# Klingon Proverbs **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [October 23, 2003, 12:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/klingon-proverbs/209095 "2003-10-23T12:48:50Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![carnivorousplant](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/carnivorousplant/32/3563_2.png) [@carnivorousplant](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/carnivorousplant)\ **Post date:** [October 23, 2003, 12:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/klingon-proverbs/209095/1 "2003-10-23T12:48:50Z")
I came to a road that diverged in two woods; I slew the first man who refused to give me directions and the rest were forthcoming. On the journey through life, you will find dangerous chasms. They are not as wide as they seem, yet you should force another to jump first. ---
**Author:** ![kingpengvin](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/9dc877/32.png) [@kingpengvin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kingpengvin)\ **Post date:** [October 23, 2003, 1:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/klingon-proverbs/209095/2 "2003-10-23T13:07:37Z")
**A Klingon Fable** A torQue and an B’nath met one day in the field. The TorQue was hungry and said to the B’nath, “You are weak and slow I will eat you!” The B’nath begged the torQue not to eat him. The TorQue looked at the skinny creature and took pity upon it. “You are too scrawny for me to eat go on your way,” When the TorQue turned away to look for fatter prey he was set upon by the B’nath who tore out the TorQue’s throat. Moral: No enemy is too weak to be vanquished. and then these are from the Original series: A running man can cut a thousand throats in one night. Only a fool fights in burning house. ---
**Author:** ![Menocchio](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/9de053/32.png) [@Menocchio](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Menocchio)\ **Post date:** [October 23, 2003, 3:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/klingon-proverbs/209095/3 "2003-10-23T15:54:22Z")
Revenge is a dish best served cold. -Old Klingon Proverb ---
**Author:** ![carnivorousplant](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/carnivorousplant/32/3563_2.png) [@carnivorousplant](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/carnivorousplant)\ **Post date:** [October 23, 2003, 6:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/klingon-proverbs/209095/4 "2003-10-23T18:09:06Z")
Two Earthers can keep a secret, if both of them are dead. ---
**Author:** ![Dr.Rieux](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/aeb1de/32.png) [@Dr.Rieux](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dr.Rieux)\ **Post date:** [October 23, 2003, 6:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/klingon-proverbs/209095/5 "2003-10-23T18:14:31Z")
Bargain with a Ferengi only after shoving him out of an airlock. ---
**Author:** ![AncientHumanoid](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ancienthumanoid/32/278_2.png) [@AncientHumanoid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AncientHumanoid)\ **Post date:** [October 23, 2003, 6:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/klingon-proverbs/209095/6 "2003-10-23T18:36:27Z")
A bird in the hand… …has no honor. Kill it. ---
**Author:** ![rjung](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/45deac/32.png) [@rjung](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/rjung)\ **Post date:** [October 23, 2003, 7:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/klingon-proverbs/209095/7 "2003-10-23T19:42:06Z")
“Today is a good day for you to die!” ---
**Author:** ![Capt\_B.Phart](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/9fc29f/32.png) [@Capt\_B.Phart](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Capt_B.Phart)\ **Post date:** [October 23, 2003, 8:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/klingon-proverbs/209095/8 "2003-10-23T20:20:07Z")
Thought this was about Klingon \ ***perverts** \* … ::sneaks off:: ---
**Author:** ![carnivorousplant](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/carnivorousplant/32/3563_2.png) [@carnivorousplant](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/carnivorousplant)\ **Post date:** [October 23, 2003, 8:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/klingon-proverbs/209095/9 "2003-10-23T20:43:02Z")
Klingon perverts: “Did you hear that Kang gave his mistress…foreplay?!” “Do not spread rumors of so noble a warrior…you will destroy his reputation, and we all have our weak moments.” ---
**Author:** ![vibrotronica](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/a9a28c/32.png) [@vibrotronica](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/vibrotronica)\ **Post date:** [October 23, 2003, 8:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/klingon-proverbs/209095/10 "2003-10-23T20:58:29Z")
Happy 6000th post, **carnivorousplant**! ---
**Author:** ![Bryan\_Ekers](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bryan_ekers/32/183_2.png) [@Bryan\_Ekers](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bryan_Ekers)\ **Post date:** [October 23, 2003, 9:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/klingon-proverbs/209095/11 "2003-10-23T21:18:22Z")
If it ain’t broke, break it. ---
**Author:** ![carnivorousplant](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/carnivorousplant/32/3563_2.png) [@carnivorousplant](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/carnivorousplant)\ **Post date:** [October 23, 2003, 9:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/klingon-proverbs/209095/12 "2003-10-23T21:36:18Z")
Thanks, vibrotronica. ---
**Author:** ![Malacandra](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/45deac/32.png) [@Malacandra](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Malacandra)\ **Post date:** [October 23, 2003, 9:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/klingon-proverbs/209095/13 "2003-10-23T21:36:37Z")
A fool and his head are soon parted. The way to a man’s heart is through his stomach (the direct stroke may hit the ribs). A kind word and a sharp bat’leh earns you more than a kind word, although not significantly more than the bat’leh alone. When you have them by the \<_long series of grisly-sounding Klingon words snipped_: Editor\>, their hearts and minds will follow. One may smile and smile, and yet be a villain. That’s the beauty of it 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![Miller](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/miller/32/481_2.png) [@Miller](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Miller)\ **Post date:** [October 23, 2003, 10:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/klingon-proverbs/209095/14 "2003-10-23T22:03:23Z")
You can lead a Karg beast into battle, but you can’t make it drink the blood of your enemies. ---
**Author:** ![BrainGlutton](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/82dd89/32.png) [@BrainGlutton](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BrainGlutton)\ **Post date:** [October 23, 2003, 11:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/klingon-proverbs/209095/15 "2003-10-23T23:39:07Z")
From _Voyager_ (I forget the episode – but it’s from B’elana’s long dream sequence when she’s having a crisis of conscience over her Klingon heritage): Eat this, or I will force it down the gullet of your corpse!" (Cook’s slogan.) From the movie STVI: “Shakespeare is better in the original Klingon.” (From the same film: Spock: “There is an ancient Vulcan proverb: Only Nixon could go to China.”) ---
**Author:** ![Capt\_B.Phart](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/9fc29f/32.png) [@Capt\_B.Phart](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Capt_B.Phart)\ **Post date:** [October 24, 2003, 1:31am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/klingon-proverbs/209095/16 "2003-10-24T01:31:00Z")
::sneaks back:: “baHjan?, We don’t need no stinking baHjan!” ---
**Author:** ![BrainGlutton](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/82dd89/32.png) [@BrainGlutton](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BrainGlutton)\ **Post date:** [October 24, 2003, 1:52am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/klingon-proverbs/209095/17 "2003-10-24T01:52:51Z")
“A stranger is just an enemy who has not yet attacked you.” ---
**Author:** ![Spectre\_of\_Pithecanthropus](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/spectre_of_pithecanthropus/32/12343_2.png) [@Spectre\_of\_Pithecanthropus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Spectre_of_Pithecanthropus)\ **Post date:** [October 24, 2003, 3:01am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/klingon-proverbs/209095/18 "2003-10-24T03:01:30Z")
From TOS, _Day Of The Dove_: A running man can cut 4000 throats in one night. ---
**Author:** ![Bean\_Counter](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/db5fbb/32.png) [@Bean\_Counter](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bean_Counter)\ **Post date:** [October 24, 2003, 3:47am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/klingon-proverbs/209095/19 "2003-10-24T03:47:39Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by kingpengvin \* > **A running man can cut a thousand throats in one night.** > [@](#): > > _Originally posted by Spectre of Pithecanthropus_ > **A running man can cut 4000 throats in one night.** Damned Klingon inflation rate. One moon blows up and EVERYTHING goes to hell. ---
**Author:** ![moriah](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/b2d939/32.png) [@moriah](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/moriah)\ **Post date:** [October 24, 2003, 6:16am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/klingon-proverbs/209095/20 "2003-10-24T06:16:26Z")
Make war, not the state of the absence of war characterized by the weak not seeking to vanquish others by dying gloriously in battle.[sup]\*[/sup] Not the state of the absence of war characterized by the weak not seeking to vanquish others by dying gloriously in battle, ## -moriah [sup]\*An ancient proverb, before the time that the Klingons had a word for ‘peace.’[/sup] [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/klingon-proverbs/209095.md?page=2)