# Just saw an article on the NYT about a man who was arrested for assaulting a federal officer in WDC. . .with his Subway sandwich **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [August 14, 2025, 3:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/just-saw-an-article-on-the-nyt-about-a-man-who-was-arrested-for-assaulting-a-federal-officer-in-wdc-with-his-subway-sandwich/1022043 "2025-08-14T15:49:56Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 10\ **Page:** 7
**Author:** ![Thing.Fish](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/thing.fish/32/9168_2.png) [@Thing.Fish](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Thing.Fish)\ **Post date:** [November 6, 2025, 9:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/just-saw-an-article-on-the-nyt-about-a-man-who-was-arrested-for-assaulting-a-federal-officer-in-wdc-with-his-subway-sandwich/1022043/121 "2025-11-06T21:21:21Z")
Wow, that’s one for Throwback Thursday. Significant differences would be that Guerrero threw eggs, which actually did at least some damage to his victim’s clothing; his victim wasn’t some random stormtrooper but a US Congressman and Presidential candidate (John Anderson); and, probably most importantly, the jury pool didn’t despise his victim. ---
**Author:** ![F.U.Shakespeare](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/aca169/32.png) [@F.U.Shakespeare](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/F.U.Shakespeare)\ **Post date:** [November 6, 2025, 9:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/just-saw-an-article-on-the-nyt-about-a-man-who-was-arrested-for-assaulting-a-federal-officer-in-wdc-with-his-subway-sandwich/1022043/122 "2025-11-06T21:26:42Z")
Well, you’re assuming a ‘Single Sandwich Theory’. ---
**Author:** ![rocking\_chair](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/rocking_chair/32/2918_2.png) [@rocking\_chair](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/rocking_chair)\ **Post date:** [November 6, 2025, 9:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/just-saw-an-article-on-the-nyt-about-a-man-who-was-arrested-for-assaulting-a-federal-officer-in-wdc-with-his-subway-sandwich/1022043/123 "2025-11-06T21:26:42Z")
the closing arguments are some of the funniest things i’ve read. [Man who threw sandwich at federal agent in D.C. found not guilty of misdemeanor after trial - CBS News](https://www.cbsnews.com/news/sean-dunn-dc-sandwich-thrower-trial-verdict/) from the above: the defence: “Think about where the sandwich landed,” Schroff said, arguing that Lairmore’s bulletproof vest that Dunn threw the sub at was “definitely going to keep you safe from a sandwich,” if it protects against gunfire. “A footlong from Subway could not and certainly did not inflict bodily harm,” Schroff said. the prosecution: They said Dunn had the right to express his anger at the federal agents, but he did not have the right to strike them, “even with a sandwich.” “Here we have the defendant, throwing a sandwich, but he’s throwing it hard,” the prosecutor said. “That meets the definition of force.” how this took over 7 hours of deliberation… that is a great mystery. ---
**Author:** ![Saint\_Cad](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/saint_cad/32/18907_2.png) [@Saint\_Cad](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Saint_Cad)\ **Post date:** [November 6, 2025, 9:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/just-saw-an-article-on-the-nyt-about-a-man-who-was-arrested-for-assaulting-a-federal-officer-in-wdc-with-his-subway-sandwich/1022043/124 "2025-11-06T21:59:19Z")
> [@rocking\_chair](#): > > how this took over 7 hours of deliberation… that is a great mystery. Because if I throw water at you and you get wet, it’s assault. So I bet they spent 7 hours on how to make this assault a “it’s not really assault”. Or maybe a few held out and said yes it is legally assault and had to be convinced otherwise. ---
**Author:** ![Chefguy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/chefguy/32/138_2.png) [@Chefguy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chefguy)\ **Post date:** [November 6, 2025, 10:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/just-saw-an-article-on-the-nyt-about-a-man-who-was-arrested-for-assaulting-a-federal-officer-in-wdc-with-his-subway-sandwich/1022043/125 "2025-11-06T22:01:20Z")
> [@Saint\_Cad](#): > > Because if I throw water at you and you get wet, it’s assault. Or it at least throws a damper on things. ---
**Author:** ![Just\_Asking\_Questions](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/ba9def/32.png) [@Just\_Asking\_Questions](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Just_Asking_Questions)\ **Post date:** [November 6, 2025, 10:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/just-saw-an-article-on-the-nyt-about-a-man-who-was-arrested-for-assaulting-a-federal-officer-in-wdc-with-his-subway-sandwich/1022043/126 "2025-11-06T22:20:34Z")
> [@rocking\_chair](#): > > how this took over 7 hours of deliberation… that is a great mystery. Because they wanted lunch for their troubles. Sub sandwiches. ---
**Author:** ![Smapti](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/smapti/32/17938_2.png) [@Smapti](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Smapti)\ **Post date:** [November 6, 2025, 11:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/just-saw-an-article-on-the-nyt-about-a-man-who-was-arrested-for-assaulting-a-federal-officer-in-wdc-with-his-subway-sandwich/1022043/127 "2025-11-06T23:05:15Z")
> [@rocking\_chair](#): > > They said Dunn had the right to express his anger at the federal agents, but he did not have the right to strike them, “even with a sandwich.” What about soup for his family? ---
**Author:** ![Dewey\_Finn](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dewey_finn/32/4222_2.png) [@Dewey\_Finn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dewey_Finn)\ **Post date:** [November 7, 2025, 12:36am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/just-saw-an-article-on-the-nyt-about-a-man-who-was-arrested-for-assaulting-a-federal-officer-in-wdc-with-his-subway-sandwich/1022043/128 "2025-11-07T00:36:06Z")
> [@rocking\_chair](#): > > “A footlong from Subway could not and certainly did not inflict bodily harm,” Schroff said. Well, a Subway sandwich could cause harm, if you _ate_ it. ---
**Author:** ![ASL\_v2.0](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/asl_v2.0/32/3525_2.png) [@ASL\_v2.0](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ASL_v2.0)\ **Post date:** [November 7, 2025, 12:55am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/just-saw-an-article-on-the-nyt-about-a-man-who-was-arrested-for-assaulting-a-federal-officer-in-wdc-with-his-subway-sandwich/1022043/129 "2025-11-07T00:55:27Z")
> [@rocking\_chair](#): > > the prosecution: > > They said Dunn had the right to express his anger at the federal agents, but he did not have the right to strike them, “even with a sandwich.” > > “Here we have the defendant, throwing a sandwich, but he’s throwing it hard,” the prosecutor said. “That meets the definition of force.” > > how this took over 7 hours of deliberation… that is a great mystery. I hope next time someone throws a hotdog. So that the defense and the prosecution can argue over whether a hotdog is legally a sandwich (guaranteed acquittal) or not (as a matter of first impression, it could go either way). ---
**Author:** ![Jackmannii](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jackmannii/32/311_2.png) [@Jackmannii](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jackmannii)\ **Post date:** [November 7, 2025, 1:02am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/just-saw-an-article-on-the-nyt-about-a-man-who-was-arrested-for-assaulting-a-federal-officer-in-wdc-with-his-subway-sandwich/1022043/130 "2025-11-07T01:02:04Z")
> [@](#): > > “A footlong from Subway could not and certainly did not inflict bodily harm,” Schroff said. If it had been a lobbed six-incher, this case would never have gotten to trial. Especially if it was all-veggie. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/just-saw-an-article-on-the-nyt-about-a-man-who-was-arrested-for-assaulting-a-federal-officer-in-wdc-with-his-subway-sandwich/1022043.md?page=6)