# Judicial Killing by Firing Squad **URL:** \ **Category:** Great Debates\ **Created:** [May 17, 2014, 3:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/judicial-killing-by-firing-squad/688637 "2014-05-17T15:54:43Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 11\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![BrainGlutton](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/82dd89/32.png) [@BrainGlutton](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BrainGlutton)\ **Post date:** [May 17, 2014, 10:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/judicial-killing-by-firing-squad/688637/21 "2014-05-17T22:35:50Z")
> [@eschereal](#): > > Make sure you get them to make one of a special design that employs a gapped stack of thin concave wedges that will mesh into a similar structure at the bottom, so that your head will be launched out over the audience. That would be the awesome way to go. No, I want an arrangement that allows my head to drop into one of five numbered holes. Place your bets! ---
**Author:** ![Johnny\_L.A](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/johnny_l.a/32/1084_2.png) [@Johnny\_L.A](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Johnny_L.A)\ **Post date:** [May 17, 2014, 10:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/judicial-killing-by-firing-squad/688637/22 "2014-05-17T22:37:32Z")
> [@eschereal](#): > > Make sure you get them to make one of a special design that employs a gapped stack of thin concave wedges that will mesh into a similar structure at the bottom, so that your head will be launched out over the audience. That would be the awesome way to go. Maybe [something like this](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=STOTekK7vhs&t=0m45s). That would be awesome. ---
**Author:** ![Trinopus](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/2bfe46/32.png) [@Trinopus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Trinopus)\ **Post date:** [May 17, 2014, 10:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/judicial-killing-by-firing-squad/688637/23 "2014-05-17T22:38:31Z")
> [@Damfino](#): > > One of the reasons is that a firing squad shares the guilt. As I understand it a random member of the squad was issued secretly with a blank cartridge , so no one would be sure if he had fired the fatal shot. The variant on this that I think may be more accurate is so that any member of the squad can claim he only fired the blank. Any real rifleman will know, instantly, if they have just fired a blank, rather than a live round. The difference is beyond obvious. But if the squad has just had to shoot someone the whole Regiment really liked, each man on the squad has “plausible deniability.” I have read a claim (and have no supporting data at all!) that in at least one case, every member of the squad claimed to be the one who fired the blank. ---
**Author:** ![Johnny\_L.A](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/johnny_l.a/32/1084_2.png) [@Johnny\_L.A](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Johnny_L.A)\ **Post date:** [May 17, 2014, 10:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/judicial-killing-by-firing-squad/688637/24 "2014-05-17T22:42:02Z")
> [@Damfino](#): > > One of the reasons is that a firing squad shares the guilt. As I understand it a random member of the squad was issued secretly with a blank cartridge , so no one would be sure if he had fired the fatal shot. [‘Shooting Gallery of Steel’](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Andriza_Mircovich#The_shooting_machine) execution machine. ---
**Author:** ![OffByOne](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/45deac/32.png) [@OffByOne](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/OffByOne)\ **Post date:** [May 18, 2014, 12:38am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/judicial-killing-by-firing-squad/688637/25 "2014-05-18T00:38:06Z")
I liked the execution of the central character’s mother’s boyfriend in the beginning chapters of Neal Stephenson’s “The Diamond Age.” The convicted murderer was injected with millions of nano-machines, which were then distributed throughout his body by his circulatory system. After a suitable delay, each of the nanos exploded, leaving nothing but a pink mist, slowly settling to the ground. ---
**Author:** ![Johnny\_L.A](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/johnny_l.a/32/1084_2.png) [@Johnny\_L.A](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Johnny_L.A)\ **Post date:** [May 18, 2014, 12:52am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/judicial-killing-by-firing-squad/688637/26 "2014-05-18T00:52:06Z")
[Unicorn Executions](http://www.hollywoodreporter.com/sites/default/files/2013/12/51rz0zjppfl_0.jpg) ---
**Author:** ![Slithy\_Tove](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/slithy_tove/32/18248_2.png) [@Slithy\_Tove](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Slithy_Tove)\ **Post date:** [May 18, 2014, 1:45am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/judicial-killing-by-firing-squad/688637/27 "2014-05-18T01:45:50Z")
The Romans were a weird bunch because they came up with the most contrived, painful ways to kill people, but also would simply have the victim kneel so the executioner could thrust a sword between the collarbone straight into the heart, causing almost instant death. I know I’d really hate impalement, waiting hours or days for the point to reach the heart, or sawing; where they hung the victim from his spread legs and set in to work. I’m amazed people have the stomach for this. In fact, over at [Executedtoday.com](http://Executedtoday.com), there’s a video of a modern Iranian hanging. They do it with plain marine synthetic rope, not the special pre-stressed hemp used by the US and UK. And the pull the victim up with a crane, no neck-break. In the video, even the family of the condemned’s victim can’t stand it, so they invoke their right to halt the execution. ---
**Author:** ![BrainGlutton](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/82dd89/32.png) [@BrainGlutton](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BrainGlutton)\ **Post date:** [May 18, 2014, 1:47am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/judicial-killing-by-firing-squad/688637/28 "2014-05-18T01:47:30Z")
Frankly, I don’t know why anyone ever felt obliged to come up with anything more elaborate than a small knife thrust into the back of the neck. ---
**Author:** ![eschereal](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/eschereal/32/18939_2.png) [@eschereal](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/eschereal)\ **Post date:** [May 18, 2014, 3:32am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/judicial-killing-by-firing-squad/688637/29 "2014-05-18T03:32:35Z")
Really, this “humane” thing is nonsense. Capital punishment is not a legitimate deterrent (nor, really, is any kind of “justice”, because most of these guys think they will not get caught, or will get off), its primary function is retribution, so we might as well make it as brutal, gruesome and entertaining as possible. A large, automated clamp gimbaling around while the guy run around trying to avoid it (or chooses not to); when it captures him, it cuts off his head and flings it into a spinning roulette wheel. Might as well turn executions into gambling opportunities (including how long will he avoid the clamp, where will it catch him, and of course, the wheel number). ---
**Author:** ![mascaroni](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/dc4da7/32.png) [@mascaroni](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/mascaroni)\ **Post date:** [May 21, 2014, 11:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/judicial-killing-by-firing-squad/688637/30 "2014-05-21T23:23:59Z")
> [@BrainGlutton](#): > > Still, if I had to choose – guillotine! Guillotine! Guillotine! In a big public square! With crazy old ladies in the front row knitting! And a **drumroll!** 🆒 I’m not having that… the French taking the credit for a British invention. [Gibbet! Gibbet! Gibbet!](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Halifax_Gibbet)… None of the crazy old French ladies though, tha’ll ‘ave to put up with t’ locals wi’ flat caps and whippets… ---
**Author:** ![threeorange](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/b9e5f3/32.png) [@threeorange](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/threeorange)\ **Post date:** [May 21, 2014, 11:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/judicial-killing-by-firing-squad/688637/31 "2014-05-21T23:54:32Z")
For a painless death, I would recommend thermonuclear devices. The offendor would be vaporized instantly. I can’t guarantee there would be no externalities with this form of execution. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/judicial-killing-by-firing-squad/688637.md?page=1)