-spill-collection-ship-catches-fire/543340/14 "2010-06-15T20:43:50Z")
> [@Try2B\_Comprehensive](#): > > Thank God the [Giant Blue Mustang](http://diaconspiracyfiles.files.wordpress.com/2009/05/mustang-thumb-510x340.jpg) has been spared! Isn’t that the one that killed its creator? Maybe none of the gods have quite worked up the nerve to fling a bolt at it yet. ---
**Author:** ![Polycarp](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/82dd89/32.png) [@Polycarp](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Polycarp)\ **Post date:** [June 15, 2010, 8:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/jesus-christ-fuck-bp-oil-spill-collection-ship-catches-fire/543340/15 "2010-06-15T20:48:42Z")
> [@Boyo\_Jim](#): > > WHAT THE FUCK? [Story here.](http://www.businessweek.com/news/2010-06-15/bp-suspends-oil-spill-recovery-after-ship-fire-update1-.html) So they “temporarily” stopped collecting oil, which presumably means it’s all spewing into the Gulf again. > > Yeah, “lightning”. > > Where are Moe Larry and Curly when we need them? [Funny you should ask that](http://images.ucomics.com/comics/cslbx/2010/cslbx100609.jpg). ---
**Author:** ![Shot\_From\_Guns](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ccd318/32.png) [@Shot\_From\_Guns](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shot_From_Guns)\ **Post date:** [June 15, 2010, 8:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/jesus-christ-fuck-bp-oil-spill-collection-ship-catches-fire/543340/16 "2010-06-15T20:57:42Z")
> [@MsWhatsit](#): > > If so, count me in, because I have been uncontrollably giggling since reading the thread title. I was fine until you bumped the thread again. Bwahahahahaaaaaaaaaa. > [@tdn](#): > > I’m not sure why, but an image of Sideshow Bob popped into my head. Field of rakes? ---
**Author:** ![Boyo\_Jim](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/87869e/32.png) [@Boyo\_Jim](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Boyo_Jim)\ **Post date:** [June 15, 2010, 9:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/jesus-christ-fuck-bp-oil-spill-collection-ship-catches-fire/543340/17 "2010-06-15T21:09:29Z")
> [@Shot\_From\_Guns](#): > > Does it make me a terrible person that I laughed? Swear to God (tho I’m an atheist), JESUS CHRIST FUCK was the EXACT throught that went through my heed when I saw the story about the fire. ---
**Author:** ![Boyo\_Jim](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/87869e/32.png) [@Boyo\_Jim](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Boyo_Jim)\ **Post date:** [June 15, 2010, 9:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/jesus-christ-fuck-bp-oil-spill-collection-ship-catches-fire/543340/18 "2010-06-15T21:10:59Z")
> [@Polycarp](#): > > [Funny you should ask that](http://images.ucomics.com/comics/cslbx/2010/cslbx100609.jpg). I swear I hadn’t seen this. I guess great comic minds think alike. ---
**Author:** ![Bosstone](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/22d042/32.png) [@Bosstone](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bosstone)\ **Post date:** [June 15, 2010, 9:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/jesus-christ-fuck-bp-oil-spill-collection-ship-catches-fire/543340/19 "2010-06-15T21:13:02Z")
What’s next? [The front falls off?](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8-QNAwUdHUQ) ---
**Author:** ![Grumman](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/43a26b/32.png) [@Grumman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Grumman)\ **Post date:** [June 15, 2010, 9:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/jesus-christ-fuck-bp-oil-spill-collection-ship-catches-fire/543340/20 "2010-06-15T21:32:09Z")
> [@akennett](#): > > Yeah, me either. Hell, lightning in Ohio set [Jesus on fire](http://religion.blogs.cnn.com/2010/06/15/jesus-statue-struck-by-lightning/?hpt=C2). If lightning takes out a McDonalds and a baseball field next, we’ll _really_ know God’s got it in for the U.S. [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/jesus-christ-fuck-bp-oil-spill-collection-ship-catches-fire/543340.md?page=2)