# Ladies...Learning oral...umm..ya know (Way TMI) **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [February 5, 2004, 5:20am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ladies-learning-oral-umm-ya-know-way-tmi/227625 "2004-02-05T05:20:40Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 12\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Trob](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/6f9a4e/32.png) [@Trob](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Trob)\ **Post date:** [February 5, 2004, 5:20am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ladies-learning-oral-umm-ya-know-way-tmi/227625/1 "2004-02-05T05:20:40Z")
OK ladies I need some more advice. Oh and BTW thank you for your opinions on my last thread. Mt friend’s current, and hopefully last SO, has expressed a concern as to her lack of experience in the oral area. I warned you that this was WAY TMI. She has also expressed a desire to learn. The question before the panel is: How would one go about teaching such a thing? The obvious answer would be to pop in an adult video and say “See how she hold that and tickles the twins while she…” Well you get the idea. Or would a dry talk about what is good over a glass of wine be better. Another option would be a lab practicle if you will. I need a frank discussion. Also for those of you who are shy, and you know who you are, how would you like to be told. And since I do fancy eye contact, how would a certain someone like to have the subject aproached? I await your input. ---
**Author:** ![Larry\_Griffin-Kentzel](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/larry_griffin-kentzel/32/14787_2.png) [@Larry\_Griffin-Kentzel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Larry_Griffin-Kentzel)\ **Post date:** [February 5, 2004, 5:40am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ladies-learning-oral-umm-ya-know-way-tmi/227625/2 "2004-02-05T05:40:42Z")
This thread is better suited for [**In My Humble Opinion**](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/forumdisplay.php?f=12). I’ll move it for you. **Cajun Man** for the SDMB ---
**Author:** ![SanguineSpider](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/e9a140/32.png) [@SanguineSpider](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SanguineSpider)\ **Post date:** [February 5, 2004, 5:50am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ladies-learning-oral-umm-ya-know-way-tmi/227625/3 "2004-02-05T05:50:59Z")
She needs to talk to her SO about HIS likes and dislikes in the oral arena. Books, mags, and videos are resources but she should first and foremost consult the person who’ll be on the receiving end. All guys are different when it comes to oral sex. She can also experiment (he’ll like this) and play around. Without getting TMI myself, I love to give it and my SO loves getting it, most guys do. Use of teeth is extremely touchy, I can assure you. Teeth can hurt and ruin the session BUT OTOH, some rare men do like it. The first time I ever gave, my boyfriend let me experiment (he was a virgin, too) and together we enjoyed the heck out of it. Trust what the guy says about what he likes, that part of his anatomy is well-known to him _wink_. Some guys are passive about getting it (letting the girl take control), some are agressive (like holding the girl’s head firmly and moving himself). Tell your friend that she’s in for a treat! It’s a great way to show affection and love. It’ll blow his mind (pardon my pun) if she does it sometimes without expecting anything in return (example: she’s got her period and doesn’t want sex but still wants to be sexy and make him feel good). Hope that helps your friend! ---
**Author:** ![CrazyCatLady](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/dfb087/32.png) [@CrazyCatLady](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CrazyCatLady)\ **Post date:** [February 5, 2004, 9:13am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ladies-learning-oral-umm-ya-know-way-tmi/227625/4 "2004-02-05T09:13:08Z")
Practice, practice, practice. Trial and error is the best teacher for most things sexual. Every man is different, every woman is different, and every relationship is different, and it can take a while to figure out what works best for that particular combination. Besides, getting in there and getting your hands dirty (so to speak) is bound to be more fun for everyone involved than sitting through a lecture. It’s something you should probably take pretty slowly at first, though. It takes some time to build skill and stamina (jaw cramps, gag reflex and all that, you know), and when she says she’s done, SHE IS DONE. Period, end of discussion, time to move along to something else. You push it after that, and your odds of getting more head any time soon go way, way down. ---
**Author:** ![Really\_Not\_All\_That\_Bright](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/e8c25b/32.png) [@Really\_Not\_All\_That\_Bright](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Really_Not_All_That_Bright)\ **Post date:** [February 5, 2004, 9:26am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ladies-learning-oral-umm-ya-know-way-tmi/227625/5 "2004-02-05T09:26:35Z")
From a guy’s perspective (not that one was asked for, admittedly), the fact that she wants to learn means she’s off to a good start. There are only a few absolutes when it comes to men and their likes and dislikes as far as recieving oral sex goes, and number one is… 1. If you enjoy giving it we WILL enjoy recieving it. The others: 1. (this is really co-number one) Don’t bite. You can bite us anywhere else, but not there. It is quite possible we’ll kick you if you do. Just a reflex, but it will probably hurt. 2. The name is misleading. We like it when you use your hands, not just your mouth. 3. Telling us you haven’t done it much (or at all) before isn’t a bad thing. We are more than happy to serve as guineau pigs- feel free to think of us as a laboratory. 4. We don’t expect you to swallow the whole damn thing. If you can, we may be thrilled (or stunned, at least), but if it was important to us, we’d hang out at the circus and hit on sword-swallowers. It is my fervent wish that all women, everywhere, (except lesbians, who may still do so for their own edification) read [this thread.](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=237412) ---
**Author:** ![Bruce\_Daddy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/85f322/32.png) [@Bruce\_Daddy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bruce_Daddy)\ **Post date:** [February 5, 2004, 11:08am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ladies-learning-oral-umm-ya-know-way-tmi/227625/6 "2004-02-05T11:08:26Z")
> [@dutchboy208](#): > > number one is… > > 1. If you enjoy giving it we WILL enjoy recieving it. Bingo. Enthusiasm trumps all. ---
**Author:** ![dantheman](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dantheman/32/9421_2.png) [@dantheman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dantheman)\ **Post date:** [February 5, 2004, 11:10am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ladies-learning-oral-umm-ya-know-way-tmi/227625/7 "2004-02-05T11:10:34Z")
[This may be a helpful thread to peruse](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=55273) ---
**Author:** ![Rashak\_Mani](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/ea666f/32.png) [@Rashak\_Mani](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rashak_Mani)\ **Post date:** [February 5, 2004, 12:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ladies-learning-oral-umm-ya-know-way-tmi/227625/8 "2004-02-05T12:49:09Z")
Shaft = good to grab and isn’t delicate. Use your hands. Don’t hold it like its porcelain about to break. Head = Delicate especially afterwards. Use tongue more. ---
**Author:** ![AngelicGemma](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/439d5e/32.png) [@AngelicGemma](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AngelicGemma)\ **Post date:** [February 5, 2004, 1:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ladies-learning-oral-umm-ya-know-way-tmi/227625/9 "2004-02-05T13:29:46Z")
My boyfriend is the one who taught me. He just told me what he liked! Simple. ---
**Author:** ![Indygrrl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/58f4c7/32.png) [@Indygrrl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Indygrrl)\ **Post date:** [February 5, 2004, 1:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ladies-learning-oral-umm-ya-know-way-tmi/227625/10 "2004-02-05T13:53:44Z")
> **[Sex Tips For Straight Women from a Gay Man: Anderson, Dan, Berman, Maggie,...](https://www.amazon.com/Sex-Tips-Straight-Women-Gay/dp/0060989092)** > > Sex Tips For Straight Women from a Gay Man \[Anderson, Dan, Berman, Maggie, Maggie Berman\] on Amazon.com. \*FREE\* shipping on qualifying offers. Sex Tips For Straight Women from a Gay Man _Sex Tips for Straight Women from a Gay Man_ This was the singlemost helpful tool I had to learn oral sex. It’s also really funny and teaches you about other things. It’s been priceless in my sex education. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![herownself](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/8baadc/32.png) [@herownself](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/herownself)\ **Post date:** [February 5, 2004, 9:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ladies-learning-oral-umm-ya-know-way-tmi/227625/11 "2004-02-05T21:45:18Z")
I learned most of what I know from my first boyfriend. He just let me play around, and there was very much no stress involved. So, it got to be fun - what could I do to make him loose control. I learned to pay attention to what I was doing and at the same time what it was doing to the person I was with. Change action as needed to produce desired result. Since then, I get no complaints. 🆒 ---
**Author:** ![Casey1505](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/dc4da7/32.png) [@Casey1505](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Casey1505)\ **Post date:** [February 5, 2004, 10:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ladies-learning-oral-umm-ya-know-way-tmi/227625/12 "2004-02-05T22:28:07Z")
If you are on any medication that causes drymouth, your lack of saliva may make it painful for him. I dated a girl for a week who (unbeknownst to me) got raging cottonmouth when she drank. Worst. Head. Ever. Sucking on an Altoid will put temporarily cure your drymouth, among other benefits…