# Just how reprehensible can you be in the Pit? **URL:** \ **Category:** About This Message Board\ **Created:** [November 22, 2019, 4:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/just-how-reprehensible-can-you-be-in-the-pit/843820 "2019-11-22T16:18:40Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![octopus](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/octopus/32/3716_2.png) [@octopus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/octopus)\ **Post date:** [November 22, 2019, 7:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/just-how-reprehensible-can-you-be-in-the-pit/843820/41 "2019-11-22T19:31:52Z")
> [@saucywench](#): > > I think that’s sad that people attack other people’s children under any circumstances. > > I don’t know all the backstories here, and I only read certain threads. I read The Pit, but I don’t think I’ve ever posted there. I’m sure if I have, someone will let me know. I’m making a value judgement on what is right in front of me. What Shodan is doing looks right on par with what Huey did in the post cited by Greyson. And what happened to Huey? He got nailed by a contrived rule for posting practically exclusively in the pit. ---
**Author:** ![GreysonCarlisle](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/a87d85/32.png) [@GreysonCarlisle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/GreysonCarlisle)\ **Post date:** [November 22, 2019, 7:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/just-how-reprehensible-can-you-be-in-the-pit/843820/42 "2019-11-22T19:32:49Z")
> [@Jasmine](#): > > The key thing about the Pit is that you can easily avoid it. Can you, though? You get pitted for X, and posters pile on and reinforce each other that you’re X. Pretty soon, that belief become fact to them, and it carries over into every other part of the board. ---
**Author:** ![saucywench](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/85e7bf/32.png) [@saucywench](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/saucywench)\ **Post date:** [November 22, 2019, 7:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/just-how-reprehensible-can-you-be-in-the-pit/843820/43 "2019-11-22T19:34:10Z")
> [@Jasmine](#): > > The key thing about the Pit is that you can easily avoid it. It’s the one place here where you can have a “knock out drag out”, which means there’s only one place you have to avoid if it’s not your cup of tea. Keep in mind, also, that you can dish it out and not just take it. Just because you can call people cunts, doesn’t mean you have to. ---
**Author:** ![Helena330](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/helena330/32/531_2.png) [@Helena330](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Helena330)\ **Post date:** [November 22, 2019, 7:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/just-how-reprehensible-can-you-be-in-the-pit/843820/44 "2019-11-22T19:36:46Z")
> [@Babale](#): > > Report the posts, and if you don’t hear back, open an ATMB thread to complain if you disagree. Or tell the precious ones to have some self-control and don’t post in the Pit. ---
**Author:** ![Scumpup](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ce73a5/32.png) [@Scumpup](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Scumpup)\ **Post date:** [November 22, 2019, 7:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/just-how-reprehensible-can-you-be-in-the-pit/843820/45 "2019-11-22T19:43:26Z")
If one’s feelings are easily hurt, the Pit is a good place to avoid. If one’s feelings are easily hurt on behalf of others, the Pit is a good place to avoid. ---
**Author:** ![Max\_S](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/46a35a/32.png) [@Max\_S](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Max_S)\ **Post date:** [November 22, 2019, 7:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/just-how-reprehensible-can-you-be-in-the-pit/843820/46 "2019-11-22T19:44:26Z")
> [@Shodan](#): > > Just to add to the “he knows perfectly well I have PTSD” discussion - when I Pitted the poster in question back in 2011, I asked specifically if she suffered from mental issues, and offered to back off if she did. I do not recall receiving any response. > > Regards, > Shodan If you did know about it, that’s over the line. In my opinion, knowingly taunting a person with a mental disorder about spending time in a psych ward violates the rule for harassment. If you have been doing this since 2011, that’s even worse. If you really didn’t know, I wouldn’t recommend sanction. Either way, your first response was not an apology and I’ll never think of you the same way again. Children who roast other children with “yo mama” jokes might be excused to turn defensive when they first learn that the target of the joke has no mother. It’s still reprehensible, but they might be excused, once, for never having learned to apologize. How a grown man responds in the same situation is a strong indication of character. ~Max ---
**Author:** ![Steophan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/steophan/32/9595_2.png) [@Steophan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Steophan)\ **Post date:** [November 22, 2019, 7:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/just-how-reprehensible-can-you-be-in-the-pit/843820/47 "2019-11-22T19:44:34Z")
> [@Shodan](#): > > Would it help if I posted a few of the times I and other posters have accused others of being crazy, paranoid, sexually deviant, stupid, addicted to drugs, etc.? I linked to a poster saying “up your meds”. > > It’s the Pit. “You are out of your mind” ranks up there with “go fuck a cactus”. IOW it is not a specific insult at all - I do that to everybody. In the Pit. > > Regards, > Shodan Yep. No-one stepped up to white knight for me when people have mocked my mental health issues or used homophobic language against me. Not that I’d expect them to, it’s the Pit and that’s what it is there for. In fact, the only thing that bothers me about those attacks, for very specific people, is the hypocrisy involved as they are vocally “woke” and claim to be opposed to such actions. ---
**Author:** ![CarnalK](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/carnalk/32/486_2.png) [@CarnalK](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CarnalK)\ **Post date:** [November 22, 2019, 7:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/just-how-reprehensible-can-you-be-in-the-pit/843820/48 "2019-11-22T19:46:20Z")
> [@Scumpup](#): > > If one’s feelings are easily hurt, the Pit is a good place to avoid. > If one’s feelings are easily hurt on behalf of others, the Pit is a good place to avoid. Everything can be avoided on a message board. You can even just avoid the whole message board. ---
**Author:** ![What\_Exit](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/what_exit/32/10652_2.png) [@What\_Exit](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/What_Exit)\ **Post date:** [November 22, 2019, 7:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/just-how-reprehensible-can-you-be-in-the-pit/843820/49 "2019-11-22T19:49:42Z")
> [@octopus](#): > > He got nailed by a contrived rule for posting practically exclusively in the pit. The first and most important rule on the Straight Dope Message Board is “ **don’t be a jerk** ”. So while you can write contrived, you are wrong. I know you’ve been told this before, the most important rule is “ **don’t be a jerk** ”. One more time just for you: “ **don’t be a jerk** ”. ---
**Author:** ![HurricaneDitka](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/96bed5/32.png) [@HurricaneDitka](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/HurricaneDitka)\ **Post date:** [November 22, 2019, 7:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/just-how-reprehensible-can-you-be-in-the-pit/843820/50 "2019-11-22T19:53:17Z")
Most of the Pit posts would qualify as being “a jerk” by most people’s standards. ETA: It seems completely nonsensical to say that the most important rule on the SDMB is “don’t be a jerk”, but then we’ve set aside a special area where you _can_ be a jerk, and now we’re upset that someone went there and acted like a jerk, while everyone else there were acting like jerks. ---
**Author:** ![Scumpup](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ce73a5/32.png) [@Scumpup](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Scumpup)\ **Post date:** [November 22, 2019, 7:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/just-how-reprehensible-can-you-be-in-the-pit/843820/51 "2019-11-22T19:55:28Z")
> [@HurricaneDitka](#): > > Most of the Pit posts would qualify as being “a jerk” by most people’s standards. +1QFT ---
**Author:** ![octopus](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/octopus/32/3716_2.png) [@octopus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/octopus)\ **Post date:** [November 22, 2019, 8:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/just-how-reprehensible-can-you-be-in-the-pit/843820/52 "2019-11-22T20:04:45Z")
> [@What\_Exit](#): > > The first and most important rule on the Straight Dope Message Board is “ **don’t be a jerk** ”. So while you can write contrived, you are wrong. I know you’ve been told this before, the most important rule is “ **don’t be a jerk** ”. > > One more time just for you: “ **don’t be a jerk** ”. Lol. There is nothing contrived about a direct quote addressing and clarifying this very specific subject and also addressing and clarifying the so-called jerk rules from the administrator and the one who wrote the pit rules. > [@HurricaneDitka](#): > > Most of the Pit posts would qualify as being “a jerk” by most people’s standards. > > ETA: It seems completely nonsensical to say that the most important rule on the SDMB is “don’t be a jerk”, but then we’ve set aside a special area where you _can_ be a jerk, and now we’re upset that someone went there and acted like a jerk, while everyone else there were acting like jerks. Precisely. ---
**Author:** ![Left\_Hand\_of\_Dorkness](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/left_hand_of_dorkness/32/7156_2.png) [@Left\_Hand\_of\_Dorkness](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Left_Hand_of_Dorkness)\ **Post date:** [November 22, 2019, 8:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/just-how-reprehensible-can-you-be-in-the-pit/843820/53 "2019-11-22T20:06:46Z")
> [@octopus](#): > > I revealed I have children on this board. You know how often they’ve been attacked in the Pit? You know how often a mod has said one word about the inappropriateness of said attacks? “I’ve revealed I have a cerebral cortex on this board. Do you know that I’ve been called crazy?” Nope. That’s not an analogy. If someone revealed that they had, for example, a child with severe anxiety who’d struggled in school and often came home crying, and someone responded, “They’re anxious because they’re worried someone will find out what a shitty dad they have. Give your kid up for adoption, yo, and they’ll recover,” then it’s analogous. The problem isn’t just the shitty personal attack. It’s that the attack is made toward a person’s deep vulnerability, and takes advantage of their specific real-world suffering to hurt them further. The pit is for insults, but it’s not for seeking a person’s greatest hurt and using that against them. Edit: also, re: the morgenstern/Chimera debacle, I disagree with the decision not to ban the former. His behavior was beyond the pale. However, mods made it very clear that despite the lack of banning, he was behaving execrably, and that he was on a very short leash. And he left the board, which is the important point. No self-respecting board needs to put up with someone willing to behave in that fashion. ---
**Author:** ![What\_Exit](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/what_exit/32/10652_2.png) [@What\_Exit](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/What_Exit)\ **Post date:** [November 22, 2019, 8:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/just-how-reprehensible-can-you-be-in-the-pit/843820/54 "2019-11-22T20:09:48Z")
If you somehow haven’t figured it out yet, Being a Jerk is in the eyes of the moderators. It is at their discretion. They aren’t dumb enough to make hard & fast rules (most of time, there has been some notable exceptions in the past). Also moderating shouldn’t be a post at a time in isolation but about a body of work. So most of us have learned that if you want to keep posting here, “Don’t be a jerk”. ---
**Author:** ![Left\_Hand\_of\_Dorkness](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/left_hand_of_dorkness/32/7156_2.png) [@Left\_Hand\_of\_Dorkness](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Left_Hand_of_Dorkness)\ **Post date:** [November 22, 2019, 8:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/just-how-reprehensible-can-you-be-in-the-pit/843820/55 "2019-11-22T20:11:26Z")
> [@Beckdawrek](#): > > I don’t think an apology would help. Anyone can type 'I’m sorry" > Punishment is necessary here. > IMHO Yeah, an apology isn’t the consequence. It’s just what a decent person does if they unintentionally kick a person in the gonads. ---
**Author:** ![octopus](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/octopus/32/3716_2.png) [@octopus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/octopus)\ **Post date:** [November 22, 2019, 8:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/just-how-reprehensible-can-you-be-in-the-pit/843820/56 "2019-11-22T20:11:27Z")
> [@What\_Exit](#): > > If you somehow haven’t figured it out yet, Being a Jerk is in the eyes of the moderators. It is at their discretion. They aren’t dumb enough to make hard & fast rules (most of time, there has been some notable exceptions in the past). Also moderating shouldn’t be a post at a time in isolation but about a body of work. So most of us have learned that if you want to keep posting here, “Don’t be a jerk”. So what are the pages and pages of rules then? ---
**Author:** ![The\_Librarian](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/the_librarian/32/402_2.png) [@The\_Librarian](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_Librarian)\ **Post date:** [November 22, 2019, 8:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/just-how-reprehensible-can-you-be-in-the-pit/843820/57 "2019-11-22T20:13:23Z")
Welcome to the play of our performance art group: “Under the Bridge” ---
**Author:** ![octopus](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/octopus/32/3716_2.png) [@octopus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/octopus)\ **Post date:** [November 22, 2019, 8:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/just-how-reprehensible-can-you-be-in-the-pit/843820/58 "2019-11-22T20:14:14Z")
> [@Left\_Hand\_of\_Dorkness](#): > > “I’ve revealed I have a cerebral cortex on this board. Do you know that I’ve been called crazy?” > > Nope. That’s not an analogy. > > If someone revealed that they had, for example, a child with severe anxiety who’d struggled in school and often came home crying, and someone responded, “They’re anxious because they’re worried someone will find out what a shitty dad they have. Give your kid up for adoption, yo, and they’ll recover,” then it’s analogous. > > The problem isn’t just the shitty personal attack. It’s that the attack is made toward a person’s deep vulnerability, and takes advantage of their specific real-world suffering to hurt them further. > > The pit is for insults, but it’s not for seeking a person’s greatest hurt and using that against them. > > Edit: also, re: the morgenstern/Chimera debacle, I disagree with the decision not to ban the former. His behavior was beyond the pale. However, mods made it very clear that despite the lack of banning, he was behaving execrably, and that he was on a very short leash. And he left the board, which is the important point. No self-respecting board needs to put up with someone willing to behave in that fashion. That’s fine and dandy. But it was explicitly stated that that behavior was not against the rules. Now, if you want to argue the rules or board structure should be changed, that’s a different story than contriving a sanction against someone who is following what was explicitly allowed. ---
**Author:** ![What\_Exit](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/what_exit/32/10652_2.png) [@What\_Exit](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/What_Exit)\ **Post date:** [November 22, 2019, 8:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/just-how-reprehensible-can-you-be-in-the-pit/843820/59 "2019-11-22T20:16:12Z")
> [@octopus](#): > > So what are the pages and pages of rules then? Maybe to entertain people like you. ---
**Author:** ![steatopygia](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/steatopygia/32/3132_2.png) [@steatopygia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/steatopygia)\ **Post date:** [November 22, 2019, 8:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/just-how-reprehensible-can-you-be-in-the-pit/843820/60 "2019-11-22T20:16:35Z")
**Shodan** did come back to the thread after being called out. That’s something. His defense of his drive-by sucked. He is smart enough to know that. Personally, I think a full and sincere apology is the only thing that would make this not bannable. I have NEVER before thought we should ban regular posters for insults. This was inexcusable. **Shodan** was an asshole to someone who has issues that are a direct result of serving her country, something conservatives claim to revere. If he is banned, he deserved it. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/just-how-reprehensible-can-you-be-in-the-pit/843820.md?page=2) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/just-how-reprehensible-can-you-be-in-the-pit/843820.md?page=4)