# Jesus-man! He's everywhere!! **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [October 22, 2007, 1:46am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/jesus-man-hes-everywhere/423529 "2007-10-22T01:46:19Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![Waverly](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/57b2e6/32.png) [@Waverly](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Waverly)\ **Post date:** [October 22, 2007, 3:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/jesus-man-hes-everywhere/423529/41 "2007-10-22T15:08:26Z")
The Jesus towel is lacking a crucial element which is present in all authentic miraculous relics: It isn’t for sale on ebay. Remember Cheesus Christ? [http://www.outletradio.com/grantham/archives/cheesuschrist.jpg](http://www.outletradio.com/grantham/archives/cheesuschrist.jpg) I’ve got a bargain for you: Miraculous Easter Bunny-shaped Buffalo Wing: [http://cgi.ebay.com/Jesus-Virgin-Mary-Image-Easter-Better-Than-Cheesus\_W0QQitemZ260172396614QQihZ016QQcategoryZ13768QQssPageNameZWDVWQQrdZ1QQcmdZViewItem](http://cgi.ebay.com/Jesus-Virgin-Mary-Image-Easter-Better-Than-Cheesus_W0QQitemZ260172396614QQihZ016QQcategoryZ13768QQssPageNameZWDVWQQrdZ1QQcmdZViewItem) ---
**Author:** ![tdn](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/94ad74/32.png) [@tdn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tdn)\ **Post date:** [October 22, 2007, 3:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/jesus-man-hes-everywhere/423529/42 "2007-10-22T15:15:31Z")
[QUOTE=Liberal] I can’t decide whether this is Jesus or South Carolina: [/QUOTE] It’s the MPAA rating of the last video I watched. ---
**Author:** ![drachillix](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/48db29/32.png) [@drachillix](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/drachillix)\ **Post date:** [October 22, 2007, 3:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/jesus-man-hes-everywhere/423529/43 "2007-10-22T15:34:28Z")
[QUOTE=lobstermobster] At least she wasn’t eaten by godless pagans. [/QUOTE] Excuse me, could I get some milk…this things a little dry. ---
**Author:** ![mobo85](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/b19c9b/32.png) [@mobo85](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/mobo85)\ **Post date:** [October 22, 2007, 3:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/jesus-man-hes-everywhere/423529/44 "2007-10-22T15:50:10Z")
[QUOTE=asterion] I love the way the OP wrote it, though. Jesus-Man, Jesus-Man, Does whatever a deity can, Takes your sins, any size, Appears on items of many kinds, Look out! Here comes the Jesus-Man! [/QUOTE] I thought it was a reference to Chicken Man, from the Dick Orkin radio shorts. ---
**Author:** ![SmokinMom](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/cc9497/32.png) [@SmokinMom](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SmokinMom)\ **Post date:** [October 22, 2007, 4:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/jesus-man-hes-everywhere/423529/45 "2007-10-22T16:16:27Z")
WTF makes all these people think that the image they see is Jesus and not…for example, Charles Manson ? Someone once emailed me a picture of the World Trade Center Jesus (the one in the smoke cloud) and I would’ve bet the farm it was Bob Marley. ---
**Author:** ![Czarcasm](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/czarcasm/32/4050_2.png) [@Czarcasm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Czarcasm)\ **Post date:** [October 22, 2007, 4:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/jesus-man-hes-everywhere/423529/46 "2007-10-22T16:26:12Z")
[QUOTE=OneCentStamp] Yeah, it is, but I think the dog is just talking out of its ass, personally. [/QUOTE] That’s just a cheap trick. I know for a fact the dog is a ventriloquist. ---
**Author:** ![tdn](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/94ad74/32.png) [@tdn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tdn)\ **Post date:** [October 22, 2007, 4:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/jesus-man-hes-everywhere/423529/47 "2007-10-22T16:29:21Z")
[QUOTE=SmokinMom] Someone once emailed me a picture of the World Trade Center Jesus (the one in the smoke cloud) and I would’ve bet the farm it was Bob Marley. [/QUOTE] Funny, at the time, it was often claimed to be Nostradamus, who of course predicted the disaster in one of his quatrains. Or not. ---
**Author:** ![Man\_With\_a\_Cat](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/cab0a1/32.png) [@Man\_With\_a\_Cat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Man_With_a_Cat)\ **Post date:** [October 22, 2007, 4:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/jesus-man-hes-everywhere/423529/48 "2007-10-22T16:30:10Z")
That’s not Jesus, it’s Bob Dylan ---
**Author:** ![Jackmannii](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jackmannii/32/311_2.png) [@Jackmannii](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jackmannii)\ **Post date:** [October 22, 2007, 4:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/jesus-man-hes-everywhere/423529/49 "2007-10-22T16:33:55Z")
My Labrador retriever Bessie is a dead ringer for Mother Teresa. Acts like her too, at least based on only chasing that stray cat up a tree and not eating it last week. Hey, with books about Labs and Mother Teresa having made the N.Y. Times bestseller list, a book by a Lab that _looks_ like Mother Teresa is a sure-fire top seller! She’ll have to dictate it to me though, her nails are too long for the computer keyboard. ---
**Author:** ![ForumBot](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/ee59a6/32.png) [@ForumBot](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ForumBot)\ **Post date:** [October 22, 2007, 4:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/jesus-man-hes-everywhere/423529/50 "2007-10-22T16:53:55Z")
[QUOTE=danceswithcats] Looks more like Wilford Brimley to me. [/QUOTE] [Sorry, I got to. This just cracks me up.](http://www.mydavey.com/imgs/jpeg/diabetis.jpg) ---
**Author:** ![lobstermobster](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lobstermobster/32/10033_2.png) [@lobstermobster](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lobstermobster)\ **Post date:** [October 22, 2007, 5:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/jesus-man-hes-everywhere/423529/51 "2007-10-22T17:06:05Z")
Nun “don’t call me Mother Theresa” Bun [http://img.viacomlocalnetworks.com/images\_sizedimage\_018155812/xl](http://img.viacomlocalnetworks.com/images_sizedimage_018155812/xl) ---
**Author:** ![Waverly](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/57b2e6/32.png) [@Waverly](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Waverly)\ **Post date:** [October 22, 2007, 5:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/jesus-man-hes-everywhere/423529/52 "2007-10-22T17:14:56Z")
[QUOTE=lobstermobster] Nun “don’t call me Mother Theresa” Bun [http://img.viacomlocalnetworks.com/images\_sizedimage\_018155812/xl](http://img.viacomlocalnetworks.com/images_sizedimage_018155812/xl) [/QUOTE] I don’t see Mother T. I only see a fetal goat in a cinnalicious uterus. ---
**Author:** ![danceswithcats](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/9e8a1a/32.png) [@danceswithcats](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/danceswithcats)\ **Post date:** [October 22, 2007, 5:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/jesus-man-hes-everywhere/423529/53 "2007-10-22T17:22:55Z")
[QUOTE=mobo85] I thought it was a reference to Chicken Man, from the Dick Orkin radio shorts. [/QUOTE] _Ding_ding_ding_ We have a winner! 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![Boggette](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/858c86/32.png) [@Boggette](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Boggette)\ **Post date:** [October 22, 2007, 6:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/jesus-man-hes-everywhere/423529/54 "2007-10-22T18:27:09Z")
We got one! Just around the corner from our house, too. People flocked to it, poured their eyes out in praise of. Hallelujah! [http://www.readingeagle.com/article.aspx?id=57716](http://www.readingeagle.com/article.aspx?id=57716) ---
**Author:** ![Kalhoun](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/3bc359/32.png) [@Kalhoun](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kalhoun)\ **Post date:** [October 22, 2007, 6:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/jesus-man-hes-everywhere/423529/55 "2007-10-22T18:32:02Z")
Less Divine Baby Jayzuz and more H.R. Puff n Stuff [http://www.flickr.com/photos/drkoontz/141575373/in/set-72057594127307298/](http://www.flickr.com/photos/drkoontz/141575373/in/set-72057594127307298/) ---
**Author:** ![eleanorigby](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/ee7513/32.png) [@eleanorigby](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/eleanorigby)\ **Post date:** [October 22, 2007, 7:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/jesus-man-hes-everywhere/423529/56 "2007-10-22T19:00:03Z")
[QUOTE=lobstermobster] Nun “don’t call me Mother Theresa” Bun [http://img.viacomlocalnetworks.com/images\_sizedimage\_018155812/xl](http://img.viacomlocalnetworks.com/images_sizedimage_018155812/xl) [/QUOTE] That’s supposed to be Mother Theresa? or the BVM? or what? I see a smooshed sticky bun. It looks stale and unappetizing, too. ---
**Author:** ![Catamount](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/catamount/32/2840_2.png) [@Catamount](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Catamount)\ **Post date:** [October 22, 2007, 7:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/jesus-man-hes-everywhere/423529/57 "2007-10-22T19:19:57Z")
Looks like a reversed [Leonardo da Vinci](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Image:Leonardo_self.jpg) to me. ---
**Author:** ![Catamount](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/catamount/32/2840_2.png) [@Catamount](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Catamount)\ **Post date:** [October 22, 2007, 7:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/jesus-man-hes-everywhere/423529/58 "2007-10-22T19:32:13Z")
[QUOTE=SpazCat] Looks like a reversed [Leonardo da Vinci](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Image:Leonardo_self.jpg) to me. [/QUOTE] Damn edit window expiration. Leonardo on the towel, I mean. The Nun Bun looks like a hermit crab. ---
**Author:** ![Waverly](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/57b2e6/32.png) [@Waverly](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Waverly)\ **Post date:** [October 22, 2007, 7:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/jesus-man-hes-everywhere/423529/59 "2007-10-22T19:47:41Z")
[QUOTE=Kalhoun] Less Divine Baby Jayzuz and more H.R. Puff n Stuff [http://www.flickr.com/photos/drkoontz/141575373/in/set-72057594127307298/](http://www.flickr.com/photos/drkoontz/141575373/in/set-72057594127307298/) [/QUOTE] I don’t know what is going on at that link, but I found it disturbing yet mesmerizing. The female Stormtrooper with bare midriff is milliseconds away from becoming bad slash-fic, but as a long time Vader I have to admit that I felt a disturbance in the force and nearly activated my lightsabre. I approve of Audrey Hepburn, Jessica Alba, and to a lesser extent Kari Byron… but the bottomless WoW elf is a bit off. Does this deranged collection belong to you? ---
**Author:** ![Kalhoun](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/3bc359/32.png) [@Kalhoun](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kalhoun)\ **Post date:** [October 22, 2007, 7:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/jesus-man-hes-everywhere/423529/60 "2007-10-22T19:56:15Z")
[QUOTE=Waverly] I don’t know what is going on at that link, but I found it disturbing yet mesmerizing. The female Stormtrooper with bare midriff is milliseconds away from becoming bad slash-fic, but as a long time Vader I have to admit that I felt a disturbance in the force and nearly activated my lightsabre. I approve of Audrey Hepburn, Jessica Alba, and to a lesser extent Kari Byron… but the bottomless WoW elf is a bit off. Does this deranged collection belong to you? [/QUOTE] Not only do I not own it, but I checked again…twice…and I still see H.R. Puff n Stuff. Whatever you’re smokin’…I want some. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/jesus-man-hes-everywhere/423529.md?page=2) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/jesus-man-hes-everywhere/423529.md?page=4)