# Just got job at gay bar. Anything to expect? **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [August 7, 2012, 2:17am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/just-got-job-at-gay-bar-anything-to-expect/630685 "2012-08-07T02:17:54Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![Little\_Nemo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/little_nemo/32/3120_2.png) [@Little\_Nemo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Little_Nemo)\ **Post date:** [August 7, 2012, 5:26am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/just-got-job-at-gay-bar-anything-to-expect/630685/21 "2012-08-07T05:26:54Z")
The fact that this is an upscale metro place probably means the tip will be decent. Especially if people are trying to impress other customers. Remember, personality and service will get you better tips than good looks. I don’t see why the customers being gay should be an issue. You’re serving drinks not soliciting lap dances. Gay people presumably drink just like straight people. Being a bartender with gay customers is no different than being a barber or a car mechanic or a tax accountant with gay customers. ---
**Author:** ![bengangmo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/50afbb/32.png) [@bengangmo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/bengangmo)\ **Post date:** [August 7, 2012, 5:58am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/just-got-job-at-gay-bar-anything-to-expect/630685/22 "2012-08-07T05:58:17Z")
The advice I’d give would be to learn the common cocktails, and how to mix them with your eyes closed. Be friendly, and have fun. ---
**Author:** ![Cinnamon\_Imp](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/58956e/32.png) [@Cinnamon\_Imp](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cinnamon_Imp)\ **Post date:** [August 7, 2012, 8:19am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/just-got-job-at-gay-bar-anything-to-expect/630685/23 "2012-08-07T08:19:58Z")
> [@thelurkinghorror](#): > > Oh, you can also expect to a) be a superstar b) have a war to break out, and c) a _nuclear_ war… I see what you did there 😉 Congrats on the new job OP - I’m sure it’ll be _fabulous_! ---
**Author:** ![Living\_Well\_Is\_Best\_Revenge](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/6bbea6/32.png) [@Living\_Well\_Is\_Best\_Revenge](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Living_Well_Is_Best_Revenge)\ **Post date:** [August 7, 2012, 1:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/just-got-job-at-gay-bar-anything-to-expect/630685/24 "2012-08-07T13:28:53Z")
OP, you are better looking than you think or they probably wouldn’t have hired you. ---
**Author:** ![Gyrate](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/gyrate/32/3588_2.png) [@Gyrate](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gyrate)\ **Post date:** [August 7, 2012, 2:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/just-got-job-at-gay-bar-anything-to-expect/630685/25 "2012-08-07T14:12:04Z")
> [@bengangmo](#): > > The advice I’d give would be to learn the common cocktails, and how to mix them with your eyes closed. > > Be friendly, and have fun. I bartended some years ago (at a private club, not a gay bar). The above advice plus the advice about dealing with messy clothes and wearing comfortable shoes (there’s a lot of standing and walking back and forth involved) are key. It can be a grubby job but with the right attitude and a minimum of asshole customers it can be enjoyable. ---
**Author:** ![bengangmo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/50afbb/32.png) [@bengangmo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/bengangmo)\ **Post date:** [August 7, 2012, 2:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/just-got-job-at-gay-bar-anything-to-expect/630685/26 "2012-08-07T14:21:39Z")
> [@Living\_Well\_Is\_Best\_Revenge](#): > > OP, you are better looking than you think or they probably wouldn’t have hired you. Yeah - given that he has no experience I would second that notion. ---
**Author:** ![FairyChatMom](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/fairychatmom/32/21906_2.png) [@FairyChatMom](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/FairyChatMom)\ **Post date:** [August 7, 2012, 2:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/just-got-job-at-gay-bar-anything-to-expect/630685/27 "2012-08-07T14:25:09Z")
My youngest sis has been a bartender for more than 25 years. She’s not a supermodel, nor is she a toothless hag. But she’s got a real gift for reading people. I’ve watched her at work - she can figure out pretty fast who she can joke around with, who she can “abuse” and who just wants quick service and to be left alone. She’ll dance on the bar or sing along with the band, she’ll “insult” customers, and she flat-out rakes in tips. I figured that was the secret - knowing how to relate to people one-on-one. And I expect that applies no matter what kind of bar you tend. I don’t know how or if one could develop such skills, but I thought I’d add my 2¢. Hope you enjoy you new gig! ---
**Author:** ![YourAdHere](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/y/65b543/32.png) [@YourAdHere](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/YourAdHere)\ **Post date:** [August 7, 2012, 3:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/just-got-job-at-gay-bar-anything-to-expect/630685/28 "2012-08-07T15:49:08Z")
Wow, thank you, you kind people . By parents I meant parents of students I teach. ---
**Author:** ![MeanJoe](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/meanjoe/32/5693_2.png) [@MeanJoe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MeanJoe)\ **Post date:** [August 7, 2012, 6:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/just-got-job-at-gay-bar-anything-to-expect/630685/29 "2012-08-07T18:14:43Z")
You need to learn what the following two words mean and do it: Gay pour. ---
**Author:** ![Nawth\_Chucka](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/c57346/32.png) [@Nawth\_Chucka](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Nawth_Chucka)\ **Post date:** [August 7, 2012, 6:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/just-got-job-at-gay-bar-anything-to-expect/630685/30 "2012-08-07T18:35:20Z")
> [@MeanJoe](#): > > You need to learn what the following two words mean and do it: Gay pour. Would you look at that, a thing that makes no sense. ---
**Author:** ![Little\_Nemo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/little_nemo/32/3120_2.png) [@Little\_Nemo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Little_Nemo)\ **Post date:** [August 7, 2012, 9:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/just-got-job-at-gay-bar-anything-to-expect/630685/31 "2012-08-07T21:20:11Z")
> [@Nawth\_Chucka](#): > > Would you look at that, a thing that makes no sense. Yes, I was thinking gay pour might be a term that had some meaning but I hadn’t heard of, so I did a google search. Nothing. ---
**Author:** ![Inner\_Stickler](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/inner_stickler/32/318_2.png) [@Inner\_Stickler](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Inner_Stickler)\ **Post date:** [August 7, 2012, 9:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/just-got-job-at-gay-bar-anything-to-expect/630685/32 "2012-08-07T21:25:49Z")
Gay pour means making a drink twice as strong. One stereotype of gay bars is that they are heavy on the liquor. ---
**Author:** ![Nawth\_Chucka](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/c57346/32.png) [@Nawth\_Chucka](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Nawth_Chucka)\ **Post date:** [August 7, 2012, 10:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/just-got-job-at-gay-bar-anything-to-expect/630685/33 "2012-08-07T22:20:52Z")
> [@Inner\_Stickler](#): > > Gay pour means making a drink twice as strong. One stereotype of gay bars is that they are heavy on the liquor. I always understood that to be a ‘double’, regardless of who the customer chose to have sex with. ---
**Author:** ![astro](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/9dc877/32.png) [@astro](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/astro)\ **Post date:** [August 8, 2012, 2:29am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/just-got-job-at-gay-bar-anything-to-expect/630685/34 "2012-08-08T02:29:23Z")
> [@YourAdHere](#): > > Just got second job, this one is as a bartender at a “gay/lesbian / metro, etc” bar. Interesting. I always thought one of the aspects of gay bars was that gay men and gay women favored separate bars and did not mix together all that much barwise. ---
**Author:** ![thelurkinghorror](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/7c8e57/32.png) [@thelurkinghorror](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/thelurkinghorror)\ **Post date:** [August 8, 2012, 3:03am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/just-got-job-at-gay-bar-anything-to-expect/630685/35 "2012-08-08T03:03:47Z")
I am not gay\*, but I think that’s generally the case that they’re separate. But, locally we had: 1. Dance clubby mostly men and straight girls at night, quieter in the daytime. 2. Gay men, drag queens, and creepy swingers. Either quiet and divey, or there were parties, but I’ve only seen the former. 3 and 4) are near each other and I think have the same owner. Mostly guys, but there were some lesbians there. These places were pretty chill when I went. ETA: \*heh, the first line should really have, “but not that there’s anything wrong with that!” ---
**Author:** ![clairobscur](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/839c29/32.png) [@clairobscur](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/clairobscur)\ **Post date:** [August 8, 2012, 3:10am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/just-got-job-at-gay-bar-anything-to-expect/630685/36 "2012-08-08T03:10:06Z")
> [@Nawth\_Chucka](#): > > You realize that if those ‘very conservative, very religious, parents’ who don’t like you complain about where you work it’s b/c they saw you there and they’re either not so conservative or they’re busted? Rumors can spread. ---
**Author:** ![Nawth\_Chucka](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/c57346/32.png) [@Nawth\_Chucka](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Nawth_Chucka)\ **Post date:** [August 8, 2012, 3:42am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/just-got-job-at-gay-bar-anything-to-expect/630685/37 "2012-08-08T03:42:50Z")
> [@clairobscur](#): > > Rumors can spread. Both ways even, if one is so inclined. ---
**Author:** ![Little\_Nemo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/little_nemo/32/3120_2.png) [@Little\_Nemo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Little_Nemo)\ **Post date:** [August 8, 2012, 5:10am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/just-got-job-at-gay-bar-anything-to-expect/630685/38 "2012-08-08T05:10:47Z")
> [@astro](#): > > Interesting. I always thought one of the aspects of gay bars was that gay men and gay women favored separate bars and did not mix together all that much barwise. A WAG but I can see lesbians choosing to go to a gay bar because they want to go someplace where they won’t have people hitting on them. ---
**Author:** ![astro](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/9dc877/32.png) [@astro](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/astro)\ **Post date:** [August 8, 2012, 5:42am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/just-got-job-at-gay-bar-anything-to-expect/630685/39 "2012-08-08T05:42:34Z")
> [@Little\_Nemo](#): > > A WAG but I can see lesbians choosing to go to a gay bar because they want to go someplace where they won’t have people hitting on them. I can see that, but I’ve also been under the impression gay man and lesbians generally do not always get along all that well in mixed social interaction environments for a variety of complex reasons. I guess that impression is incorrrect. ---
**Author:** ![Inner\_Stickler](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/inner_stickler/32/318_2.png) [@Inner\_Stickler](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Inner_Stickler)\ **Post date:** [August 8, 2012, 5:45am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/just-got-job-at-gay-bar-anything-to-expect/630685/40 "2012-08-08T05:45:59Z")
> [@Nawth\_Chucka](#): > > I always understood that to be a ‘double’, regardless of who the customer chose to have sex with. Well, it may depend on the bar but if I order a drink and specify double, I expect a drink that’s twice as strong. If I order a gay pour, I expect a drink that’s at least twice as strong. It’s a less finicky but more alcoholic order, as I understand it. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/just-got-job-at-gay-bar-anything-to-expect/630685.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/just-got-job-at-gay-bar-anything-to-expect/630685.md?page=3)