# Johnny Cornpone: stupid is as stupid does **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [November 18, 2004, 12:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/johnny-cornpone-stupid-is-as-stupid-does/275444 "2004-11-18T12:19:02Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 2\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Liberal](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/848f3c/32.png) [@Liberal](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Liberal)\ **Post date:** [November 18, 2004, 12:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/johnny-cornpone-stupid-is-as-stupid-does/275444/1 "2004-11-18T12:19:02Z")
From here: [http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showpost.php?p=5501381&postcount=19](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showpost.php?p=5501381&postcount=19) > [@BobLibDem](#): > > 1- Bush is not an idiot. Well, yes he is. And yes, many who voted for him are too. If you believe that Iraq and 9/11 were in any way connected, and you voted for him for that reason alone, then you’re a taco short of a combo plate. I believe there are enough of those morons out there who believe that to make all the difference in what should have been a Kerry blowout. I’m sure you realize, being that you’re as smart as you are, that you’ve made a doxastic assertion about a deontic state. Let’s examine the facts. Only 15% of voters even considered Iraq to be an important issue. Of those, the vast majority (73%) voted for Kerry. If every one of those voters had voted for Kerry, the percentage of popular vote would have been reversed — Bush would have gotten 48% to Kerry’s 51%. Unless you consider Bush’s victory to have been a blowout, you are hard put to explain why Kerry, bringing in the same numbers, would qualify for blowout status. Regarding your assertion about morons, however, you might be dead-on. It so happens that 92% of Democrats in Congress, voting on House Resolution 757 (September 9, 2004), agreed with this statement: “The al-Zarqawi terror network used Baghdad as a base of operations to coordinate the movement of people, money, and supplies and thousands of families have lost loved ones in the defense of freedom and liberty against the tyranny of terror.” The al-Zarqawi network, of course, verified its allegiance to Osama Bin Laden and al-Qaeda in an announcement on October 17, 2004, just a couple of weeks before the election. Perhaps they considered the resolution supported by your moronic Democrat leaders to be binding on them. > [@](#): > > 2- Kofi Annan is not an Oracle. Nor is he a Sybase. But he has more credibility throughout the world than Bush’s stooge, Allawi. Bush shat mightily on the UN and rushed to war. For the next four years, the US can expect diddly squat in the way of cooperation from any potential legitimate partners in Iraq. A reasonable case can be made that the appropriate thing to do with a corruption-filled cesspool is to shit in it. Cato calls the UN a “miasma of corruption”, and if you check the source below, you can see why. Moreover, you can check the Heritage Foundation source to see why Kofi Annan’s worldwide credibility is shrinking like George Costanza’s penis in an ice-cold fishing pond. > [@](#): > > 3- Michael Moore is not everyman. Well, duh. Who said he was? He performed a great public service in showing so forcefully that the emperor had no clothes and wasn’t particularly well hung. He may not relate terribly well to Johnny Cracker, but who cares? They aren’t going our way any way. And I personally am especially proud of Moore for wearing his Michigan State cap all over. That rhetorical bile is why I brought this to the Pit, which is where your dumbass comment belonged in the first place. Just whom the hell are you referencing with your “Johnny Cracker”? White people? People from Georgia? Southerners as a whole? People as brain-fucked as yourself? Or what? Ever since you started this inexplicable mud-slinging at Southerners, I’ve tried to figure out what it is about you that makes you think you’re so fucking smart. I mean, you can’t even build a sentence properly. Michael Moore wears his Michigan State cap “all over”? What — does it hang from his erection sometimes? Does he wear it on his ass? Does it often hang from his nose? I don’t know what you think you’ve contributed that qualifies you to sit there picking your nose and rolling up your boogers as you struggle to splice together a few basic vocabulary elements into semi-coherent phrases that are intended to denounce others in whole regions and classes as idiots. You’re talking with your balls. Your balls might be big, but your brain is a mite puny. The fact that you are willing to completely alienate voters means that you are your enemy’s best friend. See, the thing is, dumbshit, Michael Moore related _quite_ well with your opposition. The consider him to have been instrumental in their victory. It is you whom he duped. He is the man who said that Bill Clinton was the best Republican President the US ever had. He is the man who said that he is “the anti-Democrat”, and that the Democratic Party is “weak-kneed” and “wimpy”. He said that you’ve “let the working people down across this country”. He didn’t vote for Clinton in '96, and he didn’t vote for Gore in '00. But he managed to convince you and your moron leaders (the ones who tied 9/11 to Iraq) to give him a stump from which he could preach, as your honored guest at the Democratic National Convention. By the way, way to go on that corn cross-fertilization thing at MSU in the 1870s. You boys are one hell of a farming college. > [@](#): > > 4- Some American women are conservative. Well, duh. We recognize that not all women value reproductive freedom. But those people don’t vote our way anyway. Kerry did not lose any Democratic votes among right wing females, there were no votes there to lose. You’re right, if by “some” you mean 55% of white women (the ones you would likely call “conservative”). They voted for Bush. Even non-white women gave Bush a fourth of all their support. And actually, Kerry _did_ lose some so-called “liberals” — 13% of them, to be exact. Plus, he lost 25% of voters who thought abortion should be always illegal, and 38% of voters who thought abortion should be mostly illegal. > [@](#): > > 5- You can’t lead the country while leaving the country. Not many are. I personally would love to emigrate to Canada on retirement, but hopefully before that comes to pass, the US will turn sharply to the left. > > The last thing the Dems need is to turn right. Iraq was an anomaly- without it and 9/11, Bush would have been blown out far beyond Rove’s ability to steal elections. So thank you, Mr. Durkin, but I for one will stay the course. Of course you will. There’s always one more booger to dig out. Sources: [http://www.cnn.com/ELECTION/2004/pages/results/states/US/P/00/epolls.0.html](http://www.cnn.com/ELECTION/2004/pages/results/states/US/P/00/epolls.0.html) [http://www.cnn.com/ELECTION/2004/pages/results/president/](http://www.cnn.com/ELECTION/2004/pages/results/president/) > **[Republicrats Still Linking Iraq to 9/11 - Antiwar.com Original](https://original.antiwar.com/zunes/2004/10/14/republicrats-still-linking-iraq-to-911/)** > > On the eve of the third anniversary of 9/11, the U.S. House of Representatives by an overwhelming, bipartisan majority of 406-16 passed a - Stephen Zunes for Antiwar.com Original [http://www.gop.gov/Committeecentral/bills/hres757.asp](http://www.gop.gov/Committeecentral/bills/hres757.asp) [http://clerk.house.gov/evs/2004/roll431.xml](http://clerk.house.gov/evs/2004/roll431.xml) [http://www.cnn.com/2004/WORLD/meast/10/17/al.zarqawi.statement/](http://www.cnn.com/2004/WORLD/meast/10/17/al.zarqawi.statement/) [http://www.cato.org/pubs/pas/pa-253.html](http://www.cato.org/pubs/pas/pa-253.html) [http://www.heritage.org/Research/InternationalOrganizations/wm589.cfm](http://www.heritage.org/Research/InternationalOrganizations/wm589.cfm) [http://www.michaelmoore.com/words/message/index.php?messageDate=2000-08-13](http://www.michaelmoore.com/words/message/index.php?messageDate=2000-08-13) [http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/5239322/](http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/5239322/) ---
**Author:** ![lieu](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/c2a13f/32.png) [@lieu](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lieu)\ **Post date:** [November 18, 2004, 2:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/johnny-cornpone-stupid-is-as-stupid-does/275444/2 "2004-11-18T14:21:29Z")
**Liberal** , some days you appear in need of a canvas garmet and then others, like today, you’re spot on.