# Just punchlines **URL:** \ **Category:** Thread Games\ **Created:** [January 13, 2017, 2:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/just-punchlines/777035 "2017-01-13T14:16:32Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 13
**Author:** ![burpo\_the\_wonder\_mutt](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/burpo_the_wonder_mutt/32/365_2.png) [@burpo\_the\_wonder\_mutt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/burpo_the_wonder_mutt)\ **Post date:** [April 14, 2017, 2:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/just-punchlines/777035/241 "2017-04-14T14:25:46Z")
The Panama canal is a busy ditch. ---
**Author:** ![Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/7cd45c/32.png) [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elendil_s_Heir)\ **Post date:** [April 14, 2017, 3:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/just-punchlines/777035/242 "2017-04-14T15:04:21Z")
:: sigh :: Lemme see that fucking map again. ---
**Author:** ![buddha\_david](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/ee7513/32.png) [@buddha\_david](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/buddha_david)\ **Post date:** [April 14, 2017, 7:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/just-punchlines/777035/243 "2017-04-14T19:19:33Z")
“Mommy, is Michael Jackson God?” ---
**Author:** ![Dendarii\_Dame](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/bbce88/32.png) [@Dendarii\_Dame](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dendarii_Dame)\ **Post date:** [April 16, 2017, 5:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/just-punchlines/777035/244 "2017-04-16T17:58:20Z")
With nail scissors? ---
**Author:** ![JRDelirious](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jrdelirious/32/9531_2.png) [@JRDelirious](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/JRDelirious)\ **Post date:** [April 17, 2017, 12:11am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/just-punchlines/777035/245 "2017-04-17T00:11:17Z")
“Move aside, girls, I have to gargle.” ---
**Author:** ![Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/7cd45c/32.png) [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elendil_s_Heir)\ **Post date:** [April 17, 2017, 2:46am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/just-punchlines/777035/246 "2017-04-17T02:46:38Z")
“I don’t know where ye’ve been, lad, but I see ye won first prize!” ---
**Author:** ![Cardigan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cardigan/32/187_2.png) [@Cardigan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cardigan)\ **Post date:** [April 17, 2017, 12:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/just-punchlines/777035/247 "2017-04-17T12:08:26Z")
To hold their pants up, silly ---
**Author:** ![Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/7cd45c/32.png) [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elendil_s_Heir)\ **Post date:** [April 17, 2017, 4:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/just-punchlines/777035/248 "2017-04-17T16:41:47Z")
You can’t know, man! You weren’t there! ---
**Author:** ![buddha\_david](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/ee7513/32.png) [@buddha\_david](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/buddha_david)\ **Post date:** [April 17, 2017, 5:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/just-punchlines/777035/249 "2017-04-17T17:03:39Z")
…but the light bulb has to _want_ to change. ---
**Author:** ![Cardigan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cardigan/32/187_2.png) [@Cardigan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cardigan)\ **Post date:** [April 17, 2017, 5:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/just-punchlines/777035/250 "2017-04-17T17:12:15Z")
No, but I enjoyed eating some delicious warm buttery popcorn someone had left on the stairs. ---
**Author:** ![saucywench](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/85e7bf/32.png) [@saucywench](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/saucywench)\ **Post date:** [June 1, 2017, 5:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/just-punchlines/777035/251 "2017-06-01T17:24:05Z")
Because Oklahoma sucks. ---
**Author:** ![Little\_Nemo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/little_nemo/32/3120_2.png) [@Little\_Nemo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Little_Nemo)\ **Post date:** [June 1, 2017, 9:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/just-punchlines/777035/252 "2017-06-01T21:41:48Z")
So the devil told the blonde she could leave. ---
**Author:** ![Aspenglow](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/aspenglow/32/76_2.png) [@Aspenglow](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Aspenglow)\ **Post date:** [June 1, 2017, 9:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/just-punchlines/777035/253 "2017-06-01T21:54:54Z")
“Then why do you care?” replied the doctor. ---
**Author:** ![carnut](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/carnut/32/3531_2.png) [@carnut](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/carnut)\ **Post date:** [June 2, 2017, 3:56am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/just-punchlines/777035/254 "2017-06-02T03:56:16Z")
To protect Canada from Iowans. ---
**Author:** ![Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/7cd45c/32.png) [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elendil_s_Heir)\ **Post date:** [June 2, 2017, 4:04am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/just-punchlines/777035/255 "2017-06-02T04:04:59Z")
“I can see your house from up here!” ---
**Author:** ![Cardigan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cardigan/32/187_2.png) [@Cardigan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cardigan)\ **Post date:** [June 2, 2017, 5:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/just-punchlines/777035/256 "2017-06-02T17:39:53Z")
“she burned it answering the iron.” ---
**Author:** ![Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/7cd45c/32.png) [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elendil_s_Heir)\ **Post date:** [June 12, 2017, 2:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/just-punchlines/777035/257 "2017-06-12T14:29:53Z")
I was standing out in the middle of Utah going like this. ---
**Author:** ![Brooky](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/35a633/32.png) [@Brooky](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Brooky)\ **Post date:** [June 23, 2017, 3:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/just-punchlines/777035/258 "2017-06-23T15:30:23Z")
They can’t find the #11. ---
**Author:** ![buddha\_david](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/ee7513/32.png) [@buddha\_david](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/buddha_david)\ **Post date:** [June 23, 2017, 4:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/just-punchlines/777035/259 "2017-06-23T16:15:45Z")
He was charged with transporting young gulls across sedate lions for immortal porpoises. ---
**Author:** ![Peter\_Morris](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/peter_morris/32/359_2.png) [@Peter\_Morris](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Peter_Morris)\ **Post date:** [June 27, 2017, 2:03am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/just-punchlines/777035/260 "2017-06-27T02:03:48Z")
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