# Kinda-sorta wise quotes or sayings you made up **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [August 19, 2015, 12:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/kinda-sorta-wise-quotes-or-sayings-you-made-up/728256 "2015-08-19T12:48:43Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![Mangetout](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mangetout/32/19_2.png) [@Mangetout](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mangetout)\ **Post date:** [August 19, 2015, 7:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/kinda-sorta-wise-quotes-or-sayings-you-made-up/728256/21 "2015-08-19T19:40:33Z")
Anything is easy, if someone else must do it. ---
**Author:** ![The\_Stainless\_Steel\_Rat](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/the_stainless_steel_rat/32/5727_2.png) [@The\_Stainless\_Steel\_Rat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_Stainless_Steel_Rat)\ **Post date:** [August 19, 2015, 7:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/kinda-sorta-wise-quotes-or-sayings-you-made-up/728256/22 "2015-08-19T19:57:22Z")
Not sure I can claim authorship, but “Everybody is ignorant in a lot of ways; for example, I have no idea how to change the spark plugs in my car. It’s when you don’t know (or even worse, don’t _care_) that you are ignorant that you start to act Stupid.” ---
**Author:** ![Dung\_Beetle](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dung_beetle/32/7945_2.png) [@Dung\_Beetle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dung_Beetle)\ **Post date:** [August 19, 2015, 7:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/kinda-sorta-wise-quotes-or-sayings-you-made-up/728256/23 "2015-08-19T19:59:43Z")
> [@Ayatollah Yawuntz](#): > > I can’t remember where I heard this and I can’t find it anywhere. Who knows, maybe I made it up? Who said this? I’d like to know what else they had to say: > > “It’s important to know the difference between how you actually feel and how you think you are supposed/expected to feel.” Well, I like it and agree. In training a new girl at work, I’ve found myself repeating a few things: “Just act like you know what you’re doing. We’ll figure it out later.” “I don’t know anything; I only know who to ask about it.” And this one, which I don’t recall saying but it sounds like me. (A co-worker had written it down and posted it at her desk): “The people on the phone can’t see you flipping them the bird.” ---
**Author:** ![Cold\_Dish](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/ce7236/32.png) [@Cold\_Dish](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cold_Dish)\ **Post date:** [August 19, 2015, 8:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/kinda-sorta-wise-quotes-or-sayings-you-made-up/728256/24 "2015-08-19T20:30:44Z")
Funerals are for the living, and first birthday parties are for the mothers. ---
**Author:** ![mo50](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/8797f3/32.png) [@mo50](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/mo50)\ **Post date:** [August 19, 2015, 8:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/kinda-sorta-wise-quotes-or-sayings-you-made-up/728256/25 "2015-08-19T20:45:56Z")
Ya can’t run away from your problems, but you can have a helluva lotta fun tryin’! ---
**Author:** ![Trinopus](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/2bfe46/32.png) [@Trinopus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Trinopus)\ **Post date:** [August 19, 2015, 9:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/kinda-sorta-wise-quotes-or-sayings-you-made-up/728256/26 "2015-08-19T21:06:37Z")
There will always be those who would rather know than learn. ---
**Author:** ![CinnamonBabka](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/bbce88/32.png) [@CinnamonBabka](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CinnamonBabka)\ **Post date:** [August 19, 2015, 9:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/kinda-sorta-wise-quotes-or-sayings-you-made-up/728256/27 "2015-08-19T21:08:58Z")
Your opinion isn’t valid simply because you have it. ---
**Author:** ![TheSeaOtter](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/ed655f/32.png) [@TheSeaOtter](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TheSeaOtter)\ **Post date:** [August 19, 2015, 9:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/kinda-sorta-wise-quotes-or-sayings-you-made-up/728256/28 "2015-08-19T21:16:10Z")
“The problem is that we, the US, basically got a late alpha version of Democracy. We got it first, but it’s full of bugs, is missing a bunch of features, and has no working upgrade path.” ---
**Author:** ![pohjonen](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/pohjonen/32/423_2.png) [@pohjonen](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pohjonen)\ **Post date:** [August 19, 2015, 9:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/kinda-sorta-wise-quotes-or-sayings-you-made-up/728256/29 "2015-08-19T21:24:28Z")
Blood is thicker than competence. ---
**Author:** ![Annie-Xmas](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ecc23a/32.png) [@Annie-Xmas](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Annie-Xmas)\ **Post date:** [August 19, 2015, 9:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/kinda-sorta-wise-quotes-or-sayings-you-made-up/728256/30 "2015-08-19T21:30:20Z")
There’s big problems and little problems. Anything that can be solved with cash is a little problem. ---
**Author:** ![Mean\_Mr.Mustard](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mean_mr.mustard/32/3865_2.png) [@Mean\_Mr.Mustard](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mean_Mr.Mustard)\ **Post date:** [August 19, 2015, 9:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/kinda-sorta-wise-quotes-or-sayings-you-made-up/728256/31 "2015-08-19T21:47:26Z")
You miss 100 per cent of the shots you don’t take. - Wayne Gretzky - Michael Scott - mmm ---
**Author:** ![Kent\_Clark](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kent_clark/32/105_2.png) [@Kent\_Clark](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kent_Clark)\ **Post date:** [August 19, 2015, 10:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/kinda-sorta-wise-quotes-or-sayings-you-made-up/728256/32 "2015-08-19T22:10:24Z")
After our server went down at work: “Technology isn’t just a bitch, she wears boots and carries a whip.” To my son, the first time a girl broke his heart: “Some girls treat boys like clothes. They like to try them on, but don’t really want to keep anything.” ---
**Author:** ![Superhal](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/b4bc9f/32.png) [@Superhal](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Superhal)\ **Post date:** [August 19, 2015, 10:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/kinda-sorta-wise-quotes-or-sayings-you-made-up/728256/33 "2015-08-19T22:23:38Z")
> [@TriPolar](#): > > Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice and I’ll pop a cap in your ass. Second part, I like to put “…I’ll slash your tires.” > [@Mean\_Mr.Mustard](#): > > You miss 100 per cent of the shots you don’t take. > - Wayne Gretzky > - Michael Scott > - mmm ``` -Yoda ``` “Try? There is no try. Do, or do not.” I always think of this when I see the meme “There’s no way I’m going to do \ / Not with that attitude!” More: “If life is made up of failures, you’ don’t want to be known as the high score.” “I don’t care about other people’s religions, I just wish they didn’t care so much about mine.” “You know why people hate liberals? Because liberals lecture you on the “right way” to live…for example.” ---
**Author:** ![Inigo\_Montoya](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/inigo_montoya/32/124_2.png) [@Inigo\_Montoya](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Inigo_Montoya)\ **Post date:** [August 19, 2015, 10:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/kinda-sorta-wise-quotes-or-sayings-you-made-up/728256/34 "2015-08-19T22:29:23Z")
Romanes eunt domus. ---
**Author:** ![P-man](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/p-man/32/3606_2.png) [@P-man](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/P-man)\ **Post date:** [August 19, 2015, 10:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/kinda-sorta-wise-quotes-or-sayings-you-made-up/728256/35 "2015-08-19T22:42:07Z")
The things that bother you the most when done by others are the ones you do yourself. ---
**Author:** ![Chefguy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/chefguy/32/138_2.png) [@Chefguy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chefguy)\ **Post date:** [August 19, 2015, 11:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/kinda-sorta-wise-quotes-or-sayings-you-made-up/728256/36 "2015-08-19T23:05:53Z")
To my son upon his first driving lesson: Don’t let “I had the right of way” be your epitaph. ---
**Author:** ![Grestarian](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/grestarian/32/3227_2.png) [@Grestarian](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Grestarian)\ **Post date:** [August 19, 2015, 11:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/kinda-sorta-wise-quotes-or-sayings-you-made-up/728256/37 "2015-08-19T23:11:40Z")
I mutter this inside my helmet at least twice on the way to work and twice on they way home – although it’s never about the same people twice in a week: Relax, rivet-brain! The Road is not a racetrack. I mutter this inside my helmet at least twice a month, sometimes on the way to work or on the way home: Mellow out, Mis(ter). [COLOR=Red] **WE** are not racing; **I** am not a rat.[/COLOR] I say this whenever someone comes to my team with a great technological idea that will be “real easy to implement”: Remember: A ‘simple’ task is never simple. …and sometimes the person will respond “Well, it works in theory!” To which I retort: Sure! But _Perpetual Motion_ works in theory. [COLOR=Black]–G! [/COLOR] ---
**Author:** ![Superhal](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/b4bc9f/32.png) [@Superhal](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Superhal)\ **Post date:** [August 19, 2015, 11:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/kinda-sorta-wise-quotes-or-sayings-you-made-up/728256/38 "2015-08-19T23:13:21Z")
> [@Chefguy](#): > > To my son upon his first driving lesson: Don’t let “I had the right of way” be your epitaph. Heh I’ve taught a few people driving before: “Let me know when you need to go somewhere, I’ll stay off the sidewalk.” “[Driving stick]: If you can go uphill, in reverse, over a speed bump, at 2 mph, you can do anything.” “The most dangerous road in the world: a supermarket or shopping center full of people only looking at their cell phones.” ---
**Author:** ![iamthewalrus\_3](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/258eb7/32.png) [@iamthewalrus\_3](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/iamthewalrus_3)\ **Post date:** [August 19, 2015, 11:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/kinda-sorta-wise-quotes-or-sayings-you-made-up/728256/39 "2015-08-19T23:32:51Z")
The Lord works in confirmationally-biased ways. ---
**Author:** ![leftfield6](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/leftfield6/32/18780_2.png) [@leftfield6](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/leftfield6)\ **Post date:** [August 20, 2015, 12:56am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/kinda-sorta-wise-quotes-or-sayings-you-made-up/728256/40 "2015-08-20T00:56:34Z")
> [@Grestarian](#): > > I mutter this inside my helmet at least twice on the way to work and twice on they way home – although it’s never about the same people twice in a week: > Relax, rivet-brain! The Road is not a racetrack. > > I mutter this inside my helmet at least twice a month, sometimes on the way to work or on the way home: > Mellow out, Mis(ter). [COLOR=Red] **WE** are not racing; **I** am not a rat.[/COLOR] See, I think motorcycle riders have great thoughts, because the helmet keeps them bouncing around in there. Inside _my_ helmet, when I am on the way to work, I’ll sometimes wind up getting caught up in the traffic frustration, and wind up going faster than I want to, trying to “win” little traffic battles. Then some part of my brain chimes in with "Are you really in a hurry to get TO work? [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/kinda-sorta-wise-quotes-or-sayings-you-made-up/728256.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/kinda-sorta-wise-quotes-or-sayings-you-made-up/728256.md?page=3)