# Jesus freaks really get on my nerves **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [June 9, 2000, 6:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/jesus-freaks-really-get-on-my-nerves/21894 "2000-06-09T18:35:23Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 13\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![Duck\_Duck\_Goose](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/50afbb/32.png) [@Duck\_Duck\_Goose](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Duck_Duck_Goose)\ **Post date:** [June 13, 2000, 2:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/jesus-freaks-really-get-on-my-nerves/21894/21 "2000-06-13T14:25:41Z")
Well, gee, when someone knocks on my front door and I go to answer it, and I see that there are two people standing there, dressed to the teeth, carrying literature, and they say politely, “May we have a moment of your time?”, and I say politely, “Are you Jehovah’s Witnesses?” and usually they say politely, “Yes,” but sometimes they say politely, “No, we’re from the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints”, anyway, whichever they say, I just say politely, “Oh, we already have a church”, which is true, and I ever so politely close the door in their faces. Then they leave. I shouldn’t imagine that my blood pressure goes up more than about 5 points during the exchange. Maybe we just have polite Bible-thumpers around here. ---
**Author:** ![Nika](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/ba9def/32.png) [@Nika](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Nika)\ **Post date:** [June 13, 2000, 2:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/jesus-freaks-really-get-on-my-nerves/21894/22 "2000-06-13T14:55:34Z")
Just tell them you are a witch and will call Satan to steal their souls. I am a witch and we do not worship Satan, but usually these people think I do and it scares them away. It is actually quite funny 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![MsRobyn](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/90ced4/32.png) [@MsRobyn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MsRobyn)\ **Post date:** [June 13, 2000, 3:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/jesus-freaks-really-get-on-my-nerves/21894/23 "2000-06-13T15:01:59Z")
I have a friend who used to greet these people at the door in his undies, with a can of beer (empty) in one hand, and a cigarette in the other. They were usually so shocked, they’d politely leave. 😃 Robin ---
**Author:** ![Pizzle\_Boy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/96bed5/32.png) [@Pizzle\_Boy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Pizzle_Boy)\ **Post date:** [June 13, 2000, 3:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/jesus-freaks-really-get-on-my-nerves/21894/24 "2000-06-13T15:26:38Z")
> [@](#): > > Marge Simpson: > > A group of Jahova’s Witnesses came over and I wouldn’t let them leave. THey snuck out when I went back to the kitchen for more lemonade ---
**Author:** ![Moe](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/moe/32/2972_2.png) [@Moe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Moe)\ **Post date:** [June 13, 2000, 3:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/jesus-freaks-really-get-on-my-nerves/21894/25 "2000-06-13T15:42:43Z")
> [@](#): > > \*\* > Problem is, **Moe** , the same letter has actually been debunked in several other threads as well > > Esprix > \*\* Hey Esprix, I’m always one to want to hear the straight dope on anything and everything. Don’t suppose you have a link handy? ---
**Author:** ![Pizzle\_Boy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/96bed5/32.png) [@Pizzle\_Boy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Pizzle_Boy)\ **Post date:** [June 13, 2000, 4:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/jesus-freaks-really-get-on-my-nerves/21894/26 "2000-06-13T16:27:11Z")
> [@](#): > > Problem is, Moe, the same letter… Some of us don’t have time to read all the old threads. UncleBeer’s last count was just shy of 500,000 threads. ---
**Author:** ![Lynn\_Bodoni](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/e47c2d/32.png) [@Lynn\_Bodoni](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lynn_Bodoni)\ **Post date:** [June 13, 2000, 4:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/jesus-freaks-really-get-on-my-nerves/21894/27 "2000-06-13T16:34:31Z")
> [@](#): > > I shouldn’t imagine that my blood pressure goes up more than about 5 points during the exchange. Maybe we just have polite Bible-thumpers around here. Or perhaps you don’t find it an inconvenience. Aren’t you laid up with a bad leg or something? If these folks were ringing your doorbell at 3 AM, would you be upset? I generally sleep during the day, as does my husband (shift work). I’ve got arthritis, and I find it difficult to get up from a chair or from bed…which is why it DOES raise my blood pressure. I’m quite willing and even eager to accept packages (I do a lot of mail and computer order stuff), but I’m not anxious to have missionaries ring my doorbell. And yes, I’ve put up a sign. Doesn’t work. ---
**Author:** ![Esprix](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/esprix/32/7899_2.png) [@Esprix](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Esprix)\ **Post date:** [June 13, 2000, 5:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/jesus-freaks-really-get-on-my-nerves/21894/28 "2000-06-13T17:03:49Z")
**Moe** , here’s the link: [“Hey, ‘Dr.’ Laura _is_ a hypocrite!”](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?threadid=24874). Scroll down to near the end for **zev** ’s refutation of the entire thing. And **Pizzle** , it’s not an “old thread,” so it’s not unreasonable that since it’s even in this same forum you might have come across it. Esprix ---
**Author:** ![cornflakes](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/9d8465/32.png) [@cornflakes](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/cornflakes)\ **Post date:** [June 13, 2000, 7:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/jesus-freaks-really-get-on-my-nerves/21894/29 "2000-06-13T19:07:23Z")
RM Mentock, I doubt that I have ever been visited by Mormons. The people who have come to my door (I could guess at their religion, but that wouldn’t benefit anyone) seemed less interested in testifying and more interested in converting me. The last group, to whom I was a Buddhist, visited my next door neighbor daily for almost a week basically because she was too polite to tell them to leave. That she is a devout Eastern Orthodox did not matter. ---
**Author:** ![Moe](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/moe/32/2972_2.png) [@Moe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Moe)\ **Post date:** [June 13, 2000, 7:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/jesus-freaks-really-get-on-my-nerves/21894/30 "2000-06-13T19:56:26Z")
Wow, that was just too much to read. I read almost the whole thread including quite a few various links. From what I read though, the Dr. Laura joke letter was not debuncked, at least not to any satisfactory degree. Here’s the so called debuncking that I read, though I’m sure there was more on this that I didn’t get to: > [@](#): > > ``` > Sacrifices > > Sacrifices are not offered today because the place to offer them (the Temple in Jerusalem) no longer exists. So, the first question is > moot. You cannot sacrifice your bull to the Lord. > > Selling daughters > > A) This was usually done with marriage to the master as the ultimate objective. If the master or his son did not marry her, she would > have to be set free. This, in essence, is not much worse than an arranged marriage. > > B) More importantly, also not done today. There is a Talmudic dictum of dina d'malchusa dina which states that Jews must obey the > laws of the land. Since slavery is illegal in the U.S., Jews cannot, by Jewish law, own slaves. So this question, too, is moot. > > Women's menstruation > > This applies between a man and his wife. > > Mexican/Canadian slaves > > See item B in selling daughters, above. > > Working on Sabbath > > A) This only applies to Jews. There is no problem with Gentiles working on the Sabbath. > > B) A person could only be put to death, in Jewish law, by a duly empowered court (of which none exist today). Since there is no > Jewish death penalty in force today, this question, too, is moot. > > Shellfish > > A) Again, kosher rules only apply to Jews. > > B) We don't compare abominations. > > Altar and eyesight > > A) Only applies to Jews > > B) Only applies to kohanim (Jews of Aaronic descent). > > C) Only blindness is a problem, not bad eyesight. > > D) The point is moot since the Altar no longer exists. > > ``` Sacrifices - you mean the lord no longer expects a periodic sacrifice simply because the building no longer exists. Selling daughters - I’m not quite sure I understand this one, but I find it difficult to believe that the lord would condone anything similar to arranged marriages. Mexican/Canadian slaves - You mean to tell me (BTW by “you” I don’t mean you Exprix, but rather some arbitrary person who believes in the dubuncking power of the refutation quoted above) that this is not done anymore because the US passed a law against it. We’re talking the Bible for christ’s sake!! No man made law is supposed to be superior to the word of the ultimate royal monarch of the universe’s. Did the lord really condone slavery at one point? And the others are stupid too but I’m just getting so drained from all this crap. ---
**Author:** ![Esprix](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/esprix/32/7899_2.png) [@Esprix](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Esprix)\ **Post date:** [June 13, 2000, 8:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/jesus-freaks-really-get-on-my-nerves/21894/31 "2000-06-13T20:51:45Z")
The point was that the letter’s references were spurious at best, and **zev** just pretty much pointed it out. Of course, Schlessinger’s views are just as irrelevant, but if you’re going to ask questions from the Bible, at least ask ones that are relevant to her hipocrisy. Like I said, I still found the letter funny myself. Just MHO. Esprix ---
**Author:** ![Moe](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/moe/32/2972_2.png) [@Moe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Moe)\ **Post date:** [June 13, 2000, 9:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/jesus-freaks-really-get-on-my-nerves/21894/32 "2000-06-13T21:18:31Z")
Point taken ---
**Author:** ![Eo\_Echo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/ebca7d/32.png) [@Eo\_Echo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Eo_Echo)\ **Post date:** [June 14, 2000, 6:08am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/jesus-freaks-really-get-on-my-nerves/21894/33 "2000-06-14T06:08:50Z")
I refuse to teke issue with anybody else’s religon or their zeal in it. But I really HATE those stupid plastic Jesus fish emblems, as well as their Darwin counterparts. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/jesus-freaks-really-get-on-my-nerves/21894.md?page=1)