# "Known To Police" and other ways you DON'T want to be described **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [February 17, 2009, 5:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/known-to-police-and-other-ways-you-dont-want-to-be-described/486293 "2009-02-17T17:37:18Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 6
**Author:** ![Creaky](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/e68b1a/32.png) [@Creaky](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Creaky)\ **Post date:** [February 20, 2009, 2:01am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/known-to-police-and-other-ways-you-dont-want-to-be-described/486293/101 "2009-02-20T02:01:30Z")
“…had a history of mental illness.” Definitely doesn’t help witness or suspect credibility. ---
**Author:** ![Kozmik](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/8dc957/32.png) [@Kozmik](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kozmik)\ **Post date:** [February 20, 2009, 2:46am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/known-to-police-and-other-ways-you-dont-want-to-be-described/486293/102 "2009-02-20T02:46:48Z")
“also known as…” ---
**Author:** ![Chronos](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/chronos/32/134_2.png) [@Chronos](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chronos)\ **Post date:** [February 20, 2009, 3:08am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/known-to-police-and-other-ways-you-dont-want-to-be-described/486293/103 "2009-02-20T03:08:26Z")
> [@](#): > > “Eccentric” means “crazy, but rich.” Not necessarily. Professors can also be eccentric, regardless of monetary status. ---
**Author:** ![Scissorjack](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/c67d28/32.png) [@Scissorjack](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Scissorjack)\ **Post date:** [February 20, 2009, 4:43am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/known-to-police-and-other-ways-you-dont-want-to-be-described/486293/104 "2009-02-20T04:43:35Z")
> [@Creaky](#): > > “…had a history of mental illness.” > > Definitely doesn’t help witness or suspect credibility. Y’know, I was waiting for this one. As someone who _has_ a history of mental illness, I question why it’s any more of a pejorative term than “a history of diabetes”, other than because of popular media stereotypes of mental illness as somehow evil, criminal or degenerate. ---
**Author:** ![Cyberhwk](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/7993a0/32.png) [@Cyberhwk](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cyberhwk)\ **Post date:** [February 21, 2009, 12:53am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/known-to-police-and-other-ways-you-dont-want-to-be-described/486293/105 "2009-02-21T00:53:02Z")
> [@RickJay](#): > > If we’re allowing physical descriptions, you have to admit that this, as well as the following phrases, are definitely less desirable than somehting like “died peacefully in her/his sleep”: > > “Decapitated” > > “In a hail of bullets” > > “Explosively decompressed” > > “Gnawed on by his dogs” **Not fit for viewing.** ---
**Author:** ![cuberdon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/45deac/32.png) [@cuberdon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/cuberdon)\ **Post date:** [February 21, 2009, 1:21am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/known-to-police-and-other-ways-you-dont-want-to-be-described/486293/106 "2009-02-21T01:21:06Z")
> [@RickJay](#): > > If we’re allowing physical descriptions, you have to admit that this, as well as the following phrases, are definitely less desirable than somehting like “died peacefully in her/his sleep”: > > “Decapitated” > > “In a hail of bullets” > > “Explosively decompressed” > > “Gnawed on by his dogs” “in a state of advanced decomposition” ---
**Author:** ![Odesio](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/odesio/32/20003_2.png) [@Odesio](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Odesio)\ **Post date:** [February 21, 2009, 1:27am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/known-to-police-and-other-ways-you-dont-want-to-be-described/486293/107 "2009-02-21T01:27:00Z")
> [@matt\_mcl](#): > > There was once a thread about phrases you don’t want to have in your obituary. Mine were **lifelong bachelor, longtime companion,** and **complications from pneumonia**. I shouldn’t be laughing at this but you really cracked me up. Is it 1986 again? Kudos, good sir, kudos! ---
**Author:** ![salinqmind](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/3ec8ea/32.png) [@salinqmind](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/salinqmind)\ **Post date:** [February 21, 2009, 4:15am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/known-to-police-and-other-ways-you-dont-want-to-be-described/486293/108 "2009-02-21T04:15:31Z")
> [@Malleus\_Incus\_Stapes](#): > > ^ I dunno about that last one. I don’t necessarily think being a crazy cat lady is a bad thing (which is good, as I’m well on my way to becoming one). Me, too. I only hope I don’t end up in a front page story someday…“the body of the elderly recluse was found, gnawed by her many cats, after neighbors reported a bad odor…” Many badasses around here resort to shooting or stabbing other badasses who sell them imitation drugs, give them the stinkeye, or are involved in one of those mysterious unspecified ‘long-running disputes’. An alarming number, though, are: “transported to the hospital for treatment after being shot/stabbed in the buttocks”. Now, your run- of- the- mill cheap thief, say, a purse snatcher, is often chased down by the police: "police tracked the suspect, following his footprints in the snow, to a house they entered and searched. The police apprehended the suspect hiding: (pick one) - in a closet among the coats - under a pile of dirty laundry - under his momma’s bed " ---
**Author:** ![Creaky](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/e68b1a/32.png) [@Creaky](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Creaky)\ **Post date:** [February 21, 2009, 2:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/known-to-police-and-other-ways-you-dont-want-to-be-described/486293/109 "2009-02-21T14:50:34Z")
> [@Scissorjack](#): > > Y’know, I was waiting for this one. As someone who _has_ a history of mental illness, I question why it’s any more of a pejorative term than “a history of diabetes”, other than because of popular media stereotypes of mental illness as somehow evil, criminal or degenerate. Dude, check your Private Message Mailbox. 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![Gala\_Matrix\_Fire](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/4da419/32.png) [@Gala\_Matrix\_Fire](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gala_Matrix_Fire)\ **Post date:** [February 21, 2009, 4:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/known-to-police-and-other-ways-you-dont-want-to-be-described/486293/110 "2009-02-21T16:50:08Z")
“…authorities had to remove a wall to remove the half-ton-plus woman…” “…the YouTube video of the embarrassing incident garnered over a million hits in two days…” ---
**Author:** ![Captain\_Amazing](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/6de8d8/32.png) [@Captain\_Amazing](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Captain_Amazing)\ **Post date:** [February 21, 2009, 5:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/known-to-police-and-other-ways-you-dont-want-to-be-described/486293/111 "2009-02-21T17:05:05Z")
“Recovering/in recovery” “In stable condition” “Former reality TV star” ---
**Author:** ![pendgwen](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/3da27b/32.png) [@pendgwen](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pendgwen)\ **Post date:** [February 21, 2009, 10:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/known-to-police-and-other-ways-you-dont-want-to-be-described/486293/112 "2009-02-21T22:37:22Z")
In a similar vein to the OP’s “known to police” I sometimes see ER notes describing a patient as “well known to ER staff”. Almost always indicates that the patient will be complicated either medically or socially. ---
**Author:** ![Jackmannii](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jackmannii/32/311_2.png) [@Jackmannii](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jackmannii)\ **Post date:** [February 21, 2009, 11:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/known-to-police-and-other-ways-you-dont-want-to-be-described/486293/113 "2009-02-21T23:04:33Z")
> [@LouiseE](#): > > “in a state of advanced decomposition” “An entomology expert was called in to establish the time of death”. ---
**Author:** ![Mighty\_Girl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/7bcc69/32.png) [@Mighty\_Girl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mighty_Girl)\ **Post date:** [February 22, 2009, 2:45am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/known-to-police-and-other-ways-you-dont-want-to-be-described/486293/114 "2009-02-22T02:45:58Z")
Wanted in connection… Last seen… ---
**Author:** ![Der\_Trihs](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/der_trihs/32/233_2.png) [@Der\_Trihs](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Der_Trihs)\ **Post date:** [February 22, 2009, 2:50am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/known-to-police-and-other-ways-you-dont-want-to-be-described/486293/115 "2009-02-22T02:50:04Z")
“widely distributed remains” “suspected cult leader” ---
**Author:** ![Vox\_Imperatoris](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/f9ae1b/32.png) [@Vox\_Imperatoris](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Vox_Imperatoris)\ **Post date:** [February 22, 2009, 2:51am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/known-to-police-and-other-ways-you-dont-want-to-be-described/486293/116 "2009-02-22T02:51:04Z")
“Winner of the Eurovison Song Contest” Valete, Vox Imperatoris ---
**Author:** ![Der\_Trihs](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/der_trihs/32/233_2.png) [@Der\_Trihs](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Der_Trihs)\ **Post date:** [February 22, 2009, 4:30am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/known-to-police-and-other-ways-you-dont-want-to-be-described/486293/117 "2009-02-22T04:30:07Z")
“known cannibal” ---
**Author:** ![Vox\_Imperatoris](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/f9ae1b/32.png) [@Vox\_Imperatoris](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Vox_Imperatoris)\ **Post date:** [February 22, 2009, 4:45am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/known-to-police-and-other-ways-you-dont-want-to-be-described/486293/118 "2009-02-22T04:45:43Z")
> [@willthekittensurvive](#): > > Big in Japan I didn’t see this one the first time. So true. 😛 Valete, Vox Imperatoris ---
**Author:** ![Green\_Bean](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/green_bean/32/1760_2.png) [@Green\_Bean](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Green_Bean)\ **Post date:** [February 22, 2009, 4:53am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/known-to-police-and-other-ways-you-dont-want-to-be-described/486293/119 "2009-02-22T04:53:59Z")
“Closed-casket funeral” (if the decedent is not of a group who doesn’t do the open-casket thing) And in many cases, “entrepreneur” is most definitely not a compliment. ---
**Author:** ![dogbutler](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dogbutler/32/428_2.png) [@dogbutler](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dogbutler)\ **Post date:** [February 22, 2009, 4:57am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/known-to-police-and-other-ways-you-dont-want-to-be-described/486293/120 "2009-02-22T04:57:49Z")
In connection with a police search of your home: “refrigerator full of eyeballs” “4 partially consumed human torsos” “pyramid of human skulls” “extensive NKOTB record collection” [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/known-to-police-and-other-ways-you-dont-want-to-be-described/486293.md?page=5) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/known-to-police-and-other-ways-you-dont-want-to-be-described/486293.md?page=7)