# Jokes that just need to DIE ALREADY **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [February 26, 2015, 3:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/jokes-that-just-need-to-die-already/713664 "2015-02-26T15:14:14Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 11
**Author:** ![Mosier](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/7ea924/32.png) [@Mosier](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mosier)\ **Post date:** [March 2, 2015, 5:37am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/jokes-that-just-need-to-die-already/713664/201 "2015-03-02T05:37:37Z")
> [@Chefguy](#): > > Well, there are 10 kinds of people. . . Yeah, those who understand binary, those who don’t, and those who didn’t expect the joke to be written in base 3. ---
**Author:** ![Your\_Great\_Darsh\_Face](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/y/ac8455/32.png) [@Your\_Great\_Darsh\_Face](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Your_Great_Darsh_Face)\ **Post date:** [March 2, 2015, 12:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/jokes-that-just-need-to-die-already/713664/202 "2015-03-02T12:43:04Z")
> [@panache45](#): > > And then there are the constant jokes about gay men and anal sex. Is there any joke that’s not been done to death, any “clever” association still to be made? And jesus, I still hear occasional AIDS jokes! Which I guess would certainly count as being done to death, yes? ---
**Author:** ![naita](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/naita/32/5862_2.png) [@naita](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/naita)\ **Post date:** [March 2, 2015, 1:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/jokes-that-just-need-to-die-already/713664/203 "2015-03-02T13:01:45Z")
> [@Mosier](#): > > Yeah, those who understand binary, those who don’t, and those who didn’t expect the joke to be written in base 3. The two first categories cover everyone, so the third one has to consist of people belonging to one or the other. ---
**Author:** ![Just\_Asking\_Questions](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/ba9def/32.png) [@Just\_Asking\_Questions](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Just_Asking_Questions)\ **Post date:** [March 2, 2015, 3:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/jokes-that-just-need-to-die-already/713664/204 "2015-03-02T15:50:56Z")
> [@kaylasdad99](#): > > Then they’d all have to be moved to Great Debates, because witnessing. And can we get rid of these “verb removal” sentences, or whatever you’d want to call them. Because annoying. ---
**Author:** ![RTFirefly](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/c77e96/32.png) [@RTFirefly](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RTFirefly)\ **Post date:** [March 2, 2015, 7:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/jokes-that-just-need-to-die-already/713664/205 "2015-03-02T19:15:51Z")
> [@Monty](#): > > Those of us who, IRL, she stabbed in the back repeatedly have exactly zero problems remembering her for something other than her stupid joke. Gotta admit, this is the first time I’ve heard this accusation leveled at her. But rather than hijack this thread, I’ve [given it its own thread](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=750666). Feel free to stop by. ---
**Author:** ![Velocity](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/velocity/32/18006_2.png) [@Velocity](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Velocity)\ **Post date:** [March 2, 2015, 7:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/jokes-that-just-need-to-die-already/713664/206 "2015-03-02T19:38:13Z")
This isn’t exactly a joke, but it’s irritating when used as a witticism: **“If the black box is indestructible, then why isn’t the airplane built out of black box material?”** – this is so face-palming it hardly requires deconstruction, but again, the black boxes are tough due to shape which an airplane cannot have; if a tough airplane crashes at 500 mph the occupants will still die; the airplane needs to be fuel-efficient, etc. ---
**Author:** ![Stringer](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/eb8c5e/32.png) [@Stringer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Stringer)\ **Post date:** [March 2, 2015, 7:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/jokes-that-just-need-to-die-already/713664/207 "2015-03-02T19:58:33Z")
1. Whatever 2. ??? 3. Profit ---
**Author:** ![FXMastermind](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/fxmastermind/32/7289_2.png) [@FXMastermind](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/FXMastermind)\ **Post date:** [March 2, 2015, 11:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/jokes-that-just-need-to-die-already/713664/208 "2015-03-02T23:13:59Z")
> [@Anaamika](#): > > This is the one I hate the most. Opal has passed away, and there are better ways of remembering her than a tired old joke. Yeah, like an entire NEW Pit thread about her. ---
**Author:** ![Ambivalid](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/a5b964/32.png) [@Ambivalid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ambivalid)\ **Post date:** [March 3, 2015, 12:53am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/jokes-that-just-need-to-die-already/713664/209 "2015-03-03T00:53:26Z")
\<_people pass me in my wheelchair_\> “Hey, got a license fer that thing!” Yuk, yuk, yuk. :dubious: “Slow down, you’ll get a ticket in that thing!” Yuk, yuk, yuk. :dubious: “Watch out! Don’t run me over! You need a horn on that thing!” Yuk, yuk, yuk. :dubious: :dubious: Fucking hilarious. And original. ---
**Author:** ![drewtwo99](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/d07c76/32.png) [@drewtwo99](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/drewtwo99)\ **Post date:** [March 3, 2015, 1:31am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/jokes-that-just-need-to-die-already/713664/210 "2015-03-03T01:31:52Z")
Those jokes are so la… terrible! ---
**Author:** ![DrDeth](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/b487fb/32.png) [@DrDeth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DrDeth)\ **Post date:** [March 3, 2015, 5:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/jokes-that-just-need-to-die-already/713664/211 "2015-03-03T17:57:46Z")
> [@Velocity](#): > > This isn’t exactly a joke, but it’s irritating when used as a witticism: > **“If the black box is indestructible, then why isn’t the airplane built out of black box material?”** – this is so face-palming it hardly requires deconstruction, but again, the black boxes are tough due to shape which an airplane cannot have; if a tough airplane crashes at 500 mph the occupants will still die; the airplane needs to be fuel-efficient, etc. One FAA guy had a great answer to that “Because the interstates aren’t wide enough.” (in that the plane couldnt take off so it’d have to run along the freeway." ---
**Author:** ![Freddy\_the\_Pig](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/a587f6/32.png) [@Freddy\_the\_Pig](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Freddy_the_Pig)\ **Post date:** [March 3, 2015, 7:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/jokes-that-just-need-to-die-already/713664/212 "2015-03-03T19:37:23Z")
Fuckety fuck fuck, the Monty Python [won’t stop](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showpost.php?p=18177790&postcount=29). ---
**Author:** ![Anaamika](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/5f9b8f/32.png) [@Anaamika](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Anaamika)\ **Post date:** [March 3, 2015, 8:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/jokes-that-just-need-to-die-already/713664/213 "2015-03-03T20:35:57Z")
Oooo, anybody who says, “Working hard or hardly working?” or “Huuuuuump Day!” needs to be beaten to death with their own shoe. ---
**Author:** ![Yllaria](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/yllaria/32/3452_2.png) [@Yllaria](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Yllaria)\ **Post date:** [March 3, 2015, 8:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/jokes-that-just-need-to-die-already/713664/214 "2015-03-03T20:44:06Z")
> [@running\_coach](#): > > I thought it was the water. Back in the time before Taco Bell, the “Mexican” food served in the US was often spicey, at least compared to what else was available. The idea was that it could blow out your digestive system if you weren’t used to it. Now I’d say Get Off My Lawn, but you whippersnappers have probably already heard that too many times. ---
**Author:** ![eschereal](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/eschereal/32/18939_2.png) [@eschereal](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/eschereal)\ **Post date:** [March 3, 2015, 8:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/jokes-that-just-need-to-die-already/713664/215 "2015-03-03T20:51:11Z")
_Sam! Can’t you do something about these terrorists?_ It’s my lunch hour. Besides, it’s not my department. ---
**Author:** ![silenus](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/silenus/32/166_2.png) [@silenus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/silenus)\ **Post date:** [March 3, 2015, 9:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/jokes-that-just-need-to-die-already/713664/216 "2015-03-03T21:20:29Z")
> [@Freddy\_the\_Pig](#): > > Fuckety fuck fuck, the Monty Python [won’t stop](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showpost.php?p=18177790&postcount=29). Not even when stomped upon by a giant foot. ---
**Author:** ![Spectre\_of\_Pithecanthropus](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/spectre_of_pithecanthropus/32/12343_2.png) [@Spectre\_of\_Pithecanthropus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Spectre_of_Pithecanthropus)\ **Post date:** [March 3, 2015, 10:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/jokes-that-just-need-to-die-already/713664/217 "2015-03-03T22:19:57Z")
> [@Darth\_Panda](#): > > And what’s the deal with airline peanuts? > > I mean, who are we trying to keep out of these things? Making the packages so difficult to open means they don’t need to post the “May Contain Nuts” warning on the outside of every plane. ---
**Author:** ![FXMastermind](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/fxmastermind/32/7289_2.png) [@FXMastermind](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/FXMastermind)\ **Post date:** [March 4, 2015, 3:18am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/jokes-that-just-need-to-die-already/713664/218 "2015-03-04T03:18:30Z")
> [@Just\_Asking\_Questions](#): > > Because annoying. I really think some people actually believe, I mean really deep down in their dark little hearts, they actually believe other people don’t really mean to be annoying. That if only these annoying fuckwits understood that their tired old jokes are annoying, then they would stop doing it, because … something You could not be more wrong. ` ---
**Author:** ![eschereal](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/eschereal/32/18939_2.png) [@eschereal](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/eschereal)\ **Post date:** [March 5, 2015, 7:28am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/jokes-that-just-need-to-die-already/713664/219 "2015-03-05T07:28:08Z")
> [@silenus](#): > > Not even when stomped upon by a giant foot. well, now, that was something completely different ---
**Author:** ![elucidator](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/8edcca/32.png) [@elucidator](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/elucidator)\ **Post date:** [March 5, 2015, 7:44am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/jokes-that-just-need-to-die-already/713664/220 "2015-03-05T07:44:08Z")
Giant foot crush last potato. Latvia sad. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/jokes-that-just-need-to-die-already/713664.md?page=10) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/jokes-that-just-need-to-die-already/713664.md?page=12)