# Kill a member of the Fellowship **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [August 17, 2015, 1:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/kill-a-member-of-the-fellowship/728068 "2015-08-17T13:34:17Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 15\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![j666](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/9de0a6/32.png) [@j666](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/j666)\ **Post date:** [August 18, 2015, 1:40am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/kill-a-member-of-the-fellowship/728068/21 "2015-08-18T01:40:02Z")
In the book, Aragorn. Arrogant, difficult to work with, expecting to step right into the kingship after Stewards had held the line all those years. I did not like him. In the movie, Merry; he annoyed me, and he was way to worried about who was taller. ---
**Author:** ![Lumpy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lumpy/32/446_2.png) [@Lumpy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lumpy)\ **Post date:** [August 18, 2015, 3:06am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/kill-a-member-of-the-fellowship/728068/22 "2015-08-18T03:06:44Z")
Do Merry and Pippin do anything that wouldn’t have happened if there were just one of them? I’d say one or the other are completely expendable (I don’t even remember anything to distinguish the two). ---
**Author:** ![Ethilrist](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ethilrist/32/4604_2.png) [@Ethilrist](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ethilrist)\ **Post date:** [August 18, 2015, 12:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/kill-a-member-of-the-fellowship/728068/23 "2015-08-18T12:22:58Z")
> [@Lumpy](#): > > Do Merry and Pippin do anything that wouldn’t have happened if there were just one of them? I’d say one or the other are completely expendable (I don’t even remember anything to distinguish the two). If there was only one to stay in Rohan, then Faramir would be toast. If the one went to Minas Tirith instead, Eowyn might not have been inspired to get her head in the game and go kill the Witch King. ---
**Author:** ![lawoot](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/35a633/32.png) [@lawoot](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lawoot)\ **Post date:** [August 18, 2015, 1:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/kill-a-member-of-the-fellowship/728068/24 "2015-08-18T13:29:45Z")
> [@Ethilrist](#): > > If there was only one to stay in Rohan, then Faramir would be toast. But would Faramir have even told his father about Frodo and the Ring, if he hadn’t been inspired by seeing Pippin in Minas Tirith? ---
**Author:** ![bucketybuck](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/898d66/32.png) [@bucketybuck](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/bucketybuck)\ **Post date:** [August 18, 2015, 1:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/kill-a-member-of-the-fellowship/728068/25 "2015-08-18T13:46:23Z")
Fucking hobbits. You cannot tell me that had they replaced the hobbits with some badass elves or Rangers that the fellowship wouldn’t have ghosted themselves right up to Mount Doom tout suite. They could have crossed those wintery mountains easy except for the hobbits. It was the hobbits that made all the racket in Moria that attracted the goblins. It was the hobbits that got captured and caused the breakup of the fellowship. The hobbits were just a pain in the hole, replace them with Glorfindal and watch the fellowship kick ass and take names without the need for any of that other drama. So I picked Merry, because he is a hobbit and in the films his actor was a smug cunt. ---
**Author:** ![Ethilrist](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ethilrist/32/4604_2.png) [@Ethilrist](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ethilrist)\ **Post date:** [August 18, 2015, 2:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/kill-a-member-of-the-fellowship/728068/26 "2015-08-18T14:19:43Z")
> [@lawoot](#): > > But would Faramir have even told his father about Frodo and the Ring, if he hadn’t been inspired by seeing Pippin in Minas Tirith? No Hobbit in Minas Tirith also means no Palantir to drive Denethor over the edge, so yeah. I don’t think Denethor would have been sending Faramir out on a suicide run with no knowledge of The Ring. He’d still probably be pretty cheesed off about Boromir being dead and all. ---
**Author:** ![Chimera](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/8e8cbc/32.png) [@Chimera](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chimera)\ **Post date:** [August 18, 2015, 2:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/kill-a-member-of-the-fellowship/728068/27 "2015-08-18T14:46:51Z")
> [@bucketybuck](#): > > . The hobbits were just a pain in the hole, replace them with Glorfindal and watch the fellowship kick ass and take names without the need for any of that other drama. And watch Sauron go “Oh look, there’s this great glowing powerful ELF attempting to walk right up to my front door!” :smack: ---
**Author:** ![bucketybuck](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/898d66/32.png) [@bucketybuck](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/bucketybuck)\ **Post date:** [August 18, 2015, 2:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/kill-a-member-of-the-fellowship/728068/28 "2015-08-18T14:57:43Z")
> [@Chimera](#): > > And watch Sauron go “Oh look, there’s this great glowing powerful ELF attempting to walk right up to my front door!” :smack: Meh, Glorfindal isn’t a nightlight, he could go all ninja if he wanted to. Besides, if Sauron has a problem with any of this he can moan about it right up till the point Glorfindal kicks him in the balls. ---
**Author:** ![John\_Mace](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/john_mace/32/185_2.png) [@John\_Mace](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/John_Mace)\ **Post date:** [August 18, 2015, 3:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/kill-a-member-of-the-fellowship/728068/29 "2015-08-18T15:26:09Z")
Gimli. He really didn’t do anything that mattered. Everyone else had some sort of role in a key plot element. He’s a true Affirmative Action token Dwarf! 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![Your\_Great\_Darsh\_Face](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/y/ac8455/32.png) [@Your\_Great\_Darsh\_Face](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Your_Great_Darsh_Face)\ **Post date:** [August 18, 2015, 4:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/kill-a-member-of-the-fellowship/728068/30 "2015-08-18T16:18:55Z")
> [@Ethilrist](#): > > No Hobbit in Minas Tirith also means no Palantir to drive Denethor over the edge, so yeah. I don’t think Denethor would have been sending Faramir out on a suicide run with no knowledge of The Ring. He’d still probably be pretty cheesed off about Boromir being dead and all. Denethor had his own _palantir_ that had nothing to do with Pippin. The one that Pippin got his hands on was the Orthanc stone; Minas Tirith had one that Denethor kept secret. And without Pippin, Gandalf would have looked in the Orthanc stone and been caught by Sauron. Without Merry, the Witch-King doesn’t buy the farm at Pelennor Fields, although whether that actually influences the outcome of the battle is open to question. It may be that the prophecy means that Gandalf is fated not to kill him, but that can perfectly well come true if Gandalf sears him within an inch of his unlife and he flees the battle squealing like a little girl. But also without Merry and the Horn of Rohan, the Shire don’t rise to drive out Sharkey and the gang, so Frodo’s homecoming is not too cheery. ---
**Author:** ![the\_diego](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/7bcc69/32.png) [@the\_diego](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/the_diego)\ **Post date:** [August 23, 2015, 2:45am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/kill-a-member-of-the-fellowship/728068/31 "2015-08-23T02:45:01Z")
Frodo. With eight people as back up, that’s a pretty deep allowance. ---
**Author:** ![the\_diego](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/7bcc69/32.png) [@the\_diego](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/the_diego)\ **Post date:** [August 23, 2015, 2:49am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/kill-a-member-of-the-fellowship/728068/32 "2015-08-23T02:49:07Z")
> [@John\_Mace](#): > > Gimli. He really didn’t do anything that mattered. Everyone else had some sort of role in a key plot element. He’s a true Affirmative Action token Dwarf! 🙂 Gimli appears to have influenced the leadetship at Lorien, and even Rohan. He did save Eomer. ---
**Author:** ![Colibri](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/colibri/32/1841_2.png) [@Colibri](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Colibri)\ **Post date:** [August 23, 2015, 2:51am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/kill-a-member-of-the-fellowship/728068/33 "2015-08-23T02:51:26Z")
Pippin. Annoying little git. ---
**Author:** ![Knorf](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/58956e/32.png) [@Knorf](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Knorf)\ **Post date:** [August 23, 2015, 4:26am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/kill-a-member-of-the-fellowship/728068/34 "2015-08-23T04:26:02Z")
For Ilúvatar’s sake, it’s **Glorfindel**. I’d choose to off Pippin. ---
**Author:** ![Ethilrist](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ethilrist/32/4604_2.png) [@Ethilrist](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ethilrist)\ **Post date:** [August 23, 2015, 12:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/kill-a-member-of-the-fellowship/728068/35 "2015-08-23T12:47:09Z")
> [@the\_diego](#): > > Gimli appears to have influenced the leadetship at Lorien, and even Rohan. He did save Eomer. Plus, he got to blow the hell-tuba! That’s gotta count for something! why’d they put the mouthpiece low enough that he could reach it? do they normally leave that task to some little kid? That’s just sad. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/kill-a-member-of-the-fellowship/728068.md?page=1)