# Just a bit cruel... **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [September 7, 2000, 10:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/just-a-bit-cruel/32420 "2000-09-07T22:09:40Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 4
**Author:** ![Tymp](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/c5a1d2/32.png) [@Tymp](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tymp)\ **Post date:** [September 8, 2000, 3:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/just-a-bit-cruel/32420/61 "2000-09-08T15:29:49Z")
Now I’m confused, **Freak**. You posted this tale of your sadistic amusement yesterday evening but did not mention this last part about conversing with her about the incident. What’s the actual order and date of events here? Or is some of this bullshit? ---
**Author:** ![SaxFace](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/13edae/32.png) [@SaxFace](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SaxFace)\ **Post date:** [September 8, 2000, 3:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/just-a-bit-cruel/32420/62 "2000-09-08T15:30:32Z")
> [@](#): > > I was actually starting to appreciate the fact that she has a sense of humor and sorta like her even, until she said “If I had known it was you behind me, I probably wouldn’t have worried. I was afraid it was some cracked out nigger with a knife.” I **TOTALLY** do not believe this story. At all. > [@](#): > > Apparently my original assessment of her was correct. Go figure. But I still feel guilty. Sure you do, now that some of us have ragged on you. Interesting, even. ---
**Author:** ![BoBettie](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/4af34b/32.png) [@BoBettie](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BoBettie)\ **Post date:** [September 8, 2000, 3:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/just-a-bit-cruel/32420/63 "2000-09-08T15:34:00Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by FreakFreely \* > \*\*BTW, if it makes you guys feel any better, I talked to her on the bus yesterday. I apologized and admitted that I was playing with her head a bit. > \*\* You are a sad, sick man. I pray that you don’t live near me or my family. You are totally full of shit. That is MY paranoid opinion. Since this is the last time I’ll waste even a second thinking about you, I cordially invite you to take a flying fuck through a rolling donut. Then get some professional help for your issues with women. Sick fucker. Zette (adding one more name to her “People I will never read another post from” list) ---
**Author:** ![ReservoirDog](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/8edcca/32.png) [@ReservoirDog](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ReservoirDog)\ **Post date:** [September 8, 2000, 3:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/just-a-bit-cruel/32420/64 "2000-09-08T15:35:38Z")
Jesus Christ, if I saw [this](http://www.geocities.com/sdpeoplepages/freakfreely.html) staring at me on the bus, I’d be pretty Freak-ed out, too. I think that you really should rethink your philosophy, Mr. Freely. It is a sad fact in our world that women _need_ to be a little bit afraid of any man they don’t know in order to protect themselves. What’s the statistic on sexual assault? 25% of women in their lifetime? More? Too many of my friends live with terrible memories. I don’t mean to in any way throw your actions into the same pile with much more heinous crimes, but I must say that your decision to use the fear of assault to punish a woman that you know absolutely nothing about is utterly reprehensible. ---
**Author:** ![Coldfire](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/a587f6/32.png) [@Coldfire](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Coldfire)\ **Post date:** [September 8, 2000, 3:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/just-a-bit-cruel/32420/65 "2000-09-08T15:35:55Z")
Glad to see I’m not the only one. Freak, shape up will ya. We don’t need another Serlin. ---
**Author:** ![Tymp](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/c5a1d2/32.png) [@Tymp](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tymp)\ **Post date:** [September 8, 2000, 3:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/just-a-bit-cruel/32420/66 "2000-09-08T15:36:54Z")
> [@](#): > > If you are a woman afraid of being raped or stalked or whatever, and you see some guy whose looks/attitude you don’t personally like, or you’re afraid of him, then you DON’T LOOK DOWN on him. You don’t go looking for trouble! Riiiiiight. Women, or anyone who might feel vulnerable, should assume an attitude of submission. Thanks for the insight, ass. ---
**Author:** ![CnoteChris](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/278dde/32.png) [@CnoteChris](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CnoteChris)\ **Post date:** [September 8, 2000, 3:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/just-a-bit-cruel/32420/67 "2000-09-08T15:41:12Z")
Damn, it’s coming fast and furious. Add me to the list of people that believed this was a somewhat believable story in the beginning, and is now a complete fabrication. It doesn’t make sense. You’re full of it **Freak**. I have said this before and **Anthracite** now seems to agree: From Anthracite- > [@](#): > > This does explain a lot. Thank you for posting it, so I and everyone else can know what you really are. ---
**Author:** ![Pucette](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/278dde/32.png) [@Pucette](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Pucette)\ **Post date:** [September 8, 2000, 3:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/just-a-bit-cruel/32420/68 "2000-09-08T15:43:43Z")
I wasn’t saying you should be submissive. Just don’t go ticking him off. Don’t go out of your way to make your opinions of him visible. Ignore him. What’s the deal with your inference of submission? HUGE difference. ---
**Author:** ![FreakFreely](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/48db29/32.png) [@FreakFreely](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/FreakFreely)\ **Post date:** [September 8, 2000, 3:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/just-a-bit-cruel/32420/69 "2000-09-08T15:44:51Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Coldfire \* > \*\*Dude, you posted your OP 17 hours ago. I find it terribly strange that NOW, after receiving a lot of shit for it, you suddenly add this little extra info. > > “Oh, BTW, I did apologise and she said it wasn’t too bad and guess what, she was a racist bitch just like I thought from the beginning” > > Bullshit. Either you made the entire thing up, or just that last bit. But they did not happen BOTH. \*\* I posted it at 5pm, just before I left work (I don’t have the internet at home anymore). In fact, I left work early hoping I would see her again so I could apologize. I saw her, and I apologized. Then I came to work today, saw your replies, and filled you all in. You’re flyin’ off the handle and making accusations, and now you’re comparing me to Serlin? Fuck you, Coldfire. ---
**Author:** ![Pucette](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/278dde/32.png) [@Pucette](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Pucette)\ **Post date:** [September 8, 2000, 3:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/just-a-bit-cruel/32420/70 "2000-09-08T15:45:02Z")
And incidentally, I don’t buy that last racist line Freak attributed to her. Not very likely. ---
**Author:** ![August\_West](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/august_west/32/18069_2.png) [@August\_West](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/August_West)\ **Post date:** [September 8, 2000, 3:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/just-a-bit-cruel/32420/71 "2000-09-08T15:48:38Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by FreakFreely \* > \*\*until she said “If I had known it was you behind me, I probably wouldn’t have worried. I was afraid it was some cracked out nigger with a knife.” > > \*\* yeah, right. ---
**Author:** ![TracyMarie](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/65b543/32.png) [@TracyMarie](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TracyMarie)\ **Post date:** [September 8, 2000, 3:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/just-a-bit-cruel/32420/72 "2000-09-08T15:52:46Z")
I don’t understand either. You were supposedly staring at her for half an hour on the bus. Ok, if that’s true, why in the world would she think that the guy following her was anyone else? I gathered from your first account that she knew it was you who got off the bus and that’s why she was so afraid. Hmm. This isn’t adding up. My opinion about your behavior? Your subject line is correct. It was cruel. You don’t know this woman. And, Ok, let’s say your assessment of her is right and she is not a nice person. Next time you come across a “not nice” person, just don’t let him/her turn YOU into a “not nice” person. We don’t want to become like those we dislike, right? Peace, Tracy ---
**Author:** ![FreakFreely](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/48db29/32.png) [@FreakFreely](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/FreakFreely)\ **Post date:** [September 8, 2000, 3:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/just-a-bit-cruel/32420/73 "2000-09-08T15:54:35Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by MerrySquirrels \* > \*\*And incidentally, I don’t buy that last racist line Freak attributed to her. Not very likely. \*\* I don’t either. I think she said it as a joke, but I’m not sure. I would think it’d be pretty obvious to her that I was the one following her, but I dunno. ---
**Author:** ![TracyMarie](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/65b543/32.png) [@TracyMarie](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TracyMarie)\ **Post date:** [September 8, 2000, 3:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/just-a-bit-cruel/32420/74 "2000-09-08T15:57:59Z")
> [@](#): > > _Originally posted by FreakFreely \* > \*\* > Eventually we get to the bus stop across from my house, and she gets off. And I follow her. She, of course, can’t help but notice this fact. So I follow her for a block, just close enough behind her so she can hear my footsteps._ Italics mine. But see, this is why I’m confused. She knew it was you. So the racist remark doesn’t make sense. Either she’s lying or you are . . . Peace, Tracy ---
**Author:** ![oldscratch](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/ed655f/32.png) [@oldscratch](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/oldscratch)\ **Post date:** [September 8, 2000, 4:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/just-a-bit-cruel/32420/75 "2000-09-08T16:05:11Z")
You know what Freak. I’m going to accept your story. I don’t know, I’m just feeling accepting. You don’t strike me as the kind of guy who would make something up to take steam off yourself. I think this could all die if you posted an apology, agreed that it was malicious, and stated that in the future you’ll be more considerate of how women see the world. ---
**Author:** ![Coldfire](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/a587f6/32.png) [@Coldfire](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Coldfire)\ **Post date:** [September 8, 2000, 4:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/just-a-bit-cruel/32420/76 "2000-09-08T16:05:18Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by FreakFreely \* > I was actually starting to appreciate the fact that she has a sense of humor and sorta like her even, until she said “If I had known it was you behind me, I probably wouldn’t have worried. I was afraid it was some cracked out nigger with a knife.” > > Apparently my original assessment of her was correct. Go figure. But I still feel guilty. Not one half hour later, this has changed to: > [@](#): > > I think she said it as a joke, but I’m not sure. I would think it’d be pretty obvious to her that I was the one following her, but I dunno. This, together with that which TracyMarie already commented on, simply **does not compute**. Without any more information, we can merely conclude you’re trying to weasel your way out of it. And failing miserably. Sure, you can blame it all on me, screaming “Fuck you, Coldfire!”. Go right ahead. At least I’m not the one who thinks scaring people is some sort of higher level of humour. ---
**Author:** ![FreakFreely](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/48db29/32.png) [@FreakFreely](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/FreakFreely)\ **Post date:** [September 8, 2000, 4:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/just-a-bit-cruel/32420/77 "2000-09-08T16:06:49Z")
Tracy, I don’t understand it any more than you. Obviously, she **must’ve** known it was me, as I said above. It’s possible she was joking, though it seems unlikely since she didn’t laugh. It’s possible she was just trying to make me feel better about it, but that would go against everything I know about her. Unless I was wrong about her, in which case I’d feel even worse than I did before. ---
**Author:** ![FreakFreely](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/48db29/32.png) [@FreakFreely](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/FreakFreely)\ **Post date:** [September 8, 2000, 4:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/just-a-bit-cruel/32420/78 "2000-09-08T16:09:59Z")
Coldfire, enlighten me, how does it not compute? And BTW, I don’t think it was a good thing that I did. I strongly feel that I shouldn’t have done it. If I had the chance to do it over again, I wouldn’t. But that’s 20/20 hindsight for you. ---
**Author:** ![Tymp](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/c5a1d2/32.png) [@Tymp](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tymp)\ **Post date:** [September 8, 2000, 4:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/just-a-bit-cruel/32420/79 "2000-09-08T16:11:49Z")
**MerrySquirrels** , Not expressing emotion for unfounded fear of reprisal is submissive. That said, I must apologize for the “ass” remark – however much it pains me to do so in a Pit thread. ---
**Author:** ![FreakFreely](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/48db29/32.png) [@FreakFreely](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/FreakFreely)\ **Post date:** [September 8, 2000, 4:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/just-a-bit-cruel/32420/80 "2000-09-08T16:12:37Z")
Another BTW, as oldscratch said, I’m not the type to try to weasel out of something. I stick up for what I think, and I always tell people what I think. So there. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/just-a-bit-cruel/32420.md?page=3) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/just-a-bit-cruel/32420.md?page=5)