# Kanicbird. Yeah, It's probably pointless, but.. **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [January 30, 2009, 2:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/kanicbird-yeah-its-probably-pointless-but/483711 "2009-01-30T14:37:55Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 10
**Author:** ![Revenant\_Threshold](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/f1d935/32.png) [@Revenant\_Threshold](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Revenant_Threshold)\ **Post date:** [February 5, 2009, 9:04am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/kanicbird-yeah-its-probably-pointless-but/483711/181 "2009-02-05T09:04:11Z")
> [@Skald\_the\_Rhymer](#): > > Which is not to say that, if God existed, S/he is responsible for everything that occurs. I can easily postulate a deity who creates a world with free-willed creatures, who then deliberately limist His/Her omnipotence declaring that the choices free beings make will be forever independent of His/Her will. But such a being is (by definition) no longer omniscient either (on purpose, of course). Well, such a being would be essentially in the same responsibility “place” as parents, who generally seem to have some measure of responsibility for what they do. But my point more is that omniscience (or even omnipotence) aren’t in and of themselves controls on free will. > [@](#): > > Anyway, I was really aiming the question at **kanicbird** , whose position seems to lead inevitably to God deliberately and consciously condemning untold billions of souls to eternal torment. That on the other hand would seem to follow through. ---
**Author:** ![monavis](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/e0b2c6/32.png) [@monavis](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/monavis)\ **Post date:** [February 5, 2009, 11:55am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/kanicbird-yeah-its-probably-pointless-but/483711/182 "2009-02-05T11:55:32Z")
> [@Cervaise](#): > > Battered women can rationalize a lot. I doubt if any battered woman would go to her friend or cousin and rejoice at what had been done to her, she may keep it quiet or try to hide it but “rejoice” hardly! ---
**Author:** ![kanicbird](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/5f8ce5/32.png) [@kanicbird](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kanicbird)\ **Post date:** [February 5, 2009, 2:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/kanicbird-yeah-its-probably-pointless-but/483711/183 "2009-02-05T14:44:28Z")
> [@monavis](#): > > Boy,that must have been some big fish…it still doesn’t answer the question of how Jonah held his breath for 3 days. My understanding is Jonah died, existed in the pit (Sheol). When you die you don’t need to breath as you can’t die, but it is very unpleasant. > [@](#): > > If this is allegory then so is a lot of other stories such as the earth being covered with 29,000 feet of water at Noah’s flood. > > The bibles I read said whale. It’s not a allegory, nor is the flood, we just don’t understand the world that we live in, science has mislead us further from what the world really is. As for your bibles saying whale instead of fish, as long as the translation is a honest attempt to translate God’s Word my understanding is it’s all good. ---
**Author:** ![What\_Exit](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/what_exit/32/10652_2.png) [@What\_Exit](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/What_Exit)\ **Post date:** [February 5, 2009, 2:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/kanicbird-yeah-its-probably-pointless-but/483711/184 "2009-02-05T14:57:02Z")
> [@kanicbird](#): > > My understanding is Jonah died, existed in the pit (Sheol). When you die you don’t need to breath as you can’t die, but it is very unpleasant. > > It’s not a allegory, nor is the flood, we just don’t understand the world that we live in, **science has mislead us further from what the world really is.** > > As for your bibles saying whale instead of fish, as long as the translation is a honest attempt to translate God’s Word my understanding is it’s all good. **My Bolding in the quote** Ah, there is the complete craziness I have come to expect from Kanicbird. Really? Science has misled us? What other crazy things do you believe? Is the Earth the center of the Universe? Is the Earth only 6000 years old? What is your list of odd beliefs that are contradicted by science and history? ---
**Author:** ![kanicbird](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/5f8ce5/32.png) [@kanicbird](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kanicbird)\ **Post date:** [February 5, 2009, 3:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/kanicbird-yeah-its-probably-pointless-but/483711/185 "2009-02-05T15:02:47Z")
> [@Revenant\_Threshold](#): > > . Out of interest, could I ask for examples of what you’d consider mistakes? You’ve always seemed to me to be a very certain person, so i’d be interested to know what such mistakes were and how they were able to come about. Once while I was going through a life trial I thought God was telling me to stay home for 3 days, close all the blinds, live in darkness, don’t contact anyone. A take on being in the grave for 3 days. After a short time after closing all the blinds I got the message that it’s going to be a lot longer and I would have to live off my stored provisions. At that point I realized it contradicted the Word of God as God will provide for His people after which I repented of it. As for my certainty, it goes to only what is in the Word, if a person, including myself, says something that contradicts the Word I know for certain it is wrong. As for what is right, I put forth my understanding of scriptures from how the Holy Spirit has instructed me. > [@](#): > > What characterises submission to someone, in general, and would this be grounds for God to impregnate her even if she had disagreed? What if she hadn’t been a believer? You don’t need to control to know what will occur. For someone with access to knowledge of what will happen in the future, it could be known what decisions people will make, whilst still keeping free will entirely intact. Simply knowing what will happen doesn’t make someone responsible for it. The act of submission is complex and involves gender issues. We are called to be a living sacrifice to God, giving our entire body to His service as He sees fit. Men are called to offer up their lives to God while women are called to offer up their bodies to life for God. As such the act of submission to God would include this for a woman. ---
**Author:** ![kanicbird](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/5f8ce5/32.png) [@kanicbird](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kanicbird)\ **Post date:** [February 5, 2009, 3:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/kanicbird-yeah-its-probably-pointless-but/483711/186 "2009-02-05T15:11:10Z")
> [@monavis](#): > > You really believe the Devil has children? Yes: [QUOTE=1 John 3:10] This is how we know who the children of God are and who the children of the devil are: Anyone who does not do what is right is not a child of God; nor is anyone who does not love his brother. [/QUOTE] > [@](#): > > Why in Heaven’s name would a good, great being, allow such things. I am sorry but it sure sounds unreasonable to me. Why are you so obsessed with evil? Isn’t Satan the personification of evil? Satan is the head of the kingdom of death/darkness, he rebelled against God to try to glorify himself, by trying to get followers. God allows this, just as we can go our own way and try to glorify ourselves (note God considers Himself God, but also demons and man as ‘gods’). Acknowledging the truth of Satan’s existence is not the same with being obsessed with evil. ---
**Author:** ![Cervaise](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cervaise/32/16693_2.png) [@Cervaise](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cervaise)\ **Post date:** [February 5, 2009, 3:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/kanicbird-yeah-its-probably-pointless-but/483711/187 "2009-02-05T15:31:12Z")
> [@monavis](#): > > I doubt if any battered woman would go to her friend or cousin and rejoice at what had been done to her, she may keep it quiet or try to hide it but “rejoice” hardly! [Maybe she could sing about it](http://mog.com/shinsaholic/blog/102626). ---
**Author:** ![Critical1](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/3e96dc/32.png) [@Critical1](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Critical1)\ **Post date:** [February 5, 2009, 4:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/kanicbird-yeah-its-probably-pointless-but/483711/188 "2009-02-05T16:28:21Z")
I have met strung out rail thin twitchy crackheads with more ability to string together a sentence. thats all I have to add to this thread ---
**Author:** ![E-Sabbath](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/e19adc/32.png) [@E-Sabbath](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/E-Sabbath)\ **Post date:** [February 5, 2009, 5:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/kanicbird-yeah-its-probably-pointless-but/483711/189 "2009-02-05T17:46:53Z")
> [@kanicbird](#): > > Once while I was going through a life trial I thought God was telling me to stay home for 3 days, close all the blinds, live in darkness, don’t contact anyone. A take on being in the grave for 3 days. After a short time after closing all the blinds I got the message that it’s going to be a lot longer and I would have to live off my stored provisions. At that point I realized it contradicted the Word of God as God will provide for His people after which I repented of it. kanicbird, can you tell me a little more about this… message? I’m a little concerned here. Do you get these messages often? How do they come to you? ---
**Author:** ![Jack\_Batty](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jack_batty/32/3201_2.png) [@Jack\_Batty](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jack_Batty)\ **Post date:** [February 5, 2009, 6:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/kanicbird-yeah-its-probably-pointless-but/483711/190 "2009-02-05T18:07:03Z")
And do they ever tell you to track down members of message boards and cut off their heads? Answer me first. ---
**Author:** ![Really\_Not\_All\_That\_Bright](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/e8c25b/32.png) [@Really\_Not\_All\_That\_Bright](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Really_Not_All_That_Bright)\ **Post date:** [February 5, 2009, 6:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/kanicbird-yeah-its-probably-pointless-but/483711/191 "2009-02-05T18:37:28Z")
> [@Jack\_Batty](#): > > And do they ever tell you to track down members of message boards and cut off their heads? > > Answer me first. Ultimate “need answer fast”. ---
**Author:** ![Guinastasia](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/guinastasia/32/5751_2.png) [@Guinastasia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Guinastasia)\ **Post date:** [February 5, 2009, 7:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/kanicbird-yeah-its-probably-pointless-but/483711/192 "2009-02-05T19:01:24Z")
> [@monavis](#): > > According to the New Testement Mary did say,“Be it done unto me according to your word”. Which some suggest was her consent. > > How ever if that really happened then the child she concieved was only half human and had no Human Male hormones,unless God stuck some in,then Jesus would be all human. > > Very difficult to swallow! Swallowing wouldn’t allow for conception, though. Guys, I would watch making TOO much fun of **Kanicbird**. Not that I don’t agree with you, but that he’ll only end up taking it as a sign of his persecution, and only make it worse. **Kanicbird** , I WILL say to you, that you’re only making Christianity look worse. I don’t think Jesus meant people to act like nutjobs. ---
**Author:** ![kanicbird](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/5f8ce5/32.png) [@kanicbird](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kanicbird)\ **Post date:** [February 5, 2009, 7:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/kanicbird-yeah-its-probably-pointless-but/483711/193 "2009-02-05T19:57:04Z")
> [@E-Sabbath](#): > > kanicbird, can you tell me a little more about this… message? I’m a little concerned here. Do you get these messages often? How do they come to you? This happened at a time of my life when I knew I was going through a ‘time of distress like no other and never again to be repeated’. This was just one aspect of the trial, I was living a chapter of Job, which I was told I would. Looking back the way I got this message was the wrong way, it is the Lord who speaks to us when He wants, I sort of forced a answer and that’s not how it works as He is Lord and I have no right to demand a answer, which I did. Though I did get a message not of him and did make a error, it is OK, as it may lead to distress, but he will always cover our mistakes if we are trying our best to follow Him with our hearts. In general, if not all the time, the messages and experiences that God puts me through matches scripture and He points out that scripture. I was in such distress that staying home for 3 days seemed like a easy way out. Messages come through visions, dreams, prophetic messages, through the Word and prayer, which is 2 way conversation with God. I have never counted how often, but daily is a idea. This is the relationship that God wants with His children and available to anyone who seeks Him IMHO. ---
**Author:** ![kanicbird](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/5f8ce5/32.png) [@kanicbird](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kanicbird)\ **Post date:** [February 5, 2009, 7:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/kanicbird-yeah-its-probably-pointless-but/483711/194 "2009-02-05T19:59:06Z")
> [@Guinastasia](#): > > **Kanicbird** , I WILL say to you, that you’re only making Christianity look worse. I don’t think Jesus meant people to act like nutjobs. The Word disagrees: [QUOTE=John 10:20] Many of them said, “He is demon-possessed and raving mad. Why listen to him?” [/QUOTE] ---
**Author:** ![Omegaman](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/e480ec/32.png) [@Omegaman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Omegaman)\ **Post date:** [February 5, 2009, 8:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/kanicbird-yeah-its-probably-pointless-but/483711/195 "2009-02-05T20:12:36Z")
> [@Guinastasia](#): > > Swallowing wouldn’t allow for conception, though. > Guys, I would watch making TOO much fun of **Kanicbird**. Not that I don’t agree with you, but that he’ll only end up taking it as a sign of his persecution, and only make it worse. > > **Kanicbird** , I WILL say to you, that you’re only making Christianity look worse. I don’t think Jesus meant people to act like nutjobs. I like your use of the word “guys”. You seek to align yourself with “the rest of the guys” with your hateful bullshit. I once thought you were misunderstood. Your own hate betrays your heart. You keep up this path and you will die alone and regreting your actions. I have more pity for you than I ever did before. You can’t even be your own person. How are you going to be some one that some one else has love for. Most people only love themselves. God gives, at least for myself, the ability to put someone else first. That’s what what love is. ---
**Author:** ![Omegaman](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/e480ec/32.png) [@Omegaman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Omegaman)\ **Post date:** [February 5, 2009, 8:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/kanicbird-yeah-its-probably-pointless-but/483711/196 "2009-02-05T20:39:37Z")
> [@Omegaman](#): > > I You keep up this path and you will die alone and regreting your actions. Excuse me, please. That was my bad. You won’t regret shit. You’ll think the whole world is aligned against you and you were in the right and everyone else was fucked up. Well, to be honest, either of us won’t know untill we’re there. I’ve been within minutes. You? ---
**Author:** ![Jack\_Batty](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jack_batty/32/3201_2.png) [@Jack\_Batty](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jack_Batty)\ **Post date:** [February 5, 2009, 9:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/kanicbird-yeah-its-probably-pointless-but/483711/197 "2009-02-05T21:29:53Z")
For such a right-thinking Christian, you sure are a judgmental little fucker. ---
**Author:** ![Guinastasia](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/guinastasia/32/5751_2.png) [@Guinastasia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Guinastasia)\ **Post date:** [February 5, 2009, 9:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/kanicbird-yeah-its-probably-pointless-but/483711/198 "2009-02-05T21:50:14Z")
> [@kanicbird](#): > > The Word disagrees: Not if you alienate people. Do you REALLY think Jesus would want that? You’re also referring to a time when what was thought to be posession by demons is now known to be caused by disease, or mental and/or physical ailments and conditions. I’m an epileptic. Back then, I’d have been exorcised. Are you telling me that demons are causing my seizures, or is it caused by a brain condition? :rolleyes: Not taking _context_ and history and other such things into account can get one in trouble. Jesus’s message was basically “don’t be an asshole”, and unfortunately, too many people decide instead to use him and Christianity as a “Get Out of Hell Free” card, which disgusts me. Rather than, “Love your neighbor, help the poor and unfortunate, etc,” people decide to go around and tell everyone they’re going to hell unless they believe this or that way-that’s fucked up. **Jack Batty** -which one, **Omegaman** , or **Kanicbird**? ---
**Author:** ![Jack\_Batty](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jack_batty/32/3201_2.png) [@Jack\_Batty](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jack_Batty)\ **Post date:** [February 5, 2009, 9:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/kanicbird-yeah-its-probably-pointless-but/483711/199 "2009-02-05T21:53:36Z")
> [@Guinastasia](#): > > **Jack Batty** -which one, **Omegaman** , or **Kanicbird**? **Omegaman**. I find it difficult to insult \*\*Kanicbird \*\*directly, as it isn’t nice to make fun of the mentally ill. ---
**Author:** ![Guinastasia](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/guinastasia/32/5751_2.png) [@Guinastasia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Guinastasia)\ **Post date:** [February 5, 2009, 10:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/kanicbird-yeah-its-probably-pointless-but/483711/200 "2009-02-05T22:03:49Z")
And as nutty as he may be, at least he’s polite and cordial. **Omegaman** … [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/kanicbird-yeah-its-probably-pointless-but/483711.md?page=9) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/kanicbird-yeah-its-probably-pointless-but/483711.md?page=11)