# Lame, face-saving euphemisms **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [February 24, 2010, 5:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lame-face-saving-euphemisms/530275 "2010-02-24T17:35:09Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![EvilTOJ](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/ee59a6/32.png) [@EvilTOJ](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/EvilTOJ)\ **Post date:** [February 25, 2010, 7:23am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lame-face-saving-euphemisms/530275/21 "2010-02-25T07:23:25Z")
> [@LiveOnAPlane](#): > > I’ve heard the Civil War referred to as “The Late Unpleasantness.” This is exactly how I refer to my divorce. ---
**Author:** ![needscoffee](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/needscoffee/32/1076_2.png) [@needscoffee](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/needscoffee)\ **Post date:** [February 25, 2010, 7:38am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lame-face-saving-euphemisms/530275/22 "2010-02-25T07:38:02Z")
I once got an application in the mail for a dating service (pre-internet). In the category of employment, the options were Student, Work full time, Work part time, and My time is my own. ---
**Author:** ![jjimm](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/ba8739/32.png) [@jjimm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jjimm)\ **Post date:** [February 25, 2010, 7:49am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lame-face-saving-euphemisms/530275/23 "2010-02-25T07:49:05Z")
Mistakes were made. ---
**Author:** ![Boyo\_Jim](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/87869e/32.png) [@Boyo\_Jim](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Boyo_Jim)\ **Post date:** [February 25, 2010, 8:36am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lame-face-saving-euphemisms/530275/24 "2010-02-25T08:36:27Z")
I was ‘displaced’ by my employer in December – certainly NOT laid off, oh not at all. I was, er… _moved_, from inside the door to outside. Oh yes, and my pay status changed. ---
**Author:** ![Sailboat](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/sailboat/32/461_2.png) [@Sailboat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sailboat)\ **Post date:** [February 25, 2010, 12:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lame-face-saving-euphemisms/530275/25 "2010-02-25T12:23:55Z")
> [@billfish678](#): > > So, that whole railroad thing was true? I don’t get what you’re asking. Shepherd was a railroad employee, but that’s the only connection I see. ---
**Author:** ![Zeldar](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/b77776/32.png) [@Zeldar](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Zeldar)\ **Post date:** [February 25, 2010, 12:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lame-face-saving-euphemisms/530275/26 "2010-02-25T12:31:41Z")
I hope this counts: Back when I was working there had been some issues that caused a fair amount of bickering and complaining that stopped short of any formal protests or strikes (it was a non-union outfit) or anything drastic like that. Nevertheless, the president felt it an obligation to announce: **We Will Have No Unhappy Employees** ---
**Author:** ![Wheelz](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/wheelz/32/5718_2.png) [@Wheelz](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Wheelz)\ **Post date:** [February 25, 2010, 12:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lame-face-saving-euphemisms/530275/27 "2010-02-25T12:44:54Z")
> [@Zeldar](#): > > I hope this counts: > > Back when I was working there had been some issues that caused a fair amount of bickering and complaining that stopped short of any formal protests or strikes (it was a non-union outfit) or anything drastic like that. Nevertheless, the president felt it an obligation to announce: > > **We Will Have No Unhappy Employees** Heh. I actually kind of like that one. It could have been better only if he’d said, “Quit yer bitchin’ or you’re fired!” ---
**Author:** ![billfish678](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/7bcc69/32.png) [@billfish678](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/billfish678)\ **Post date:** [February 25, 2010, 1:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lame-face-saving-euphemisms/530275/28 "2010-02-25T13:11:52Z")
> [@Sailboat](#): > > I don’t get what you’re asking. Shepherd was a railroad employee, but that’s the only connection I see. It was a lame joke about the underground railroad. And of course the irony that the first guy to get killed was a black man that was already free is there. ---
**Author:** ![dhkendall](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/a9adbd/32.png) [@dhkendall](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dhkendall)\ **Post date:** [February 25, 2010, 1:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lame-face-saving-euphemisms/530275/29 "2010-02-25T13:14:55Z")
> [@needscoffee](#): > > I once got an application in the mail for a dating service (pre-internet). In the category of employment, the options were Student, Work full time, Work part time, and My time is my own. Reminds me of when I often hear in Jeopardy! a particular contestant would be introduced as a “stay at home mom/dad/wife/husband”, which I’ve always thought was code for “currently between jobs” (although, yes, I know that several could actually be deliberately staying home with the kid(s)). Myself, I’ve applied to be on the show (haven’t heard back yet) and my job is scheduled to end early this fall, I’ve told myself that if I get on the show when my job ends, I’ll see if they’ll introduce me as “unemployed bum”. 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![PoorYorick](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/ecccb3/32.png) [@PoorYorick](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/PoorYorick)\ **Post date:** [February 25, 2010, 1:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lame-face-saving-euphemisms/530275/30 "2010-02-25T13:28:11Z")
> [@dhkendall](#): > > Reminds me of when I often hear in Jeopardy! a particular contestant would be introduced as a “stay at home mom/dad/wife/husband”, which I’ve always thought was code for “currently between jobs” (although, yes, I know that several could actually be deliberately staying home with the kid(s)). I’ve reviewed a lot of resumes for IT positions. Every instance of “Independent Consultant” or “Contract Employee” that I saw were euphemisms for temporary short-term jobs while trying to find a permanent position, including things like fixing Uncle Henry’s printer for twenty bucks. Hey, I don’t have a problem with that. You’re trying not to look like a job-hopper while honestly trying the best you can to earn a living. Kind of made me feel sorry for people who really were independent consultants, though. ---
**Author:** ![Mangetout](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mangetout/32/19_2.png) [@Mangetout](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mangetout)\ **Post date:** [February 25, 2010, 1:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lame-face-saving-euphemisms/530275/31 "2010-02-25T13:54:21Z")
How about ‘Working from home’? In very many cases I’ve encountered, _working from home_ actually means ‘shopping or playing golf, perhaps responding to the odd email on my Blackberry’ ---
**Author:** ![silenus](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/silenus/32/166_2.png) [@silenus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/silenus)\ **Post date:** [February 25, 2010, 2:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lame-face-saving-euphemisms/530275/32 "2010-02-25T14:51:59Z")
Those last two drive my wife nuts. She **really is** an independent consultant who works from home. And she makes a pretty penny doing it, too. But it always sounds like she just sits around all day. ---
**Author:** ![Zeldar](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/b77776/32.png) [@Zeldar](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Zeldar)\ **Post date:** [February 25, 2010, 3:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lame-face-saving-euphemisms/530275/33 "2010-02-25T15:14:39Z")
> [@dhkendall](#): > > Reminds me of when I often hear in Jeopardy! a particular contestant would be introduced as a “stay at home mom/dad/wife/husband”, which I’ve always thought was code for “currently between jobs” (although, yes, I know that several could actually be deliberately staying home with the kid(s)). > > Myself, I’ve applied to be on the show (haven’t heard back yet) and my job is scheduled to end early this fall, I’ve told myself that if I get on the show when my job ends, I’ll see if they’ll introduce me as “unemployed bum”. 🙂 For reasons that I hope will be obvious, this post sent me on a search for [How to jazz up an unimpressive resume’](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=465285) which got 13 replies starting on 04-24-2008, 09:22 AM in MPSIMS. The “unemployed bum” terminology could be enhanced if you really don’t much care if you get the job or not, but on Jeopardy! it would get a good laugh if the producers would let you use: Deadbeat Dad Slacker Escaped Convict Registered Sexual Offender Science Experiment ---
**Author:** ![Erdosain](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/erdosain/32/7284_2.png) [@Erdosain](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Erdosain)\ **Post date:** [February 25, 2010, 3:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lame-face-saving-euphemisms/530275/34 "2010-02-25T15:33:05Z")
> [@Zeldar](#): > > For reasons that I hope will be obvious, this post sent me on a search for [How to jazz up an unimpressive resume’](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=465285) which got 13 replies starting on 04-24-2008, 09:22 AM in MPSIMS. > > The “unemployed bum” terminology could be enhanced if you really don’t much care if you get the job or not, but on Jeopardy! it would get a good laugh if the producers would let you use: > > Deadbeat Dad > Slacker > Escaped Convict > Registered Sexual Offender > Science Experiment I’m pretty sure they’d hold back the Registered Sex Offender and just use it for the interview portion. Alex: “Fortunately for our next contestant, there’s no school within 100 yards of the studio…” The oddest Jeopardy intro I’ve heard was “gadabout.” Apparently, they used this instead of his preference of “bon vivant.” I always raise an eyebrow for “stay-at-home wife.” ---
**Author:** ![Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/7cd45c/32.png) [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elendil_s_Heir)\ **Post date:** [February 25, 2010, 4:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lame-face-saving-euphemisms/530275/35 "2010-02-25T16:07:41Z")
> [@Wheelz](#): > > Heh. I actually kind of like that one. It could have been better only if he’d said, “Quit yer bitchin’ or you’re fired!” Reminds me of the workplace sign, “The floggings will continue until morale improves.” ---
**Author:** ![RealityChuck](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/realitychuck/32/195_2.png) [@RealityChuck](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RealityChuck)\ **Post date:** [February 25, 2010, 4:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lame-face-saving-euphemisms/530275/36 "2010-02-25T16:54:09Z")
At the time of the Challenger disaster, NASA created “anomaly teams” to look into it. Not troubleshooters, no sir, because there was no trouble, just anomalies. There’s also the “Boot Monument” at the Saratoga Battlefield: Here’s the entire text: > [@](#): > > “Erected 1887 By > JOHN WATTS de PEYSTER > Brev: Maj: Gen: S.N.Y. > 2nd V. Pres’t Saratoga Mon’t Ass’t’n: > In memory of > the “most brilliant soldier” of the > Continental Army > who was desperately wounded > on this spot the sally port of > BORGOYNES GREAT WESTERN REDOUBT > 7th October, 1777 > winning for his countrymen > the decisive battle of the > American Revolution > and for himself the rank of > Major General.” What seems missing to you? Yup, the name of the person being so honored. It was Benedict Arnold. ---
**Author:** ![pravnik](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/8edcca/32.png) [@pravnik](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pravnik)\ **Post date:** [February 25, 2010, 5:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lame-face-saving-euphemisms/530275/37 "2010-02-25T17:32:46Z")
Not really lame, but a bit of bravado in a bad situation: “Retreat, hell! We’re not retreating, we’re just advancing in a different direction.” - Major General Oliver Prince Smith, commander of the 1st Marine Division (often misattributed to General Douglas MacArthur) ---
**Author:** ![MeanOldLady](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/meanoldlady/32/10737_2.png) [@MeanOldLady](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MeanOldLady)\ **Post date:** [February 25, 2010, 5:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lame-face-saving-euphemisms/530275/38 "2010-02-25T17:38:44Z")
> [@Haunted\_Pasta](#): > > I know of a certain well-known company, which I will only say is international and makes business machines, that calls layoffs “resource actions.” A round of layoffs the company I work for recently had were referred to as “streamlining.” > [@jjimm](#): > > Mistakes were made. I _love_ this one. ---
**Author:** ![jjimm](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/ba8739/32.png) [@jjimm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jjimm)\ **Post date:** [February 25, 2010, 6:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lame-face-saving-euphemisms/530275/39 "2010-02-25T18:07:30Z")
> [@Mangetout](#): > > How about ‘Working from home’? > > In very many cases I’ve encountered, _working from home_ actually means ‘shopping or playing golf, perhaps responding to the odd email on my Blackberry’ AKA “wanking from home”. ---
**Author:** ![Sailboat](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/sailboat/32/461_2.png) [@Sailboat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sailboat)\ **Post date:** [February 25, 2010, 6:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lame-face-saving-euphemisms/530275/40 "2010-02-25T18:12:49Z")
Completely ahistorical, but lame excuse-making rises to the level of an actual art form in Robert Graves’ _[The Persian Version](http://www.poemhunter.com/poem/the-persian-version/)_. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lame-face-saving-euphemisms/530275.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lame-face-saving-euphemisms/530275.md?page=3)