# Jokes that take time to sink in **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [December 1, 2005, 4:56am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/jokes-that-take-time-to-sink-in/333519 "2005-12-01T04:56:54Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![control-z](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/eada6e/32.png) [@control-z](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/control-z)\ **Post date:** [December 1, 2005, 4:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/jokes-that-take-time-to-sink-in/333519/21 "2005-12-01T16:39:24Z")
Oooh! I get it! I get jokes… ahahahahahahaha ---
**Author:** ![Kythereia](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/e8c25b/32.png) [@Kythereia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kythereia)\ **Post date:** [December 1, 2005, 4:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/jokes-that-take-time-to-sink-in/333519/22 "2005-12-01T16:44:17Z")
> [@Kalhoun](#): > > Old Italian guy comes to America and wins the lottery. He decides to have a beautiful mansion built. He tells the builder he wants a statue in every room. > > So the mansion is finally completed. After months of scouring the world, the statues are all put in place. > > The old Italian guy walks in, looks around and goes into a rage. “Ima tell you I wanna da statue in every-a room-a. I look around I no see-a no statue!” > > The builder says, “What are you talking about? I’ve gone to the ends of the Earth and found original Picassos, DaVincis, and all the other statues that are considered to be the most beautiful in all the world!” > > The old Italian guy says, “No! No! I’m a-lookin’-a for a STATUE!” (mimes the dialing of a phone and holds his hand up to his ear) “Hello! Statue?” …I think I get it, but I’m not sure… _scratches head_ ---
**Author:** ![YaWanna](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/y/bbce88/32.png) [@YaWanna](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/YaWanna)\ **Post date:** [December 1, 2005, 4:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/jokes-that-take-time-to-sink-in/333519/23 "2005-12-01T16:57:51Z")
I get hung up on the fact that DaVinci & Picasso are not known for their _sculpture_ work - they are famous as _painters_. But I get all the jokes so far. ---
**Author:** ![Improv\_Geek](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/b3f665/32.png) [@Improv\_Geek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Improv_Geek)\ **Post date:** [December 1, 2005, 4:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/jokes-that-take-time-to-sink-in/333519/24 "2005-12-01T16:58:51Z")
[…] What do you call that show? [beat] The Aristocrats! ---
**Author:** ![Inigo\_Montoya](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/inigo_montoya/32/124_2.png) [@Inigo\_Montoya](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Inigo_Montoya)\ **Post date:** [December 1, 2005, 5:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/jokes-that-take-time-to-sink-in/333519/25 "2005-12-01T17:11:42Z")
It’s an audio. “Hello, is that you?” = Hollow statue? ---
**Author:** ![Kalhoun](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/3bc359/32.png) [@Kalhoun](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kalhoun)\ **Post date:** [December 1, 2005, 5:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/jokes-that-take-time-to-sink-in/333519/26 "2005-12-01T17:12:16Z")
> [@YaWanna](#): > > I get hung up on the fact that DaVinci & Picasso are not known for their _sculpture_ work - they are famous as _painters_. > > But I get all the jokes so far. I probably could have used more recognizable examples of sculpture (though you don’t get much more famous than the Picasso sculpture in Chicago), but it’s irrelevant to the joke. Insert Michelangelo and Rodin. Better? ---
**Author:** ![Kythereia](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/e8c25b/32.png) [@Kythereia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kythereia)\ **Post date:** [December 1, 2005, 5:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/jokes-that-take-time-to-sink-in/333519/27 "2005-12-01T17:23:45Z")
> [@Inigo Montoya](#): > > It’s an audio. “Hello, is that you?” = Hollow statue? But he’s not looking for a hollow statue, just a statue. It still makes no sense. 😕 ---
**Author:** ![YaWanna](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/y/bbce88/32.png) [@YaWanna](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/YaWanna)\ **Post date:** [December 1, 2005, 5:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/jokes-that-take-time-to-sink-in/333519/28 "2005-12-01T17:25:54Z")
> [@Kalhoun](#): > > I probably could have used more recognizable examples of sculpture (though you don’t get much more famous than the Picasso sculpture in Chicago), but it’s irrelevant to the joke. Insert Michelangelo and Rodin. Better? Mucho mas mejor. 🙂 > [@Kythereia](#): > > But he’s not looking for a hollow statue, just a statue. It still makes no sense. Seriously, are you whooshing us? ---
**Author:** ![TellMeI\_mNotCrazy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tellmei_mnotcrazy/32/3419_2.png) [@TellMeI\_mNotCrazy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TellMeI_mNotCrazy)\ **Post date:** [December 1, 2005, 5:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/jokes-that-take-time-to-sink-in/333519/29 "2005-12-01T17:32:07Z")
> [@Kalhoun](#): > > I probably could have used more recognizable examples of sculpture (though you don’t get much more famous than the Picasso sculpture in Chicago), but it’s irrelevant to the joke. Insert Michelangelo and Rodin. Better? I don’t think the hollow belongs there. “Hello, statue?” is “Hello, is that you ['s datchoo]?” So he calls a phone a “statue” because that’s his typical greeting and he doesn’t know the proper word. Sort of contrived, I think… ---
**Author:** ![Inigo\_Montoya](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/inigo_montoya/32/124_2.png) [@Inigo\_Montoya](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Inigo_Montoya)\ **Post date:** [December 1, 2005, 6:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/jokes-that-take-time-to-sink-in/333519/30 "2005-12-01T18:06:28Z")
> [@Kythereia](#): > > But he’s not looking for a hollow statue, just a statue. It still makes no sense. 😕 Back in '79 I had a copy of _The Official Polish/Italian Joke Book_ Such literature is scarce these days, but I distinctly remember this joke. The old man’s request, as the joke was published therein, is indeed for a “hollow statue” in each room. I hope this clears things up. ---
**Author:** ![Inigo\_Montoya](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/inigo_montoya/32/124_2.png) [@Inigo\_Montoya](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Inigo_Montoya)\ **Post date:** [December 1, 2005, 6:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/jokes-that-take-time-to-sink-in/333519/31 "2005-12-01T18:09:53Z")
This horse ain’t dead yet! [Link](http://www.shoptcs.com/cjp/gen/36.htm) to an impartial site. ---
**Author:** ![Kalhoun](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/3bc359/32.png) [@Kalhoun](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kalhoun)\ **Post date:** [December 1, 2005, 6:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/jokes-that-take-time-to-sink-in/333519/32 "2005-12-01T18:10:15Z")
Sigh…thanks to those of you who got it. I think it’s pretty clever! ---
**Author:** ![Kalhoun](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/3bc359/32.png) [@Kalhoun](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kalhoun)\ **Post date:** [December 1, 2005, 6:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/jokes-that-take-time-to-sink-in/333519/33 "2005-12-01T18:11:51Z")
> [@Inigo Montoya](#): > > Back in '79 I had a copy of _The Official Polish/Italian Joke Book_ Such literature is scarce these days, but I distinctly remember this joke. The old man’s request, as the joke was published therein, is indeed for a “hollow statue” in each room. > > I hope this clears things up. I don’t think it loses anything by making it a plain ol’ statue, do you? ---
**Author:** ![Kythereia](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/e8c25b/32.png) [@Kythereia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kythereia)\ **Post date:** [December 1, 2005, 6:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/jokes-that-take-time-to-sink-in/333519/34 "2005-12-01T18:23:47Z")
> [@YaWanna](#): > > Seriously, are you whooshing us? No, I’m just stupid. I think I’m going to go console myself with a copy of _War and Peace_ now. ---
**Author:** ![Kalhoun](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/3bc359/32.png) [@Kalhoun](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kalhoun)\ **Post date:** [December 1, 2005, 6:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/jokes-that-take-time-to-sink-in/333519/35 "2005-12-01T18:28:19Z")
> [@Kythereia](#): > > No, I’m just stupid. > > I think I’m going to go console myself with a copy of _War and Peace_ now. Have it your way…but it’s not as funny as the joke! 😉 ---
**Author:** ![DanBlather](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/f4b2a3/32.png) [@DanBlather](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DanBlather)\ **Post date:** [December 1, 2005, 6:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/jokes-that-take-time-to-sink-in/333519/36 "2005-12-01T18:29:41Z")
> [@Kythereia](#): > > I think I’m going to go console myself with a copy of _War and Peace_ now. I don’t get it. ---
**Author:** ![Troy\_McClure\_SF](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/troy_mcclure_sf/32/4150_2.png) [@Troy\_McClure\_SF](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Troy_McClure_SF)\ **Post date:** [December 1, 2005, 6:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/jokes-that-take-time-to-sink-in/333519/37 "2005-12-01T18:35:00Z")
> [@soulmurk](#): > > Two guys walk into a bar; the third one ducks. > My own unscientific tests have it at about a 1:3 ratio of people who get it (though I’d expect much higher from this crowd). I use this all the time, I get about the same results. ---
**Author:** ![Beware\_of\_Doug](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/278dde/32.png) [@Beware\_of\_Doug](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Beware_of_Doug)\ **Post date:** [December 1, 2005, 6:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/jokes-that-take-time-to-sink-in/333519/38 "2005-12-01T18:36:58Z")
> [@Beware of Doug](#): > > **Smoker:** Doc, I’m having trouble applying the nicotine patch you prescribed last week. > **Doctor:** It’s easy. You just peel off the back and stick it on. > **S:** Ok, but do you remember you said to put on a new one every 6 hours? > **D:** That’s right. > **S:** Well, I’m running out of room. The doctor never told him to take off the old patch before putting on the new one. ---
**Author:** ![Robot\_Arm](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/robot_arm/32/18280_2.png) [@Robot\_Arm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Robot_Arm)\ **Post date:** [December 1, 2005, 6:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/jokes-that-take-time-to-sink-in/333519/39 "2005-12-01T18:46:43Z")
A drunk is walking down the street in London. He sees a car pulled to the side of the road, and the driver has the hood up and is looking at the engine. DRUNK: What’s the trouble? DRIVER: Piston broke. DRUNK: So am I. ---
**Author:** ![Electronic\_Chaos](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/bbe5ce/32.png) [@Electronic\_Chaos](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Electronic_Chaos)\ **Post date:** [December 1, 2005, 6:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/jokes-that-take-time-to-sink-in/333519/40 "2005-12-01T18:49:57Z")
Why do cowgirls walk bow-legged? Because cowboys don’t take their hats off to eat. (I told this once to a classmate. Five minutes later she slaps me and says “That’s just wrong!”) [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/jokes-that-take-time-to-sink-in/333519.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/jokes-that-take-time-to-sink-in/333519.md?page=3)