# Jesus Rhinestone Christ with a Ruby Loincloth! **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [July 24, 2003, 1:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/jesus-rhinestone-christ-with-a-ruby-loincloth/190610 "2003-07-24T13:12:43Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Eve](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/9e8a1a/32.png) [@Eve](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Eve)\ **Post date:** [July 24, 2003, 1:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/jesus-rhinestone-christ-with-a-ruby-loincloth/190610/1 "2003-07-24T13:12:43Z")
No, I’n not cussing—this is exactly what I saw on the subway this morning. A gentleman was wearing it on a chain around his neck, and it was dangling hypnotically in front of me all the way to 33rd Street. It was about two inches long, and Jesus was made entirely of “diamonds,” and was wearing a kicky little “ruby” loincloth. He didn’t even have a cross behind him: he was just standing there, knees slightly bent and arms outstretched, as if he were belting out “Mammy” at the Palace Theater. It was Odd. ---
**Author:** ![garius](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/e19b73/32.png) [@garius](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/garius)\ **Post date:** [July 24, 2003, 1:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/jesus-rhinestone-christ-with-a-ruby-loincloth/190610/2 "2003-07-24T13:16:46Z")
Its a little known fact that towards the end of his career, Jesus had an act in Vegas. This chain is probably modelled after that. ---
**Author:** ![80sHairMetalMaven](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/8/ed655f/32.png) [@80sHairMetalMaven](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/80sHairMetalMaven)\ **Post date:** [July 24, 2003, 1:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/jesus-rhinestone-christ-with-a-ruby-loincloth/190610/3 "2003-07-24T13:17:31Z")
Eh. I see stuff like that all the time, which no longer phases me. The one that got me the most was a giant diamond and silver microphone hanging from a chain around a girl’s neck and she was so little (she was like 5 or so) that she had to bend down because of the sheer weight of it. 😃 IDBB ---
**Author:** ![UrbanChic](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/u/9dc877/32.png) [@UrbanChic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/UrbanChic)\ **Post date:** [July 24, 2003, 1:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/jesus-rhinestone-christ-with-a-ruby-loincloth/190610/4 "2003-07-24T13:20:04Z")
Bling bling Jesus? ---
**Author:** ![ThatDuckIsEvil](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/f08c70/32.png) [@ThatDuckIsEvil](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ThatDuckIsEvil)\ **Post date:** [July 24, 2003, 1:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/jesus-rhinestone-christ-with-a-ruby-loincloth/190610/5 "2003-07-24T13:20:19Z")
I dont care if it rains or freezes as long as I’ve got my Rhinestone Jesus… ---
**Author:** ![80sHairMetalMaven](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/8/ed655f/32.png) [@80sHairMetalMaven](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/80sHairMetalMaven)\ **Post date:** [July 24, 2003, 1:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/jesus-rhinestone-christ-with-a-ruby-loincloth/190610/6 "2003-07-24T13:22:15Z")
spits lemonade all over her monitor Oh gee thanks, **Duck**. :rolleyes: 😃 IDBB ---
**Author:** ![Eve](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/9e8a1a/32.png) [@Eve](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Eve)\ **Post date:** [July 24, 2003, 1:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/jesus-rhinestone-christ-with-a-ruby-loincloth/190610/7 "2003-07-24T13:23:07Z")
Of course, if he actually _had_ been made out of diamonds, he would have been damn difficult to crucify in the first place . . . ---
**Author:** ![jjimm](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/ba8739/32.png) [@jjimm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jjimm)\ **Post date:** [July 24, 2003, 1:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/jesus-rhinestone-christ-with-a-ruby-loincloth/190610/8 "2003-07-24T13:24:52Z")
I picked up a gruesome, bejewelled crucifix on a chain last time I was in Dubai. The really cool thing about it was that if you pushed down Jesus’ head, a flame shot out of his hand. A friend of mine went round the pub wearing it, saying “have you seen the light of Jesus?” then lighting their cigarettes with it. ---
**Author:** ![80sHairMetalMaven](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/8/ed655f/32.png) [@80sHairMetalMaven](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/80sHairMetalMaven)\ **Post date:** [July 24, 2003, 1:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/jesus-rhinestone-christ-with-a-ruby-loincloth/190610/9 "2003-07-24T13:28:44Z")
ROTFLMAO Ok, that’s the second time I’ve shot lemonade out my nose. You guys owe me a new monitor.😃 IDBB ---
**Author:** ![garius](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/e19b73/32.png) [@garius](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/garius)\ **Post date:** [July 24, 2003, 1:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/jesus-rhinestone-christ-with-a-ruby-loincloth/190610/10 "2003-07-24T13:37:13Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by jjimm \* > \*\*I picked up a gruesome, bejewelled crucifix on a chain last time I was in Dubai. > > The really cool thing about it was that if you pushed down Jesus’ head, a flame shot out of his hand. A friend of mine went round the pub wearing it, saying “have you seen the light of Jesus?” then lighting their cigarettes with it. \*\* Oh good god. You have no idea how badly i want one… ---
**Author:** ![lieu](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/c2a13f/32.png) [@lieu](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lieu)\ **Post date:** [July 24, 2003, 1:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/jesus-rhinestone-christ-with-a-ruby-loincloth/190610/11 "2003-07-24T13:39:42Z")
_Jesus mooned to east, Jesus mooned to the west, Eve knows where his moon shined the best_ ---
**Author:** ![detop](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/bcef8e/32.png) [@detop](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/detop)\ **Post date:** [July 24, 2003, 1:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/jesus-rhinestone-christ-with-a-ruby-loincloth/190610/12 "2003-07-24T13:42:24Z")
Great, now I have this song in my head. _Like a Rhinestone Jesus Riding on a neck Another star spangled piece of dreck Rhinestone Jesus_ ---
**Author:** ![Eve](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/9e8a1a/32.png) [@Eve](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Eve)\ **Post date:** [July 24, 2003, 1:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/jesus-rhinestone-christ-with-a-ruby-loincloth/190610/13 "2003-07-24T13:43:37Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by lieu \* > \*\*_Jesus mooned to east, Jesus mooned to the west, > Eve knows where his moon shined the best_ \*\* Well, except, no—I kept hoping the train would lurch and Liberace Jesus would flip over so I could see if he had a rhinestone butt, too. No such luck. The kicky little ruby loincloth, by the way, was _fabulous_—very Sarah Jessica Parker. ---
**Author:** ![plnnr](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/7ea924/32.png) [@plnnr](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/plnnr)\ **Post date:** [July 24, 2003, 2:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/jesus-rhinestone-christ-with-a-ruby-loincloth/190610/14 "2003-07-24T14:52:10Z")
“Just lift your ruby loincloth three times and say…There’s no place like…” Wait a minute, I think I’m confused. ---
**Author:** ![LorieSmurf](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/a587f6/32.png) [@LorieSmurf](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/LorieSmurf)\ **Post date:** [July 25, 2003, 10:09am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/jesus-rhinestone-christ-with-a-ruby-loincloth/190610/15 "2003-07-25T10:09:19Z")
It would be better if the flame came out of his ass. ---
**Author:** ![Mockingbird](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/c68b51/32.png) [@Mockingbird](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mockingbird)\ **Post date:** [July 25, 2003, 10:39am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/jesus-rhinestone-christ-with-a-ruby-loincloth/190610/16 "2003-07-25T10:39:56Z")
That is the tackiest thing I have heard about in ages. ---
**Author:** ![Pebbles131](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/eada6e/32.png) [@Pebbles131](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Pebbles131)\ **Post date:** [July 25, 2003, 10:52am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/jesus-rhinestone-christ-with-a-ruby-loincloth/190610/17 "2003-07-25T10:52:09Z")
Class, pure class! ---
**Author:** ![chattywine](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/5daacb/32.png) [@chattywine](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/chattywine)\ **Post date:** [July 25, 2003, 11:02am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/jesus-rhinestone-christ-with-a-ruby-loincloth/190610/18 "2003-07-25T11:02:28Z")
GAAAAA!! It’s been 15 minutes since I first read this thread and I CAN’T get the damn Rhinestone Jesus song outta my head. Ahem, thanks for sharing. ---
**Author:** ![Liberal](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/848f3c/32.png) [@Liberal](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Liberal)\ **Post date:** [July 25, 2003, 1:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/jesus-rhinestone-christ-with-a-ruby-loincloth/190610/19 "2003-07-25T13:33:53Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Eve \* > \*\*No, I’n not cussing—this is exactly what I saw on the subway this morning. A gentleman was wearing it on a chain around his neck, and it was dangling hypnotically in front of me all the way to 33rd Street. > > It was about two inches long, and Jesus was made entirely of “diamonds,” and was wearing a kicky little “ruby” loincloth. He didn’t even have a cross behind him: he was just standing there, knees slightly bent and arms outstretched, as if he were belting out “Mammy” at the Palace Theater. > > It was Odd. \*\* I bet you were glad you saw it. “Oh, frabjous day!” you must have exclaimed. “Now I can run to the SDMB and rag on that horrible Jesus fellow and piss off all the Christians who adore and worship Him.” Whether it is a child praying, a person feeling blessed, or a man expressing his faith with a necklace, you seem unable to help yourself — you are bound and determined to ridicule, provoke, and disrespect anything and everything to do with God and those who believe in Him. Your threads are rather like a busted bagpipe that manages to eek out only one low, droning note. You might feign being misunderstood, and hide behind a pretext of just relating what you saw. But the fact that you framed your title in a such a manner that you felt it necessary to begin your OP with a disclaimer belies what your intentions were here. In any case, I’m glad you got the opportunity to get your jollies. You have your reward. Enjoy. ---
**Author:** ![lachesis](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/848f3c/32.png) [@lachesis](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lachesis)\ **Post date:** [July 25, 2003, 1:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/jesus-rhinestone-christ-with-a-ruby-loincloth/190610/20 "2003-07-25T13:40:41Z")
oh, for God’s sake (pun/no pun, your choice) **Libertarian** , GET A GRIP! life-long Catholic ringing in here. i see no disrespect to God, Jesus, Christians or any others in the OP. what i DO see is commentary on _taste_. as in “what **were** they thinking when someone designed that lil’ sparkler? and where can i get some of whatever the hell they were on???” [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/jesus-rhinestone-christ-with-a-ruby-loincloth/190610.md?page=2)