Welcome to the family, Margeuerite. As I’m sure you are aware, converts should be considered just as Jewish, if not more so, than those born into the Tribe. It’s shameful that you would have been treated otherwise and I am pleased that you have found a community where you feel at home.
I have a question for you. I have always heard that an unusually large number of people who feel drawn to Judaism and convert on their own (i.e. not because they are marrying a Jew) end up finding out that they have Jewish blood about which they were unaware. Is there any chance that you have some Jewish ancestors?
It takes a very specific type of person to feel at home in the Satmar community in Brooklyn, for instance, and though I have no objection to the way of life per se, I know it wouldn’t be right for me. I honestly believe that, even having been born into an Orthodox family, I would probably react the same way you did to the idea of living in such a Chassidish community.
Of course, it’s possible to be Lubavitch without living in an exclusively Lubavitch community; I know of many people who grew up Jewish but unaffiliated and became religious though the efforts of Lubavitchers. Those people often retain Lubavitch customs even while living in other communities.
Something funny-- After reading your post in this thread, I honestly thought you were an Orthodox Jew and was surprised, because I thought I knew of all the Orthodox dopers. Mystery solved, I guess! How long have you been studying to convert? You’ve obviously become pretty knowledgable.
Thank you, **hajario! ** I’ve heard that too, and I hope it’s true in my case. My mother’s parents came over from Croatia, and I’ve always planned to begin some serious genealogical research, but I’ve just not had the time. Interestingly enough, my Chabad rabbi asked me that question when he first met me, because he said I had “Semitic features.” However, I will say that it helps to “look Jewish” when visiting Boro Park or checking out Orthodox shuls because it helps me to avoid too much scrutiny.
**Zahava, ** I appreciate your compliment. I’ve been studying for about four years, but I’ve had a serious intention to convert for the past two years. There is a great deal more to learn. It’s funny because when I first started going to shuls, I would immediately tell everyone I was not Jewish, so that if I made a mistake no one would be offended. The downside to this approach is that people were often reluctant to speak to me about advanced topics because they assumed I was still learning the basics of the faith. Now I’m more comfortable about entering debates, but it’s still hard to lose that initial self-consciousness.
If they’re all Reform, it’s an amazing coincidence.
You’ll find lots of synagogues throughout the United States with the same name. Names like Emanu-El, Beth Zion, Beth El, Beth David, Beth Shalom, and so on are the Jewish equivalent of “Bethany [denomination] Church,” “Trinity [denomination] Church” or “Calvary [denomination] Church”. The Bethany Lutheran Church in Kansas City and Bethany Lutheran Church in Seattle could belong to the same synod, but otherwise they’re unrelated.
Regarding determining the branch of Judaism from a synagogue name: if you see a pattern of “[name of street] (‘Street’ or ‘Road’) (‘Synagogue’ or ‘Shul’)”, for example “Taylor Road Shul” or “Green Road Synagogue”, it’s probably Orthodox. There’s usually a formal Hebrew name, but most congregants will call it by the more informal location-based name. In Cleveland, Fairmount Temple (Anshe Chesed) on Fairmount Boulevard may sound Orthodox, but it’s actually very Reform; the street suffix is missing, and the word “Temple” is in the informal name.
If the informal name contains “shul,” it’s definitely Orthodox, and usually very Orthodox.
All Chabad House and Young Israel congregations are related (I think), and Orthodox. Supposedly Chabad House congregations, unlike many other Orthodox congregations, are very welcoming to non-Orthodox visitors.
This observation is probably wrong, but I noticed that the majority of North American synagogues with “Shaarey” in the name are Conservative.
An afterthought: in the Cleveland area the formaliy of dress you see at Reform services is proportional to the size of the congregation. Larger congregations like Tifereth Israel – which also tend to have the most affluent members – tend to wear their Friday best, Friday casual is the norm at mid-sized congregations like Emanu El and Suburban Temple, and jeans not that unusual of a sight at the smaller, more working-class congregations.
Congregants at local Conservative synagogues seem to dress a bit less formally than those at simialrly sized Reform congregations. Short sleeve polo shorts are almost never seen at the regular services of large Reform temples, but it’s not unusual at the big Conservative synagogues.
I found that Friday casual – nice khaki pants with a dark colored dress shirt, and maybe a tweed jacket – is usually a safe bet at any Reform and Conservative congregation. You might look a bit out-of-place among the suits at the big temples, but it’s a sure bet that others at the service will be dressed similarly, and you won’t be looked down upon.