# Kanicbird. Yeah, It's probably pointless, but.. **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [January 30, 2009, 2:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/kanicbird-yeah-its-probably-pointless-but/483711 "2009-01-30T14:37:55Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 23
**Author:** ![Ann\_Onimous](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ea5d25/32.png) [@Ann\_Onimous](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ann_Onimous)\ **Post date:** [February 18, 2009, 3:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/kanicbird-yeah-its-probably-pointless-but/483711/441 "2009-02-18T15:33:44Z")
Could it have been [this](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=507112) thread **Claptree** was speaking of? Same forum, and it sounds like a possible He said/he said/she said. šŸ˜ƒ ---
**Author:** ![Claptree](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/58f4c7/32.png) [@Claptree](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Claptree)\ **Post date:** [February 18, 2009, 3:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/kanicbird-yeah-its-probably-pointless-but/483711/442 "2009-02-18T15:34:01Z")
Gah, two tabs open, copied wrong thread. [Here](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=507112)ā€™s the one I meant. ETA: simulpost, and thanks, **Juliana**. ---
**Author:** ![Ann\_Onimous](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ea5d25/32.png) [@Ann\_Onimous](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ann_Onimous)\ **Post date:** [February 18, 2009, 3:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/kanicbird-yeah-its-probably-pointless-but/483711/443 "2009-02-18T15:36:53Z")
> [@Claptree](#): > > ETA: simulpost, and thanks, **Juliana**. Great minds think alike. Now, you just need to go find the other great mind. Mineā€™s swiss toast today. ---
**Author:** ![Claptree](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/58f4c7/32.png) [@Claptree](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Claptree)\ **Post date:** [February 18, 2009, 3:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/kanicbird-yeah-its-probably-pointless-but/483711/444 "2009-02-18T15:41:18Z")
Well, Iā€™m not feeling like much of a mind today myself, so Iā€™ll just leave both spots open. ---
**Author:** ![KGS](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/90ced4/32.png) [@KGS](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/KGS)\ **Post date:** [February 18, 2009, 3:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/kanicbird-yeah-its-probably-pointless-but/483711/445 "2009-02-18T15:44:03Z")
I kinda feel bad for **kanicbird**. Heā€™s being deceived by an evil spiritual entity (aka The Holy Spirit) whoā€™s telling him that Jesus Christ is the only path to salvation, when in fact, faith in Christ is a direct path to eternal damnation. It makes logical sense ā€“ there are physical entities in our world which feed on the physical energies of other creatures (the deer eats grass, the mountain lion eats deer, etc.) so it only follows that there must be spiritual entities that consume human souls. And I would not place one ounce of trust in ANY spiritual entity that claims to be ā€œthe only wayā€ ā€“ that sort of entity is a demon, plain and simple. So the only way to ā€œsaveā€ your soul (if such a thing is even possible) is to reject the Holy Spirit entirely. Letā€™s just hope and pray that **kanicbird** has no children that heā€™s forcing his Christian beliefs upon ā€“ instilling Christian values in your children is worse than child molestation. ---
**Author:** ![E-Sabbath](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/e19adc/32.png) [@E-Sabbath](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/E-Sabbath)\ **Post date:** [February 18, 2009, 4:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/kanicbird-yeah-its-probably-pointless-but/483711/446 "2009-02-18T16:12:55Z")
Ladies and Gentlemen, we have no idea if KGS actually believes the above. ---
**Author:** ![Lord\_Ashtar](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/7ea924/32.png) [@Lord\_Ashtar](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lord_Ashtar)\ **Post date:** [February 18, 2009, 6:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/kanicbird-yeah-its-probably-pointless-but/483711/447 "2009-02-18T18:09:48Z")
> [@KGS](#): > > I kinda feel bad for **kanicbird**. Heā€™s being deceived by an evil spiritual entity (aka The Holy Spirit) whoā€™s telling him that Jesus Christ is the only path to salvation, when in fact, faith in Christ is a direct path to eternal damnation. It makes logical sense ā€“ there are physical entities in our world which feed on the physical energies of other creatures (the deer eats grass, the mountain lion eats deer, etc.) so it only follows that there must be spiritual entities that consume human souls. And I would not place one ounce of trust in ANY spiritual entity that claims to be ā€œthe only wayā€ ā€“ that sort of entity is a demon, plain and simple. So the only way to ā€œsaveā€ your soul (if such a thing is even possible) is to reject the Holy Spirit entirely. > > Letā€™s just hope and pray that **kanicbird** has no children that heā€™s forcing his Christian beliefs upon ā€“ instilling Christian values in your children is worse than child molestation. If youā€™re going to go that route, what makes you so certain that the evil entity isnā€™t lying to **Kanicbird** and saying itā€™s the Holy Spirit when itā€™s not? ---
**Author:** ![KGS](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/90ced4/32.png) [@KGS](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/KGS)\ **Post date:** [February 18, 2009, 6:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/kanicbird-yeah-its-probably-pointless-but/483711/448 "2009-02-18T18:50:02Z")
> [@Lord\_Ashtar](#): > > If youā€™re going to go that route, what makes you so certain that the evil entity isnā€™t lying to **Kanicbird** and saying itā€™s the Holy Spirit when itā€™s not? Thatā€™s exactly my point. This Spirit ā€“ whatever you want to call it ā€“ is essentialy lying to **kanicbird** , filling his head with immaculate delusions of salvation, original sin, eternal life in heaven, and the imminent Rapture (which BTW isnā€™t even in the frickinā€™ Bible!) I see from above people claiming that he has a form of schizophrenia, and essentially, thatā€™s the truth. Fundamentalist religion is inherently delusional, and the only reason people like that arenā€™t institutionalized and pumped up with antipsychotic drugs is because thereā€™s millions of other people who share the same soul-destroying delusion; which makes it ā€œreligionā€, not mental illness. Not to mention that free religion is explicitly condoned in our very Constitutionā€¦geez, thanks a lot, Founding Fathers. :rolleyes: Back when I was a fundamentalist Christian (not by choice, I was raised that way) I would often hear evangelists talk about the ā€œharvest of soulsā€ ā€“ because, the main tenent of **kanicbird** ā€™s type of Christianity is to convert as many people as possible to their religion, thus feeding more souls to that demonic God they worship. Kinda like those [brain parasites](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Leucochloridium_paradoxum) that take over the minds of snails, causing them to crawl into exposed places where birds can eat them and continue the parasiteā€™s life cycle. Nice adaptive behavior, eh? You almost have to admire the evil nature of God, from an evolutionary standpoint. ---
**Author:** ![kaylasdad99](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kaylasdad99/32/3398_2.png) [@kaylasdad99](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kaylasdad99)\ **Post date:** [February 18, 2009, 6:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/kanicbird-yeah-its-probably-pointless-but/483711/449 "2009-02-18T18:59:19Z")
NOT ā€œtenent.ā€ Not even ā€œtenant.ā€ TENET ---
**Author:** ![Liberal](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/848f3c/32.png) [@Liberal](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Liberal)\ **Post date:** [February 18, 2009, 7:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/kanicbird-yeah-its-probably-pointless-but/483711/450 "2009-02-18T19:02:55Z")
> [@KGS](#): > > Letā€™s just hope and pray that **kanicbird** has no children that heā€™s forcing his Christian beliefs upon ā€“ instilling Christian values in your children is worse than child molestation. Looks like your parents failed. Spectacularly. ---
**Author:** ![Ensign\_Edison](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/7ab992/32.png) [@Ensign\_Edison](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ensign_Edison)\ **Post date:** [February 18, 2009, 7:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/kanicbird-yeah-its-probably-pointless-but/483711/451 "2009-02-18T19:03:59Z")
Out of curiosity, Liberal, how do you know what you believe is God _isnā€™t_ an evil spirit? Even when I was a believer I struggled with that question, so Iā€™m curious if youā€™ve been able to answer it. ---
**Author:** ![Liberal](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/848f3c/32.png) [@Liberal](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Liberal)\ **Post date:** [February 18, 2009, 7:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/kanicbird-yeah-its-probably-pointless-but/483711/452 "2009-02-18T19:08:24Z")
> [@Ensign\_Edison](#): > > Out of curiosity, Liberal, how do you know what you believe is God _isnā€™t_ an evil spirit? Even when I was a believer I struggled with that question, so Iā€™m curious if youā€™ve been able to answer it. Itā€™s been a long time since the old Great Debates threads, hasnā€™t it. If I knew there would be participants of your calibre, and that the thread wouldnā€™t be wrecked by Lekatt on the one extreme and Der Trihs on the other, Iā€™d reopen a discussion about the Aesthetical Jesus, and the deductions that I believe support my faith. Much hinges on definitions, as you know. Can you recall how I define goodness? How I define love? And how I define both God and reality? ---
**Author:** ![KGS](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/90ced4/32.png) [@KGS](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/KGS)\ **Post date:** [February 18, 2009, 7:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/kanicbird-yeah-its-probably-pointless-but/483711/453 "2009-02-18T19:12:10Z")
> [@Liberal](#): > > Looks like your parents failed. Spectacularly. Thatā€™s an understatement. But itā€™s okay, theyā€™re both getting old and will die soon. ---
**Author:** ![Liberal](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/848f3c/32.png) [@Liberal](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Liberal)\ **Post date:** [February 18, 2009, 7:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/kanicbird-yeah-its-probably-pointless-but/483711/454 "2009-02-18T19:16:18Z")
> [@KGS](#): > > Thatā€™s an understatement. But itā€™s okay, theyā€™re both getting old and will die soon. Thatā€™s rather pointless, isnā€™t it? Their deed has already been done. Of interest is what happens to you, not them. ---
**Author:** ![KGS](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/90ced4/32.png) [@KGS](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/KGS)\ **Post date:** [February 18, 2009, 7:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/kanicbird-yeah-its-probably-pointless-but/483711/455 "2009-02-18T19:26:00Z")
> [@Liberal](#): > > Thatā€™s rather pointless, isnā€™t it? Their deed has already been done. Oh itā€™s still going on, believe me. You wouldnā€™t believe the nasty shit Iā€™ve found out about both of them recently. Whatā€™s really heinous is that the extended family seems to _know_ all about them, but have chosen to ignore their abusive behavior because, hey, itā€™s easier to believe the comfortable lie than the cold, hard truth. But never mind that. Donā€™t wanna hijack this thread any further, letā€™s get back to picking on **kanicbird** , shall we? šŸ˜‰ ---
**Author:** ![Lord\_Ashtar](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/7ea924/32.png) [@Lord\_Ashtar](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lord_Ashtar)\ **Post date:** [February 18, 2009, 7:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/kanicbird-yeah-its-probably-pointless-but/483711/456 "2009-02-18T19:39:36Z")
> [@KGS](#): > > Thatā€™s exactly my point. This Spirit ā€“ whatever you want to call it ā€“ is essentialy lying to **kanicbird** , filling his head with immaculate delusions of salvation, original sin, eternal life in heaven, and the imminent Rapture (which BTW isnā€™t even in the frickinā€™ Bible!) In my mind, itā€™s one thing to say that **Kanicbird** is being manipulated by an evil spirit and quite another to say that the Holy Spirit itself is evil. But whatever. ---
**Author:** ![Guinastasia](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/guinastasia/32/5751_2.png) [@Guinastasia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Guinastasia)\ **Post date:** [February 18, 2009, 7:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/kanicbird-yeah-its-probably-pointless-but/483711/457 "2009-02-18T19:59:40Z")
Letā€™s not forget his [ā€œadviceā€](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showpost.php?p=10826552&postcount=62) to **muldoonthief** , in thread about a daycareā€™s inattention to a young girlā€™s peanut allergies. > [@Liberal](#): > > Thatā€™s a weird assessment given that Der Trihs had already derailed it in the 4th post of the thread with his usual infantile diatribe against faith and the faithful. Heeeeyyy-now thereā€™s an idea! Lock **Der Trihs** and **Kanicbird** in a room together, film it, and then sell it on Pay-Per-View!!! Look, for the record, Iā€™d just like to say that while I donā€™t know if I believe that Jesus was God or not, I do think weā€™d be better off we followed most of his teachings. Now, the ones Iā€™m talking about are the ones about how to TREAT others-the Sermon on the Mount. Do unto others as you would have done unto you. Aid the poor, help the sick, the weak-protect the misfortunate. Basically, Jesus was saying, really: donā€™t be an asshole. Too bad so many of his followers ignore this in favor of the old ā€œget out of hell free,ā€ card. Now, I havenā€™t seen **Kanicbird** act like that PRECISELY. (Iā€™m thinking more of the **Wildest Bill** , or **His4Ever** types). But **Kanicbird** seems to be the whole, ā€œpride goeth before destruction.ā€ He strikes me as someone who thinks he has all the answers. And extremely judgemental. The examples linked above-the peanut thread, and the evolution one-are perfect examples. Somehow, though, I suspect heā€™d be this way even if he werenā€™t Christian-if he were an atheist, or whatever. Just like I think **Der Trihs** would act the same way if he were a Christian/Jew/Muslim/Buddhist/Scientologist blah blah blah. Itā€™s using religion as an excuse to act like a nut. ---
**Author:** ![kaylasdad99](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kaylasdad99/32/3398_2.png) [@kaylasdad99](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kaylasdad99)\ **Post date:** [February 18, 2009, 8:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/kanicbird-yeah-its-probably-pointless-but/483711/458 "2009-02-18T20:27:55Z")
I donā€™t really anticipate much of a show in a **kanicbird** / **Der Trihs** cage match, **Guin**. Whatever else may be fairly observed about his belief system, **kanicbird** has not shown himself to be one to return blow for blow. I imagine it might look like the [_corrida_](http://www.amazon.com/Story-Ferdinand-Puffin-Storytime/dp/0142409529/ref=pd_bbs_sr_1?ie=UTF8&s=books&qid=1234988551&sr=8-1) as described by Munro Leaf. ---
**Author:** ![Guinastasia](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/guinastasia/32/5751_2.png) [@Guinastasia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Guinastasia)\ **Post date:** [February 18, 2009, 8:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/kanicbird-yeah-its-probably-pointless-but/483711/459 "2009-02-18T20:33:01Z")
Oh, I remember Ferdinand!!! Yeah, I guess youā€™re right. Oh well. ---
**Author:** ![Liberal](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/848f3c/32.png) [@Liberal](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Liberal)\ **Post date:** [February 18, 2009, 9:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/kanicbird-yeah-its-probably-pointless-but/483711/460 "2009-02-18T21:00:55Z")
> [@Guinastasia](#): > > Somehow, though, I suspect heā€™d be this way even if he werenā€™t Christian-if he were an atheist, or whatever. Just like I think **Der Trihs** would act the same way if he were a Christian/Jew/Muslim/Buddhist/Scientologist blah blah blah. I think thatā€™s very insightful. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/kanicbird-yeah-its-probably-pointless-but/483711.md?page=22)