# Karate Massacre **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [October 4, 2017, 10:22am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/karate-massacre/797934 "2017-10-04T10:22:49Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![Mavic\_Chen](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/e56c9b/32.png) [@Mavic\_Chen](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mavic_Chen)\ **Post date:** [October 4, 2017, 4:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/karate-massacre/797934/21 "2017-10-04T16:14:23Z")
Totally a cool band name: “Karate Massacre” love it. As long as they play at 420bpm and is exclusively blast beats, gravity blasts, trem picking and sweep picking. ---
**Author:** ![Trafalgar\_Laura](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/trafalgar_laura/32/2907_2.png) [@Trafalgar\_Laura](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Trafalgar_Laura)\ **Post date:** [October 4, 2017, 4:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/karate-massacre/797934/22 "2017-10-04T16:47:35Z")
I feel vaguely embarrassed for answering this hypothetical so seriously, but in my defense, I was half asleep. Anyway, Single Karate Dude != Multiple angry dudes who shoot at crowds. ---
**Author:** ![Dead\_Cat](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/9fc29f/32.png) [@Dead\_Cat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dead_Cat)\ **Post date:** [October 4, 2017, 4:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/karate-massacre/797934/23 "2017-10-04T16:56:38Z")
I voted for option 1, but I suppose I should have voted for “Other” and said “Analogy fail”. Apart from the good points already made, it would take many, many hours of time and dedication to achieve the level of martial arts skill posited in the OP, whereas it takes a couple of hours to buy a gun and learn how to fire it (not with any kind of accuracy, but in a crowd of people that doesn’t matter). Plus most martial arts have a non-aggressive code of practice (yes, someone incredibly dedicated and sufficiently skilled could pretend to be peaceful through their training and then turn their skills to bad ends, but it’s much more unlikely than some crazy person buying an automatic weapon). ---
**Author:** ![Iggy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/iggy/32/3364_2.png) [@Iggy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Iggy)\ **Post date:** [October 4, 2017, 5:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/karate-massacre/797934/24 "2017-10-04T17:22:17Z")
Other. We need to ban hands. Hands are obviously killing machines. I would feel much safer if other people do not have hands. ---
**Author:** ![adaher](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/dec6dc/32.png) [@adaher](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/adaher)\ **Post date:** [October 4, 2017, 6:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/karate-massacre/797934/25 "2017-10-04T18:11:23Z")
While the OP is sillly, there is actually sort of a real life analogue: the use of cars as weapons of mass killing. A big truck can easily kill more people than the worst shooter. The Las vegas shooter established a record by shooting 59. The truck terrorist in Paris killed 84. With the increasingly common use of vehicles as murder weapons, eventually we will have this conversation. I suspect this ends with self driving cars becoming mandatory and human driven cars illegal. ---
**Author:** ![Johnny\_Bravo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/johnny_bravo/32/493_2.png) [@Johnny\_Bravo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Johnny_Bravo)\ **Post date:** [October 4, 2017, 7:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/karate-massacre/797934/26 "2017-10-04T19:25:59Z")
> [@adaher](#): > > I suspect this ends with self driving cars becoming mandatory and human driven cars illegal. Before that happens, I think we’ll see cars that aren’t fully automated, but that have the same kinds of cameras and software as driverless vehicles. They’ll be unable to accelerate into crowds of people. Municipalities will be able to dynamically set certain areas as “pedestrian zones,” and cars won’t be able to enter them at all, or will be speed limited inside them. ---
**Author:** ![adaher](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/dec6dc/32.png) [@adaher](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/adaher)\ **Post date:** [October 4, 2017, 7:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/karate-massacre/797934/27 "2017-10-04T19:28:14Z")
Wonder if we can do the same with guns? Perhaps make them so that they can only shoot at other people who have guns? ---
**Author:** ![Grey](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/b782af/32.png) [@Grey](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Grey)\ **Post date:** [October 4, 2017, 7:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/karate-massacre/797934/28 "2017-10-04T19:34:04Z")
Would make hunting season far more fun I suppose. ---
**Author:** ![adaher](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/dec6dc/32.png) [@adaher](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/adaher)\ **Post date:** [October 4, 2017, 7:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/karate-massacre/797934/29 "2017-10-04T19:34:44Z")
Heh. Presumably you could fire at anything not human unless that human carried a gun. ---
**Author:** ![Delicious](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/dbc845/32.png) [@Delicious](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Delicious)\ **Post date:** [October 4, 2017, 7:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/karate-massacre/797934/30 "2017-10-04T19:41:39Z")
All the mass murderers would target furry conventions/pantomime horses ---
**Author:** ![adaher](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/dec6dc/32.png) [@adaher](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/adaher)\ **Post date:** [October 4, 2017, 7:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/karate-massacre/797934/31 "2017-10-04T19:51:55Z")
There would be a big uptick in the murder of sports team mascots and Disney cast members ---
**Author:** ![Horatius](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/horatius/32/3572_2.png) [@Horatius](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Horatius)\ **Post date:** [October 4, 2017, 8:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/karate-massacre/797934/32 "2017-10-04T20:55:51Z")
> [@Delicious](#): > > All the mass murderers would target furry conventions/pantomime horses > [@adaher](#): > > There would be a big uptick in the murder of sports team mascots and Disney cast members Okay, but what’s the downside? ---
**Author:** ![Skywatcher](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/skywatcher/32/254_2.png) [@Skywatcher](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Skywatcher)\ **Post date:** [October 4, 2017, 9:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/karate-massacre/797934/33 "2017-10-04T21:32:13Z")
> [@Johnny\_Bravo](#): > > Municipalities will be able to dynamically set certain areas as “pedestrian zones,” and cars won’t be able to enter them at all, or will be speed limited inside them. These already exist. [Here’s the most famous.](https://www.google.com/maps/@38.8987437,-77.0336695,3a,75y,277.27h,83.7t/data=!3m7!1e1!3m5!1sLgPAAS3fuB2Bu5co_kMFlw!2e0!6s%2F%2Fgeo1.ggpht.com%2Fcbk%3Fpanoid%3DLgPAAS3fuB2Bu5co_kMFlw%26output%3Dthumbnail%26cb_client%3Dmaps_sv.tactile.gps%26thumb%3D2%26w%3D203%26h%3D100%26yaw%3D109.27714%26pitch%3D0%26thumbfov%3D100!7i13312!8i6656) ---
**Author:** ![snfaulkner](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/snfaulkner/32/433_2.png) [@snfaulkner](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/snfaulkner)\ **Post date:** [October 4, 2017, 10:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/karate-massacre/797934/34 "2017-10-04T22:11:18Z")
I would sign up to the Chopmaster dojo. SHUT UP AND TAKE MY MONEY! ---
**Author:** ![Trinopus](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/2bfe46/32.png) [@Trinopus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Trinopus)\ **Post date:** [October 4, 2017, 11:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/karate-massacre/797934/35 "2017-10-04T23:58:18Z")
Is it true, or only an UL, that, in bygone days, boxers had to register their hands as weapons? If it is true, then we could easily revive those laws. ---
**Author:** ![Smapti](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/smapti/32/17938_2.png) [@Smapti](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Smapti)\ **Post date:** [October 5, 2017, 12:37am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/karate-massacre/797934/36 "2017-10-05T00:37:40Z")
> [@Gatopescado](#): > > Somebody with a CCW would have taken him out after the 4th chop. You assume he can’t karate chop the bullets out of the air. ---
**Author:** ![Beckdawrek](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/beckdawrek/32/3647_2.png) [@Beckdawrek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Beckdawrek)\ **Post date:** [October 5, 2017, 1:22am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/karate-massacre/797934/37 "2017-10-05T01:22:33Z")
What about Chuck Norris for the lead role? Oh, so sorry, didn’t realize this was a poll. ---
**Author:** ![kopek](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kopek/32/337_2.png) [@kopek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kopek)\ **Post date:** [October 5, 2017, 3:45am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/karate-massacre/797934/38 "2017-10-05T03:45:54Z")
> [@Iggy](#): > > Other. > > We need to ban hands. Hands are obviously killing machines. I would feel much safer if other people do not have hands. But then you have hooks. Possibly sharp hooks. Getting caught on some teenagers car door handle. And what about pointed sticks? 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Delicious](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/dbc845/32.png) [@Delicious](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Delicious)\ **Post date:** [October 5, 2017, 8:28am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/karate-massacre/797934/39 "2017-10-05T08:28:34Z")
> [@Iggy](#): > > Other. > > We need to ban hands. Hands are obviously killing machines. I would feel much safer if other people do not have hands. This is a sensible short-term solution, but long-term, what do we do when a taekwondo master kicks 60 people’s heads off? ---
**Author:** ![Mangetout](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mangetout/32/19_2.png) [@Mangetout](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mangetout)\ **Post date:** [October 5, 2017, 10:41am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/karate-massacre/797934/40 "2017-10-05T10:41:20Z")
> [@Johnny\_Bravo](#): > > Interesting. > > The court of High Robots would have to convene a grand puppy jury to deliberate, but only on alternating brunch Sundays. Right, so you’re not even going to _consult_ the Squid Lords? Pfft. Typical. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/karate-massacre/797934.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/karate-massacre/797934.md?page=3)