# Ladies: Show Us Your Nipples! **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [November 28, 2011, 5:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ladies-show-us-your-nipples/604356 "2011-11-28T17:40:53Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 15\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Fear\_Itself](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/fear_itself/32/19637_2.png) [@Fear\_Itself](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Fear_Itself)\ **Post date:** [November 28, 2011, 5:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ladies-show-us-your-nipples/604356/1 "2011-11-28T17:40:53Z")
The female breast is one of nature’s exquisite successes, and in my experience (both personal and pornographic), the nipple thereon appears in near infinite variety. Big ones, small ones, long ones, short ones, pink ones, brown ones, we love them all and marvel at their diversity. Ladies, it is time to find out where you fall on the spectrum of nipply goodness. Help us quantify the sublime and add to the sum of human knowledge! Modesty prevails, so it is an anonymous poll to encourage your participation. This poll is specifically about nipples, so no other breasticle dimensions are necessary. Please select one choice in each category. In the event your nipples fall somewhere outside the choices offered in each category, please just do your best and pick the closest selection. Comments encouraged. PTF ---
**Author:** ![robert\_columbia](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/e79b87/32.png) [@robert\_columbia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/robert_columbia)\ **Post date:** [November 28, 2011, 5:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ladies-show-us-your-nipples/604356/2 "2011-11-28T17:42:23Z")
Do you have a National Breast Inspectors Card? ---
**Author:** ![CheeseDonkey](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/ecae2f/32.png) [@CheeseDonkey](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CheeseDonkey)\ **Post date:** [November 28, 2011, 5:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ladies-show-us-your-nipples/604356/3 "2011-11-28T17:43:43Z")
EDIT: Never mind, that sounded really gay. ---
**Author:** ![Fear\_Itself](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/fear_itself/32/19637_2.png) [@Fear\_Itself](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Fear_Itself)\ **Post date:** [November 28, 2011, 5:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ladies-show-us-your-nipples/604356/4 "2011-11-28T17:54:18Z")
Too late to edit: “Aroused” includes cold weather, silk pajamas or anything else that turns on the high beams. ---
**Author:** ![Ludy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/d6d6ee/32.png) [@Ludy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ludy)\ **Post date:** [November 28, 2011, 5:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ladies-show-us-your-nipples/604356/5 "2011-11-28T17:54:20Z")
Somthing like [this](http://www.toysrus.ca/product/index.jsp?productId=11776692) Well at least my 3 month old can’t tell the difference. Or at least he doesn’t care. ---
**Author:** ![Fear\_Itself](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/fear_itself/32/19637_2.png) [@Fear\_Itself](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Fear_Itself)\ **Post date:** [November 28, 2011, 5:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ladies-show-us-your-nipples/604356/6 "2011-11-28T17:55:24Z")
Shit. I screwed that up. I meant to make it multiple choice. Mods ? ---
**Author:** ![Rachellelogram](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/rachellelogram/32/8689_2.png) [@Rachellelogram](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rachellelogram)\ **Post date:** [November 28, 2011, 5:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ladies-show-us-your-nipples/604356/7 "2011-11-28T17:55:37Z")
Jesus Christ. ---
**Author:** ![alice\_in\_wonderland](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/alice_in_wonderland/32/176_2.png) [@alice\_in\_wonderland](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/alice_in_wonderland)\ **Post date:** [November 28, 2011, 5:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ladies-show-us-your-nipples/604356/8 "2011-11-28T17:55:50Z")
> [@Fear\_Itself](#): > > Help us quantify the sublime and add to the sum of human knowledge! Uh, yah. I don’t think so. ---
**Author:** ![Joey\_P](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/919ad9/32.png) [@Joey\_P](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Joey_P)\ **Post date:** [November 28, 2011, 5:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ladies-show-us-your-nipples/604356/9 "2011-11-28T17:57:00Z")
> [@robert\_columbia](#): > > Do you have a National Breast Inspectors Card? He doesn’t need one…He’s FBI. ---
**Author:** ![TheChileanBlob](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/thechileanblob/32/435_2.png) [@TheChileanBlob](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TheChileanBlob)\ **Post date:** [November 28, 2011, 5:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ladies-show-us-your-nipples/604356/10 "2011-11-28T17:58:26Z")
Try a new poll. I’ll answer. ---
**Author:** ![obbn](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/d6d6ee/32.png) [@obbn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/obbn)\ **Post date:** [November 28, 2011, 6:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ladies-show-us-your-nipples/604356/11 "2011-11-28T18:00:13Z")
:DTTIUWP (This Thread Is Useless Without Pictures) ---
**Author:** ![Tamerlane](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tamerlane/32/7602_2.png) [@Tamerlane](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tamerlane)\ **Post date:** [November 28, 2011, 6:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ladies-show-us-your-nipples/604356/12 "2011-11-28T18:02:36Z")
I’m inclined to predict that the last option will get the most votes. But who knows? Maybe as we speak hordes of female Dopers are rushing to the bathroom mirror, ruler and color chart in hand. Maybe. But I still think the last option might get the most votes ;). ---
**Author:** ![Really\_Not\_All\_That\_Bright](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/e8c25b/32.png) [@Really\_Not\_All\_That\_Bright](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Really_Not_All_That_Bright)\ **Post date:** [November 28, 2011, 6:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ladies-show-us-your-nipples/604356/13 "2011-11-28T18:08:03Z")
I hereby propose that breast threads be subject to the Cat Thread Rule. ---
**Author:** ![Fear\_Itself](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/fear_itself/32/19637_2.png) [@Fear\_Itself](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Fear_Itself)\ **Post date:** [November 28, 2011, 6:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ladies-show-us-your-nipples/604356/14 "2011-11-28T18:16:47Z")
Multiple choice poll here: > **[Ladies: Show Us Your Nipples! Redux](https://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=632937)** > > The female breast is one of nature’s exquisite successes, and in my experience (both personal and pornographic), the nipple thereon appears in near infinite variety. Big ones, small ones, long ones, short ones, pink ones, brown ones, we love them... ---
**Author:** ![Marley23](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/45deac/32.png) [@Marley23](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Marley23)\ **Post date:** [November 28, 2011, 7:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ladies-show-us-your-nipples/604356/15 "2011-11-28T19:05:13Z")
Since the OP has opened a new poll, I’m closing this one.