# Just punchlines **URL:** \ **Category:** Thread Games\ **Created:** [January 13, 2017, 2:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/just-punchlines/777035 "2017-01-13T14:16:32Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 17
**Author:** ![Find\_Friends](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/c37758/32.png) [@Find\_Friends](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Find_Friends)\ **Post date:** [September 4, 2017, 7:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/just-punchlines/777035/321 "2017-09-04T19:49:18Z")
Well, I can give you two reasons why you SHOULD go: First, you’re 37 years old! Second, you’re the PRINCIPAL!!! ---
**Author:** ![Cardigan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cardigan/32/187_2.png) [@Cardigan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cardigan)\ **Post date:** [September 5, 2017, 12:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/just-punchlines/777035/322 "2017-09-05T12:01:14Z")
Are you kidding, I’m telling everyone! ---
**Author:** ![Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/7cd45c/32.png) [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elendil_s_Heir)\ **Post date:** [September 6, 2017, 2:34am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/just-punchlines/777035/323 "2017-09-06T02:34:55Z")
Last week a lady called me from Germany and told me to cut it out. ---
**Author:** ![burpo\_the\_wonder\_mutt](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/burpo_the_wonder_mutt/32/365_2.png) [@burpo\_the\_wonder\_mutt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/burpo_the_wonder_mutt)\ **Post date:** [September 6, 2017, 4:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/just-punchlines/777035/324 "2017-09-06T16:09:52Z")
“We have a suggestion box.” ---
**Author:** ![Find\_Friends](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/c37758/32.png) [@Find\_Friends](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Find_Friends)\ **Post date:** [September 6, 2017, 10:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/just-punchlines/777035/325 "2017-09-06T22:33:38Z")
Funny you should mention it… ---
**Author:** ![eschereal](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/eschereal/32/18939_2.png) [@eschereal](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/eschereal)\ **Post date:** [September 7, 2017, 2:07am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/just-punchlines/777035/326 "2017-09-07T02:07:03Z")
So I asked him, “Can I have your shoes?” ---
**Author:** ![Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/7cd45c/32.png) [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elendil_s_Heir)\ **Post date:** [September 7, 2017, 3:47am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/just-punchlines/777035/327 "2017-09-07T03:47:44Z")
Perhaps you’ve seen them on beaches around the world. ---
**Author:** ![Find\_Friends](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/c37758/32.png) [@Find\_Friends](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Find_Friends)\ **Post date:** [September 7, 2017, 10:57am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/just-punchlines/777035/328 "2017-09-07T10:57:57Z")
The letter, which she held in her hand, was of course unsigned, without return address, and merely said: PIZZA PIZZA PIZZA PIZZA - One with a sausage and two little meatballs! :eek: ---
**Author:** ![buddha\_david](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/ee7513/32.png) [@buddha\_david](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/buddha_david)\ **Post date:** [September 7, 2017, 11:57am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/just-punchlines/777035/329 "2017-09-07T11:57:32Z")
Escalator Temporarily Stairs. Sorry for the convenience. ---
**Author:** ![Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/7cd45c/32.png) [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elendil_s_Heir)\ **Post date:** [September 7, 2017, 2:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/just-punchlines/777035/330 "2017-09-07T14:27:56Z")
Because there are twenty of them. ---
**Author:** ![Find\_Friends](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/c37758/32.png) [@Find\_Friends](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Find_Friends)\ **Post date:** [September 8, 2017, 12:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/just-punchlines/777035/331 "2017-09-08T12:48:18Z")
:mad: Forget it, lady! I could never take another 67 of those! ---
**Author:** ![Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/7cd45c/32.png) [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elendil_s_Heir)\ **Post date:** [September 9, 2017, 4:03am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/just-punchlines/777035/332 "2017-09-09T04:03:37Z")
I guess she didn’t like what she’d written. ---
**Author:** ![Find\_Friends](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/c37758/32.png) [@Find\_Friends](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Find_Friends)\ **Post date:** [September 9, 2017, 4:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/just-punchlines/777035/333 "2017-09-09T16:24:05Z")
Yes, ma’am, akshully I has. - Jus’ not big enough enough to crawl back intuh! ---
**Author:** ![Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/7cd45c/32.png) [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elendil_s_Heir)\ **Post date:** [September 10, 2017, 1:54am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/just-punchlines/777035/334 "2017-09-10T01:54:11Z")
I thought you might wanna open your bottle o’ beer! ---
**Author:** ![Peter\_Morris](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/peter_morris/32/359_2.png) [@Peter\_Morris](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Peter_Morris)\ **Post date:** [September 11, 2017, 5:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/just-punchlines/777035/335 "2017-09-11T17:27:09Z")
With enemas like this, who needs fiends? ---
**Author:** ![Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/7cd45c/32.png) [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elendil_s_Heir)\ **Post date:** [September 11, 2017, 8:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/just-punchlines/777035/336 "2017-09-11T20:06:38Z")
All right, I give up. Where’s the boat? ---
**Author:** ![Find\_Friends](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/c37758/32.png) [@Find\_Friends](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Find_Friends)\ **Post date:** [September 11, 2017, 9:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/just-punchlines/777035/337 "2017-09-11T21:11:28Z")
As of las’ night, my father is yo’ father! ---
**Author:** ![jtur88](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/e9c0ed/32.png) [@jtur88](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jtur88)\ **Post date:** [September 11, 2017, 10:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/just-punchlines/777035/338 "2017-09-11T22:33:31Z")
Too early in the morning. I thought that said “Just porcupines” and I thought, Finally an interesting topic. ---
**Author:** ![buddha\_david](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/ee7513/32.png) [@buddha\_david](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/buddha_david)\ **Post date:** [September 12, 2017, 12:50am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/just-punchlines/777035/339 "2017-09-12T00:50:12Z")
Save you? What do you mean, save you? I sent you a horse, a boat, a helicopter… ---
**Author:** ![Cardigan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cardigan/32/187_2.png) [@Cardigan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cardigan)\ **Post date:** [September 12, 2017, 11:53am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/just-punchlines/777035/340 "2017-09-12T11:53:17Z")
I DO work out religiously—Christmas and Easter [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/just-punchlines/777035.md?page=16) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/just-punchlines/777035.md?page=18)