# Ladies: If you were a Lesbian... **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [May 10, 2000, 1:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ladies-if-you-were-a-lesbian/19111 "2000-05-10T13:28:22Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 14\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![neuro-trash\_grrrl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/3ab097/32.png) [@neuro-trash\_grrrl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/neuro-trash_grrrl)\ **Post date:** [May 11, 2000, 4:25am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ladies-if-you-were-a-lesbian/19111/41 "2000-05-11T04:25:12Z")
Ignoring the “if” part of the thread title, I have to say that I really don’t know… Analyzing all my crushes, past and present, there really isn’t much of a common denominator, in terms of physical type, “looks”, or appearance. My crushes have come in all shapes and sizes. In terms of what’s underneath the surface, there is more of a corellation, but not much. I have a definite preference for intelligence, and I do like strong, independent women, and artistic ability and other means of expressing beauty of spirit certainly don’t hurt, but any of these can go by the wayside at any particular moment. In short, who knows? Regarding famous people: I admit to having had crushes on various celebrities at various points, but these are few and far between. I can’t really stay in love with actresses, since they’re just that. They appear in one movie, and you think “My god, she’s incredible!” You catch the next movie they’re in, and she’s totally different… different role. What is she really like? Again, who knows? ---
**Author:** ![evilbeth](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/evilbeth/32/2268_2.png) [@evilbeth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/evilbeth)\ **Post date:** [May 11, 2000, 4:26am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ladies-if-you-were-a-lesbian/19111/42 "2000-05-11T04:26:33Z")
I will have to say Kate Winslet. She has womanly curves and her face is absolutely beautiful. I fell in lust with her when I first saw _Heavenly Creatures_. I would just love to caress that woman, head to toe…excuse me, I nned some water… ---
**Author:** ![Shirley\_Ujest](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/45deac/32.png) [@Shirley\_Ujest](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shirley_Ujest)\ **Post date:** [May 11, 2000, 12:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ladies-if-you-were-a-lesbian/19111/43 "2000-05-11T12:21:20Z")
> [@](#): > > \*\* > ::coughing on cigar:: > > What?! > > How could anyone find that area ugly? Men respect each and every vulva as a work of art, and admire them all for their defining characteristics. > > Please feel free to use [This Product](http://www.cloneyourbone.com/myskit.htm) and send the resulting cast to The Lawn Chair Boys Club. Heck, we’ll even pick up the postage. > > ::returning to smoke cigars and swill beer with the fellas:: > \*\* Maybe because I own one and it’s hardly elusive. It’s always there. ---
**Author:** ![Shirley\_Ujest](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/45deac/32.png) [@Shirley\_Ujest](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shirley_Ujest)\ **Post date:** [May 11, 2000, 12:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ladies-if-you-were-a-lesbian/19111/44 "2000-05-11T12:26:35Z")
Oh, as for the websight, wouldn’t casting a replica of your netherworld, well, burn, as it is wax? ---
**Author:** ![Flutterby](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/6f9a4e/32.png) [@Flutterby](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Flutterby)\ **Post date:** [May 11, 2000, 12:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ladies-if-you-were-a-lesbian/19111/45 "2000-05-11T12:45:11Z")
I’ve never really thought about it before though I do kinda admire fantasy pictures sometimes on the net. _grins a little sheepishly_ Usually when looking for pics for my role playing characters. (Some of which who if were real I might like…) But yah I always admired Ellen (Sharon Stone) in The Quick and the Dead and Sorsha (Joanne Whalley whom I just learned married Val… hmm interesting) in Willow. I guess I admire the characters more then the people themselves. Just that something about them. ---
**Author:** ![Kiki](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/dc4da7/32.png) [@Kiki](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kiki)\ **Post date:** [May 11, 2000, 2:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ladies-if-you-were-a-lesbian/19111/46 "2000-05-11T14:36:50Z")
I just watched Varsity Blues (again) last night on Showtime and I must say… the girl with the whipped cream bikini is kind of cute and has a pretty nice body. My boyfriend thinks so too. I know that I like men **way too much** to _ever_ be with a woman but I did like that whipped cream bikini… I may have to make one sometime and see if my boyfriend’s eyes pop out of his head like they did last night when he saw that scene. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Mr.Cynical](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/ee59a6/32.png) [@Mr.Cynical](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mr.Cynical)\ **Post date:** [May 11, 2000, 3:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ladies-if-you-were-a-lesbian/19111/47 "2000-05-11T15:05:48Z")
Shirley Ujest sez: > [@](#): > > \*\* > Oh, as for the websight, wouldn’t casting a replica of your netherworld, well, burn, as it is wax? > \*\* I think the initial casting is done in plaster, with the resulting mold filled with wax. Can you imagine making that into a candle? I guess it would work better for the men’s product, eh? ---
**Author:** ![Shayna](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/shayna/32/17976_2.png) [@Shayna](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shayna)\ **Post date:** [May 11, 2000, 5:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ladies-if-you-were-a-lesbian/19111/48 "2000-05-11T17:37:01Z")
**handy** , how did I miss your lovely compliment before? Thank you - that’s very sweet of you to say. ::blushing:: **Shirley** , I’m not sure I’d consider this an “outing” since all I’ve really said is that I wouldn’t mind _trying_ it once _out of curiosity_. Turkey basters hold no interest for me, though. 😉 **Barabbas** , please re-read my reply. You quoted it here, yet you completely misinterpreted it. I said _that picture_ is gross. And I stand by that statement. Nowhere did I say that the woman, herself, was too skinny, did I? She _does_ look like a concentration camp victim in that shot, and I think it’s extremely unflattering. The other picture you provided is much nicer. I still don’t find her attractive, but I don’t know who she is, so that could have something to do with it. I am familiar with the 2 ladies I mentioned, and knowing something about them adds to their appeal to me. **Doghouse Reilly** , Oh My Gawd. How presumptuous and downright laughable of you to imply that because I don’t find one particular woman attractive that I must be envious of her. There are plenty of women that I’d readily admit are far sexier than I, and I do not envy them in the least. Sharon Stone comes to mind (and I should have mentioned her above, but forgot). I also happen to think Wendy Moniz is sexier than I am. And I don’t envy her either. What the hell kind of sick logic makes you attribute women not finding certain other women attractive to jealousy? ---
**Author:** ![jesjam901](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/5f8ce5/32.png) [@jesjam901](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jesjam901)\ **Post date:** [May 11, 2000, 5:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ladies-if-you-were-a-lesbian/19111/49 "2000-05-11T17:42:51Z")
Helena Bonham Carter ---
**Author:** ![KimKatt](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/ac91a4/32.png) [@KimKatt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/KimKatt)\ **Post date:** [May 11, 2000, 5:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ladies-if-you-were-a-lesbian/19111/50 "2000-05-11T17:49:16Z")
I’ve always been bi-curious in a fantasizing sort of way, but always just thinking or talking. I don’t think I would actually want the experience, it’s just an erotic thing to imagine. There’s an erotic turn on at looking at pictures of either, or both, but when it comes down to the physical, I need the, ummm, extra attachment. That said, I think that when it comes to the purely physical, naked female bodies are more attractive than naked male bodies. I’d rather stare and drool over a well built guy in his boxers than in the buff. BTW, on a related note, a very good gay friend once told me that out of all the women of his acquaintance, I was the one he was most attracted to, except that he couldn’t get over my appearance being just too feminine. And I quote, “We’d make a perfect couple if your bumps weren’t in all the wrong places.” That is one of the best compliments I have ever received. ---
**Author:** ![Milossarian](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/3ec8ea/32.png) [@Milossarian](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Milossarian)\ **Post date:** [May 11, 2000, 6:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ladies-if-you-were-a-lesbian/19111/51 "2000-05-11T18:05:20Z")
Funny, my wife never seems to want to play this game. And being the ever-helpful hubby, I provide many tips and ideas that you’d think she would appreciate. I’ve even proposed different themes to help keep things interesting – you know, for her. There’s the Law&Order Theme (her, Carrie Lowell and Angie Harmon), The Country Music Theme (her, Faith Hill and Shania Twain), etc. Still can’t seem to get her enthusiastic about it. Hmphf. Scootch over, fellas. ---
**Author:** ![Shirley\_Ujest](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/45deac/32.png) [@Shirley\_Ujest](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shirley_Ujest)\ **Post date:** [May 11, 2000, 8:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ladies-if-you-were-a-lesbian/19111/52 "2000-05-11T20:32:42Z")
Milo, you and all husbands have this not-so-secret fantasy. Not being into country Music, hubby was watching CMT one afternoon (before Shania became HUGE) and was just drooling over her. I said to him, “She’s gonna go far she’s a babe and a half.I could become a lesbian for her.” He responded something like, " I could do her in a minute." Me ( kicking the door shut) " From my experiene, its more like thirty seconds." Men, you guys are so cute when you pout. ---
**Author:** ![GraceTX](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/c4cdca/32.png) [@GraceTX](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/GraceTX)\ **Post date:** [May 12, 2000, 1:41am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ladies-if-you-were-a-lesbian/19111/53 "2000-05-12T01:41:24Z")
Oh boy! If I were were a lesbian Selma Hayek and Ashley Judd would do it for me. There’s also someone I see once or month or so at work. I haven’t quite figured out what it is about this woman but every time I see her, she makes my tongue sweat. ---
**Author:** ![Koxinga](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/4af34b/32.png) [@Koxinga](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Koxinga)\ **Post date:** [May 12, 2000, 6:34am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ladies-if-you-were-a-lesbian/19111/54 "2000-05-12T06:34:00Z")
Shayna said: > [@](#): > > Doghouse Reilly, Oh My Gawd. How presumptuous and downright laughable of you to imply that because I don’t find one particular woman attractive that I must be envious of her. There are plenty of women that I’d readily admit are far sexier than I, and I do not envy them in the least. Sharon Stone comes to mind (and I should have mentioned her above, but forgot). I also happen to think Wendy Moniz is sexier than I am. And I don’t envy her either. What the hell kind of sick logic makes you attribute women not finding certain other women attractive to jealousy? (Indulgent little masculine chuckle) Sure, babe. I would love to be having this conversation with you in real life, so I could have heard your shrill little laugh after that opening “Oh. My. Gawd.” and observed your jerky body language (it would be even better if you smoke, 'cause at that point you would have taken a sudden, violent drag on a cigarette, probably accompanied by a little facial tic). You find some women sexy, and you don’t envy them? Wassamatter, you don’t like being sexy? And note that I didn’t say that “certain posters” didn’t find some other women attractive due to envy–I said that that they just refused to _acknowledge_ finding those women (just a little _too_) sexy. Your Doghouse, from inside the doghouse [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ladies-if-you-were-a-lesbian/19111.md?page=2)